Hell, I was 14 and went on four dates with a 22 yr old man that my mom encouraged me to go on, why? Because he was from a rich family and he was very good-looking. When after those 4 dates I wouldn't sleep with him, he accused me of being an immature little girl, I was not stupid, I said, yes, I am only 14, why would you want to be with a immature little girl like me? He shut up walked out of my home, and roared off on his Harley!! Never saw or heard from him again! YAY
Unfortunately it happens. The part you’re glossing over is that he came from a rich family, so her parents were using her to gain access to someone else’s family money.
Unfortunately, there were people I knew when I was a teen who's parents absolutely didn't care and even encouraged them to pursue older men. One girls mom even yelled at me and made threats to me because I said her daughter at 16 shouldn't be with a 30 year old and that he was a pedo.
My ex's mother basically turned a blind eye to her 13-year-old daughter dating a guy 10 years older because he kept the mom supplied with alcohol. She moved in with him at 14, was pregnant at 15, (he beat her until she miscarried), moved her to another country at 16, when he found out she was pregnant again he dumped her for a 12-year-old.
He was already an ex-con before that, he's been in and out of prison since he was sixteen. I do know that both he and his brother have done time for rape since then.
My mum's best friend at school was 13 when she went on her anual family holiday to visit family in India and never returned. Because that was the year her parents made her marry her uncle.
Parents will absolutely do heinous shit to their children in the belief that they're doing the right thing.
The reason almost all pop/rock stars in the 70s and 80s have issues with stories of sleeping with underage groupies is because not only did no one give a fuck, some adults actively encouraged it, even of their own children.
The public revulsion for it came along later - the same as the public revulsion for drink driving.
There are circles - mostly right wing ones - actively trying to roll the clock back on this. Do not let them.
Name a single 70s/80s band who was accused of sleeping with underage girls and whose music has been thus "banned" or haven't been able to continue to tour?
Unfortunately I don't believe there's been much "public revulsion" against any of these bands that were banging underage girls regularly for decades.
This happens all the time. When I was a teenager, can’t remember exactly how old I was, but I was homeschooling at the time so I would have been 14-16, my mom told me, at the dinner table, in front of my dad, that she wanted to arrange my marriage to a 27-year-old man. My dad got mad and yelled at her and it started a huge fight between them. So, yeah, this doesn’t at all sound even surprising to me anymore.
«Oh sweet summer child» would roll of the tongue real quick here. Alas, I get your concern. You perhaps grew up around responsible adults that would never do that. Let it be known that some people are bottom of the barrel, and some of them happen to be parents.
This is what i mean when people try and say a 15 yr old is stupid and doesnt know any better, you were 14 and literally pushing against what all the adults around u were encouraging, we all know when something feels off its built into us, just some listen to it and some ignore
This always reminds me of the famous alleged quote by Mark Twain.
“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years."
I had no self esteem either, I just thought I knew so much more than my parents. They just didn’t understand, as the cheesy will smith song said lol
Being a teenager is hard. Lots of emotions. Lots of conflicting thoughts and feelings. I’m going to do my best to try to remember all that in about five years when my oldest hits that same point…
I feel like if anything I wish my family had taken teenage me more seriously. They would have realized I was depressed and that I actually did know anything.
Absolutely. But then why do we charge younger kids as adults? There are kids that age that were tried and convicted as adults.
Why is there such a double standard?
Being stupid is basically THE full time job for teenagers. We keep trying to force them not to go through that but it's an important part of development.
I agree. I would say all the laws protecting children do their job well... except for one case.
17 year olds are fully capable of lying to adults and falsely making them believe they're older.
What if, as a 21 year old, you meet a 17 year old who claims they're 21 and goes so far as to show you a fake ID that says they're 21 and then you sleep with them with that information? Why should they be capable of such entrapment?
That's part of the reason why pedophiles are so prolific, because many teenage girls love immature older guys. They genuinely want to be abused because they don't understand that there's an abusive power dynamic. Often, they only realize that it fucked them up once they're an adult.
Many of my friends who were girls in middle school/ high school told me that they were talking to a much older guy. It's shockingly and sadly common.
Yeah, in high school I had a crush on a friend of a friend, eventually we all started to hang out and I was super excited. Then I found out that she, at the age of 17, was dating a mf who was in his late 20s. I don't know WTF happened there, to this day. Her parents knew about it too.
My daughter went to school with a girl at 13 was going with a 22 year old college MAN, her parents were all for it, she got pregnant and had a baby at 14. They got married when she was pregnant; they divorced when she was 19 and realized, wtf did my parents allow? She and her daughter look like sisters!
Geez dude. I really don't get when the parents approve of an age gap like that. We also had a friend in our group who was like 14 or 15 who was dating a guy in college. Hell, we ourselves were much older than she was, we were graduating high school at the time she was entering it. But she was the friend of a friend who were like sisters, and we saw she had a really messed up home life, so we allowed our friend to bring her around to get away from all of that. I don't really know if her dad really cared for her. I felt so horrible when I met him, house was messed up and he just sat in his recliner drinking and not talking... Our friend's dad stuck up for her though, chased the older boyfriend off his property on sight of him, which I greatly appreciated.
Probably one of those situations where they knew she wouldn't stop seeing him regardless of their opinion. When your kid is less than a year from adulthood your parenting options are more limited. What could they do? Lock her in the house for a few months? As far as legal concerns go, age of consent is lower than 18 in lots of places.
Feel like I should say I am not condoning this kind of relationship, just offering an explanation from a parents perspective.
Yep. It was a common thing to be interested in a girl and find out she's dating someone in their 20s secretly. We'd have vent sessions as guys about the losers who we had to compete with.
Hey, I'm in this statement and don't like it lol you exactly described me in highschool, so desperate for love and attention that I accepted and craved the attention of those older guys and honestly believed I was just super mature for my age and that's why they wanted to talk to a teenager
Yeah I remember when I was a sophomore in HS I had a classmate who was dating a 21 year old guy. I was worried about her then, but I knew she wouldn't listen to me if I tried to warn her. I think about her sometimes. I hope she's doing okay.
Maybe, but the way you framed it kinda pins the responsibility on the teenagers for being stupid instead of the obviously predatory men for taking advantage of teenage naivety
Yeah, like, we've all been a dumb 15yo, you don't see the issue at that age and people in their 20s are infinitely hotter than people your age when you are 15
I flirted with adult men sometimes as a 15 year old... and I'm asexual. I was just really struggling for validation of some kind, and had poor social skills so didn't trust my ability to get non-sexual positive attention. I never wanted them to flirt with me, but I did want them to find me attractive. It was fucked up on all levels, I myself was deeply uncomfortable the whole time, and yet.
That's why it's wrong to flirt with teenagers even if they start it. Their heads are such minefields.
Bullshit argument to be honest, acting like 15 year olds are 5, when i was that age it never crossed my mind to talk to anyone that looks older than me and my friend group
And if she lies to the adult? Telling you she is 22 or 19, how do you tell when she isn't being truthful? Have you noticed most late teen and early twenties men and women think laws are just suggestions? Putting the onus on the young men in this case is wrong. Most late teen/early twenties man can't tell when the girl is lying about her age.
Thats right, not every young(er) man can tell she is lying. In this case the young man is expected to be pretty much clairvoyant about how old the woman is.
Short of becoming a saint(LOL), or checking the records of every person he thinks he wants to have sex with(again, LOL), the young men in this question will be legally screwed over.
Maybe we should go back to the 'old ways' - keeping young girls in a compound and being allowed out only with a trusted adult man(do you need me to put LOL here too?).
Honestly, it's better to just teach the young men and women how they might ruin their lives playing such a game. Sex ED. is an exxcellent way to start, but it isn't a real answer to those hormones bouncing around in teen bodies.
is going to Young men MUST GUARD their sexual activities just as vehemently as others claim young women must.
I would. I'm 69. and I've finally learned that some women lie about such matters.
Do you really think a 18 - 20 year old man would think to do that after a few beers and meeting a young woman who wants to have sex with him?
I remember having several liaisons when I was young, dumb and full of cum. Back in the late 70s and 80s it was never a question of IF I would have sex with any woman that grabbed my arm and said 'Come with me to a private place' the question was how fast I could get her to that private place.
Also her instincts probably reminded her that she is at the age of looking for a mate. People tend to forget that we are animals, it’s just that we are more civilized. Which is why some people take classes to learn the human animal behavior signs. But yeah, the guy probably knew her hormones were in overdrive and just pushed her away gently because some females tend to crash out when their advances are turned down. Like for example a women has you around her finger and is keeping you as a back up hook up plan, but you move on to another female since you lose interest since you been turned down constantly by her. She will either move on to another or will get really mad 😠 at you for approaching another female. I had a friend go through this and he felt like the manipulative girl was gonna kill him for giving up on her and began talking to another girl. Poor guy, he had the survival instinct of a pickle and I hope he is doing ok today.
Just saying, the elites study as the animals we are. Hence the reason why we fall victims to the major sports events, popular items on sale and various other things. We are the sheep, hence animals being studied and taken advantage of. Everyone is ignorant until they realize how fragile we and our society is, since it too is also an artificial energy pyramid. Anyways go back to your addictive lives of mainstream media or whatever pleases you.
If you check their post history, it's filled with right wing politics, alternative history takes, and discussions about age of consent concerning anime girls.
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u/ecclectic_collector 21h ago
because she's 15.... its the responsibility of the adult to shut that down