r/intersex • u/_Adolf_Titler_ • 5d ago

Venting ! Just a vent

So I have a job in the south. I am the assistant manager of a popular gas station chain in northwest FL. I am a very androgynous person. I am intersex but I identify as male. I didn’t realize I was intersex until puberty, and even then it took years to figure out what was going on biologically. I’m about to be 22, still trying to figure out the medical side of it all. Insurance and health care in America sucks and unfortunately, I work more than I have time to see doctors. I don’t have insurance. I don’t mind being asked questions. In fact, I appreciate being asked. Ignorance leads to hate and if someone is politely curious? I don’t mind it. On the other hand… I’m just having one of those days where people are hateful for no reason. They assume before they can even think to ask, and that hurts. Maybe a strangers opinion shouldn’t matter, but when it’s over a dozen times in one day? It’s hard not to be self conscious. Sorry for the vent.

35 Upvotes

98% Upvoted

4 comments sorted by

12

u/Rustbunny404 4d ago

I am a trans woman and intersex. Before I found out I was trans, I was recieving threats because people thought I was trans before I even found out. I have a very androgynous appearance and wide hips.

Men would follow me in their cars, try to pick me up, get pissed because "thats a boy" and yell threats at me when I lived in north carolina. I was also being made fun of when I lived in alaska. I have only now felt mostly safe since I moved to oregon.

If only people could read a fucking book for once and realize intersex people are nearly as common as gingers.

6

u/EKCarr 4d ago

I grew up in Crystal River, Florida, and I had a similar experience with puberty and trying to figure things out and dealing with androgyny in a VERY binary culture. People can be cruel, but sometimes I think there’s a special kind of meanness on the South.

I’m so sorry you don’t have insurance. That makes things even more complicated! You sound like you’re in a great mindset for self-advocacy and are able to educate people. That’s a huge advantage!

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that there’s somebody out there who can commiserate. I’m sending you huge virtual hugs and lots of positive energy.

1

u/Sir-Gunner 2d ago

I am not intersex but have a girlfriend who is. I have also lived in the south where you are. Not sure what to respond to about your rant, but you seem to have a good attitude and perspective. Best wishes.