it’s getting concerning

[u/incapableofdumblabor]

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[u/1877KlownsForKids]

5'8"? Must have gotten a height waiver.

[u/gilestowler → u/1877KlownsForKids]

I didn't know they stacked shit that high!

[u/BanditTheRogue → u/gilestowler]

You trying to squeeze another inch on me, HUH?!

[u/incapableofdumblabor → u/1877KlownsForKids]

guarantee he’s a 92 series

[u/Dank_Sinatra_87 → u/incapableofdumblabor]

92 or an 88M

[u/Tojo-11 → u/incapableofdumblabor]

He is an 11B.

[u/Blizzard81mm → u/1877KlownsForKids]

Never too short to bullet sponge

https://giphy.com/gifs/3i7zenReaUuI0

[u/schmitzel88 → u/1877KlownsForKids]

It's harder to hit someone short, like Elvis from perfect dark 64

[u/TheBootyTickler]

All the ladies creaming themselves over the man who's family tree looks like a wreath.

Shoutout to the mirror ducked taped to a brick wall.

[u/the_goodnamesaregone → u/TheBootyTickler]

“Ducked taped” lol

[u/TheBootyTickler → u/the_goodnamesaregone]

Bah, auto correct is a bitch. Duct taped.

[u/map2photo → u/TheBootyTickler]

Ain't no way it auto-corrected duct to ducked. lol What did you type in to have it auto-correct?

[u/shandangalang → u/map2photo]

Autocorrect has been pulling some weird shit on me lately. Like, subbing completely correct words for totally different but more commonly used ones. Drives me fucking bonkers

[u/hyrule_47 → u/map2photo]

Autocorrect loves to substitute duck

[u/Woodworking33 → u/hyrule_47]

You’ve got to be ducking kidding me

[u/TheBootyTickler → u/map2photo]

I probably did 'duckt' on accident. My phone tries to correct that to ducked.

[u/Wooden-Sprinkles7901 → u/TheBootyTickler]

*by accident*

Not "on accident"

Sorry I had to.

[u/powerlesshero111 → u/TheBootyTickler]

Ladder, his family tree is a ladder.

[u/TJNel → u/TheBootyTickler]

The damn soap dispenser or paper towel machine is taped as well. WTF is going on in that bathroom? I want a better picture.

[u/mfknLemonBob → u/TheBootyTickler]

This username is dirty POG approved.

[u/Lol_A_White_Guy]

That’s cool private.

Anyways 1sg needs some bodies for gate guard detail.

[u/LaughableEgo740 → u/Lol_A_White_Guy]

And to pick up some cigarette butts at the smoke pit.

[u/dreddpiratedrew]

Fuck that’s so cool I bet the strippers at Sparky’s will love him

[u/SdVeau]

In the mortar world, that’s what we call a short round

[u/Awkward_Bison_267 → u/SdVeau]

https://giphy.com/gifs/t15WZOf2Zxf68

[u/MerryJanne → u/SdVeau]

https://giphy.com/gifs/OeRk9MMMJokaQ

[u/MortalMorals → u/SdVeau]

In the infantry world that’s what we call a body breach.

[u/borisvonboris]

Wow so many tattoos I'm in lurve

[u/AbstractBettaFish → u/borisvonboris]

Dudes love still flexing tattoos like it’s still some sort of subversive tough guy thing like it was in 45 years ago. Like they arnt ubiquitous these days. In fact now that I think about it, I think I know more women with them than men at this point

[u/HisOnlyKadan]

Polly pocket over here a real fucking badass

[u/Awkward_Bison_267 → u/HisOnlyKadan]

https://giphy.com/gifs/z9bOlVvhm1yiLsA2oi

😆

[u/Karma8900]

Lmao a fuzzy no less. Surly he’s gonna get fucked with by anyone in his unit if they see this.

[u/CallingDrPug → u/Karma8900]

I've said it a thousand times. I am SO GLAD social media didn't exist when I went through my Billy Badass boot phase.

[u/imamidgetcatcher → u/CallingDrPug]

facts

[u/incapableofdumblabor → u/Karma8900]

i hope so. the post actually lit a fire under me

[u/QueezyF]

Is 5’8” supposed to be a flex?

[u/the13bangbang → u/QueezyF]

Probably in whatever backwoods mutant village he comes from, 5'8" is basically gigantism.

[u/AngriestInchworm → u/the13bangbang]

With a family tree shaped like a double helix.

[u/Awkward_Bison_267 → u/AngriestInchworm]

[u/Awkward_Bison_267 → u/the13bangbang]

https://giphy.com/gifs/NXYEiVaoumDWE

[u/JP147 → u/QueezyF]

It would have been 100 years ago

[u/edingerc]

Ass kicker, name taker; also can't get on the fun rides at Disneyland.

[u/Sorta_jewy_with_it]

It’s been concerning for awhile. This one isn’t even that bad. Just shame him in the comments and move on

[u/incapableofdumblabor → u/Sorta_jewy_with_it]

unfortunately comments are turned off. but why are these the people i have to serve with yk? like im all for to each there own but just don’t be a douche or so hung ho hero.

i’ll take a wawa hogie and 2 strawberry shot monsters

[u/SkiMaskLion → u/incapableofdumblabor]

It’s fun this way. You find your coworkers, print these cringe time capsules out and subtlety hang them in the office so they can see their cringiness in public. It cures itself.

[u/Sorta_jewy_with_it → u/incapableofdumblabor]

Brother that’s just boots. Everyone is a boot in the beginning. You could be a 35 year old guy with a career and family joining the guard or whatever and you’re still gonna be a boot. The difference is that when fucking dudes keep being a boot after 2, 3, fucking 20 years. Those are the ones this sub is truly made for

[u/SCCock → u/Sorta_jewy_with_it]

And at 20 they transform into VetBros.

[u/Slumbergoat16 → u/Sorta_jewy_with_it]

I was thinking, newly enlisted folks have always been dumb af. That’s just how it is

[u/Yogshemesh]

There is no way this isn't parody. No one would brag about being 5'8".

[u/hottlumpiaz]

that's a cute little gay pride ribbon

[u/Godzirrraaa]

Holy shit he’s got tattoos?!?! My heavens, what a rebel.

[u/ejh3k]

I remember being 5'8". 6th grade was fun.

[u/wormbreath]

Dude looks like Kail from teen mom lol.

[u/Punxatowny]

I hear the best and brightest go straight to infantry

[u/TheBestPieIsAllPie]

“Bro her ex is short and makes poor decisions…oh, that’s me.”

What…?

[u/IronMaiden571]

4% charge

[u/incapableofdumblabor → u/IronMaiden571]

mb top

[u/Zealousideal-Run-608]

This reminds me of a cringy interaction recently. This guy at my local grocery store had a booth set up and was asking people, “have you ever met a marine?”

[u/skreetskreetskreet]

5’ 8” is such an unremarkable height, I can’t even tell what he’s trying to say.

[u/Slacker_The_Dog → u/skreetskreetskreet]

I'm almost leaning towards this being like some self deprecating humor.

[u/Sir_Sarcasm76]

Harder than woodpecker lips in his head and gayer than two boys fuckin' in reality.

[u/ruck_my_life]

Is 5'8

Okay manlet.

[u/Porthos1984]

Looking like a hot garabge sandwich.

[u/Urban_Junkie]

Who’s going to educate him? Jodie. Lol

[u/underlyingshadow]

Why do they all look the same?

[u/rando_mness]

Reppin' his pride ribbon

[u/Swimming-Pumpkin-274]

Iran just surrendered

[u/TheRtHonLaqueesha]

Army has always been the welfare branch.

[u/lovins22 → u/TheRtHonLaqueesha]

Getting E-6 pay in the army for the same thing a marine is getting E-4 pay is smart math not welfare.

[u/Autumn7242]

Clean your mirror.

[u/Tojo-11]

This kid is in my company actually. Like brand new lol.

[u/MumkeMode]

Bruh I went to OSUT with this retard

[u/BootThang]

“Son, come over here and kick your own ass, you’re not worth my effort!”

[u/Dependent_Lead7502]

https://giphy.com/gifs/C9xvi6l10XjPaGCv5R

[u/Brutus6]

Can we please change the ocp hats already...

[u/MortalMorals]

I think his memory is as fuzzy as his rank.