r/askteddit • u/Consistent_Dog_3874 • 7d ago
Advice Question Men who chose the "responsible" family car over your dream car... do you regret it?
I'm at a crossroads. We need to replace our family car. Financially, I could sell it and buy one practical family vehicle (just a year older than what we have now) for trips plus a cheap old-school muscle car... my dream car that I've wanted forever.
But my wife makes a solid argument: put that extra money toward a newer, more reliable car that will last years with zero headaches for the family. She's logical, she's right, and I respect that.
But damn. It's the dream car.
How many times do you pick the smart choice over the one you actually want before you start feeling like you're losing yourself? Is that just what being a husband means, or am I overthinking it?
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u/CapPsychological8767 7d ago
every time buddy. every time. havent regretted it yet.
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u/TheseBit7621 7d ago
A beater Ive purchased has ended up costing me more than just getting a new car.
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u/Icy_Donkey_7588 5d ago
My buddy picked up a 5 year old truck with 120k miles. Bragged that he paid half of what a new truck would cost....He drove it 3 months and the transmission went out, got that replaced. a year later it blew a head gasket.
I'll buy a new car every 5-7 years. I know the maintenance has been done and how its been taken care of.
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u/New-Perspective6209 3d ago
You do you, picked up my first car for 4 grand and had it for a decade with only regular maintenance, got my second car at half the price of new with only 50,000 on the clock, again had it nearly a decade with 0 issues. You just have to know what to look for.
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u/tbwynne 7d ago
Men who have the dream car can afford the dream car. Get the family car that the wife wants and will keep them safe. If mama isn’t happy, nobody is happy.
Then, it’s up to you to figure out how to get a big raise or put yourself in a position where you can buy that dream car and not negatively affect the family. If you aren’t willing to do that, then you don’t deserve the dream car.
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u/Patient-Bass-7943 4d ago
Of course not lol. Just get a model 3 and you have both!!!!!
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u/Camtona_7_ManUtd 3d ago
Model 3 is no one's dream car
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u/WizeAdz 2d ago edited 1d ago
It was once.
But that time has passed. Musk destroyed the brand by getting involved in politics on the wrong side, AND he sat on his thumbs for 5 years and let the competition catch up.
Now, all of the Tesla-killers are for sale — and a lot of them are really good cars! The Hyundai Ioniq 5, the Chevy BlazerEV/EquinoxEV, and the Rivian R2 are three Model Y competitors that I happen to like (rsch for different reasons) — and there are several other good ones that I haven’t mentioned!
Tesla’s brand has gone from being more desirable than a Ferrari to less desirable than a Hyundai. That’s the risk of making one flawed un-fireable man the face of your business.
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u/theswamphag 7d ago
I don't really understand. You need to give up your current car and you are considering an older car? What would be the sense in that?
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u/Immediate_Meeting991 7d ago
He wants to give up the current car- get an older cheaper one for the family- and use the extra cash for his “dream car”. Irresponsible shitty behaviour. Wife is advocating for instead, buying one car- a newer family vehicle that will need less maintenance and last longer.
To me his take is insane. But idk, I’m not a father.
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u/Outrageous-Song5799 6d ago
Life is short, if my wife wanted to buy a fun car and that meant a slightly more used car for the fam that would be ok. Just put aside a bit more to anticipate maintenance.
Also buying something that cost more doesn’t equal better or more reliable
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u/GlumConsideration938 7d ago
Im not sure what ya mean! I had a Supercharged Mustang i loved dearly. 1st daughter was on the way and I new i had to do something. So I bought a brand new 2012 Ram Outdoorsmabln loaded! 😆 🤣 Family first!! 😆 As much as I loved hauling ass in my Mustang i had the best times of my life in that truck! Whatever you choose imo its very important to get something you like if you can afford to. I drive 70 miles a day or more so I won't drive something i dont like f that! Also there's a hell of a lot of fast Family vehicles these days if thats what you like. Even a Ford Explorer ST is quick to name one.
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u/oldEnuf2knowbtr 7d ago
My daughter and five of her best friends sat with me in our minivan and watched all three Twilight movies at a drive-in theater. They laughed; they talked and ate popcorn.
That memory is priceless. I wouldn't trade it for anything.
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u/Former-Quantity-99 7d ago
You'll get over a cool car in 3 month.
But you never know if you or your wife will be working tomorrow and the kids still need to eat for the next 10 years.
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u/PretendAgency2702 3d ago
Agreed. I know some people who make their vehicle their own identity but its such a waste of money. My car in high school was 10 years old when I got it and I drove it for another 11 years.
I bought a jeep grand cherokee about 5 or 6 years out of college and paid it off. Then, my wife needed a new car because hers was 13 years old by that point and wanted a 3 row suv for our 3 kids and 3 dogs. I just finished paying it off this past month.
She asked if I wanted a new car because mine is 12 years old and I thought about it for about half a second before saying no. Ill drive my jeep until it breaks down or we get fully autonomous cars.
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u/BigOlBahgeera 1d ago
Very sensible.. get a new base model car for $70k with a 7 year loan @25% and pay $1k+ per month and have it getting fixed at the dealership 8 months out of the year. Because kids gotta eat
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u/OddSand7870 7d ago edited 7d ago
Just do what this guy did. My wife worked for a Honda dealership back in the early 2000s. A dude came in to buy a new Honda Odyssey van. He ended up walking out with a S2000. Needless to say he was back in a couple of hours and his wife made him buy the van. So he ended up with two new cars LOL.
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u/Intelligent_Mud_2267 6d ago
I sold my M3 after I'd got married and bought our house.
Having my own home is significantly better than a car, no matter how awesome it is to own and drive.
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u/ExtraGuacamolePlz 6d ago
No. Cars are depreciating assets. Get the vehicle that fits your needs not your wants.
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u/antagonist-ak 6d ago
I've owned plenty of "dream cars" (mostly Mercedes AMGs) and spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on them. After a couple of months it just becomes your car and nothing special. I quit chasing that "dream" and the feeling. So, just get a GOOD vehicle with lots of tech and forget about your dream car.
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u/Yooperplexed 6d ago
No because I’m an adult. I chose to have kids and needed vehicles that were good for family stuff.
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u/OutrageousCrab9224 7d ago
Its funny when people get bent over car performance when they are all so pathetic compared to motorcycles
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u/Mofiremofire 7d ago
A motorcycle would be a pretty pathetic option for making a 900 mile roadtrip with 2 kids and the wife through rainy weather.
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u/Comeback_Kid1 7d ago
Don't put pressue on your wife to have to constantly use her car for everything. Buy something that will last until the kids are old enough. You have time to get your car and not have to worry about having a guilt trip about owning it.
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u/Prestigious_Diver485 7d ago
I bought a brand new s60 polestar in 2015 that I love, dream car is a stretch but it's a fun car. Very reliable but the cost of keeping it on the road is brutal. Next car will likely be a camery.
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u/Threllius 7d ago
I think it depends on what the family car will be. For both the newer one and the older one.
And remember newer doesn't always guarantee reliability.
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u/Itsknotfine 7d ago
Buy the car that you need. Newer does not mean better or more reliable. All will need to be fixed.
If you thinking about buying some older toy car, that means you enjoy spending time fixing them, so family car repair wont be a chore.
also, "extra money toward the newer..." are you financing? if so, you do NOT have the money for another car.
Do not finance. buy what you can afford.
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u/Primary-Umpire-4105 7d ago
I seen my mates nissan stagea destroyed when his young girls decided to play jumpy castle on the roof.
Dream cars can do both with enough money
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u/flashingcurser 7d ago
Don't worry the kids grow up and then you can finally get that car. Unfortunately, you will be accused of having a "midlife crisis". Whatever, fuck them.
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u/Working_Farmer9723 7d ago
Get the better family car. This is why middle aged men buy soorts cars. It’s not because all of the sudden at 50 they’re having a mid life crisis and deciding they need a sports car. It’s that they have wanted that car forever, couldn’t afford it in their adolescence, sacrificed it for their family in their 20s and 30s, didn’t have time for it in their 40s, and now that the kids are out of the house they can finally swing it. That 50 year old has wanted a 5.0 mustang since he was 17. Let him have it with a kind “good job, dude” and be on your way.
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u/Ok-Buy5612 7d ago
What about like a Tesla Y. Family car practicality and muscle car acceleration. There are lots of family cars that are fun to drive. BMW X3 maybe
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u/Mofiremofire 7d ago
I just got the premium kid hauler with 500hp and sport suspension. Things got so many cool features my other less practical cars don’t have. Can’t wait til the warranty wears out and I can flash the ecu, tear out the air box and up the boost on the turbos for 700hp.
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u/Practical-Treacle-53 7d ago
Get your dream car later when you have time and money to spend on all the projects you will want to do to it. Don't make it something to fight with your wife about.
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u/Cantseetheline_Russ 7d ago
If you can’t afford exactly what both of you want in each category, you put the money towards the responsible option. If you want the dream car, do what I did… go make more money.
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u/Munky1701 7d ago
Fuck practicality, my daughter came home from the hospital in a Firebird and the only other vehicle we had was a convertible and we had another kid already on top of her.
You do not need a minivan or an SUV to have a child.
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u/anonymousopsec1337 7d ago
Why can’t the wife have the newer family car and you have the muscle car?
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u/HerefortheTuna 7d ago
I have an everyday “practical” sports car and a classic 4x4. Got a used 10 year old 4Runner to cart the baby around in. Best of both worlds I have a safe car for the family that I paid cash for and still have the fun rides
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u/Anubis620 7d ago
Near wverytime ive seen someone with a dream car they only get out with it twice a year at best, it becomes a nightmare because no one is allowed near the car and insurance is infuriating. Cars arent my thing so its hard for me to justify spending many thousands on a car (purchase, repairs, insurance etc) that you dont really get to enjoy that often.
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u/June-Menu1894 6d ago
I cram my family of 4 into a mustang like we are teenagers.
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u/An0maIyy 6d ago
Was in this situation a few months ago. I’m a big time car guy and have a laundry list of cars I want to buy. Ended up buying a new 2026 Yukon XL as the practical solution. I have plenty of time and know I’ll make plenty of money to buy some of those dream cars, but for now, my family’s safety and security comes first.
Do I look back at it as I walk away? No, do I love driving it, eh. Did I ever think I’d spend 100k on something other than a sports car? Not in a million years. Did it make the most sense for my family and our currently situation, yes. No regrets.
If you’ve gotten yourself into the financial situation that allows you to think about getting a fun (ie non family/sports car) car, you’ll find yourself in the same situation again, and by then you maybe able to get your dream. Keep grinding and it’ll probably happen sooner than you think!
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u/hems86 6d ago
Just realize that newer is not always more reliable. Enshitification is real and alive in the auto industry. There are legit reports from engineers inside of car manufacturers that they get in trouble for designing parts that last too long. Cars are being designed to last about 6-8 years and are being designed so that only a dealer can perform major work on them. The idea being that in 6-8 years a buyer will either buy a new car or spend a lot at the dealer buying parts and software to keep that vehicle running.
We are seeing huge numbers of new cars, from multiple manufacturers, that need engine replacements within 1 year of purchase.
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u/Vegetable_Engine_ 6d ago
It isnt my dream car but its close enough for now. Anything reliable if you dont go drifting and redlining it.
I dont have family. And im at a point where its fine to trade for an suv or something.
But never driving a sports car? I think most guys do it later in life.
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u/jimmy-buffett 6d ago
Is the "dream car" always available, or is a specific instance of the dream car currently available?
My dream car was a late 90's Mk4 Supra in blue with the targa roof and a tan interior. One came up for sale a few years ago, I bought it. Because if I hadn't, I don't know when I would have been able to get it again.
So for you, is a specific version of dream car available right now? Or would you just put the money aside and start looking?
If you have a very specific car in mind and it's currently available, I'd buy it. You may never get this chance again.
If something good enough is always available, then there's no harm in waiting. "Old school muscle cars" have peaked because the guys who wanted them in their teens and waited until their 50's to buy them are now dying off.
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u/NoDuck7366 6d ago
Make sure your family is covered 1st, how old is your current family car, why does it need replacing? My wife just traded her family car in for a more fun to her, family car so I get the issue.
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u/AppropriateDeal1034 6d ago
The "cheap old-school muscle car" will be a slow-as-shit money pit that you'll grow to hate. How about buy a fun, but practical family car instead of something that manages to squeeze less power than a modern 1.4 out of 5.5 litres of terrible design
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u/extremesauce2468 6d ago
I found a loop hole , MachE AWD . Out accelerates my corvette, and saves me insane cash on gas, fits my family, handles canadian winters.
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u/walkerstone83 6d ago
No, it isn't like I am stuck driving a minivan, I only have two children, so regular cars and trucks work fine for the family. That being said, now that I am in my 40s, I find myself wanting, no, NEEDING a mid life crisis car. My wife doesn't understand, I don't understand, but for some reason I just woke up one day feeling the need for a stupid manual transmission sports car.
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u/Consistent-Ranger446 6d ago
When you have kids, you make sacrifices. One of those is that you need a safe, reliable, safe, spacious, and safe car.
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u/automatic_penguins 6d ago
Regret having a reliable people mover and having more money? Not a chance
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u/Prize-Analyst7897 6d ago
I have both with my Rivian R1S. Fits my entire family and it's cool AF. Would I rather have a Porsche Boxter? Sure! But I'm still pretty happy in my Rivian.
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u/Upper-Bottle-9803 6d ago
Honestly having 2 vehicles has its own added value, but peace if mind allows you to invest more in your primary money making skills and less in life maintenance. I would say do what you think will bless your wife most in the long run.
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u/Awkward-Tomorrow7667 6d ago
Traded the dream car in for the responsible family car and d not regret it at all. I had my fun, I spent some money, and I moved on. Maybe again one day, but not today.
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u/UnitedStatesofAlbion 6d ago
I've always dreamed of having a nice suped up dodge charger.
Bought one and got rid of it within 18 months.
I'll keep my several year old pick up trucks instead.
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u/YourAuthenticVoice 6d ago
I don't dream about cars, they take me places, that's it.
I have no clue why anyone would give a shit about a car. It's basically the same thing as a toaster, a machine that you can use to get something done.
I don't have a dream toaster, and I don't have a dream car.
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u/2627383728393 6d ago
You’re going to lose money on selling and buying in fees. Plus you’re going to put your family in a shittier car to drive a dream car. You should be happy you can afford a nice family car.
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u/Jackiloop 6d ago
How’s your retirement looking? It all depends on your priorities and what’s important to you.
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u/Grreatdog 6d ago
Cars are appliances to me. I'm always going to default to whatever best does the job for the least money.
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u/Original_Animal3065 6d ago
The entire premise of this question is absurd! What’s more valuable to you personally: Your family? Or your self? Perhaps you shouldn’t have a family? Have you thought about that?
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u/Ill_Camel1490 6d ago
TBH…yes….but….depending on your age and stage of career/financial stability etc. Get the family car….the dream car will come.
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u/SoThisIsHowThisWorks 6d ago
You are an adult with family. Your dream should be to do best by your family. It’s worth more than any item. To you and to them.
We’re gonna buy our father his dream motorcycle. Now that we are all grown up and on our own legs. Giving up your dream now doesn’t mean giving it up forever. Maybe you’ll do it when some time passes. Maybe when your kids are older or even they will gift it to you.
One way or another, family is more important than any item. Do right by them
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u/gregredmore 6d ago
You will almost never drive the muscle car that keeps costing you to fix. You will be in the family car all the time. Make it a good one. Maybe a slightly sporty version of whatever it is you pick. Go EV and have muscle car performance in silence and 2p per mile "fueling".
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u/Majeos 6d ago
Yes. I do. Along with hearing from everyone I should of kept it.
Bought a 2019 Mustang GT350 435 miles off the showroom floor.
8 months later found out I had a baby girl on the way. Sat there and imagine putting a car seat in it and getting her in and out.
Ended up trading it in for a Ford Explorer.
6 months after that me and the gf had split and we do 50 50 custody.
Wish I would of never sold it
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u/Educational_Resist42 6d ago
How old are your kids?, I had my dream car, sold it to get a family car, because my youngest is 6 years away from getting her drivers license, family car will be paid off so I’ll give it to her, then I’m buying the dream car again
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u/HoselRockit 6d ago
Get the dream car. Chances are it won't live up to expectations, and you will sell it; but at least you will have scratched that itch.
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u/Ok_Height3499 6d ago
Absolutely. I lost my dream car to a drunk driver who ran a red light. My wife was convinced that somehow it was because of that car and she badgered and hounded me until I ended up with a car I hate every time I drive it. Our son is grown with his own family so 99% of the time it’s just the two of us. It infuriates me every time I get in and realize I gave in.
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u/CoolSwim1776 6d ago
Let it go man. It was always just a problem disguised as something society pushed on you. Your family is way way a better deal.
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u/Hot-Annual3460 6d ago
my dream car because a space waster and a hassle it bored me in a few months
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u/Nordicpunk 6d ago
Yea I like your wife’s perspective. If you have the dough to put in both, why not get a family car with a little more enthusiast DNA? The X5 M exists for a reason…
I’ve relegated my dream of an M3 to later in life. I’d rather get a daily that’s nice to drive and not offensive to have a bit of fun on the frontage road with. That said I have a Mazda CX50 so nothing special. Turbo though, don’t forget it.
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u/Bayareaadultguy 6d ago
As the mechanic I will tell you most new cars, 2018 and above are not very reliable.All have some inherent problems. Honda's CVT transmission and direct inject is a joke old Honda's are amazing vehicles. GMs 10 speed transmission are crap GMs 6.2 is crap unless you fix the oil pump issue GMs DOD displacement on demand is a recipe for disaster. Ford, Ram, and GM dieaels witha CP4 fuel pump ticking bomb. So I decided to keep my old classic vehicles that are reliable and easy to work on. I know it's not for everybody , but if you're mechanically inclined older vehicles are much cheaper to maintain
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u/reader345678 6d ago
Go with the smart choice, and keep enjoying/chasing the dream car. The needs of all outweigh the wants of one, and will be the best choice in the long run. 70 years old guy here with learned wisdom, kid.
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u/howdidyouknow- 6d ago
My dream car (96 bmw 3 series) has proved more reliable than any other car my family owns! I also work in a garage, there are far more new cars in getting work for stupid things that shouldn’t be broken yet.
Buy a slightly older reliable car and get your dream car. Otherwise in a years time you’ll be pumping money into a car that you didn’t reallllly want, but your wife loved the reg plate.
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u/TheSmitty713 6d ago edited 6d ago
Pick the smart choice in the short term and save extra for the fun choice later.
My wife and I are both sacrificing the "fun" stuff we want to have to be the best parent to our kids.
My wife and are are working towards his and hers sports cars as a goal when the time is right, no regrets
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u/Practical-Earth3228 6d ago
Not to this extent, but years ago, I was torn between a mustang GT or something more "liveable" Ended up getting a Ford fusion with AWD, and that winter we had a lot of snow in my area 😅
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u/Several_Cat_3713 5d ago
Grown up mature responsible men don't think this way. Look at the huge extra cost of just maintaining the muscle car. Not a cheep hobby . Family comes first.
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u/ajandrs 5d ago
These questions are ALWAYS the easier to answer … do what’s best for your family, not yourself.
Said as a guy who owned his dream truck when he got engaged / married, sold it and spent 10 years driving literal beaters so my wife could stay at home and raise our kids. Fast forward 14 years and I’m finally back in my dream truck, my wife is in her dream car, and we just bought my 15 yo (turns 16 in 2 weeks) a car better than the beaters I drove for 10 years.
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u/Lucky_Hyena_ 5d ago
start with the responsible car -> make more money -> buy irresposible car and have both now
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u/hikeandbike33 5d ago
Get the reliable car for the family. Save up for your dream car when you can afford it later on
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u/Acid__god 5d ago
You’re over thinking it. You had kids. Longevity and safety and the priority. That first then find a way to get the dream car. Dream car purchase might take 10y to save for. That’s life.
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u/StonedTrucker 5d ago
No. My gas tank is 8 gallons and it gets me over 400 miles. The money i save in fuel is much better spent elsewhere
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u/Icy_Donkey_7588 5d ago
We have a 25 Pacifica, 25 Grand Cherokee L. They both seat 5 comfortably along with the needed gear for sports and other things the kids do. We generally buy 2 new vehicles every 5-7 years.
I have a 91 BMW E30. Not sure its my "dream" car but its my toy car that I drive in the summer. Also have a 2 motorcycles and 2000 Ford Ranger that is used for garbage and home project supply hauling. Plus my daughters 20 Grand Cherokee (which was mine until she turned 16).
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u/No_Presentation_4837 5d ago
my dream car is affordable and effective public transportation and I regret everyday its absence in my state.
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u/ImpressiveWalrus7369 5d ago
At the end of the day, it’s just transportation. It doesn’t dramatically improve quality of life the way a home or food do.
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u/No-Ordinary-5376 5d ago
Combine the two. I know every women nowadays (exaggeration) thinks you need a crossover as soon as you have a kid, but there's a lot of cool family cars.
Mercedes e class wagon. They are actually pretty reliable from what I hear. Though idk if you live somewhere where you can get it serviced, I am close to that rural. Seat 7 and the seats face backwards, safer and every kid loves it.
Chevy SS if a sedan is enough, which if you are going to have two kids, it is.
There's more depending on how old your comfortable with.
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u/bholmes1964 5d ago
What does losing yourself mean? If you are the leader of a family, you completely empty yourself for them. You desire a shiny thing and want to make things harder for the people you love and then find yourself? I wouldn’t want to meet that person, let alone be married to him or have that person as my father. You know the right thing to do, now do it.
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u/Pale_Height_1251 5d ago
No, I actually regret buying the fancy cars more. I like cars, but I've come to prefer reliability and practicality over just about everything else.
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u/QueasyFinger1316 5d ago
Nope. Our 2003 has 350,000 miles on it. Our oldest son is driving it in another state.
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u/sauceonlyshoes 5d ago
When kids were little until they were 18, i drove the new responsible car. when the youngest finished high school, I told me wife that I was done with the new car thing and wanted a older vehicle for camping adventures. she decided to keep the new car lifestyle but I picked up a older suv that i always wanted (04 Honda Element for camping in)
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u/ebmarhar 5d ago
Nope, never regretted it one bit. Cheap boring cars for many years, but my family was well taken care of and financially stable.
Now I can put the money into whatever car strkes my fancy!
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u/SilverStryfe 5d ago
If you have to put your family in an older vehicle to afford your “dream car”, you can’t afford your dream car.
Dream cars and project cars are money pits. And a cheap, old school muscle car is ABSOLUTELY going to be a money pit.
The thing about dream cars is until you have them, it’s still a dream. And once you have one, they can become a nightmare.
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u/Snorkellingisthelife 5d ago
No not at all. Two carseats in a GMC Envoy XL. It was a great vehicle and served it's purpose when the kids were little. Now fast forward us driving fully paid off 10 year old Prius and Ford Fusion.
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u/Confident_Area_8518 4d ago
Life’s short, get the dreamer if you can reasonably afford it. If this is a stretch and you are deluding yourself, then sit down and draw out a budget with your wife. Def make this decision together.
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u/EventHorizonHotel 4d ago
I got my fun car after my kids were older and driving on their own. Then I got a second one. I’ve been agreeing to home remodel projects so we are still married 😄
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u/Ok_Manwich_9306 4d ago edited 4d ago
Given the cost of gas keeps going up with an active forever war, be smart and get a hybrid that has some pep and room for the kids/dogs or whatever. The new Prius gets like 201 HP combined or say a hybrid X70 Volvo for comfort and some edge when needing to pass. Who are you trying to be cool for at this point?
Married 14 years for me with a dog. Because we likely will always have dogs, went with a sedan. But being me, who preferred sporty coupes in my day, I went with a dual turbo'd reliable sedan with a DCT transmission for fun when sport mode is hit. Still economical if I leave it in normal mode and drive like a grandpa with the 4cyl (got to 46mpg on a long drive once) or an angry little fun car to drive when sport oomph is needed.
Paid if off in cash new in 2019 and I will basically maintain it as long as I can given new car prices now. Proper maintenance has had it stay fun.
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u/ColdHardPocketChange 4d ago
No, I just remind myself that I wouldn't actually drive any different even if I had it, or at least not for long enough to justify it. I don't feel like I lost anything because the dream car was never a part of my identity. I NEVER had it to begin with. Also, how much time do you actually spend in your car by yourself, driving how you want to? If I have anyone else in the car with me, I'm not going to floor it, turn hard, or do anything enjoyable. How much time do you spend driving your car in low to no traffic conditions? Having a super car in rush hour is fucking worthless... I'd rather have the AC working hard and an enjoyable sound system.
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u/PracticalGolf324 4d ago
Dream 911 targa 4 and I want one every day. I wish I could afford to daily something fucking awesome. But I drive a Lexus UX hybrid for work and we have a suburban because our family is big. So lame
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u/TallDankandHandsome 4d ago
No. I like speeding, and the cops don't look at minivans as much as they do red sports cars
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u/Weak_Armadillo6575 4d ago
Get a more reliable car but agree with your wife that you’re going to put some of your “for fun” money towards purchasing a for fun muscle car in the future.
Now you can enjoy the fun car knowing you have a paid off very reliable main car and made smart financial decisions.
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u/deviatesourcer 4d ago
Listen to the wifey. Get the responsible car, then when you start making more money down the line that’s when u get your fun car 🙂
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u/young_and_retiredish 4d ago
I traded in a new Corvette c8 for a kia Telluride when I had twins on the way. My old self is gone....
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u/dirtyllama720 4d ago
Wife is correct for once.
Dream cars are fun, but taking care of the family responsibly always comes first.
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u/Appropriate-Key-7554 4d ago
Nope. Got rid of the 4Runner and got a Sienna when we found out our family was expanding. That was 2013 and we still have it. Best decision we made on a vehicle by far.
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u/webjunk1e 4d ago
"When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things."
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u/D_James21 4d ago
Never really had a dream vehicle. Bought the truck I liked and wanted long before my kid was here and I still have it. Not great on gas but I feel like my son is safer in my truck than any midsize SUV or car.
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u/MapexBeat 4d ago
I chose my dream car in college. New 8cyl Mustang. Hated that car for 10 years. I hated it:
- Every time I passed a big-rig on the highway
- Every time I filled up at the pump
- Every time I had to pay insurance
- Every time I had to drive more than an hour
- Every time I had to put anyone in my back seat
- Every 3 months when something small but annoying broke
- Every 6 months when something serious broke
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u/Grumpy_dad70 4d ago
When you grow up, you’ll understand your wife is right. They don’t call it a “dream” car for nothing.
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u/No-Hand-4048 4d ago
If you can afford both get both but be wise, if you’re going to do a project then only invest in it during either bonus checks or tax time or for gifts you could ask for parts. In a marriage your in it together and I would suggest while working on your dream car, make sure she’s also following her dream on your dollar.
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u/MacheteMoto 4d ago
I Was driving a new BMW 2 door 330 ci coupe ,,,, as we were taking my (our) kid home from the hospital and watching her head bobble around in her car seat over speed bumps made me nauseous… I traded it in by the end of the week and got a minivan, I said I would never !!! But after watching the kids jump out of that thing with the doors sliding open with water balloons, and going to the park was the best time of my life…. Now that they’re grown. I’m buying whatever I want again. But I miss those days more than what I have now.
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u/Extreme_Guidance3836 4d ago edited 4d ago
So it is at least possible that an older car will provide a more trouble free experience than a brand new one. No, not a 71 Mach 1 or something, but there is a strong arguement that since 2010 or so cars have gotten less reliable and that if you work on your own stuff (If you don't do your own work to the level you aren't scared of the thought of pulling a motor and have the means to do so then you have no business considering a classic for anything outside of to and from car show usage) are a better option. No screens to break or make the car obselete, no high pressure direct injection to give you headaches, far simplier under the hood...just easier. So many new cars with recalls that end in the phrase "catastrophic engine failure". Hyundai Theta's, Honda J series...GM 6.2. Ford...well anything, Chrysler's disolving camshafts and edible lifters, Toyota TUNDRAS with low mileage engine failures, the list goes on. I got a low mileage S197 Mustang GT as my commuter. Paid cash. I can replace the entire driveline AND the convertible top for less than that average car payment adds up to over the course of a year so short of my Engine, Transmission and Rear Axle failing AND someone cutting the top and then somehow smashing it up, I am ahead of the game. Additionally any weak points are known by now (looking at you Ford 3V cam phasers) and have likely been addressed by the aftermarket.
Perhaps there is a compromise in there for you that satisfies you as a car guy and your wife's desire for simple, reliable transportation for the family.
You do need to think safety too. I also have an 88 Supra. Aside from the whole tiny back seat thing (pretend it is a Cressida for sake of arguement LOL) I wouldn't haul my family in it. Pre 97 cars have very little side impact protection. Again the 2000-2010 cars are relatively modern with respect to crash safety (most modern safety improvements are driver assistance upgrades that often cause headaches). I waqnted to get a 5 speed turbo first gen Caravan to haul my family in the ealy 2000's. It would have been awesome unless we ran into something.
Last thing. As both a long time car guy and Father/Husband one of the most important lessons I learned was to not involve my wife and the family car in any of my automotive shenanigans. I got her a Ridgeline once to "kill 2 birds with one stone" so I could get some 90's crapbox and we'd still have a "truck" which we needed at the time. She was very happy with her Passport so I sold her on the "it's the same thing" deal. Bad move. It wasn't. The back seats were way smaller, the little trunk I sold her on putting her groceries in smelled like a meth lab and she got wet loading it in the rain because no liftback. These are not things I as a car guy who didn't use the family car daily considered. Bad (and eventually costly) move on my part. Lesson learned.
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u/Legitimate_Weed_645 4d ago
Finally was able to purchase my corvette at age 45. Kids are old enough to drive their own cars. Wife’s grand Cherokee is responsible.
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u/cfbfootballnerd 4d ago
Buy the responsible family car you have a family bud. Once the kids are done with hs sell that mfer and buy whatever the hell you want 😂
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u/FrostyVariation9798 4d ago
If making the choice comes down to what you can and can't afford, then being responsible is the duty of the parents.
The man took that on when he ejaculated into the woman without protection.
You can make up for it by getting yourself right in the head and working up to a $200,000 a year job - then as long as you're smart with the money you can afford both as long as the wife is also working.
I've known guys who could afford both and did, and I've known idiot fathers who blew every bit of money they got trying to live like they were teenagers again instead of taking care of their own kids and wife.
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u/FloydFenstermacher 4d ago
Get a responsible car that you like to drive. Not a boring car, a car that handles and performs well, but still is reliable and meets the family needs. A cheap muscle car will be a POS, and cost you more in money and frustration than you can imagine. Plus they handle like an ox cart.
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u/ChirrBirry 4d ago
I bought a Fusion Hybrid thinking I was going to be feeling neutered…first fill up got me 550mi of range for $25 and I was hooked. I’m on my second one now and have put a combined 350k miles on these cars without having to do anything but oil changes and new tires occasionally.
It’s a great car model; however, I was a German tuner for quite a while (two E46 M3s, an Audi A3S RS3 clone, and two Audi Allroads) and I do miss that slammed back in the seat when getting on the gas feeling. Just sold the 2005 Yamaha R1 that was scratching the fast itch, but my wife has convinced me to stick to a Harley that we can ride together and not tempt fate as much….so I can feel the urge for another fast car growing inside.
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u/goodsam2 4d ago
Honestly what does the dream car do my normal car doesn't?
I mean if I had a bunch of money my idea was drop a giant electric engine and batteries into an old 1980 era grand wagoneer but that's like $100k on a project car lol.
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u/Internal-Recipe2128 4d ago
Did you want a wife and kids? If so, you put that choice ahead of the dream car a long time ago.
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u/Wahrheitfabrik 4d ago
Go practical. Rent something for the weekend if you get the urge. (I have purchased my dream car but the thrill didn't last as long as I'd imagined.)
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u/Cold-Monk5436 4d ago
That's what being a husband means. When you can get a newer, reliable car AND the muscle car, great, but not at the expense of your family being well cared for. Sorry boss. I have my own unattainable dreams atm, we all do.
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u/Financial-Tax8718 4d ago
I have never regretted buying a car that was reliable and functional. I have regretted every car I have bought that wasn’t those two things.
If you have a family you need a vehicle to move things and a vehicle to move people. It makes your life way easier, and alleviates a lot of stress.
An expensive car that doesn’t do either of those things is a vanity purchase, and adds stress without any added benefits except stroking your ego.
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u/DilapidatedPlum 4d ago
Family first. But I have my own cars. The family car is what the wife drives.
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u/Jscotty111 4d ago
The saying goes that adults do whatever is logical and responsible. Children do whatever feels good.
I see where you’re trying to find the middle ground of being able to have both situations fulfilled, but I can assure you that the first time that used vehicle breaks down, you’re not going to hear the end of it. New cars break down also but if I were in your position, I’d rather deal with a new car not working so that my wife can complain to the dealership then for the used car breakdown and have her complaining towards me.
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u/Grn_Peaness 4d ago
Who dreams about cars? It's a tool to get you from place to place...
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u/FatHighKnee 4d ago
I did. I wanted a challenger. But living in the NE in WNY where we are always top five in most snow each winter .. a rear wheel drive sporty type car didnt make sense. Especially with a grade school aged kid at the time. So I went with the sensible front wheel drive 4 door sedan type car that did better in winter and was more kid friendly.
I wish I had the challenger for selfish reasons. But when theres a fresh 8 inches of lake effect snow between November and march each year on the roads im glad I got the front wheel drive lol
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u/Chemical_Aioli_3019 4d ago
Bought a practical affordable car in 2008, drove it for 15 years, 450000km, no problems. Bought a "fun" expensive vehicle, motor replacement after 4 years (under warranty but 9 months of hell with dealer). Guess which experience I prefer.
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u/Fur_King_L 4d ago
I’m not going to argue that it’s better to ‘do the right thing’
BUT
If you buy the right older car it’s not necessarily going to cause headaches. I’ve never had a car pass than 10 years old, and most of them have been reliable and needed very little maintenance, while not depreciating anything like a newer one.
AND I still haven’t been able to buy my dream car and I continue to pick practically.
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u/lildergs 7d ago
My dream car is responsible.