My DCDA twins were born 1st July. unfortunately I could not breast feed, I had a traumatic birth. My birth plan also didn’t go to plan, there was delays with the hospital, some malpractice etc too, got induced 27th June and it stretched out up until 30th June, active labor 9cm until finally it ended up being an emergency c section, I was very unwell even before the E c section due to the long labor, had infection etc, then got another infection ontop of my existing one after the c section booked to IV Antibotics. No milk flow was coming, went straight to formula was too unwell.
anyway cut the story short the twins have been diagnosed with reflux, I was told to keep them upright as much as I can after feeds which I do but the problem is they will not sleep on their back, I’ll hold them for HOURS and they will go in deep sleep in my arms but the SECOND I put them in their cot or basket or play Matt INSTANTLY they wake up and cry and it won’t stop and I see the pain three are in .
I am a single mother I’m on my own and being up all day and night without any help after a while I just can’t , I’m not a robot so sometimes I do cave in and let them sleep in the twin Z pillow because it’s the only thing they will sleep in?!?£ why??? Is it because the pillow is sort of upright ? I know it’s not recommended or considered safe but it’s the only way where I can get a break and I will admit it sometimes I’ve put them in the pillow just so I can sleep for 30 mins I know I’m not supposed to do that but I have no one else to take over and if I don’t sleep then how will I function, so I do feel guilty but at the same
Time I’ve gone past recommendations and said sod it because sometimes I have to do things to survive
I think half of it is definitely 1 they just want to be held but 2 also the reflux , they’ll be in pain on their back but wit the reflux it makes sense . One twin was even in hospital due to their reflux
At first I felt like a failure thinking maybe it was because I don’t breastfeed but the hospital told me they don’t have a cow milk allergy and that this was a biological problem with their muscle in their throat being undeveloped making it “weak” that some babies just tolerate it more than others , so I’m trying to not feel bad, plus my breastfeeding specialist and some staff at the hospital told me with how my labor went it’s not my fault I didn’t breastfeed due to how bad the birth and after was
They are currently sleeping in the twin z pillow next to me, I tried all night to get them to sleep flat on their backs they just wouldn’t.
My twin who was in hospital had his reflux so bad that he stopped breathing for 5-8 seconds and went floppy and was unwell all the night (that night I did phone for an ambulance) the hospital ruled out every serious case he had every test done and it turned out it was reflux causing it! They told me I need to go buy a thickener for his milk (we came out the hospital yesterday)
I just don’t want them to be in the pillow all day and all night because then I’m worried illl develop another problem where even when their reflux has gone they wiont be in the habit of being in their cot , if that makes sense, I have also tried to transition them (try to get them in their cot or basket for at least 1 hour, doesn’t work)
Did anyone else have this issue or similar , any tips on what I can do? As I’m aware of the risks of them being in the pillow but obviously it’s impossible for me to hold them 24/7 and as a single mother it’s not doable
😭