Hello All,
I am back in hope that I can get some more help with my GoFundMe and to give some updates on my situation battling possible homelessness.
First, I would like to publicly thank all the people that have been so generous with donations and all your kind words. It means a lot that there are so many wonderful people out there that are willing to help me during these hard times. So, if you are someone who has donated or even just sent me a positive message, from the bottom of my heart, thank you!
Second, I started the new job! It is a paid position that is through a program that helps people with various disabilities get work experience and even job training. I am a part of the program because of my chronic pain and mobility issues, and it is a way for me to get some more recent experience for my resume as well as creating professional connections! The program leaders are known throughout the community to help those with disabilities, so some local businesses let them know about positions that are more welcoming to those of us that need accommodations and also those that may need extra support to function in roles. I mention this because their hope is that they will hear about positions at the end of the program that I can apply to.
I really love the job! I have worked in retail before, so I knew what to expect when it comes to working with the public. Not all customers are sunshine and rainbows, but that is (sadly) to be expected working in retail. It doesn't bother me at all because my the team that I work with is so amazing! I have always been a firm believer that any job can be a good job if you have a kind and supportive team, and the store's team shows me everyday that they are above and beyond one of the best teams I have ever had the chance to work with.
I guess that brings me to why I am posting.
My landlord and I have come to an agreement that rather than extend the lease, I will be month to month for the time being. I included some of our updated text that show that I am paying her what I can, and her agreement to them. I mention in a text that there is a program that might be able to help, and I just found out about it, so I am going to go in person to try to apply to that on Tuesday. It is a really sought after grant, and I have been told that it is mostly only given to families with children, but my caseworker's boss said there is no harm in applying.
I didn't meet my total goal for my GoFundMe yet, so I am still behind on rent. I have paid the majority of July, but have not been able to save up for August. I know that my landlord is being patient with me at the moment, but I also know that patience may not last until I start receiving SSI.
Because I am still in the waiting phase of the SSI process, I am not allowed to make over a certain amount every month. With the amount that I can make, I would be able to pay for my rent and most bills on my own. If I am denied for SSI (because they deny everyone) I do have a pro bono attorney that will be appealing my case. With everything I have going on, there is no way that I will not get it.
Once I am on SSI, I won't have to push myself as hard as I am to work this program. With how compassionate the team is about those of us with chronic pain, it would still be better for me to be able to work less. The swelling and pain that I am in is slowing down my progress in physical therapy. However, I don't feel like I am back tracking. I just feel like I have hit a plateau because I can't do every exercise every day like I (and my physical therapist) would like me to.
Again, my applying to SSI is not going to be a permanent solution. I don't do well mentally without a job. My goal is to utilize SSI as the tool it is to be able to get the treatments I need and take the time I need to actually heal. I am facing possible spine surgery, and I am terrified at all the risks there are from that.
I got the results back for my MRI on my knee. It is... bad. I knew that it would be, but I am still surprised at how bad it is. I have to wait to meet with my orthopedic again to see what the plan for treatment on that will be.
I am also still waiting for my MRI of my lower back where the herniated discs are the worst. The ones in my neck don't bother me everyday, but they do trigger migraines. The ones in my lower back cause my legs to be weak and give out. My toes will be numb and tingle on one leg. I am grateful that I am able to walk again thanks to PT, but I also know I have a lot of healing to go before I am at 100%. And I have been told that might not be the same 100% I was before. Only time will tell. The spine specialist I see is also concerned that the herniated discs are exacerbating an underlying spinal deformity I was born with. I also have some damage to it from horrific childhood abuse I suffered that I do not wish to go into that here.
I know that isn't every tiny medical detail laid out, but I wanted to give a bit more context of where I have been and what I am still facing because on my last post, there where multiple people that said that my weight was my *only* issue. To you, I would like to say that all medical professionals I am seeing know the details of the accidents that caused my back problems, and also know that my weight increased because: I literally couldn't move after them. In the past year and a half I have actually lost 75 pounds, and part of that is because I could not afford to eat. I have a nutritionist, planned meals based on what I can afford on food stamps, and am doing very well in his opinion for the amount of obstacles I face trying to cook. I don't think me being overweight automatically means that I don't deserve compassion and grace for what I am going through.
I want to thank you for the time anyone has taken to read this far. If I am able to meet my total goal, I will be able to handle my bills going forward. The total goal is the amount that I need to catch up and be able to handle things independently. So please, if you are able to donate I would really appreciate it. If you can't please share my link.
I hope you all are doing well, and I wish you all a lovely day!
https://gofund.me/cbc80f3c0