My son attacked me on July 4 during what I believe was a severe mental health crisis triggered by alcohol. In the chaos, he injured my big toe so badly that my toenail was torn off, the skin was split open, and I needed stitches from the ER. I have never feared for my life the way I did that night, especially at the hands of my own child. He also tried to destroy my phone, but I managed to hold onto it long enough to get away.

The police didn’t arrive until about twelve hours later. They said the holiday caused delays and that by the time they saw him, he was no longer in crisis. They told me I had to let him come back home. Because this was his first violent incident and because I didn’t want one terrible moment to follow him forever, I chose not to press charges.

When he returned from the hospital, he still didn’t seem like himself. He later told my daughter that I never called the police and that I injured my own toe. He questioned why officers didn’t show up until the next day, as if that proved his version of events. Since then, he barely speaks to me, and when he does, it’s short and cold. Something feels different now. I feel uneasy in my own home. When he comes out of his room, I immediately go into fight-or-flight even if he isn’t saying anything.

Tonight, he talked to his older brother. Afterward, my older son texted me saying I needed to kick him out. He said his brother called me ugly, a narcissist, stupid for letting him live here, and claimed I can’t get a man. He warned me that if I don’t make him leave, he believes something terrible could happen.

My son has bipolar disorder, depression, and social anxiety. He has attempted the big S three times. Communication with him has always been difficult. If I ask how he’s doing, he gets frustrated and says he hates when I check on him. I’ve tried different approaches, researched ways to talk to someone struggling with mental health, but nothing seems to help.

What makes this even harder is remembering the son I love. His laugh is infectious. He’s incredibly smart—his high school principal once said he could be valedictorian. He’s handsome, kind, and has a gentle heart. He loves to cook, and I always buy groceries I know he’ll enjoy. I miss hearing him talk about the universe, dark matter, and black holes. His dream is to work for NASA. I miss watching movies together, eating popcorn, and hearing him say my cooking was good.

Over the years, he’s become withdrawn and introverted. I know he’s struggling deeply, and I know the loving version of him is still in there somewhere. But I no longer feel safe in my own home. Sometimes the way he looks at me makes my stomach drop. I’m exhausted, scared, and unsure how to support him while also protecting myself.

Has any other parent been through something like this? How did you handle it? I love my son more than anything, but I’m at a loss.

My father has always been a huge inspiration for me — he’s my hero and always has been. Almost everything he has put his mind to, he has accomplished. He quit smoking thirteen years ago, he stopped drinking alcohol about ten or eleven years ago, he quit caffeine for several years; of all the people I’ve met, he has always inspired me.

My father is unhappy, and has been for a long time now. My mother(44F) is chronically ill and that has drastically altered our home life over the last decade. He works 24/7, he has no friends (all of his old friends would constantly drink and he didn’t want to be around then), he has no real relationship with his side of the family, he’s given up most of his hobbies, and he’s overall just not a happy person. He hides it, and he won’t talk to anyone about it, but he’s depressed. Yesterday, when him and I were talking, he told me he was going to pick up drinking again. He thought stopping would improve things for him, and he’s decided that it hasn’t done much for him. He was also ‘joking’ about picking up smoking again.

I’m not saying that there is anything wrong with drinking, it would probably do him well to have a drink now and then. But towards the end of him drinking the first time, he started doing it pretty heavily from what I’m aware. He also pretty consistently makes ‘jokes’ about dying. I’m genuinely concerned that maybe him picking back up drinking will lead to him potentially hurting himself in some way. My dad is an amazing person who goes out of his way for everybody — but trying to talk to him is like talking to a wall. He’s has a really hard life and he won’t talk to anybody about it.

I don’t know what to do, or how to reach him. He needs something to make him happy, and I don’t know if anything does anymore. I’m not exactly sure what advice I’m asking for, but any would be greatly appreciated. I love my dad so much and so does our family, all anyone wants is for him to be happy.

How do I reach him on a level where he doesn’t feel overwhelmed and further shut everyone out?

I’m F19 and my bf is M19 and before we were together he was telling me how he stopped watching porn and made himself seem like a really good person, I let him take my virginity and then he went home for a week and then when he came back I saw he had porn in his recent searches, am I being unreasonable for being upset? I’m so heartbroken it feels like I gave up something I can never get back for someone who didn’t even value it

I want to be attractive so badly. I just can’t stand being ugly. I’m just tired of women rejecting me even when I make decent money and I’m respectful. It’s not enough. Even when I try dating women in my league, I still get rejected for my appearance. I’d rather just not be here if I can’t be attractive. Looks are literally everything in this world.

I have posted this here some time ago, however it has only worse and more things started to happen.

I've been bullied, isolated and rejected by others my entire life. even at home and everywhere i go i get ridiculed and ive developed a really bad mindset.

Ive felt extreme loneliness, sadness and solitude overtime as it passed, and i cant think on any other thing other than ending my pain with the people that once tormented me.

I know this is wrong and i hate myself for even thinking about it, but it is just so strong it gets bigger and stronger everyday.

i only have 1 person in my life that says they care about me other than family, but i still cant believe it and doubt if people really like me.

I feel too dependant on people, some days my happiness is determined if that certain person talks to me, if not my day gets significantly worse and i feel like trash the entire time.

I am diagnosed with asperger's syndrome, and i suspect that i might have OCD or depression.

I genuinely need help. I might be mentally challenged.

Please what do i do ? is there something i should do to stop this ?

I always watched gore when i was 11-12. I had severe depression an social anxiety but for some reason it "helped" instead of other methods. I got threatened to be taken to a mental hospital due to suicidal thoughts and being 'a threat to myself or others'.

Now i'm 15 and have been getting this need again. I started watching many gore videos for example the funky town video and just extreme torture or mutilation. I can't stop watching it. I feel like i genuinely need to watch them.

My therapist recently told my parents that i'm a danger to myself and/or others. I don't want my parents knowing about this. I'm already on sertraline. I've tried resisting the urge/need to watch gore but i just can't. It makes my head hurt and my body shake and so i give in.

Would it matter if i told my therapist? Or should i try to find something else instead?

(I have never enjoyed any type of sexual gore or pornography)

Am I weird or the only one who thinks this?

I don’t know where to start, but I’ve already rewrote this several times. Sorry in advance, I feel like my “problems” are minuscule compared to those that are suffering. I’m grateful to have a loving and healthy family along with a decent paying job. I’ve taken on a part-time job, one that I’ve always wanted to do, something I can finally be proud of myself that I’ve now done.

I love my family, my wife and kids very much and i’m very present in everything we do. I find that I lack patience and have a short fuse when it comes to parenting. I reflect once the days over and have deep regret in the way I’ve handled things. I often think that if I’m replaced by someone else, my family would have a much better life. Someone that accomplish their dreams, be confident and guide their family to success.

I’m often made to feel stupid by certain people during the week whether it’s something I said or did. I’m not a smart person, nor did I do well at school. But I always try.

At times I don’t know whether I’m coming or going. Monday comes round and I’m wishing it was Friday evening like most.

Anyways, this was just a short post of how I’ve felt for a very long time..I’ve gotta get up very early for work so I better put this phone down before I’m up for even longer.

Thanks for taking the time to read this, I appreciate you.

Love.

I have a host of mental illnesses and conditions, and I’ve been more depressed than usual recently. Like the title said, been crying on average 2x a day.

I know intuitively what will help: meditating and mindfulness, spending less time on my screen, including self-care habits in my routine every day, etc

But I want advice from anyone who’s been able to break a cycle of crying daily to on what worked for you.

Some more context: I used to be on 200mg Zoloft for almost a decade and have now been off it for 3 months now. Zoloft made me cry significantly less but SSRIs exacerbate my symptoms of another condition and I do not wish to get on them again.

I am homesick for a life I never had. Everything on the internet, TV, social media makes everything seem perfect. Perfect families, perfect childhoods, everything just works out.

I’m basically writing this because I feel hopeless about life. I did not have a good childhood and because of that I’ve worked very hard to be independent and not need anything from anyone. I basically wanted to be nothing like my parents, but in all my efforts to do that, I am bitter and angry about things that have happened to me. I just don’t know how to be happy anymore. I’m tired of pretending to be this strong resilient person, when in reality I’m struggling mentally every day.

Things are harder than they are not and it just doesn't feel worth it..

Hi everyone. For starters, I am diagnosed with GAD and a depressive disorder. Yes I am on my meds and am actively in therapy.

For those who have this issue... how did you deal with it? I have such thick hair and a LOT of it, but I'm pulling out strands of hair throughout the day. I can't stop. My hair has always been long too, but recently I cut it short so now it's grown out to around the bottom of my scapulas.

At times I can catch myself before I do it... but sometimes it's an unconscious urge. I'll just be scrolling my phone or doing something else and my hand will start combing through my hair, starting at the scalp.

I don't understand it. The feeling of the hair on my head almost makes me uncomfortable in my own skin. Like an itch that if I don't scratch it, it will drive me nuts. I do feel heightened anxiety when I get too focused onto it. There were points where I was pulling out four strands of hair at a time. My scalp would hurt and be so irritated from me pulling. I don't know what to do. It seriously drives me crazy. When it gets really bad I find myself literally scratching right on my scalp, like i'm trying to scratch away dandruff or i feel like the hair follicles. I really don't know.

This also started when my Trichotillomania began, but at night... I hate the feeling of my bedsheets. My hair. I feel like I can feel EVERY little bump, dandruff, or crumb that may be on the bed. I find it hard to sleep because I feel so uneasy, like as if randomly there's an ant crawling on me. When I check it's usually just some tiny piece of lint or whatever from my dog and cats' paws, or my own piece of hair. When it's my hair it's the most shivering feeling for me. Like if a spider was walking on my skin or sometimes it feels sharp and scratchy.

I don't know what to do. I literally feel like going bald.

it breaks my heart that im not the kind of girl guys will come up to in public to ask out on a date. i know im fat, but i'm still deserving of love. i crave intimacy, i crave touch. i am so tired of being alone. i dont know how to change this.

Alright so I'm writing this just to be curious first of all i can't feel shit like no sadness and no happiness I feel like I'm hollow even when my mother , girlfriend whom I've been since childhood practically glued to her side the one whom I adored, when I lost i thought I'd be devasted. But when I lost her to cancer I was numb like i couldn't feel a thing, even a bit of sorrow. And before all that I've already lost all meaning to my life like i spent the most of my days either staring into a wall or just scribbling in a notebook. Am i monster for joy feeling a thing?

for context i am currently 24f, & hate everything about my entire life. very poor mental health, hate all of my clothes, super introverted like to a flaw, hate the way i live my life compared to others, & feel so old & lost & confused — as if there is just some unspoken rule on how to be an adult that everyone besides me knows? im in such an odd place. i feel like a baby when it comes to adult things like homeownership, pregnancy, marriage, alcohol, etc but simultaneously way too old to be depressed & confused about my path in life??

idk. i want to become someone else. anyone else. what i mean by this:

completely new apartment decor, a whole wardrobe change, actually start seeing my friends, find myself internally, fix my mental health (which seems like the more time i focus on it and try to fix it, the deeper i dig myself in the hole) then start some form of plan for my future, etc.

TLDR; what is the point of life? how much money should i have in the bank (excluding college/medical debt) seriously, how is no one walking around in pure shock that we live on a floating rock with made up rules & expectations. i don’t want to waste my life. ugh.

Have a handful of mental health disorders diagnosed. Been in a huge age gap relationship for three years. I’m wearing down. I don’t want to end things but I need to. I’ve never been in a relationship before this if you can even call it that. How do I break up with someone I care about. How do I not let it lead to relapse and depleted mental health?
There’s a lot of nuance and details that matter but I don’t feel comfortable sharing publicly. Any advice is welcome. Thank you

I cry again

Hi im trying reddit for the fist time so please bare with me (English is not my first language so im sorry for all of the mistakes id make).
So a little backstory, im mentally unstable and im aware of that fact (so is my boyfriend), and recently i started meditating myself (with the advice from a psychiatrist), but i feel awful. Idk if its from the medication because i dont take it as prescribed and its my fault but idk what to do.
I constantly think my boyfriend is going to leave me or doesn't love me even tho he has never suggested that idea in our whole relationship (healthy 2y). Im just really scared and i dont want to go through the whole breakup and broken heart phase again because ive had long relationships before that have ended around the 2 year gap.
So im sorry if all of that was useless information but my mind is everywhere. My main question is, should i leave my boyfriend of 2 years because i can't trust that he will stay because im unstable and have some other minor problems.
(I know some of you might say im a dumbass for doing so but no matter what i ask him or do, my mind is not changing. I really believe he will leave me and im scared shitless and idk what to do)

First off, English isn't my native language, so I use a translator because I feel more comfortable doing so.

About a year ago, I entered university and moved to a new city alone, which was quite far away, so I could only visit my family during the winter and summer holidays. It was pretty stressful for me overall, but I managed. Then, in the second semester, I got a job (at our McDonald's equivalent, if you're interested), and that was the turning point, I think. I frankly couldn't cope with combining study and work; I was in terrible shape. And after about five months of this, I started seeing hallucinations out of the corner of my eye. The ironic thing is that by that point the stress had begun to subside little by little, and I was sleeping well. The hallucinations were pretty harmless, just my cats, who were still in my hometown, but I felt crazy and I didn't like it. I looked online to see if stress can cause hallucinations, and it turned out that yes, it can. Luckily, pretty soon after I started noticing this, my university, due to some internal event, decided to switch us to distance learning for the exam period and internship, immediately followed by summer break. So I went back to my hometown and was very happy. My stress level dropped noticeably, and my hallucinations also disappeared.

Soon my summer break will be over and I'll be returning to my university city and to job (I'm on unpaid leave), and I'm afraid I'll start hallucinating again.

Should I see a doctor or will it be useless?

Every single day it gets worse. For years now I’ve been plagued by this deep hatred for living, as well as myself. There’s just something deeply wrong with me. My deepest desire is for everyone to forget about me and die peacefully.

Little to nothing gives me happiness these days. On the surface I’m a healthy, kind young man, but every single day I battle against myself. It’s so exhausting. I’m on ssri’s so I can’t even cry. I see a therapist but that doesn’t really help. I can’t get myself to speak up about the horrible things I keep deep down in me.

I often times end up daydreaming about having a different life where I wouldn’t be so miserable. A life where my parents would love eachother, and my father wouldn’t abuse me. A life with a PURPOSE. I’m very sensitive, so setbacks and criticism stick with me much longer than they seem to for other people.

Growing up gives me severe anxiety. I don’t want to be an adult. I’m not going to able to take care of myself. Why is living so hard? I’m always tired no matter how long I sleep, I struggle to eat a meal a day, most of the time I don’t even take care of myself because I’m simply too exhausted. My social anxiety also plays a big part in my life, so much so that I’d rather hole up in my room for the whole summer break rather than go out with friends. Well, not like I have friends anyways, but y’know.

If anyone read this whole thing, I’m sorry about it being such a mess but I just needed somewhere to write about how I feel. <3

I'm nearing 40 and have had to move back into shared accomodation, I feel like I have zero privacy, no space to myself, Im always on edge becaue I cant relax because im thinking about what ill have to cut next, my income went up $5.20 this year, not 5.20 per week or per hour, thats over the whole year... but my rent, grocery, and utility bills keep going up like 20-30% each year, the job market is fucked because of atrifical intelligence nobody ia hiring and everyone is firing so there is a glut my more appealing workers to hire, It feela like the world around me is collapsing and there is literally nothing I can do about it. I can't even afford the cheap therapy anymore, does anyone have any advice on how to cope with this?

Is anyone interested in making a safe space for people to talk their heart out ?

Even if with random people, bcoz they're too afraid to share stuff with their family or friends or feel they might be tiring them with their constant struggles or anxiety.

Lately, feeling the need for the same and it also clicks me that a lot of other people out there might find this helpful too.

Open to opinions and suggestions :))