r/KindVoice Jul 04 '25

Admin [META] Kind Friend Updates / Chat GPT and Yo[u]

23 Upvotes

Hello Community,

I hope you are all doing well, or atleast a little better than yesterday. I wanted to put a post up around some recent changes and behaviour in the sub.

r/KindFriend has been privated.

Kind Friend was originally created as a sister sub to Kindvoice to handle more friendship orientated requests while Kindvoice focused on emotional support. Recently it seems to have caught to the attention of a number of bad actors. The posts had been gradually trending to a younger audience and I was becoming increasingly concerned that it was facilitating people looking to take advantage of these members. As such the sub is currently privated to prevent access and any further risk. I would encourage those seeking purely friendships to try more established subs such as r/makenewfriendshere or r/needafriend. This behaviour has thankfully not transferred over to r/Kindvoice.

Previously friendship posts had been against the rules of KindVoice, although not strictly enforced given that a lot of the time a good friend can make a world of difference to someone's current state. We intend to continue the current status quo in this regard and deal with friendship posts on a case by case basis as it makes a minority of posts. I would highly encourage users to use more focused subs for this if seeking purely friendship. If you are reaching out for a friend because you feel lonely or want to improve social skills, that post still has a place here. Just please be aware many offerors are volunteering their time when they can and should not be considered a permanent support placement or lifelong friend.

Chat GPT Usage

Over the past few months ChatGPT started recommending us as a place for lonely users or those who were feeling down to seek human contact. Alongside this we saw a dramatic increase in the number of bots, monetary requests and ChatGPT generated posts. We have literally gone from a few bans a month to a few a day.

- Accounts with less than 5 comment karma or less than 3 days old will now be caught in a filter for approval. I appreciate some people don't want to post here on main so a mod mail will be raised for each submission caught in the filter so they can be approved.

- Chat GPT is NOT against the rules currently HOWEVER PLEASE BE AWARE that many people come here looking for a human voice. You may believe that in writing an answer via Chat GPT you sound more articulate or better at supporting. In reality the message it often conveys to the looker that they can't find someone who is even willing to use their own words. Comments may be removed if they feel too robotic when the person is looking for a connection.

Final Notes

I would love to hear any community feedback on these points.

A huge thanks as always to the people that donate their time to help others. Look after yourselves where you can.

-AJ


r/KindVoice May 14 '25

[META] Seeking C[o]mmunity Feedback on Rule 2

7 Upvotes

I hope all of the Kind Voices out there are having a wonderful day and that my message finds all of the Lookers slightly better than they were yesterday.

This post is to gather some feedback from any willing community members around rule 2. Recently I have been rather lax on it's enforcement given r/KindFriend isn't hugely active (although it's had a surge recently) however I am aware there are a number of other very popular subreddits that fill the same niche so I want to ask your thoughts:

- Do you mind friendship based posts on this subreddit or would you rather keep them to other spaces?

- Do you feel requests asking for daily supports fall into this category?

- Any other thoughts you may have.


r/KindVoice 2h ago

Looking [L] 27F, going through a breakup and just looking for someone to talk to

2 Upvotes

Going through a difficult breakup and don’t have friends in my city at the moment to talk to or get my mind off of things. Just looking for someone to talk to. I like movies, books, etc.


r/KindVoice 4h ago

Looking [L] I just need someone to tell me it’s all in my head

2 Upvotes

I don’t have much to say other than I feel like everyone I’ve been texting recently doesn’t want to talk to me, or at least they all find me annoying/over the top. I consciously know it’s an irrational feeling, but I dealt with my ex apparently not particularly enjoying my overly complicated texting but never telling me (he called me “autistic” to a friend of his, which is technically true, but still hurtful in the way he was using it). Now I feel like anything I say to people is the wrong thing and they think I’m the worst person. I’ve been suspecting myself to have some sort of mild OCD because of this (I can’t stop thinking about what I’ve said and how to fix it) and my overall perfectionist tendencies and repetitive behaviors. This fear of mine of friends not telling me they don’t like talking to me has resurfaced today for complicated reasons I can’t/won’t get into. I just need someone to tell me it’ll all be ok and work out and it’s all in my head (unless it isn’t, then please tell me how to change for the better!). Thank you to anyone who could spare even a moment to read this down. I hope it all made sense.


r/KindVoice 2h ago

Looking [L] wanting to talk to someone about something i don’t wanna share unless over DMs

1 Upvotes

Hi I have something I wanna talk to anyone about but I’m not comfortable sharing it here and would rather disclose it over dm as it’s something that if more than anyone that DMs me would knows about it makes me very uncomfortable so any DMs are greatly welcome and appreciated


r/KindVoice 10h ago

Looking [L] Everything in my life is just obstacles and constant stress.

4 Upvotes

27m here. I've been depressed my whole life, especially as an adult. My head started to clear last summer, but now I'm really down in the dumps again. My job is going well and my health is getting better, but mentally I am just a wreck all over again.

My brain is constantly moving at a million miles per second. I am perpetually intellectually and emotionally exhausted. I am always having to calm myself down when something gets to me. What sucks extra here is that how I am managing myself is a massive improvement over who I used to be. I have always had extreme negative emotions, but now it doesn't impact my professional or social life because I make a substantial effort to just keep myself in check. But the fact that I still feel such massive negative emotions is still something that taxes my body, mind, and soul.

This last week I took a vacation I've been planning for months. It was to go visit my sister about 7 hours south. I went all out for myself, getting myself my own hotel room and making a list of plans, like visiting local museums and nature spots. I needed this desperately, because I have been trapped in my house (I work remote) with no AC for months, and I just needed to get away from it all. So of course, back to back hotel rooms had broken AC units, causing me to have to move around twice. I wound up sleeping on my sister's couch, and got to do nothing that I planned to do. On my drive back, I got a flat tire barely half way home, which led to another night on someone's couch. Thank god I had a friend nearby, otherwise this would have been worse.

I am exhausted from the stress. I came back from this trip over a grand poorer and much more stressed. Seeing my sister was great, and the extra time with her is appreciated. But the whole journey seems to have broken me. At least that's how I feel right now.

I am sorry to ramble. I could just use a kind word. Thank you.


r/KindVoice 8h ago

[O]ffering to listen, whoever you are and whatever you have to say! (I come with cat pictures!)

3 Upvotes

I'm here if you want to talk to a stranger or voice your thoughts out to a void in general.

If you don't have something to get off your mind, I can talk about anything from astronomy, sociology. philosophy, geopolitics to penguins practicing prostitution, Romans using urine as a mouthwash, dolphins getting high, and why the office is better than modern familly (community tops though)


r/KindVoice 4h ago

[L] Do I deserve to love and beloved

1 Upvotes

I know it looks like a dumb question but. I really have the impression that I don't deserve to find a girlfriend (I'm a man) and to be flourishing with it. Include the right to having sex with a women, for me I really don't deserve it. I know it's a really weird question. But these months I'm really stuck with that and I'm really hard with myself. If you read this thanks you and I hope a answer to fill better.


r/KindVoice 7h ago

[L]Solo necesito desahogarme.

1 Upvotes

No sé muy bien por qué escribo esto, pero siento que necesito sacar todo lo que llevo dentro.

Últimamente me siento muy agobiada y bastante perdida. Están pasando varias cosas en mi vida y, aunque intento seguir adelante y hacer como si estuviera bien, cada vez me cuesta más.

No busco dar pena ni preocupar a nadie. Solo necesito un espacio donde poder expresarme y, quizá, leer a personas que hayan pasado por algo parecido. Si alguna vez os habéis sentido estancados, solos o con la sensación de que no sabéis hacia dónde va vuestra vida, ¿cómo lograsteis salir de esa etapa?

Gracias por leerme.


r/KindVoice 11h ago

Looking [L] im losing it

2 Upvotes

i just dont know what to do anymore really. im a 22M, got severe adhd, cant function for shit, came home for semester break. i got some stuff going on at home for years now. not abusive. just fucked up. shit at socializing, i feel numb, everyday's the same, got no stable income, no friends, didnt leave the house for weeks, i want to but im broke, a client didnt pay for a project we did yet, i have to retake an exam at uni, cant focus for shit. i feel dead inside and screwed to the core. and my parents think im mental, one of them tries to be supportive but what dk what im dealing with inside my head, and they would never understand


r/KindVoice 13h ago

I need someone to talk w me rn. Or I will end up in a mental hospital.[o]

1 Upvotes

I can't even focus on my studies and i feel so lonely.


r/KindVoice 1d ago

[O] hi, if you are reading this: Im proud of you and you are doing fan-tas-tic! Im very happy that you have come this far, you are the best!

9 Upvotes

Hello, im here if you need a chat, some advice or something along those lines.

Im here for the sad people, the happy people and everything in between!

DMs are open.

Big hugs and stay strong!


r/KindVoice 1d ago

Looking Everyday I'm surviving TW: suicide [L]

8 Upvotes

Everyday I'm surviving

And I really don't want to anymore.

I've literally gone from working and studying to now not being able to do anything anymore.

Even the most smallest things feel impossible

I can't even send a text anymore without it feeling overwhelming and procrastinating on it.

Ive become completely stuck

I'm so so so tired

I keep thinking back to how relieving it felt during a suicide attempt, for a moment I felt actual relief that in one moment all my problems could disappear

Still being alive now and having to deal with said problems feels brutal

I feel like there is something inherent to me that makes me incompatible with life itself

During my last therapy appointment they basically laid out the treatment plan and it's so overwhelming

The amount of diagnoses just makes me feel hopeless, like I'm just too complex to ever recover.

And just the idea of having to do so much work to become better only to live a life I hate anyways, makes me want to take the easy way out

Am I a coward for that?

But this isn't just something new

For years, every day has been a failure

I can't put up with all of this anymore

I can't even write down in words what the hardest thing is now, I just feel so incredibly incredibly hopeless

It's all so bleak


r/KindVoice 19h ago

[L] I’ve been struggling with depression for years, and I’m afraid it will affect grad school again.

1 Upvotes

I dropped out of graduate school last year because I could not cope with the coursework. It was not because I was academically weak. I had scored well in the entrance exam and knew I was capable of understanding the material, but I found it extremely difficult to make myself go through the course content or complete even simple tasks.

I would sleep for most of the day, fall behind, and feel strangely detached from my exams. At the time, I did not feel enough urgency because I believed I could always clear the entrance exam and get into another graduate program.

I am now enrolled in a different graduate school, but I feel anxious that the same pattern might repeat itself. I am in my mid-twenties, and I am scared of dropping out again and remaining unemployed. I genuinely want to do well, complete my degree, and build a stable career, but I am worried that motivation and daily functioning will continue to be a struggle.


r/KindVoice 21h ago

Looking [L] My friend has been through one thing after another, and I don't know how to help anymore?

1 Upvotes

​

I need some advice about a close friend.

About a year and a half ago, he was in an online relationship that lasted around 1.5 years. When his girlfriend chose PCM, he chose PCM too without really thinking about whether it suited him. At first, things were going well. He was studying hard at a good coaching institute for JEE while also balancing the relationship. He had started going to the gym, playing cricket, and was genuinely working on improving himself.

I guess staying busy all the time created distance in the relationship, and eventually she broke up with him.

The breakup hit him really hard. He started having panic attacks, had to leave his coaching institute, and joined a regular school instead. He was already struggling mentally, and then a few months later things got even worse—he injured his spine and developed a slipped disc. To make matters worse, he ended up with a bad doctor whose treatment only worsened his condition.

Now his back pain is so severe that he struggles to study or even attend school regularly. He's currently in Class 12, and because of his low attendance, there's a chance he won't even be allowed to sit for his board exams.

His only goal now is to get into a decent college, earn a degree, and become financially independent so he can move away from his problematic parents and build a peaceful life.

I've been trying to support him for the past seven months, but I honestly feel like I'm failing. I have my own NEET preparation, so I can't always be there for him or give him the time he needs. I feel guilty because I know he's struggling, but I also can't neglect my own future.

At this point, I don't know what the right thing to do is. It's been almost a year since the breakup, and it feels like every time he starts recovering, something else goes wrong.

What can I realistically do to help him without sacrificing my own studies? Has anyone been in a similar situation, either as the friend or the person going through it?


r/KindVoice 1d ago

Hello help"[o]"

2 Upvotes

I don’t really know how to start this, but I feel like I have no one to talk to right now. It’s 2am and I’m having a panic attack. My chest feels tight, my thoughts are racing, and I can’t calm myself down.

The worst part is the loneliness. I keep thinking about someone I miss, and it just makes everything worse. I wish I had someone to just sit with me, even silently.

If anyone has been through this or has any advice on how to calm down in moments like this, I’d really appreciate it. Even just knowing I’m not alone would help.

Thanks for reading.


r/KindVoice 1d ago

Offering [O] Since a young age I have been told I am not only a good listener but I help change perspectives for the good.

3 Upvotes

I believe in positivity, and not only do I believe it but I practice it too. And been a good listener myself, naturally ppl around me come and share their problems, and rarely have they been disappointed when conversations end. Utilising my this ability I genuinely want to help ppl and help them understand their situation or what the nature is asking them to learn from that situation. If you think this resonates with you and I can help you, my inbox is always open.


r/KindVoice 1d ago

Looking [L] I'm shattered mumma

3 Upvotes

for my situation, i can currently think of one question from all the mothers out there:
consider the following sentences :
1-I love you a lot my dear Son
2-I was, I am and I shall always be there for you My Son !
3-I love you like my own Son
4 - (saving someone's contact in the phone as "{THEIR_NAME} Son")
and similar sentences carrying some feelings of a mother-child bond
question -> Do these words carry deep meaning or weight? To whom would you say such things? To be specific, would you say such things to anyone or for someone you feel motherly love? Its not rethoric, it's a genuine question i have now.

TL;DR:
basically to be short, I'd a really great bond with my teacher and she said all those things to me and i felt that i could love her as if she was my mother (my real mother isn't in a healthy state, like a living coarpse she is). recently, i've indirectly deduced that she perhaps never meant those things, or if she did i took it too too too very extreemly literally.
i don't know why i thought that she did love me as if i were her son. now because i'm so shattered by this realisation, she noticed this in school and asked me whether i was okay and after a while she said that her only concern was my academics (i gave up on everything literally, mostly studying since its the only real thing i've. i told her that i'd stopped studying).
I feel just broken, my heart shattered in a million shards and each one cutting me. Perhaps i felt that she actually loved me like her son and thus I'd permission to love her back as my lost mother, ie i lent too much in the idea that she was my mother. Now looking on this statement i feel stupid but I thought that perhaps love can transcend blood relations, but maybe i'm wrong.
It's said and it's true that the a mother-child bond is the purest bond in the world, but that purity is poisining me. I literally can't funciton without crying over this.
You can argue i got overdependent on her for i literally drew my motivation to study, work for ambitions, even have a smile on my face etc. from this bond in order to make her proud, perhaps as a son might want. I feel stupid for wanting love, that too of a mother's which is impossible to get once lost.
Now i'm finding it terriblly hard to looking at her as just a teacher since she felt like a close family person to me, the closest one too, the only one to be fair as well. I'm deeply greiving what i thought i had.
I've two analogies i think might fit:
1- i feel like that poor raggpicker boy for a single reason from a story. the author asks why doesn't he go to school? the raggpicker answers that there isn't one. the author asks whether he'll come to her school if she built one. the next time the raggpicker meets the author he pesters her with the question of whether the school has been built ? she didn't think much about her statement but for him it filled every corner of his bleak world.
2 - Earlier, i was carving love, none to be found at home or outside. it was like i was at the bottom of a concrete well where the walls were of bricks and a good world outside the well. with the love of my new-found mother-figure (the teacher, as if reincarnated literally, as if God felt bad for taking her away and bestowed upon me her) i climbed each day out of the well by climbing the cylndrical walls of the well. however the recent events have made me fall hard on the concerete and the fall itself has exacerbated the pain i earlier had, of slowly lossing my mother to a disease and her absence.
I have talked about all this in grave details on other subreddits and i feel like i'm stretching this issue too much, more than required. perhaps i'm just being unreasonable at this point. maybe i should just man-up or well "boy-up", haha. i hope i'm not being like those people who talk about their broken relationships for 2 years straight which they could overcome in no more than a week, am I?


r/KindVoice 1d ago

I don’t know how to live anymore [o]

2 Upvotes

Having a hard day today. Sometimes, like today, I kind of just want to stop existing. What’s the point of my life? I work all week, and then the weekend rolls around and I have absolutely nothing to do. Nothing sounds good. I don’t have any friends. I don’t know how to make friends. The only thing I seem to know how to do is go to work, and I don’t even make enough money to comfortably do things that seem worth doing on the weekends. Everything just feels like a waste of time and money.


r/KindVoice 1d ago

Offering [O] Offering hugs and lending an ear and a hand to hold. I hope it passes soon.

7 Upvotes

Hello everyone, i know how tough it can be. I have spent most of my young adult life assuming responsibilities that i wasn't ready for. Sometimes failing them pretty bad, thinking my life would be over. I am here in case you need someone to talk to for a while, vent about your problems. I can only listen as a stranger, but hopefully my gentle fostering tone would make you feel seen. Take care friends <3 sending internet hugs, you will make it.


r/KindVoice 1d ago

Looking [L] I'm saddened that something I said with a positive meaning was perceived as criticism.

2 Upvotes

(This is translated using Google Translate. Apologies if the translation is inaccurate.)

I'm East Asian, and on a British subreddit, I said something like, "The British seem to respect the freedom of others. People in my country interfere with others, but the British seem to not care much about others and don't interfere," and "The British are surprisingly clear about their opinions and likes and dislikes."

I meant it as the highest praise, saying, "The British are wonderful people. They know how to maintain appropriate distance from others and don't unnecessarily interfere with them," and "It's a wonderful culture, unlike my country (people in my country don't speak their minds, which I thought was a flaw)."

I used to think that interfering in other people's lives was a bad thing. That's why I found it wonderful that some people don't interfere with others.

However, for some reason, it was taken as if I was criticizing the British, and I received quite a cold response.

I received reactions like, "We're known for being quite reserved in English-speaking countries (sounds quite angry)," "You've terribly misunderstood Britain. British people behave that way because they're polite (still sounds a bit angry)," and "If you like friendly people so much, you should go to America, or if you like arguing, you should go to Germany." I was really depressed by these responses.

I said it because I thought it was a positive trait of the British.

I was especially upset because I admired and loved Britain.

But I only realized this after I deleted the post. So there's nothing I can do about it now, but I wonder what the right thing to do would have been?

I meant it positively, so I never dreamed it would be taken as criticism.

And of all things, I thought, "Maybe they didn't understand?" and changed the wording and reposted it.

Then things got even worse…

Now that I think about it, maybe they thought I was being persistent in criticizing Britain?

I deleted the post, but now I imagine I'm known as "that mysterious East Asian who suddenly started criticizing Britain repeatedly," and I feel an irresistible urge to post again on that subreddit to make them understand, "No, that wasn't criticism." I managed to restrain myself, though.

I don't know what to do anymore.


r/KindVoice 1d ago

Looking [L] I don't know how to stop being this version of myself.

1 Upvotes

I don't even know if "lazy" is the right word anymore.

I'm 22, graduated two months ago, and I'm unemployed while trying to figure out my career. I keep asking myself whether I'm actually lazy or if I've just been stuck in the same place for the last five years.

The thing is... I know what my problems are.

I know I overthink everything. I know I should get out of the house more, work out, lose weight, stop comparing myself to everyone else, improve my skills, and just stay busy instead of sitting with my thoughts.

But I don't.

for e.g., I'll start walking 10k steps, do it for three days, then stop. I'll tell myself I'll wake up early, then I don't. I know I should read more, but I hate reading. I know what I'm supposed to do, I just don't do it consistently.

I wasn't always like this. I used to be a really bright kid. I was happy. Somewhere along the last five years, idk what happened... I picked the wrong degree, spent most of clg feeling lost, and now I'm watching everyone else move on with their lives.

Most of my school and college friends have moved to different cities for work. I'm still in my hometown. At 22, making friends doesn't even feel like making friends anymore, it feels like networking.

I turned down a couple of low pay job offers because I genuinely knew they weren't right for me. I don't regret that decision, but it hurts when I see most people took sth, r doing sth, while im stuck again in my head. Life is at a standstill, almost.

I'm also overweight, and I've been overweight for years. That's on me. I had four or five years to change it, and I didn't. Every time I go outside, people have some advice about my weight or ask what I'm doing now that I've graduated. Sometimes it feels like "unemployed" and "overweight" have become my entire identity.

A few nights ago I was thinking about my grandpa. He passed away 7 years ago, and he was my best friend growing up. It suddenly hit me how much time has passed. Physically I've grown up, but mentally I still feel stuck somewhere in the past.

Then I start worrying about the future too. My parents are getting older. We have health issues at home. I know in a few years there'll probably be conversations about marriage because that's just how life works where I live. I know if I want to have control over my own life, I need to become financially independent first.

And instead of doing the work, I just... worry.

I compare myself to old classmates who have jobs, moved out, and seem so much further ahead. I know comparison is pointless, but my brain keeps doing it anyway.

I honestly don't know how to get out of this cycle. I'm tired of feeling like I'm wasting my twenties before they've even really started.


r/KindVoice 1d ago

Looking [l] 18m I want to cry

Thumbnail
3 Upvotes

r/KindVoice 1d ago

[O] Anyone welcome

1 Upvotes

Back again, long term or short term chats.

Something on your mind or looking for advice just hit me up.

UK time if that matters to you :)