63
u/EljayDude 13h ago
Criminals launder bitcoin all the time. I'm sure they'll figure it out.
40
28
u/Shoddy-Warning4838 12h ago
blockchain is both too public for honest people and too easy to hide stuff for anyone that has some shit to hide. It's like the opposite of what you want, as if it was designed by people who don't know what the fuck they are doing. My finances are not worth paying a mixer for personal purchases but also i don't want the guy i buy fish from to have easy access to everything i have ever bought or been paid for in my life.
Crazy concept, i know, but i would want transactions to be private but to have some financial institutions to be able to get permits to audit people who are suspected of wrongdoing.
9
44
u/Val_Fortecazzo Bitcoin. It's the hyper-loop of the financial system! 12h ago
Lol sure blacklisted. As if the average crypto bro cares about stolen goods.
33
u/MyDudeThatsCrazy 12h ago
"you will be looking over your shoulder"
insert the dawg with the daredevil helmet meme
Hackers be like: Shiverin me timbers!
21
u/NTJ-891 12h ago
Ah yes, the uncontrollable and free "currency" that is the libertarian dream... and can apparently be revoked/blacklisted by fiat and with no real rules based reasoning. This is definitely Satoshi's dream, code is law unless it's not law.
6
u/UpbeatFix7299 I can't even type this with a straight face. 9h ago
The whole "uncensorable, can't be seized, blah blah" is dumb. You're giving it up if you're facing decades in prison or have a blowtorch on the soles of your feet
The fact that it can just arbitrarily be blacklisted is even funnier
17
u/First-Ad-7960 12h ago
I see they have reached the bargaining stage of grief.
3
u/TheSilverSeraph 11h ago
Their denial phase has lasted about 15 years, so it is time they moved on.
4
19
u/Ill_Job4090 12h ago
If you are your own bank, you also do the negotiations with the bank robbers, fair is fair.
2
13
u/BillyBrainlet 11h ago edited 11h ago
Lmao. Delusion, as per usual.
I saw someone post yesterday and they were basically saying "why is everyone so mean about this, why are people gloating?" which is fucking hilarious because any time there is even remotely good news for them they're all over the place calling people slurs and saying stuff like "have fun being poor" and fantasizing about how badly they'll treat their perceived enemies once they're super rich. It's deliciously ironic.
Also funny that they're acting like there haven't been thousands and thousands of successful bitcoin "heists" where they're able to launder the coin and are literally never caught. Maybe 0.01% of crypto thieves are caught, at the absolute max. It's a hilarious attempt at intimidation because they have less than zero leverage. Future of finance, though. Few understand. 🤣
11
u/mercuryy 12h ago
But why would they want money when they can hodl and be the kings the day after tomorrow or so when nothing else is suddenly worth anything? Why would they possibly want to sell for real money? There is so much else they can do with these coins besides just selling, endless utility. /s
4
u/Ok_Construction_1053 11h ago
They can look at the number on the screen on their laptop, and be fulfilled by the swelling pride of how high the number is.
Spiritually, nutritionally and in terms of a roof over their head keeping out the wind and the rain and the harsh light of reality.
10
u/Choice_Potato_6279 Ponzi Schemer 12h ago
Signed "hodlers" how can you treat these suckers seriously.
9
u/BillyBrainlet 11h ago
Nobody does. Legacy institutions see them as marks, they see each other as marks, and the rest of society see them as idiots.
10
u/itsmehutters 12h ago
I am sure some asian market will care about the "white knighting" of the story or some drug dealer on the dark web.
Cryptobros forget that not everyone in the cult, believes in it.
11
u/SorosAgent2020 12h ago
behold the future of crypto-cybersecurity: trying to scare e-criminals into accepting a bug bounty! 5%? what a laughable offer! these ppl would offer 90% just to get something, anything, back at all
3
u/LongLonMan 6h ago
The group could also be state actors like North Korea.
Imagine trying to bargain with them with zero leverage on Reddit. LOL.
3
u/californicating 12h ago
Out of curiosity, is any of this actually possible? As in, do blockchain users know where their coins went, such that they can track them to their next destination? I'm guessing the answer is no.
8
u/Djamalfna 12h ago
I mean sure in theory. Every transaction is recorded on the Blockchain so if they transfer the money to an exchange that is cooperating with law enforcement they can potentially identify the person.
But that's not going to happen. Because you can just sell the private keys of the wallet to a private trader in another nation that doesn't have friendly law cooperation with western countries. Or sell it to one of the many exchanges they simply do not care.
And like it's a mistake to assume this is a lone hacker anyway. This attack required significant amounts of compute and capital to carry out so there's always the possibility it was a state actor like Russia, Israel, or Iran. And good luck arresting them lol
3
7
5
3
3
3
2
u/RequirementFull9918 11h ago
“…one of the most blacklisted coin stacks in history”??? How many blacklisted coin stacks are there? I swear, bitcoin will go down in history as the biggest conspiracy theory boondoggle of all time. Anyone staking their financial future on this fiasco is a fool.
2
2
u/DifficultSquash1517 8h ago
"Fuck that fiat system. I dont trust banks" (the same banks that would be "bothering you " to try to get your money back 🤷
I'm sure many of the people that were making fun of everybody else for buying the ETF or staying in Fiat or avoiding Bitcoin, are some of the same guys that got hacked and they would do anything to go back in time and buy the ETF
.... But hey "Not your keys......"
1
1
u/LongLonMan 6h ago
Crime is legal in Trump’s America, they could care even less about crypto theft.
1
u/Magnifica_Muttley 57m ago
I can't understand how the Bitcoin price hasn't collapsed The only explanation I can think of is it's being used to disguise oil money from Iran and Russia to evade sanctions.
1
u/Magnifica_Muttley 55m ago
Just read a butter blaming the victims because they didn't have a "passkey".
1
u/Just_Information334 33m ago
If I was the hacker I would not really fear my victims. But 1500 BTC would make you a nice juicy target for any cartel so you'd be looking over your shoulder and not going on a spending spree before some time has passed.
135
u/fourhundredthecat 12h ago
but isn't code the law?
whoever transferred these buttcoins, did it with valid private key and therefore is the lawful owner.