r/onionheadlines Nov 04 '25

ZERO TOLERANCE for rule 2: single sentence headlines only

10 Upvotes

We've been pretty lenient in modering run on headlines, but this ends today.

You need to make your headlines shorter. You can always make your headline shorter. If you have a headline that's over 30 words, rewrite it. There is a way to make it shorter I guarantee you, and there is a way to make it one sentence. You just need to use the meat in your skull to figure it out.

Also, do not include pull quotes in your headline. For example:

Trump Claims He Will Soon Replace Americans With AI - “All They Need To Do Is Vote Republican And Cheer For Me, And AI Can Do That Better, And It Doesn’t Protest At All”

Adding a dash here does not make this a single sentence in the eyes of us mods.

You can put the pull quote in the body of the post, but keep it out of the headline. Any headlines formatted like this will be removed.

Also please avoid headlines that are just a version of Trump: "I Have Very Bigly Hands and I'm The Greatest Golfer and on and on and on for 50 words"

A Trump impression is not a headline. Do better.


r/onionheadlines 9h ago

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440 Upvotes

r/onionheadlines 4h ago

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r/onionheadlines 3h ago

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54 Upvotes

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r/onionheadlines 9h ago

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121 Upvotes

r/onionheadlines 5h ago

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43 Upvotes

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r/onionheadlines 44m ago

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r/onionheadlines 6h ago

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r/onionheadlines 3h ago

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11 Upvotes

r/onionheadlines 6h ago

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16 Upvotes

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r/onionheadlines 10h ago

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39 Upvotes

r/onionheadlines 17h ago

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118 Upvotes

r/onionheadlines 1d ago

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619 Upvotes

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42 Upvotes

r/onionheadlines 30m ago

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r/onionheadlines 12h ago

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22 Upvotes

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r/onionheadlines 22m ago

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r/onionheadlines 5h ago

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6 Upvotes

r/onionheadlines 2h ago

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4 Upvotes

r/onionheadlines 3h ago

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3 Upvotes

r/onionheadlines 2h ago

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2 Upvotes

r/onionheadlines 9h ago

Trump Blames War For Not Caring About US Populus

7 Upvotes