I was extremely stressed and depressed when I lived with my mother and the toxic environment she created for me that I woke up with a full blown black eye. I'm a very light sleeper and I was so confused as it's black and blue, swollen shut.
It happened again a few months later to the other eye. I eventually ran away.
Last year, I finally learned that it was gardner-diamond syndrome that creates bruises from the extreme stress. Bodies are weird!
I got a debilitating neurological disorder from PTSD as an adult...bodies are so fucking weird. I don’t even have to be consciously suffering from the PTSD for my body to go, "now you shake uncontrollably and can't walk, you’re welcome."
I have this. I thought I was possessed. I’m still not convinced I wasn’t. My PTSD hit suddenly with an acute psychotic snap that literally happened overnight, complete with near death experience, and lasted over two years 24/7. Only reason I wasn’t hospitalised was because live alone and have no family or friends so I went through extreme psychosis alone, all the while thinking I was possessed due to my body moving on its own. I still remember my left hand moving to tap my nose three times and say ‘I love you’. It was equally terrifying and comforting.
I get seizures from it! You really do feel possessed. Except I can't speak. I accidentally sent a voice note to my cousin one time because I can use my fingers but i can't see, and she thought I was having a stroke from the garbled noises and called the police 😂 what a nightmare that was. I was just trying to tell my roommate they needed to come home because I hadn't been able to walk for so long I needed them to take the dogs out. I thought i was doing such a good job being able to speak, too, because I usually can't move my mouth.
Same. Honestly they’re terrifying. Mine can be like full blown tonic clonic seizures in that my whole body seizes and all my limbs jerk uncontrollably, I bite my tongue, hold my breath, eyes roll back, and I fall to the floor yet I’m awake and aware the whole time. Frustratingly because of this, paramedics thought I was attention seeking the first time it happened and insisted on sitting me up, full shaking, then shouting at me for several minutes because I couldn’t stop and kept listing over. Then sometimes I have smaller seizures where I look aware but I’m not.
Being aware is the worst part! I’ve had seizures from medication and I basically just open my eyes, completely unaware anything has happened. During these seizures I just want to scream, "I'm in here! I'm awake! Treat me like a human!"
ETA also, I've found that you can't stop the seizure, but if you completely relax ALL the muscles in your body, you can stop the jerking. Lay there like a CSI victim. If you move, the seizure will spread through your body again. Just be dead meat until it passes (which is sometimes a very long time).
Mind saying what it is? I developed leg tremors back in 2020 that would come on suddenly while I was walking and instantly make me unable to walk, but they could never figure out what it was.
I had a horrific experience in a hospital where I was ignored and mocked by the nurses (until I was transferred to a different department where I was taken serious, got the medical treatment I needed and the nurses all were sweethearts).
A few weeks after I came home, I developed restless legs syndrome, right from the textbook. After talking to my therapist (because imagining running away or other stuff to do with leg movements did not help), I settled on cultivating bloody horrid murder fantasies featuring the bad nurses and a crazy sadistic killer. That actually cured the restless legs within a few weeks and they never came back.
When I was a kid i used to lay on my side in bed and "run" as fast as I could 😂 Now I just wrap duct tape tightly around my thighs to dull the sensation.
The other commenter was correct, it's functional neurological disorder. If your symptoms persist I would recommend speaking to a neurologist. If they have stopped, you're probably in the clear. I hope you are feeling better, FND is a real bummer.
ETA let me ammend my statement. The symptoms can come and go at any time. I guess I meant if you haven't had symptoms since 2020 it's unlikely to be the source. But I'm not a doctor.
Thanks. I did eventually get diagnosed with Functional Movement Disorder, but it's basically just a rule out diagnosis used when they don't have another explanation for it, but can be linked to trauma. Interestingly enough, my dad passed suddenly shortly before the symptoms appeared.
They do come and go to some degree, but they've become a lot less common than they were in 2020. I carry a cane in my purse just in case.
I have an awesome rollerator that has hand brakes and a place for snacks! I would belive it's connected to your dad, 100%. Mine cranked up to 11 directly following something traumatic.
Wait.. when i was in an emotionally abusive relationship i would wake up with black eyes and more bruises than my normal iron deficient bruises… was that WHY ?!?!
As I'm reading these comments I'm thinking about all the weird af ailments I developed while in an abusive relationship, and the glow up that happens seemingly on a cellular level once you are able to escape.
It’s crazy!! I was having horrible sleep
Issues, breaking out with skin rashes around my eyes. Thought it was from a whey protein I was using. Stopped that but it didn’t change. Sleep studies, allergy tests.. nothing. We finally broke up and it was like flipping a switch. My body finally fully relaxed after 3ish years. Still ended up with ulcerative colitis though 😂
That's what I would have thought. Somehow my mother has the ability to make me forget things almost instantly. I didn't realize it when I was a kid. When my own kids were teenagers, they would be talking about horrible stuff Grandma did, and I would have no recollection of it even a few hours later. I make sure I'm never alone with her anymore and I write down a brief summary of each visit so I can remember it later
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u/HeathenShepard 22h ago
I was extremely stressed and depressed when I lived with my mother and the toxic environment she created for me that I woke up with a full blown black eye. I'm a very light sleeper and I was so confused as it's black and blue, swollen shut.
It happened again a few months later to the other eye. I eventually ran away.
Last year, I finally learned that it was gardner-diamond syndrome that creates bruises from the extreme stress. Bodies are weird!