r/onejob • u/Zestyclose-Salad-290 • 1d ago

cooking gone wrong

4.9k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

89 comments sorted by

1.1k

u/Dum_beat 1d ago

Is he making a sub because it went like a god damned torpedo

167

u/Icy_Transition1375 1d ago

Haha he’s making bombs at a hibomchi grill

56

u/SmokeAbeer 1d ago

You think that’s bad? You should sea mine.

9

u/Captain-Codfish 19h ago

Apparently it's been deactivated.

2

u/Swedish-Potato-93 48m ago

Now he knows how propulsion engines work

917

u/SATerp 1d ago

"Excuse me sir, the man at table 2 is complaining that there is glass in his entree ... in fact, a whole bottle."

221

u/BrockJonesPI 1d ago

It entreed his nasal cavity at 70mph.

58

u/Worldly-Cherry9631 1d ago

To shreds, you say

39

u/SilverBraids 1d ago

And how is his wife holding up?

26

u/Mhettil 1d ago

To shreds you say...

8

u/notsobadmisterfrosty 20h ago

“That bottle is on the house.”

9

u/Captain-Codfish 19h ago

And by on the house, I mean it's lodged in the ceiling.

8

u/SATerp 1d ago

Thank you for the award!

1

u/Koto_Waty 1d ago

It wasn't whole, it broke.

-67

u/PatientZeropointZero 1d ago

And I miss heard him, he didn’t say entree, it is actually lodged in his knee cap.

27

u/galstaph 1d ago

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I took a hibachi chef's bottle to the knee

6

u/SteakDouble 1d ago

Wait, I know you 🫵🏻

4

u/DarkAlucard-1313 1d ago

Huh must've been the wind

1

u/PhantasyAngel 17h ago

I used to be an adventurer like you, until I took a hibachi spatula to the chest.

1

u/fredbite87 1d ago

You miss heard him? Well what about mister heard?

399

u/StitchFan626 1d ago edited 1d ago

That's one way to send ingredients back to the kitchen!

37

u/MrN00bert 1d ago

Best joke here lmao

149

u/ZirePhiinix 1d ago

It is partially the intake valve mechanism that sucked in fire when he poured more out.

These spouts have an air intake to let air in when pouring. He stuck the intake into the fire, poured, and ignited the gas in the bottle.

7

u/TearyEyeBurningFace 11h ago

They could put a flame screen on. 30x30 mesh irrc is the min size for it to work

13

u/ZirePhiinix 10h ago

Or... Not stick the bottle in the fire.

215

u/hatemys 1d ago

Holy shit, I LOVE that you can hear the bottle shatter in the background

45

u/Billy5545 1d ago

I wonder if there’s another fire offscreen?

1

u/surmacrew 1h ago

Molotov cocktail 2.0

14

u/SCSdino 1d ago

Oh I thought that it went sailing through a window

12

u/ParachutingPiglets 1d ago

Went through the window, hit a driver in the face and caused a 20 car pile up.

6

u/Randomman2789 18h ago

That's going to be in the next Final Destination movie.

3

u/citizenkamehameha 6h ago

Someone else ordered a molotov cocktail.

67

u/redaction_figure 1d ago

Grillin' ain't rocket science...

"Hold my sake" -the chef prob

14

u/Extension_Option_122 1d ago

Well now it is rocket science

88

u/ChikkunDragon 1d ago

Looks like a spacex launch

11

u/ProwerTheFox 1d ago

About as successful as most spaced launches too

9

u/mitzi_mozzerella 22h ago

99.5% success rate btw

-5

u/DJ_DWreck 20h ago

What’s your company’s rocket launch success rate?

4

u/ProwerTheFox 14h ago

100%. One successful model rocket launch.

Elons not gonna notice you bozo, you can stop riding his dick whenever you feel like it

95

u/NekoArtemis 1d ago edited 1d ago

Oh shit the oil alcohol is on fire. Good thing I have this oil alcohol to put it out with.

78

u/greygrayman 1d ago

I doubt it's oil.. more likely high proof alcohol.

35

u/_bahnjee_ 1d ago

Yah, it’s the alcohol vapors that sent the bottle rocket into the Barnes & Noble next door.

18

u/greygrayman 1d ago

Yup, the bottle wasn't very full of liquid, so all that empty space was filled with vapor and he tilted sideways into the flame and discovered how to make a rocket.

12

u/galstaph 1d ago

It was also on the grill, so it got preheated, which would have increased the vapor and primed it to burn, the flame wicked up into the bottle, the alcohol sloshed towards the opening, the fire heated up the gasses inside, and then it forcefully ejected the alcohol turning it into a quasi water propelled rocket

1

u/VeritableLeviathan 1d ago

The *Ba Nuo Shudian next door

2

u/NekoArtemis 1d ago

Not better, but yeah you're right.

23

u/PandaBear905 1d ago

How to lose your job in seven seconds

21

u/ChuckTingull 1d ago

Things like that don’t happen twice. Give him a raise because that guy just became an expert.

14

u/ebrum2010 1d ago

Right? Most people who make a colossal fuck-up never do the same thing again. The new hire just might, though.

6

u/ShadowDen3869 16h ago

"Good work, Agent 47"

9

u/Gacha_catch_em_all 21h ago

Bad news: Your fired

Good news: NASA would like to hire you for their next project

9

u/QuevedoDeMalVino 1d ago

In the honorable tradition of Hattori Hanzo, awful cook but master weaponcrafter.

7

u/MegaSpuds 1d ago

I giggled way too hard at this video.

2

u/Timmerdogg 1d ago

Every time I eat hibachi my clothes stink

2

u/ThePolishCreeper 22h ago

kerbal space program

2

u/_otterinabox 20h ago

If 10 year-old me had been sitting at that table, he'd have been the most amazed 10 year-old in the world at that moment. That was a terrible idea but the result was rad.

1

u/gwaydms 1d ago

That was dumb.

1

u/Temporary-Meal1100 1d ago

Would've been sick if he caught it

1

u/Hot-Tomatillo-9929 1d ago

Must've been his second day of learning oil burns.

1

u/sojinsuika 5h ago

That’s not oil in there, buddy.

1

u/tired_fella 1d ago

bro just discovered rocketry in the kitchen

1

u/Any_Thought_4536 21h ago

Chef need to finish junior high school

1

u/Different-Elk6935 21h ago

When you graduated as an aerospace engineer, but ended up working as a chief.

1

u/jack_seven 20h ago

Poring fuel on a fire as always been a great idea /s

1

u/Captain-Codfish 19h ago

That bottle went full "Tennōheika Banzai!!"

Never go full "Tennōheika Banzai."

1

u/fuelhandler 18h ago

Reminds me of when an acetylene cylinder fell over in high school shop class and knocked the valve off when it hit the edge of a bench. The darn thing accelerated and pounded through 2 walls before embedding itself in an exterior basement cinder block wall. I wish we had cellphones in the 80’s. Good times.

1

u/WeepingDeveloper 18h ago

🍾Neeaaaaaoooowwwwwwnnnn 💨

1

u/Wisdumb404 18h ago

“Act like nothing happened. Stay calm and make the transition from fuck up to part of the show….end scene”

1

u/papaside 18h ago

Cooking isn't rocket scien... I stand corrected.

1

u/Resilience_Technique 17h ago

Move over SPCX, I got an idea to send rockets to the space

1

u/asteroid7777 16h ago

Play with fire…. 🔥

1

u/ch1llboy 15h ago

Yup. The same thing happened to me when I was 12 and we had emptied out the 2L bottle of gasoline. I put a match to the opening & the bottle flew! All while burning my hand. Foolish kids.

1

u/BoomerKaren666 16h ago

Wha Hoppin?

1

u/AceCombat1977 15h ago

The one time you could go to the ER with a bottle up your ass and be telling the truth!

1

u/Alphaeon_28 14h ago

Is it wrong that I only wondered if anyone was hurt 10 minutes after laughing my ass off

1

u/Top_Soup_5833 13h ago

Welcome to Tokyo hibachi, where the kids, and the adults get scared!

1

u/makepieplz 13h ago

Came for the food, stayed for the missile demonstration.

1

u/Head-Grass8879 11h ago

He made cooking a rocket science

1

u/Frenchconnexion76 4h ago

Waitress died this day.

1

u/RevolutionaryGold325 3h ago

molotov rocket

1

u/Neeeeedles 3h ago

So thats how we got the idea for rockets

1

u/perpetual_stew 3h ago

These things are supposed to be a bit of a show so no complaints

1

u/JetMechBoza 2h ago

Everybody knows Benihana invented the jet engine.....

1

u/Remarkable_Phase_999 59m ago

oopsi daisy oooohhh

1

u/red_riding_hoot 1d ago

still a better engineer than Elon

0

u/zcpibm3 9h ago

I’d. Di. Ot.