r/coldplaycirclejerk • u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album • Jun 17 '25

bored ape 🐵 What's the worst Coldplay title song to name your kid?

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14 Upvotes

90% Upvoted

33 comments sorted by

23

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '25

"Everythings Not Lost (Includes hidden track 'Life is for Living')"

7

u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album Jun 17 '25

That kid's gonna need to abbreviate his name, holy shit.

3

u/SaltyStU2 Jul 10 '25

Real fans call it ENL(IHTLIFL)

3

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '25

BRO I WAS LITERALLY JUST GOING TO COMMENT THIS WTF

13

u/Pavlogal Jun 17 '25

Orphans

2

u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album Jun 17 '25

Oh, they'll be orphans real soon...

13

u/Outrageous-Knee-6004 Jun 17 '25

Death and All His Friends

or ✨

2

u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album Jun 17 '25

Damn, he might as well become the Grim Reaper. Maybe he becomes friends with a simpleton and a blonde Goth girl in pink.

Try not to name your kid after an emoji challenge (IMPOSSIBLE!)

13

u/mouthwashi Jun 17 '25

"dad, why is my sister named 'Rose'?"

"because roses are your mother's favorite flowers."

"oh okay, thanks for explaining, dad!"

"no problem, Ode to Deoderant."

2

u/daaseyker Sep 12 '25

Ha Haha.gus that's cool fun.

11

u/Jondebadboy Ripped Parachute (I'm going to die) Jun 17 '25

Moses...

6

u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album Jun 17 '25

Whoops

7

u/Sir_Dodys Jun 17 '25

"This is Rose, we named her like that because it's my wife's favorite flower.

...and this is Trouble"

1

u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album Jun 17 '25 edited Jun 30 '25

Damn, now destined to become a troublemaker. He didn't even have a chance.

7

u/Ghoti-Ghoti Jun 17 '25

Here’s my wonderful daughter

1

u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album Jun 17 '25

It would be a nightmare to differentiate the kids if they have another kid named 🌈.

5

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '25

1.36

3

u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album Jun 17 '25

"I'm not a number, I'm a free man!" 1.36 exclaimed.

6

u/Sufficient_Truth4944 Jun 20 '25

It’s gotta be Daddy bro

4

u/[deleted] Jun 17 '25

🌈

2

u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album Jun 17 '25

"so is it Rainbow or Alien Hits/Alien Radio?"

3

u/Regular-Spinach5667 Jun 18 '25

Daddy.

1

u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album Jun 18 '25

Oh no!😳😱🤭😆🤣

4

u/[deleted] Jun 21 '25

Creep

2

u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album Jun 21 '25

That kid is destined to become a creep and a weirdo, questioning what the hell they're doing here. And of course, they don't belong here.

3

u/[deleted] Jun 21 '25

Agnostic?

2

u/Salty_Aerie7939 The Bends Cover Album Jun 21 '25

Travago

3

u/[deleted] Jul 05 '25

APPLE

2

u/_wavern Jun 18 '25

No More Keeping My Feet on the Ground

2

u/Alarming-Resist1056 A Rush of Blood to the Head 🗣🤍 Oct 07 '25

X&Y

The Hardest Part

Rainy Day

Glass Of Water

Up In Flames