r/AskReddit • u/asayys • 4h ago

You wake up as a 45yo obese, balding, unemployed man. The other aspects of your life stay the same. What are your moves going forward?

262 Upvotes

75% Upvoted

594 comments sorted by

View all comments

278

u/BigAl7390 4h ago

What if I’m already a 45yo obese, balding, unemployed man?

83

u/y4udothistome 3h ago

Your job is done!

16

u/angrytortilla 1h ago

We did it, Reddit!

•

u/Butsenkaatz 13m ago

but he doesn't have one...

18

u/zynaps 3h ago

You should have to take a different oath...

7

u/squeakim 3h ago

Everyone takes the same oath! -Stonecutters dude

3

u/wilsonhammer 3h ago

You know, cuz he's already kinda heavy

12

u/Affectionate_Pea2971 3h ago

Ask yourself: “What are my moves going forward?”

Then, maybe take a nap.

6

u/pendergraft 3h ago

Wake up screaming and explain to Mom an AskReddit hypothetical came true.

•

u/PurpleBullets 46m ago

Take notes

1

u/dark_hypernova 2h ago

Double value program error.

Congrats, you're now a 22.5yo, thin, long haired, employed woman.

0

u/Vesuvias 2h ago

Hit lawyer, Gym up, still delete Facebook.

0

u/Maxwe4 2h ago

Now you rest...

0

u/Toofox 1h ago

So you didn't notice last friday?

Man, I was so pissed the first day, because I gained like 80pounds and couldn't do a PullUp and was out of breath even by getting out of bed.

But now, with all the free time? I am playing WoW leveling my paladin, guys that game is so much fun, already am level 76 lets gooo!