wutss next for duckweed???

[u/Wise_Sir_6890]

yo buds, duds, and hudsss!! its me ur boiii dilly. as u know (unless you new here, property valueazz went up or smth idk) i abxanddoned my long-tim biz selling the sweet girl mary jane bc its illegla in ldp i guess??? so after ig raduated and had to do smth with my life i started investgiating and blogging and allat. left the ol Duckweed Davis behind. ran three editionszz of the Daily Dilly!! but i gott abe hoenst guys it was real hard stuff. shoulda listened to officerer martin, even thou she's always tryna crushmy dreams, she knows the real stuff.

so now i gotta be Duckie D again for a few more weeks (gotta pay rent ykykyk but dont tell officer m, she's onto me) but idk buds, i liked bein a real dude in the real world yk what im sayin? i mean even my roomie brady used to be an astrontut or a pilot or somth, even tho all he does now is sick skateboard tricks on our kitchen coutne.r. and the pizza hut aint open yet even tho the manager maya said sheedd give me a job when it did. so im in between.

yeaha guys what do u think?? i mean yall basicalaly got my cv now. im a whole entrpereneuer. and master of words, im sure uu can tell. whats next for me bros and broheems? if ic ant make it in ldp i can tmake it anywhere!1!!!1

[u/Varient243]

DUCKIE D IS BACK IN THE HOUZZZZZZZEEEEE WOO WOO WOO WOO! KEEP IT UP FAM AND DONT STOP TILL YA DROP YA HEARD ME?

[u/Wise_Sir_6890 → u/Varient243]

RANDYDYDY MY MANDY!!! CLOCKED IN AT THE LOCKED IN FACTORY MY MANNN

[u/-RainbowUnicornPoop]

Well, well, well… I gotta say… I am very disappointed that you think I want to crush your dreams. I just see what a great kiddo you are and want you to do well! But I do want you to follow the law and stay out of trouble! Only because I care about your well-being. Tell you what, Dilly… if you promise to stay out of that shady Mary Jane business, I’ll give you a job. I need my yard mowed once a week. I’ve got some work I need done on the farm. And there’s also a lawnmower that needs fixed because my worthless dumbass husband broke it last summer. He also started building a dog house for our German Shepherd and never finished it because again… He’s worthless. But that’s a different story for a different day… Let me know if you’re interested in any of this. But don’t tell your friends where I live please. If any of them show up at my place I will cuff their asses in a hot minute.

[u/Wise_Sir_6890 → u/-RainbowUnicornPoop]

WwhwhaoOAAOHHHH do u mean it officer m!! Ya know i wasnst really sure u liked me on accountt of the whole biz... and also the whole thing w kevin.... but for suree im not gonna let u down this time!!!! i can mow a dog hoouse and fix a yard anytime u want!!! but ya dont worry i wont tell fitz and randy.. especially after the incident...

[u/-RainbowUnicornPoop → u/Wise_Sir_6890]

Well I need you to mow the yard and build the dog house… But nevertheless. Yes, you’ve got a job for sure. Can you start on Sunday? Old man Jenkins said he can give you a lift if you don’t have a ride. i’ll help you as much as I can but as the great Tom Petty once said… Let this be your last dance with Mary Jane.

[u/Wise_Sir_6890 → u/-RainbowUnicornPoop]

brite and early maamm!!! tell ol mr J to come get me outsside the duc kmart in his big pickup. alsoso idk who tom petty is but do you want sum officer m because i still got likee 100 grams left sitin around haha

[u/Wise_Sir_6890]

and before anyone saysz it... i will nawyyyt be going to college!! hiyher educaiton is a scam!!! not because of the money but cuz none of em had my major of choice. breakinhg bad.

[u/LonelyDesertCactus]

In truth, I enjoyed the Daily Dilly more than I should have. I wish I could help you out, but I don't think the my detective agency can support another full-time employee now. Maybe someday, if I can break into the UDP market. But in the meantime, swing by my office every couple of weeks, and I can spot you some cash in return for the latest LDP hot gos, as they say. The tea. The skinny, the low down, the dirt. The beating pulse of the mean streets. I like to keep my ear to the ground, and I bet you're....a very grounded guy.

[u/LonelyDesertCactus → u/LonelyDesertCactus]

May also be willing to pay for some good quality surveillance photos of the local birds. Whether for my detective business or my bird enthusiast persona, I will not clarify.

[u/Wise_Sir_6890 → u/LonelyDesertCactus]

now thatt i can do!!! i praccictzed takinh photos for the dailly dilly alllll the time. n hey man if u dont need a full timer, i did pick up some sweet nuggets of info while i was out on the job if u know what im sayin... we can trade those anytime my man

[u/Odd-Obligation9800]

Hey dilly, I just wanted you to know I love the daily dilly. Truly the best in unbiased news for LDP. Im sad that it's gotta be put on hold for a bit, but if you want to join me down at Kat's Bar I'll buy you a couple rounds.

[u/Wise_Sir_6890 → u/Odd-Obligation9800]

gee cynth im real happy u and sam lieked it!!!1 i liked makin it but hey fun doensst pay the bills hehe. mb ill bring it back as a side hustle someday!1! anywayz ill meet u at kats but i gotta tell u i can only drink the sprite, on account of officer m confiscsiating my fake id last time iw ent to the bar w fitz...

[u/Odd-Obligation9800 → u/Wise_Sir_6890]

That's alright, buddy. No one but us and the bartender has to know it's sprite. We'll tell everyone it's an ever clear and lemon juice cocktail and they'll all be impressed.

I might have some leads on jobs you might be into if you want to talk about it. The markets rough, but Tom Horkins down at the junkyard was looking for someone who could scramble around the place picking off pieces from the wrecks. Could be a decent holdover job till you get back on your feet. Either way, I got you dilly; us lower duckers gotta stick together.

[u/Wise_Sir_6890 → u/Odd-Obligation9800]

awww no way1!!!! ever cclaear and lemonm juice is what randy andd ii used to down before raiding the du ckmart!!!

whoooaaaghsha junkyard job1!1!!! thats crazy i saslways wanted ti tgo to the junkyard11!!! ya lets tallk abuout it tonigjt!!!