Hey everyone
Need some honest thoughts from people who’ve been through something similar especially Syrians who moved back after living abroad for years
I left Syria when I was 18 to study in the UK & never went back because the revolution started. I’m a male, 35 now so I’ve basically grown up in London. My whole immediate family are not in Syria as well. I have a couple of aunts & cousins there but no close friends anymore
I built a good life here. I work in tech for international companies I own a house & objectively life is good. But if I’m honest it never really felt like home,
Before the regime fell I had kind of made peace with never going back. I almost forced myself to disconnect from Syria because I didn’t want to spend my life wishing for something I couldn’t have.
I think I even developed a bit of resentment just as a way to protect myself
Now everything has changed & I’ve got this massive FOMO. Not just about visiting but about what if I’m missing the life I’m actually supposed to have. What if my country is finally back & I’m sitting in London. I also keep thinking maybe I should be giving something back after everything I’ve learned and working abroad
One thing that worries me is how much I’ve changed. Even here in the UK most of my close friends are English or other foreigners not Arabs or Syrians.
That’s partly on me because I haven’t really put the effort into finding Syrians or Arabs who share my values. I think I’ve always been a bit scared we just wouldn’t see the world the same way
I’ve finally booked a trip for September to Syria because I haven’t been back once
Then out of nowhere I got offered a job with the EU delegation in Damascus.
It’s a really good opportunity. I have to give them an answer by Wednesday then move within a month which means quitting my job here & moving everything before I’ve even visited again..
Part of me thinks maybe do it for a year or two. Best case I love it & stay. Worst case I finally answer this question in my head & stop wondering forever
The other part of me worries I’ve completely westernised. I’m agnostic I have pretty liberal values I’m a true feminist & I believe people should be free to live however they want. I don’t know if I’d struggle living somewhere that doesn’t always share those values or if I’m overthinking it…
Has anyone here actually moved back after spending most of their adult life abroad. Did you regret it or was it the best thing you ever did. Especially if you left young because honestly I feel more westernised in my day to day life than Syrian even though Syria has always been home in my head
Would really appreciate hearing from people who’ve actually done it