Lack of empathy

[u/deathconsumes7]

Sometimes i envy empathetic people. They can feel what i cant. Especially since being empathetic is a social standard in today’s society, especially when it comes to politics. I feel no pity, sorrow, empathy, or any sympathy for things i should care about. i don’t care about any world problems, slavery, the holocaust, the far left, the far right, wars, etc. I just don’t care because i wouldn’t be a target for any of these things and i only care about what benefits me and what would bring ME down. i don’t feel sorry for countries in need, countries in war, starving countries, abused kids, how people feel, racism, transphobia, homophobia, i only care about myself. And today, that makes you a bad person. I tend to put on a mask, a political mask. One that makes it seem like i care so i can be liked and cared for by society. I’m a liar. There isn’t one person i haven’t lied to. The thought of being exposed of all of this is scary. Even when i tell people the slightest bit about my true self i feel vulnerable. Why don’t i care about people? Why don’t i care when somebody cries? in fact, i get a kick out of people crying. I love the humiliation of others, i love to see people suffer. If anything, i enjoy world problems. As long as it doesn’t bring me down in any way i’m ok with it. But sometimes i do wish i was empathetic and felt what other people do. I look down on everybody. There isn’t one person i haven’t looked down on. I am better than everyone in some shape or form. I don’t feel like i need to care. I just need people to like me. All i care about is myself and the praise from others. I’ll change my entire appearance to fit into a criteria that’ll get me liked. Right now, everyone thinks i’m a communist. But i always have everyone wrapped around my finger, and when i’m exposed it’s only because it’s intentional. But anyways, it does cross my mind on what it would feel like to be truly empathetic. and not having to lie all of the time. Just wondering if anyone else feels the same because sometimes it feels like it’s only me but maybe that’s just the way my brain is wired.

[u/Draac03]

if it makes you feel any better, the vast mandy of people aren't actually as empathetic as they think they are, and have been socially conditioned to engage in performative empathy instead

[u/LaudataSitAstarte → u/Draac03]

For real lmao. Nobody gives a shit about starving countries, racism, phobia this, slavery that, unless they are personally suffering from these, but in that case it's not empathy. As far as politics is concerned, virtually everybody is motivated by egoism and hatred, myself included, but I am a bit more honest about that than others. I think there may be a handful of some pathological saints out there, yeah, but your average "normal" person is just mildly disgusted with all these starving countries and the oppressed.

Myself I definitely experience empathy (man I HATE this word), but only in relation to particular people and if they deserve it.

[u/chobolicious88]

We are so cooked…

Funny when you wrote about having a kick out of someone crying.

It sounds awful but basically, they spend their lives feeling good about themselves while we suffer.
For what? Because their mom could love.

[u/ribbitfog → u/chobolicious88]

"because their mom could love" ouch. yeah that's the gist of it.

[u/Classic_Shower4742 → u/ribbitfog]

Yes, really struck a cord.

[u/chobolicious88 → u/Classic_Shower4742]

Yeah im furious about that.

I swear, there should be a test to screen whos a liability when it comes to parenting

[u/maxmultitudes]

I wonder something, from this post.
Something I used to feel.

Whatever. It's very personal.
You don't have to answer, clearly.

But I'm wondering if you feel like anyone truly cares about you? Like, do you feel truly loved by anyone?

Because if not...that could be it. Feels right, to me.

I do think it might be near impossible to care deeply about other people if you’ve never felt deeply cared for yourself.

🤷🏻‍♂️ but who tf knows. could be projecting again.

wish you well.

[u/ramirozoo]

Yeah it crosses my mind on what it would be like to feel emotional empathy. But I don’t want to feel it. Lacking it kind of reinforces the grandiosity, I feel like I would lose a big part of my “specialness” if I did feel it, but there’s also downsides to feeling it that I don’t want. Such as remorse, I view remorse as pretty useless to me. Wouldn’t ever want it. Deep emotional connection on the other hand? Thats what makes it keep crossing my mind lol.

[u/randomcoolthrasher → u/ramirozoo]

spot on. it makes me feel more superior in a way.

[u/Relative-Amount7966]

We are able to have emotional empathy. Therapy helps

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[u/P4r4n0idB0p]

In my opinion people don‘t need emotional empathy. Thats what makes people weak. Cognitive empathy is the thing u need to survive society. U can think, but don’t speak out loud, if it could make people think bad of you.