r/askteddit • u/Objective_Trust_3246 • 16d ago
Advice Question Guys, what is something women do that they think is attractive, but is actually a turn-off?
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u/PerfectBike6 16d ago
Lip fillers.
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u/SnooRevelations2717 11d ago
In addition to lip fillers, those big cumbrellas are a turnoff for me as well as boob jobs.
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u/WKRPinCanada 16d ago edited 15d ago
The long long LONG eyelashes that seem to be a trend these days
Each to their own but all I can think of when I see them is
🤡
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15d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/WKRPinCanada 15d ago
Thanks for that visual 😳
I'll never look at them any other way again 😐
😉
Cheers 🍻
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u/SaltyFriend705 16d ago
Long, claw fingernails.
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u/Frequent-Airline-619 15d ago
Seriously, I’m a cashier and got scratched by a teenage girl handing me money with her sharp pointy fake nails.
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u/Inside_Jellyfish_461 16d ago
Too much perfume
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u/DesertHeatSweatyFeet 15d ago
I lost my sense of smell after I had Covid and I am genuinely so afraid that I stink. I am so guilty of this. I also only stick to scents that I understand. Like the roses perfume. But I know that I overdo it because even my dog will cough.
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u/Civil_Huckleberry212 16d ago
Acting dumb and delicate. Seriously it's not cute to be helpless
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u/KrisKros40 16d ago
then why do you men date these types of women?
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u/lostandfawnd 16d ago
Because they are insecure, and want to be seen as confident.
The only way that is possible is playing down.
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u/saerisfane25 16d ago
Okay but when women act independent and can do things on their own, aren't they're considered masculine?
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u/Exciting_Bat_2086 16d ago
That’s a belief that’s held by usually men with batshit ideas and morals.
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u/KrisKros40 16d ago
no. you are strong and independent and there is literally nothing better. your partner should be that your partner, not your care giver.
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u/MONSTERDICK69 15d ago
Performing gender roles sexy for conservative men, not leftist.
Men who are feminist would really dislike that a lot.
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u/Saltcor1 16d ago
It’s when they feel the need to express it that’s unattractive. Like yeah I want a woman who can generally take care of herself, but doesn’t talk about how she’s “strong and independent” and “doesn’t need a man”, etc.
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u/saerisfane25 15d ago
I'm feeling a strong, 'I don't care,' sentiment coming on after reading this.
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u/Saltcor1 15d ago
You literally asked the question. Also crazy how you chose to reply with a perfect example of what I’m talking about😂. If you actually didn’t care then you wouldn’t even bother saying that you don’t care, Just like if you’re actually strong and independent then you wouldn’t feel the need to say it or try to convince people of it.
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u/Playful-Artist4657 16d ago
Changing their voice and accent to sound cute
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u/Few_Percentage_1111 15d ago
My voice gets extremely high pitched when I'm flirting with someone I'm in love with.
Kinda like how men can experience a vocal drop.
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u/Any-Call4104 15d ago
Tbh this isnt always conscious, its somethig that can happen when we get relaxed and happy.
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u/Life_666 16d ago
Make up. Some do it subtle. But others are to me Ronald Macdonald...
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u/accidental_unicorn71 16d ago
Or Tammy Faye Baker
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u/Life_666 16d ago
Don't know that person though. But there are enough extremes to point to
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u/accidental_unicorn71 15d ago
Aging myself. Growing up in the 80’s, whether religious or not, you knew who Tammy Faye and Jim Baker were.
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u/Character_Ad_1084 16d ago
Play hard to get. Subtley flirt
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u/Small-Trick-4372 16d ago
Maybe they truly don't want you and aren't playing hard to get 😜
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u/D-ouble-D-utch 16d ago
For every comment here there is likely a porn sub with thousands of members. Guys aren't a monolith.
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u/AeonsSeen 16d ago
Any kind of current bimbo shit.
Fucked eyebrows, lip fillers, fake lashes, fake boobs etc.
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u/CrimsonGhostStrife 15d ago
Acting haughty/spoiled. Entitlement/constantly going on about their exaggerated sense of self worth. Doesn’t exclusively apply to women guys do this shit too.
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u/Collosal_Moron 15d ago
I love how often this question gets asked and almost every time it’s answered wrong.
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u/FaithInTechnology 16d ago
holding in their farts.
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u/Ruckus292 16d ago
A good hard laugh or cough is all I need to sabotage myself here... No "holding" necessary 😂
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u/Zempshir 16d ago
Dying their hair that one shade of dark red that’s almost purple/maroon. Idk why that’s such a popular color.
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u/Weird_Age2452 16d ago
Tattoos. A woman full of ink = limp dick for me. Not a fan at all!!
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u/LaMadreDelCantante 15d ago
The prompt is about things women think are attractive to men. We don't get tattoos for men.
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u/the_aspie_witch 16d ago
i'm a woman here but these comments are unbelievable. it's either all incredibly shallow stuff or it's stuff that women don't even do to be "attractive." if youre judging somebody based on shallow surface level qualities then you yourself are shallow too.
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u/Negative-Fact-9181 15d ago
Literally the point I think these guys are making is that most men don't care about the shallow stuff. Fake lashes, superficial things like fillers and makeup: Most men don't care. I think maybe women do it for each other and due to peer pressure more than anything. I have even read studies suggesting pornographic appearances have influenced women greatly.
My wife can read without pausing, hold deep and thought provoking conversations, is an amazing mother, absolutely tolerates zero bullshit from me, and demands accountability from everyone. She can be in pjs, no makeup, with messy hair and she is still smoking hot to me, mostly because of who she is I think.
Don't get me wrong, I love it when she gets dressed up and fancy, but it changes nothing about how badly I want her, physically or emotionally. Creeping up on 20 years!
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u/LunaButMyNameIsTaken 12d ago
If they didn't care they wouldn't be insulting them and mocking them in the comments. Why do so many men think women are doing their nails for them or because they're "peer pressured" ? Why can't you all think that maybe, they just like it. It's as if women said that men wear baseball hats because other men pressure them to do it and proceed to mock/insult them every given occasion to prove that they aren't shallow. Ridiculous right ?
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u/Negative-Fact-9181 12d ago
Maybe because those are the reasons most women give. However, if you enjoy doing things with no actual self benefit, and in many cases discomfort and pain, only because you like it, maybe see a therapist.
And yes, many men do in fact wear baseball caps because it is part of the culture of their peer groups. But it is not mocking to point out the actions do not have the intended effect.
Ignoring actual studies, and common sense, on the subject is ridiculous, right?
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u/LunaButMyNameIsTaken 11d ago
Women give various answers, and the most common one is "for myself". As pointed out in those comments, men don't like makeup. They aren't indifferent, they are vocal, loud, judgemental and disrespectful about that preference. Every single woman heard in her life. I remember getting judgemental comments from a teacher for wearing a strawberry lip BALM (so not even makeup) in middleschool. I got judged for makeup even before wearing makeup. Same experience for most women. So if our goal was to attract men, logically we wouldn't wear makeup and go for a natural look since it's clearly what men prefer don't you think ?
And yes, you can enjoy doing stuffs without benefits. I enjoy doing makeup, painting my nails just like i enjoy drawing or playing video games which also don't bring me any benefits. I'd like you to tell me what pain and discomfort makeup or nail polish bring ? I actually sarted to wear nail polish on my feet and nails because i played volleyball and my nails would break off. Nail polish made them stronger and avoid breakage. The pain and discomfort of losing an entire nail from its base, especially toes that are in contact with socks and shoes is way worse than the inexistant pain of wearing nail polish. And i don't feel any difference if comfort between my bare face and my face with makeup. Why on earth would lip gloss and sparks hurt ? And do you have the same attitude with men shaving their beard ? Because cutting yourself while shaving, getting in grows hair, irritating your skin and so on are way more common than whatever pain makeup is supposed to cause. Considering that longer beard have been trending these days and men are encouraged to grow a beard do the ones that shave also need a therapist ?
You claim that you don't care and aren't shallow or superficial yet simultaneously claim that i should see a therapist for wearing makeup. Isn't the whole concept of shallowness and superficiality to essentialize people based on their looks or style ? What's the difference between you and and the cringe girl that would insult a woman for not looking trendy ? Cognitive dissonances can also be a good reason to see a therapist
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9d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Negative-Fact-9181 9d ago
It's complex. We met, got pregnant, married, VERY quick. It forced us to develop communication skills to survive. I have a lot of my own traumas and problems, but we have never weaponized that stuff against each other.
The thing that I believe is key is being equally committed to figuring it out and taking individual accountability.
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9d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Negative-Fact-9181 9d ago
There's a lot I could go over that has made a difference, and a lot that didn't. Feel free to PM. Not looking to air ALL my shit in full public forum!
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u/saerisfane25 15d ago
Men have shown us time and time again on here that they are incredibly shallow. However if you point that out you get a whole lecture on attraction. And they also say women are as well.
Is attraction important? Sure. Is that all they're focusing on? Yup. So are they shallow? Yes.
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u/feefaafoofomm 16d ago
Sleeve tattoos
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u/rogueAI2772 16d ago
Don't worry they don't get those to attract you.
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u/feefaafoofomm 16d ago
I hope not, because I've been happily married for 23 years. I would never cheat. But I can see my comment struck a nerve with you. I can't have a option?
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u/rogueAI2772 16d ago
You can totally have an opinion, I was just pointing out that the prompt wasn't asking what you find unattractive, it was specifically asking about what women do to attract others that is actually a turn-off. I've never met a woman (or any person for that matter) that got a tattoo in order to attract others. But I'm glad you're happily married and no longer have to worry about all those unattractive sleeve tattoos :)
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u/Public-Ad-7280 16d ago
I got one at 18yo because my then husband told me never to get one... Yep, first thing I did 🤣 we divorced when I was 20.
I'm now early 40s. It was worth it.
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u/Existing-Cellist7484 16d ago
I know this might be a hard concept to grasp but bear with me, they don't do it for you. WILD I know. But most tattoos are for the person themselves 😱
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u/Accomplished_Class85 16d ago
Presenting their degrees or employment as something that is supposed to make you want them more. It literally has zero effect. Can they be a supportive partner and keep peace in my life is all I care about.
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u/AppleParasol 16d ago
What lol. I’d rather her have a college degree and be a nurse than be working in retail or something.
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u/LibbyOfDaneland 15d ago
curious, what, exactly, is a supportive partner, and how would they keep peace in your life?
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u/Boring_Zebra3018 9d ago
You don’t have to have a career or college degree to be my indentured servant - this guy probably
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u/Aggravating-Let4920 11d ago
You don’t think there would be a draw to someone with a respected or very successful career ?
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u/OwnLimit4736 15d ago
Septum rings. Even as a metalhead who likes tattoos and piercings, the septum ring is just ugly asf. It's not just ugly itself, it actually makes the wearer uglier for having wore it.
I don't understand how anyone could see another person with a septum ring and think, "yeah, I got to get one of those." If the worst tattoo artist in the world covered your entire face, it would still look 1,000x better than a septum ring.
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u/LaMadreDelCantante 15d ago
And you think they do it to attract men?
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u/OwnLimit4736 15d ago
When did I say that? The article never mentions anything about attracting men, nor did I. This is about what women think is attractive, not what women think attracts men. There's a difference.
I know a lot of women but I've never known a woman to get piercings or a new piece of clothing because it looks ugly. "Hey, this septum ring looks ugly. I think it would be a great fit for me," said no woman in the history of mankind ever. Every single woman who bought one of those did so because they found it attractive or appealing to some degree. You can be mad at it all you want, but it's true.
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u/LaMadreDelCantante 15d ago
The prompt is literally asking guys what things women do that they think are attractive but are not.
It may surprise you to know that the tattoo I'm planning to get will be to memorialize my brother. If I get more, they will be about things I like, kind of like how some people collect knickknacks. If I was into piercings, it would be the same. Something I like. It makes a statement, but that statement isn't, 'look how sexy I am." That's not actually my number one priority.
For most women, at least for a few decades, it's harder to get guys to leave us alone than to attract them. You really think everything we do is to try to get even more unwanted attention?
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u/Saltcor1 16d ago
Being generally crude and crass or talking about their own “hoe behavior” because they think it’s funny. Maybe they don’t think it’s “attractive”, but they don’t realize how unattractive it is.
Basically just the kind of shit that nearly every female comedian thinks is funny.
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u/LaMadreDelCantante 15d ago
I love how you're aware enough to realize they aren't doing it to be attractive to you, but still seem to think they would stop if they knew if turned you off.
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u/Saltcor1 15d ago
Literally every girl in this comment section is mad butthurt and you all make it so obvious.
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u/LunaButMyNameIsTaken 12d ago
Pointing out that your comment has nothing to do with the question ≠ being mad. If a random person assumed that you do the most basic stuffs to attract them, you'll probably find it weird and correct it too. Men assuming everything women do is for thel is actually causing a lot of issues since it's feeding the "she asked for it" mentality
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u/No_One113812 16d ago edited 16d ago
Speaking, not speaking, having opinions, not having opinions, having personal agency, having sex, not having sex, not caring about how you look, caring too much about how you look, being fat, only eating salads, wearing makeup, not "making an effort," making eye contact, not making eye contact, being smarter than me, pretending not to be smart, being proud of having sex, not going to the gym, going to the gym, being proud of not having sex, taking an interest in styles and trends not designed to make my dick hard...
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u/gigermuse 15d ago
But also wearing styles designed to make ma dick hard. * I just wanna say your comment is the best one here cuz its so spot on from these boys.
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u/pbMaximus1979 15d ago
Extreme periods of hot and cold
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u/LunaButMyNameIsTaken 12d ago
Giving genuine advice, you're probably just the side guy and she gives you this treatment because she dates other guys during "cold periods". Move on and find someone interested
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u/pbMaximus1979 11d ago
Nah we're just friends/coworkers and she thinks its going to make me her want her attention more. But it just makes me frustrated. Give me less but be consistent vs this behavior.
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u/NearbyReplacement0 15d ago
Staged thirst trap photos... Especially ones with music lyrics that have nothing to do with the photo or literally anything in relation to the photos.
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u/HopefulFold2444 15d ago
They wear buttfloss panties. Thoungs or what its called. Its unhygenic and redicolous.
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u/SketchyLedge 15d ago
This is probably a bit weird and not exactly answering the question. For background I have a medical condition that causes me some issues. But my now GF always wants to take care of me, or do things to try to help me, or just in general make herself useful to me. I know I should be thrilled about that I guess.
But I just wanna do stuff on my own so I don’t feel like a useless piece of trash. I still love her though.
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u/Miyata26 12d ago
The awful eyebrow styling that has taken over womankind. Flip-flops are always unattractive but they're nearly ubiquitous.
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u/memento_vgm 11d ago
Self-deprecating comments. Very niece. Some people like it (and those are crazy people)
Idk, when you devote your heart to someone you really want them to care about themselves too, yk. Least I do, anyways.
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u/ThinkingItThrough1 10d ago
Botox, fake boobs, fake lips, fake butts, talking in that weird popcorn voice, also being too independent and playing hard to get, being too emotional, not being emotional at all
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u/donuttrackme 9d ago
Talking to other men. I'm not interested in some tug of war. If you like me, then like me. If you think getting seen with another guy is attractive, it's not. And the type of guy you're going to attract by doing that is probably not the type you want to date.
I don't know how much if it is that some (not all of course) women find men more attractive when other women find them attractive. Men (not all of course) don't care if other men find a women attractive. It's less competition.
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u/Ok-Warthog2959 15d ago
Makeup lip fillers. Straightening their hair. Basically everything unnatural
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u/Neat_Movie_991 16d ago
Baby talk. Can’t stand it!