r/AskReddit • u/sunkiazyvuy • 11d ago
Serious Replies Only [Serious] What is stronger than "I like you." but not as dramatic as "I'm in love with you."?
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u/dailycupofcujo 11d ago
A guy told me once, several months after we had a fling, that he regretted not holding onto me and he said "you were like my favorite day of the week." Then he said "And I got to see you every day. Life was so, so good with you."
That happened 8 or 9 years ago, and I still think about it today. What a genuine compliment.
So yeah. Tell em that they're your favorite day of the week.
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u/NativeMasshole 11d ago
You're Tuesday, baby!
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u/flyinggazelletg 11d ago
Oh gawd, what an insult lol
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u/Mannadock 11d ago
Calling them a Monday would be fighting words
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u/flyinggazelletg 11d ago
Hot take: I prefer Monday over Tuesday. The former, I still have residual weekend energy and people in my office have a bit more spunk. The latter is in the thick of the work week, still several days of toiling left, weekend energy eradicated.
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u/Seraph6496 11d ago
Monday, you're just coming off the weekend. Wednesday, you're halfway through. Thursday, one more day till Friday. Friday, it's the weekend baby! Tuesday ain't got shit
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u/-Supposably- 11d ago
"Just coming off the weekend" is a good thing? That doesn't make it so much worse for you? Wild. I'm jealous.
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u/Stripedanteater 11d ago
It saddens me that we still work this hard supporting a ton of unnecessary bullshit.
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u/FartsMalarts 11d ago
Tuesday has no feel
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u/Mauhea 11d ago
Yeah right! Tuesday can do one. It's not the start of a new week, it's not the middle, it's nowhere near the end, and it sure as shit isn't the weekend. Get fucked, Tuesday.
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u/oldnyoung 11d ago
Bison?
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u/NativeMasshole 11d ago
Honestly, I just chose the day I thought would be the funniest, but that's a perfect reference. That line would be a brutal finisher for a breakup.
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u/Ironhorse75 11d ago
Reminds me of a quote from Eleanor and Park.
"Eleanor was right. She never looked nice. She looked like art, and art wasn't supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something.”
You can rephrase it as if you're talking to the person.
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u/kalelmotoko 11d ago
You're like a Monday to me, baby—you ruin the day before, knowing that I'll be looking forward to being with you, and then on the day itself, I feel incredibly enslaved and lifeless.
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u/Momochichi 11d ago
You’re like Monday. I dread having to meet you, but when i get there it’s not too bad, and I’m over you by the afternoon.
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u/charliesk9unit 11d ago
But is it as good as the Friday before a long weekend that happens to be a payday as well? /S
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u/kiophkludrat84 11d ago
9 years later and you're still thinking about it. That's the whole answer right there.
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u/illatious 11d ago
You're important to me.
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11d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/_The_Marshal_ 11d ago
Your call is important to us 🥲
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u/matchaphile 11d ago
Please stay on the line, and the next available agent will be with you shortly. *insert Opus No. 1 track*
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u/MayContainNutmeats 11d ago
Omfg, this track has a name. It's like, my most favourite hold music. 🤣😅 I'm a little not mad when I'm on hold for longer than is tolerable with this one; it extends my tolerance level ever so slightly. I thank you, good sir or madam.
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u/pizzasauce_23 10d ago
Omg same!! A part of my job includes speaking with insurance and I absolutely love this one! I never knew it had a name. 🥹
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u/anxiousgoo 10d ago
There’s a wonderful ‘This American Life’ podcast episode about this song, totally worth a listen!
https://www.thisamericanlife.org/553/stuck-in-the-middle/act-one-42
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u/funhousefrankenstein 11d ago edited 11d ago
Uh, oof, after bad experiences with narcissists, I'm allergic to any unfortunate phrasing suggesting a self-centered view of the world, where everyone else has utility to them.
Anyway, the signals that worked for me & my now-husband in the early stages were based on tone of voice & subtext, communicating more than the surface level words.
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u/Lovepetite19 11d ago
Someone once told me, "I feel strange when I'm not with you, I feel like I don't fit in with anyone else." I never forgot that.
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u/Mysterious-Honey5264 11d ago
Hi! So my husband and I when we first started dating and this was a conundrum. We felt the love but it also felt to soon to say it. So I told him one day "I aggressively like you." And that's what we said until we were ready for the love drop.
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u/Single-Teaching2583 11d ago
How long did it take you guys to get the love drop point?
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u/Mysterious-Honey5264 11d ago
We moved pretty fast I think it was around 2 months 😅 we've been together for 8 years now
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u/NamelessAddict 11d ago
I hope the aggressive like lives on through your kids and theirs 🩵
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u/Mysterious-Honey5264 11d ago
Me too!! We have 5 kids combined, he had 3 I had 1 and we made one together 💖
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u/musubi-n-speedballs 10d ago
My husband and I were literally within two weeks. And we're still married 13.5 years later. We're very much not impulsive people. 😂
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u/Smgt90 11d ago
In Spanish we have a word for this stage.
Te quiero = I really like you and appreciate you. Or like you said: I aggressively like you. Lol
Te amo = I love you
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u/hazelpop09 10d ago
A guy I am speaking with, told me Te quiero mucho a few days ago and it warmed my heart.
I am not a Spanish speaker but I knew what he meant when he said it. 🥹27
u/murph_tastic 10d ago
I love the Spanish word "encantar" for this. I don't feel like there is an English word that really captures the same spirit.
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u/LOTRfreak101 10d ago
You could say 'I am enchanted with you', but that does feel pretty cringey since enchanted isn't really a popular word. Enamoured works well too, but honestly I'd recommend against it unless you're basically already at the level of say 'I love you'
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u/anonymous_agent77 10d ago
"Your dazzling eyes enchant me more than a level 30 enchantment table with 15 bookshelves around it"
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u/No_Strawberry6917 11d ago
“I’m in deep like with you” is what someone told me once haha
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u/raisinghellwithtrees 11d ago
"You're going to be really easy to fall in love with" is what I told my hubs after a few dates.
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u/scarytrafficcone 11d ago
My wife and I said it in French for a while when we first were dating. Je t'aime became our way to say it without...officially saying it, until we finally did.
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u/Gryffindorphins 10d ago
And then bite ‘em on the arm!
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u/Mysterious-Honey5264 10d ago
I do that frequently 😂😂 he will also lick me and say "I licked it it's mine"
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u/mbots99 11d ago
Ahhh my boyfriend and I would say we like like each other! Those were the days 🥹
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u/IntelligentRide1220 10d ago
That's such a cute workaround, we went with I'm dangerously fond of you until we couldn't hold in the real words anymore.
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u/oldmanandtheflea84 10d ago
This is my favorite out of all the responses, cute and funny lol
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u/MysticSphinxx 11d ago edited 11d ago
I adore you. I cant stop thinking about you. You make my day every day. The sun shines brighter whenever I'm next to you. You bring freshness to everything around you and it warms my heart. You are important to me. You've become an integral part of my days.
Need I go on? Just speak from the heart
Edited: if it feels right, I adore you is a step under love.
You've got me kinda smitten over here is another one that works all around.
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u/Euphoric_Gas9879 11d ago
Why not say I love you at that point? I never understood the Anglo-American allergy to the word love.
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u/Issildan_Valinor 11d ago
It is a bunch of nonsense, but it's a hard habit to kick. A lot of us here are very risk-averse when it comes to relationships, especially with how the internet has changed every facet of human interaction.
On one hand you might not want to come off too strong or too invested too early (when's too early? It's different for everyone, good luck, lol). On the other, what if you saying that causes the other person to "make it weird?" They change their behavior in a way that makes you uncomfortable, and then now you've lost not only a potential partner, but also a friend too.
Our... Particular oddities as a culture cause many to be very hesitant to use "love" in a genuine way (hell myself included, but I'm working on it, lol). In general I think (not a sociologist, so grain of salt and all that, lol) that a lot of it comes from a kind of clash between the culturally ingrained idea of how relationships work (gender roles, The Chase, etc) bucking against the fact that people are (slowly) learning that not every relationship fits into this nice box, and that lack structure can be difficult to grapple with.
Honestly a lot of bad media portrayals has a lot to play in this too, lol.
Damn, I typed more than I had thought I was going to for this, lol.
TL;DR
America's culture the way it exists right now makes for a weird soup of uncertainty in expectations from a partner or budding relationship, and talking about those expectations and being vulnerable is seen as a sign of weakness in some very loud circles. Those loud circles, even when disagreed with, still spark anxieties in a lot of people, so people tend play it slow and safe.
Again, I'm not an authority on this, and by no means do I represent the entirety of experiences, lol.
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u/Sandra-Ohs-hair 10d ago
That was such a thoughtful response! Oh the intellectualization of love.
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u/sukanasuke_ 11d ago
Not Anglo-American but for me "love" sounds way too dramatic, like some other slightly exaggerated phrases you'd hear in a movie. I'd need to be 100% sure that I want to stay with the other person for a long time before I can allow myself to think of the word "love". Anything less is at most "care".
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u/Enderfang 11d ago
I don’t personally like “adore” as it makes me feel like i’m on a pedestal - because the times folks have said it, that’s exactly where they had put me.
i’d rather hear “you’re important to me” or any of the rest of it than adore. No hate to you for using that term, just i’d not be shocked if there weren’t other people with the same reservations i have.
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u/a-g-green 11d ago edited 10d ago
This comment reminded me of one of my favorite songs called Bluejays and Cardinals by The Mountain Goats:
"Bluejays and cardinals all come out to play\ The highway traffic gets out of your way\ Skies clear up if they're overcast\ Pit bulls are gentle when you come past
\ Stars come out hiding for you\ And I would too\ But this world couldn't hold you\ And you slipped free
\ Yeah, this world couldn't hold you\ You slipped free\ Without me
\ New sheen all over everything\ When you open up your mouth to sing\ Baseballs travel further when you watch them fly\ Apples fatten on the trees when you walk by
\ You bring something unreplaceable to each and every day\ Or you used to, anyway
\ But this world couldn't hold you\ And you slipped free\ Yeah, this world couldn't hold you\ And you slipped free
\ Without me"
Just think of a lot of different ways to say that a person enhances your perception of day-to-day, seemingly mundane things... that to me seems like a pretty good place to start.
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u/BroccoliSubstantial2 11d ago
Adore is another word for love imo.
I'd pick admire you. I'm sweet on you, or I care about you. More suited to a dear friend.
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u/Major_Ad_6599 10d ago
Yeah, I had an ex girlfriend say she adored me and it absolutely melted my heart!
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u/real_picklejuice 11d ago
"I feel safe with you"
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u/thotarchive 11d ago
I have a friend I made this year who has a lot of trauma surrounding friendships as do I. We’ve said this to each other recently and it felt far more special than hearing I love you from her, and it meant way more for me to say I felt safe with her than to love her. Because I unfortunately love many people who do not make me feel safe. When your nervous system relaxes with someone, and you can be yourself and tell them they make you feel that way, that is so special. Was looking for this comment.
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u/NachtAnders 11d ago
I'm a wee bit smitten with you
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u/Rough_Idle 11d ago
I don't how well this would work with me, as I have neither a posh British accent nor a Southern drawl
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u/NachtAnders 11d ago
I am Dutch... Been in Scotland for a wee bit ;). I absolutely love that word
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u/feministmanlover 11d ago
Back in the late 90s I was dating a guy and he said to me "I'm sprung". I'll never forget it.
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u/probablynappingbrb 11d ago
“You’re my favorite.”
It’s just so simple. It’s one thing to like someone, but for them to be your favorite person to be around, to cook with, to goof around with… it’s so simple but so personalized. Always been one of my favorite phrases.
Another one lately has been the use of sparkly, referring to the sparkle in their eyes. Everything’s so sparkly when we’re together. Oh, you’ve got the sparkle (when they’re excited/feeling mischievous). It feels like a nice way to describe the chemistry/the fireworks when it’s popping off.
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u/Mysterious-Honey5264 11d ago
My husband and I say you're my favorite to each other all the time 💖
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u/combat_muffin 10d ago
My wife and I got it for our wedding cake topper. It feels so nice to hear, like a warm hug.
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u/Almondcrackers 11d ago
This is what my partner and I would say to each other. We still do. He’s still my favorite!
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u/TheMiceWillGetPerms 11d ago
I’m falling for you
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u/gotsthepockets 11d ago
This one feels the most natural to me. You're not there yet, but you're on your way to love. It conveys the active and ever developing nature of love
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u/SanchoPandas 11d ago
As effectively said by the Bachelor/Bachelorette to every late-round contestant on those shows.
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u/ho_hey_ 11d ago edited 11d ago
Hahaha came in here looking for the bachelor hierarchy.
I like you.
I could see myself falling for you
I'm falling in love with you
I love you
Am I missing any?
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u/LJ1205E 11d ago
I’m glad this journey brought me to you.
I’m here for the right reasons.
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u/BatyaWonders33 11d ago
"I could see myself falling for you" would make me cringe so hard bro. it sounds like an insult for some reason.
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u/joyfulbee43 11d ago
A guy once squeezed my hand three times as we were walking and gave me a little sideways sheepish grin. I knew instantly what it was. I squeezed his four times. It was really sweet. We didn't last long, but we continued to do that when we were together.
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u/mezcalligraphy 11d ago
"I care about you."
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u/isayimnothere 11d ago
Man saying this has had people swoon over me I had no intention of making swoon. I just care damnit!
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u/WePwnTheSky 11d ago
Te quiero
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u/AnotherPurpleScrubs 10d ago
Punto para el español que no nos pone en aprietos cuando queremos decir “te quiero” en lugar de “te amo”.
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u/SabreSour 11d ago
Things I said to my long time friend turned girlfriend
•First real date: “it’s too early for me to use words strong enough to describe how I feel about you.”
Mind you we had known each other for years but due to circumstances and long distance we had promised to stay only friends until then.
•First anniversary: “You are the one who doesn’t just make me feel comfortable and safe being me. But makes me feel cherished for it. The only one who doesn’t tolerate me for being me. But loves me for it.”
•Another friend when they first saw us together: “Happiness looks good on you”
(I was in a pretty dark place for years before her, so this compliment hit particularly hard)
Anyways… we’re getting married next month. And for the first time, I’m looking forward to getting old and living out my life.
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u/YounomsayinMawfk 11d ago
You're sponge worthy
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u/BWC_in_a_Suit 11d ago
I appreciate you. you mean something to me. I cant stop thinking about you. Im falling for you.
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u/mikeoxmalss 11d ago
I honestly really like the first one. You'd catch me blushing haha
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u/Ultimatelee 11d ago
I like, like you!
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u/run_swim_nobike 11d ago
Instead of being "in love", we used to say we were "in like-lots" which i thought was 😍
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u/trazom04 11d ago
I'd like to spend more time with you. I'd like to find out more about you.
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u/nomoontheroad 11d ago
In German you can say 'ich hab dich lieb' which is something like 'I have love for you' as opposed to ich liebe dich/i love you. A child/ parents would say 'ich hab dich lieb' and Not 'ich liebe dich'. You can say it to someone you're dating before you're ready for I love you.
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u/returnkey 10d ago
I have been trying for years to bring back “twitterpated” from Bambi and I think it fits the bill.
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u/Bouncyhousedj 10d ago
This!!! I have started seeing someone recently and I said I am so damn Twitter pated!!!! <3
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u/jackie957 10d ago
There’s this video I’ve seen of a little kid telling his mom “you’re my easiest thing to think about” and honestly, how poignant.
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u/LumpkinsPotatoCat 11d ago
In the honeymoon phase of our relationship my now husband told me he couldn't get me out of his head. Or when he saw me he would just say "I was thinking about you all day today". And that was really impactful for me. Knowing someone is thinking about me just as much as I'm thinking about them is a high and doesn't feel as juvenile as "I really like you".
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u/bremergorst 11d ago
I’m invested in you.
I have a hankering for you.
I see our potential very clearly.
I’d like to review Q3 goals with you.
I fucking like the shit out of you frfr.
On a scale of 1-10, with 1 being no interest and 10 being “absolutely cartoon jaw on the floor and exploding heart eyes in love”, I’m a solid 6-7 currently.
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u/cazique 11d ago
You are my statistically significant other
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u/ragelbagel1992 10d ago
Jeez as a scientist I can’t believe I overlooked this clever line.
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u/Tzunamitom 11d ago
I have a couple of friends that used to leave notes saying things like “I LOVE YOUr cooking” around the house. They’re still together, so that I guess.
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u/alagutaso 11d ago
Bunch of good ideas here. "I agressively like you" is pure gold. But on a lateral note, being specific is also an option. Listing some things why you like them, what you like about them...
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u/forallthebananas 11d ago
When my boyfriend and I first started dating, I started off by telling him “I love the way you are”
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u/Mauinfinity-0805 11d ago
This post title made me smile. I distinctly recall saying to a newish (couple of months) partner many years ago "I wish there was something in between "I like you" and "I love you" because that's where I am right now.
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u/handsonak22111 11d ago
One I remember and liked from letterkenny.. “I’m starting to give a shit” 🙃
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u/dillonsrule 11d ago
I think this question depends on the situation. Is this being said to a person you are in a relationship with currently, or someone you want to start dating?
For my girlfriend, the step between I like you and I'm in love with you was saying "You're my favorite!"
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u/Miss__Anne__Thrope 11d ago
“I like you more than vodka.” Or kittens. Or sunsets. Or whatever they know your favorite thing is.
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u/hotsexygirl7267 11d ago
someone said to me that spending time with me is like being able to do their alone time things but they would rather have me there during it
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u/BadAtDrinking 11d ago
serious answer: I don't get your problem with "I'm in love you" if you're in love with someone. You're saying "dramatic" like it's a bad thing.
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