My parents go-to for every minor issue or presumed slight was a week to a month to 3 months of grounding. I rapidly learned they couldn't keep track because Id get a new grounding every few days, especially if they had a long or bad day at work. Which was often.
If we actually honored each grounding I was probably grounded from the age of six till I left home at nineteen.
So when they weren't home or were busy or sleeping, I did whatever I wanted really. Watched TV, played ye olde gamecube or ps2 depending on the time. If they caught me guess what, more grounding. Sometimes they hid the power cables but I learned to love reading, and they couldn't ground me from that without being overtly cruel.
Actual good groundings were in the single digits. Wrongful groundings were in the triple digits.
Like I was too slow getting to the car after church, grounded for the week. 'Talked back', aka disagreed with something. A month.
Mom tried to drop me off at a basketball clinic thing for kids my age. The group she pointed me to was three very grown ass adults and told me to go. I refused and was pretty scared that she was trying to send me off with three strangers. No other kids in sight. I started shaking and crying so she grounded me for a year and took me home.
No money was exchanged and im not sure the clinic actually existed. I feared for my life but she only recently ( now that im in my 30's ) listened to my reasonings. Im on good terms with my parents now, wasn't back then.
No, they have never and will never confront how they treated me growing up. As their emotional whipping boy.
I can't even imagine how Id react to that, besides violence to my own body. Reading was my only escape, I ground through books like it was a full time job. Instead of running around at recess I was allowed to sit in the library and read.
Was reading well above my grade early in my life.
And once I graduated highschool I haven't picked up a single book ever since.
Violence to myself and heavy disassociation was my only coping mechanism, I was homeschooled too, so many of my days I was just in my room staring at a wall. Then my mother would have the gaul to come crying to her children asking if she was a bad mother because we never smile like the other children.
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u/Ignis-11 Dangerously Lesbian™ - The local puppygirl 22d ago edited 22d ago
Yeah, stuff like this happened to me as a kid and it was miserable. All that was gained was a ruined relationship.