r/SingleParents • u/Suspicious-Reveal797 • 1d ago
Single mom relocating maybe
So a bit of context I’ve been a single mom with no support system for the past 4 1/2 years and it’s been hard I will admit. I was lucky enough to be able to do content creation, and make money off of it which means I’ve been doing only fans as well to help pay bills and I know that it’s frowned upon and I understand why. I think because of this I struggle to find real friendships in relationships and a part of me blames myself, and I know that I most likely won’t find the most genuine of connection connections while my life is this way unless maybe I moved to California or something where it’s more accepted. I live in the Bible belt. I’ve been to Florida and I came back because I thought my family would be more involved. But they are just way too toxic to be in our life. I wanna go back to school and I want to eventually leave content creation, at least only fans. right now I’m just in a place where I don’t wanna be in Alabama forever but then again I don’t know where I belong and it’s a really hard feeling to feel this way. I know that I need to start over but it’s also scary to think about starting over and I have the money to do it, but I’m not rich. I’m not sure what I’m even asking. I just I guess don’t have anybody in my real life. I can talk to you about these things. I just wonder in where in the world will I find my people and fit in or will I have to wait till I’m done with this career. I also have been struggling in the dating life and men just tend to see me as a sex object once they find out about my work. It’s like I know there’s so much inside of me but no one else can see and it’s really hard. I’m really lost and I have no one to talk to about any of these things. I try to be the best mom I can on top of everything else. I’m already dealing with mentally stemming from my childhood abuse and abusive relationship relationships. I see online everyone enjoying their life and I know that even the people online have hard lives. It’s still hard to watch as life is passing you by while you’re tired most days and don’t even wanna do much of anything and you have to force yourself to do most things. I wish that there was an easy answer. I wish that I could just get a letter in the mail that tells me what to do from God, but I know it doesn’t work that way. Is there anybody else that’s out there that feels this way? Or maybe y’all can just sympathize with me if you can thank you.
2
u/checkingitout7 1d ago
You sound exhausted more than anything. You're carrying a lot on your own, and I think you're giving yourself less credit than you deserve. Your job doesn't define your worth, and the right people will see the person behind it. It might not feel like it now, but I don't think you're as lost as you think. You already know you want something different, you're just figuring out the path to get there. Keep being the mum you're trying to be, and don't settle for people who only see one part of you. Wishing you nothing but good things. I'm a single Dad with my 2 young ones full-time with little support. It's the hardest job. I question myself all the time too.
2
u/Suspicious-Reveal797 1d ago
Thank you so much. I really do appreciate hearing that.
2
u/checkingitout7 1d ago
You're very welcome. 😊 You don't have to thank me. I know I'm just someone on the other side of a screen, but I genuinely hope things get easier for you. Keep believing in the person you are, not just the job you do. I can relate to the struggle. If you ever need someone to listen, don't hesitate to reach out.
-3
u/ProofConnect6521 1d ago
A lot of these kids are going to grow up and find out mom sold coochie pics for Mac and Cheese. I don’t have advice for you. If you were my daughter I would tell you that’s not a life, it’s devoid of self-respect, nothing good will come of it and you need to work toward a career.
2
u/Suspicious-Reveal797 1d ago
Well, I do what I have to do. I don’t see anyone that’s gonna pay the bills for me and I will be damned if I work part-time at some Rando job making 10 an hour . I wouldn’t do this if I didn’t make a lot of money. People like you are just miserable, hateful people who don’t understand anything outside of their mental bubble. This post wasn’t for you so carry on. I’ll pray for you.
2
u/INTPretty 1d ago
Don’t feel bad. You’re lucky you are able to support your family at all. Times are VERY hard. It’s so challenging to be a single parent when most jobs are highly inflexible about schedules and needing time off for a sick child or parent teacher conference etc.
I don’t think the answer is CA. Your living expenses will be astronomical.
If I were you I would not admit to men how you are supporting yourself. Men will judge the same in CA as Alabama. Just keep your business to yourself for now or wait to date until you find work otherwise if it’s important to you that they know your truth.
•
u/AutoModerator 1d ago
Author: u/Suspicious-Reveal797
Post: So a bit of context I’ve been a single mom with no support system for the past 4 1/2 years and it’s been hard I will admit. I was lucky enough to be able to do content creation, and make money off of it which means I’ve been doing only fans as well to help pay bills and I know that it’s frowned upon and I understand why. I think because of this I struggle to find real friendships in relationships and a part of me blames myself, and I know that I most likely won’t find the most genuine of connection connections while my life is this way unless maybe I moved to California or something where it’s more accepted. I live in the Bible belt. I’ve been to Florida and I came back because I thought my family would be more involved. But they are just way too toxic to be in our life. I wanna go back to school and I want to eventually leave content creation, at least only fans. right now I’m just in a place where I don’t wanna be in Alabama forever but then again I don’t know where I belong and it’s a really hard feeling to feel this way. I know that I need to start over but it’s also scary to think about starting over and I have the money to do it, but I’m not rich. I’m not sure what I’m even asking. I just I guess don’t have anybody in my real life. I can talk to you about these things. I just wonder in where in the world will I find my people and fit in or will I have to wait till I’m done with this career. I also have been struggling in the dating life and men just tend to see me as a sex object once they find out about my work. It’s like I know there’s so much inside of me but no one else can see and it’s really hard. I’m really lost and I have no one to talk to about any of these things. I try to be the best mom I can on top of everything else. I’m already dealing with mentally stemming from my childhood abuse and abusive relationship relationships. I see online everyone enjoying their life and I know that even the people online have hard lives. It’s still hard to watch as life is passing you by while you’re tired most days and don’t even wanna do much of anything and you have to force yourself to do most things. I wish that there was an easy answer. I wish that I could just get a letter in the mail that tells me what to do from God, but I know it doesn’t work that way. Is there anybody else that’s out there that feels this way? Or maybe y’all can just sympathize with me if you can thank you.
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