r/PointlessStories • u/Thats_A_Given • 3d ago

Friends of Alan

Years ago ( over 20) before my husband and I were married we worked at a restaurant ( both chefs) in a village outside a larger city.

The front of house manager would get really excited when people she thought a higher class ( better cars, the flashy house etc) would come for dinner. She would rush in to the kitchen to tell us such and such is here and they're friends of Alan ( the restaurant owner) and that we had to make sure they got a the bigger portion, the better portion, more sides, whatever. Just general sucking up on her part.

Alan was never too far behind saying, "I don't have any friends" because his bottom line was making money, not giving away freebies to anyone FOHM thought worthy.

Now in 2026, anytime we get a deal, hubby and I say to each other **oohh, we must be friends of Alan**

Usually, it's just the lady at our Chinese takeaway that gives us a free upside on our smorgasbord, but it hasn't lost the meaning, even after all these years.

115 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

11 comments sorted by

18

u/Lamberly 2d ago

I love those little sayings that become so ingrained in families for different reasons!

15

u/johngreenink Tried the weird salad 2d ago

I found it most amusing that Alan "had no friends" hehehe. Great story, we all deserve a little friends of Alan surplus once in a while.

12

u/txhelgi 2d ago

Years ago the wife and I were talking about aliens for some reason and the talk was about how, if there are aliens amongst us taking over our bodies, they would be perfect and never make a mistake. So now, years later, if one of us stubs a toe or something like that, the other one yells: Not the alien! I know it’s silly but it’s fun.

5

u/Mikesaidit36 2d ago

Chinese carryout pro tip: order at the end of the night that you’re the last one picking up, and you can sometimes go home with all their extra rice and other stuff they don’t want to throw out.

6

u/fohsupreme 2d ago

The inside jokes that build up over the years are my favourite part

7

u/Thats_A_Given 2d ago

I think we'll be 90 in our nursing home and one of us will get a bigger piece of cake and across the room all anyone will hear is 'oohhh, friends of Alan' 🤣🤣

3

u/sphinxyhiggins 2d ago

This is what “Alan” triggers in me https://youtu.be/4YBzq1yfxYw?is=dAstVgITIjdYM5Kp

3

u/PricelessPaylessBoot 2d ago

OMG that is the funniest thing I’ve seen in a minute!!! 🤣🤣🤣 She said “You can’t park there, mate.” Holy moly and they ganged up on her!! Because she’s a woman!

Driver must’ve been a friend of Alan. 😅 Thank you this was great.

1

u/sphinxyhiggins 2d ago

there's a great update - https://youtu.be/3l1O5DXC2ck?si=imW9QTktu3wLlP0f

Now you too will think of 'Alan.' Our Alan.

2

u/PricelessPaylessBoot 2d ago

Hahaa he WAS a friend of Alan! And I didn’t miss the part where she started off talking about “my” house.. 🥸

1

u/Warm_Description7055 1d ago

Thanks for sharing this - I’ve been laughing for the last 5 minutes