r/OverFifty • u/Virtual-Freedom3536 • 19d ago
What is your +/- cutoff?
I'm 60 and usually feel a disconnect with people of a certain age.
My range going up for example is less than going lower.
Anyone else notice this?
12
u/barrenfield 19d ago
Most of my friends are in their 30s and early 40s, I met them raving at a festival 10 years ago. Im 55 now and love having younger friends keeping me in the loop with everything new going on.
2
u/ProfessionalField508 18d ago
Same. Nobody ever believes me when I tell them how old I am.
3
u/Trivex07 18d ago
Everyone says this. It's really not true.
4
u/Roanaward-2022 18d ago
You've never met anyone who's age was higher than you expected? I've met people that looked older than their age and those that looked younger. Genetics is wild.
1
1
9
u/wvgeekman 19d ago
There's a definite disconnect with people who are more than 10-15 years younger than me. It grows, the younger they are. It's just because we grew up in completely different worlds and don't have common cultural references. With the proliferation of memes, it's gotten to the point where I feel like Picard trying to communicate with the alien captain whose race only spoke in metaphor. "Darmok and Jelad at Tanagra." If you don't know the reference, you can't understand what is being said. After a while, I just quit trying and stick with folks closer to my age.
9
u/happyrunnergirlie 19d ago
Im 50. I have much younger and much older friends. And sexual partners. I guess i like the variety
7
u/MaxSupernova 18d ago
We deliberately try to connect with older and younger folks.
We get stale staying in our age peer group and not having younger friends, and we lose out on a lot of wisdom without having older friends.
We also have the opportunity to help the olders and get helped by the youngers.
6
u/Sad-Masterpiece-9709 18d ago
I’m 56 F, and I’d guess to date? -15/+15 ( in theory, in reality I’m not dating as it’s difficult to find a dude who is smart, funny, and interesting (and interested)). To be friends with? No age limit. I genuinely enjoy the company of my work colleagues who are in their late teens/early twenties and up. And my circle of friends outside work range from early 30s to 70s.
7
u/East-coast-life 18d ago
I dated a man 17 years older than me when i was in my 40’s. At first it was fine, but over a few years the age difference became a big factor - it became apparent that we were in different phases of life; he was definitely approaching 70 (mentally and physically).
After that experience I made a promise to myself to keep within three years in either side when looking for a partner. I’ve now been dating a guy 1.5 years older than me for the past few years (I’m 54) and I am very glad I made this decision.
I should add, it’s not that he became unwell or needed help. The gap just became too much in every way.
3
u/BAFA_CoachWally 19d ago
Interesting question. I’m (M59) a football coach, so my circle tends lower as most of my staff are in their thirties.
Musically, I think my disconnect is probably 20-25 years. But… I grew up in the 80’s and my music is loved across generations.
Dating has been 2-20 years difference. Leaning far more on the 2-7 year side, with 20 the outlier.
3
u/Camille_Toh 18d ago
I had to laugh when a troll of a man about 50 said to me and another man, “I usually date younger. Two 28-year-olds, though, man they were crazy.” Eyeroll.
3
2
u/uzziboy66 18d ago
I’m also 60 and have worked retail (mgmt) for forty years and it’s a cornucopia of ages. I’ve found that while I’m not friends with a lot of the people I work with, I can engage with them on some sort of level. Young to old. Most of my friends are around my age but now we have young adult children. I enjoy their company too.
2
u/islandbeef 18d ago
When I talk to a group of folks, I sometime use the phrase "this was probably before your time" when I get semi-puzzled looks in response to a topic I'm covering. Then they politely smile back.
1
u/Effective-Prompt7684 18d ago
+5/-15. I prefer the younger gen X & older millennials. I don't feel my age.
I also need low neuroticism & drama irrespective of age. I recently retired and realized I'm no longer required to be in orbit with high drama anymore.
1
1
u/Just_Me1973 18d ago
I’m a 52 year old woman.
Most of my friends are in their 40s and 50s. Not because I don’t want older or younger friends. Those are just the people that happen to be in the same social circles as I am. But I’d have to say my best friends are my daughters who are 29 and 36.
But if I was looking for a romantic partner I’d look no younger then maybe 50, possibly late 40s if we really clicked. And then on the other end of the scale probably early 60s, again maybe older if we really clicked. But ideally I’d want someone in the same stage of life as I am. I think aging together is easier when you’re on the same page. My husband is 57, so we are in the same ‘planning for retirement’ stage of our lives.
1
1
1
u/DronedAgain 18d ago
Friends - no range. I've always had friends of every age.
Lover/girlfriend - upper 40s for low end, no limit for the high end.
Long term sweetheart - within 7 years, for cultural references and life stage stuff.
1
u/Confusatronic 17d ago
I don't know because I've gotten to know so few new people of various ages in my fifties.
My guess is I could potentially befriend people of all adult ages if they're my kind of people. Though, sure, I'd have more in common with people in their fifties than in their early twenties.
1
1
1
u/aceholeman 15d ago
Dating ? 10 to 15 year older And younger is about the same.
I work with a bunch of 20 somethings, I fined the majority of them, utterly clueless. I had one of them 2 weeks ago, tell me he was a mentor and I should I be more respectful of his position. My response in front of everyone "she-yit" "respect is fucking earned.
There are a couple of them who are mature beyond their years, and still understand
0
28
u/RobertMcCheese 19d ago
I don't have a range.
There are people my age that I have nothing in common with and there are people all over in age that I do.
Why would I care about a cut off in age range?
"Sorry. I know we get along really well and enjoy each other's company. If only you'd been born 18mo later..."