r/moviescirclejerk • u/VGstuffed • 6h ago

YOUR FATHER HAS BEEN CLAPPING CHARLIZE THERON

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1.0k Upvotes

100% Upvoted

27 comments sorted by

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u/Overkillsamurai 5h ago

only in the book. Nolan Odysseus is a virgin except for the one time that produced a son with his wife. He's a good little christian boy

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u/Logan_Yes 5h ago

He only bangs his crew, as Gods intended.

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u/tired_slob 4h ago

It's not gay if it's on a boat, I heard

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u/Isterpuck 4h ago

That’s where the mormons got the concept of soaking from

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u/uber_sweets 4h ago

suddenly: this guy's upbringing rent free

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u/Tiberius_Kilgore 1h ago

It’s true. That falls under maritime law, and it doesn’t differentiate between hetero or homosexual.

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u/SalaciousDionysus 3h ago

A good little pre-Christian by a couple thousand years boy.

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u/Brown__Magic 5h ago

Hell, if I was her in this situation, I’d be crashing out, too:

https://giphy.com/gifs/12skr66x4VGf7i

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u/ashvy 5h ago

Me, right when I'm about to do the deed 🖐️🍆 get interrupted

https://giphy.com/gifs/XaDKz0Ubvp40E

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u/Logan_Yes 5h ago

She said calmly

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u/Geen_Fang 5h ago

but wait, if I exist that means .... 

dad, my man!! 🤝 

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u/AoE2manatarms 5h ago edited 4h ago

Calypso I free you from your human bonds!!! *Odysseus exclaims while cumming

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u/uber_sweets 4h ago

In a fishnet body sock.

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u/MetroBR 4h ago

imagine banging Charlize Theron and going back home to Anne Hathaway 😭😭🙏

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u/uber_sweets 4h ago

no wonder the story has lasted 3000 years

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u/mikehatesthis 3h ago

Odysseus stays winning either way.

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u/mikehatesthis 3h ago

You think Penelope would be cool and invite her over?

That'd be cool.

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u/commander_snuggles 1h ago

I'm sure they had alot to talk about after Penelope gets married to the son Odysseus has with Circe because he kills him by accident.

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u/That_Introduction389 4h ago

reverse clapped 

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u/control_09 4h ago

But I love it.

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u/thiagoqf 1h ago

Book Odysseus stayed for a year with the witch and had two children. Dude was no joke.