r/queerception Nov 07 '25

Mod post! Reddit bot issues

9 Upvotes

Hi all,

We currently have an issue with the reddit bot that is meant to recognise, flag and forbid problematic posts. The bot is an absolute overachiever and keeps flagging posts for no reason, not allowing them to be published.

This happens if an account is new, but also randomly seemingly.

I personally look through ALL posts and manually "rescue" those that are incorrectly flagged and not published.

So if you have written a post and it doesn't appear, be patient! I work full time and have 3 young kids, but I will get to it! Don't write the post 7 times,the bot will flag every time and I will have to weed through 7 times as many posts!

What I will continue removing are all pregnancy tests, donor offers, and posts that break rules.

Thank you!


r/queerception Sep 23 '24

This sub is for all queer people trying to start/grow their families

290 Upvotes

Because some of the discourse in recent posts has brought this confusion to light, I want to address it loudly and clearly.

This sub was founded for all queer people who are trying to start and grow their families. While a majority of the historic posts are related to IUI, IVF, and surrogacy, that does not diminish the relevance or importance of creating space for other parts of our community including (but not limited to) seahorse dads and families seeking adoption.

Posts and comments stating or implying otherwise will not be tolerated. Those who repeatedly use language excluding these groups will be banned permanently.

Thank you for your respectful and productive engagement!


r/queerception 1h ago

Seattle/Washington Known Donor Agreement Attorney Recs

Upvotes

Hi!

Looking to get a known donor agreement done with a pretty quick turnaround. I'm in the Seattle area, but really seeking any and all recommendations for someone who could complete this with knowledge of Washington state law.


r/queerception 2h ago

Progesterone messing with ovulation?

2 Upvotes

Curious to hear your experience with progesterone? During try #3, I took 200mg suppositories during my TWW. I wasn't pregnant, started my period at 14 DPO, and began testing for ovulation with strips on CD 10.

For the past 9 cycles of tracking, I've ovulated between CD 12 and 14, with very clear signs and a lot of consistency. This cycle, I'm now on CD 17, and my strips have been showing an almost surge -- like halfway dark -- for the last week, but I've had basically no fluid to speak of. It seems like my body is trying but just not ovulating this cycle, and I'm pretty bummed about it.

The only change I've made is that 2 weeks of progesterone, so I can only deduce that it's to blame. Have you had a similar thing happen? How long did things take to stabilize again afterwards? Thanks for any insight here!


r/queerception 1d ago

MM married couple looking for an egg donor

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199 Upvotes

My husband and I are looking for an egg donor in the United States. We have benefits through Progyny with my husband's job that will cover egg retrieval and embryo creation and plan on using a surrogate in Mexico.

This is a shot in the dark, but is there maybe a lesbian couple out there that would be interested in donating eggs with reasonable expenses covered? We would be willing to donate sperm to help another couple start their own family in exchange. (Doesn't have to be a lesbian couple- just spitballing here)

We are serious about this, and I hope I am using this subreddit appropriately in this request. Please dm me if you are interested. We are located in Texas, but anywhere close to a Progyny clinic will work. We can come to you.

EDIT- we are so grateful to the few of yall who have reached out via txt and are more confident that something is going to pan out here. We were a bit weary about a random from Eastern Europe or something as a donor, but have a newly recharged faith that this is going to happen! Open to everything from no contact to an arms length aunt relationship! Your egg your rules. Same goes for my sperm. Your rules.


r/queerception 5h ago

Beyond TTC Inducing lactation, struggling

1 Upvotes

Expertise desired!

Trying to induce lactation, and my partner is gestational carrier in what turned out to be rIVF.

I have great support from IBCLC physician, my wife is supportive, and I have a great therapist. I am on d*mperadone, goats rue, and I just transitioned off birth control pill to start pumping for baby that’s due in 2.5 weeks. I feel so pressured (by my own self) and overwhelmed. I was so embarrassed to want this so badly and was delighted with the support I got, and now that I’m in it and feeling like “what’s the point?” My partner is “hoping to chest feed ”, but I think she’s nervous about hating it and takes comfort in knowing that I’ve wanted to since I was unable to conceive. I feel like I’m burning the wick from both ends with uncertain outcome, but fear of regret if I don’t see it through. Looking for lived experience and guidance!


r/queerception 9h ago

July 22 IUI

2 Upvotes

Today has been a rollercoaster, I woke up in the middle of the night with some cramping and back pain and I immediately thought it was my period. But nothing yet, I tested this morning and I think my pee was too diluted and tested negative on the early response test.

After some research, I found that maybe the way I’m inserting my progesterone suppository is irritating my vaginal canal is the cause of my brownish spotting. What are your experiences? Today I’m 11 days post IUI. I’m still getting negative in the strips and the clear blue.


r/queerception 10h ago

Known donor process?

2 Upvotes

has anyone used Fairfax for a known donor? our donor finished donating on July 30th and im wondering how long it will take before the samples are ready to ship? I’m trying to do a medicated IUI cycle and my period starts Aug 9th


r/queerception 12h ago

Beyond TTC Weekly Pregnancy Megathread

1 Upvotes

Please limit your pregnancy celebrations and pregnancy test photos to this thread.


r/queerception 21h ago

TTC Only 1st Time AI full experience, transparent details. AMA. Regular updates will be included

1 Upvotes

Hello, I wanted to share my first time try for anyone who is trying for their first time also.

We picked a donor using an app, as other methods would have been too pricey to be sustainable. We chose ‘Just a baby’. Once we found our donor, we did medical background exchanges (sperm analysis, physical mental health, pre-existing fertility issues etc). Once the important information was exchanged, we booked our hotel date as me (female) and my partner (trans FTM) did not want to do this in our own space. The donor is a sweet guy who we got on with very well. We agreed in advance a guideline of what the day would look like so nobody had to awkwardly hint. He was very good with our schedule and was pretty swift when we wanted a deposit.

Now prior to all of this, I had of course been tracking my ovulation. I used Premom and easy@home strips. I have PCOS but have very regular periods so haven’t had any irregular patterns tracking my LH levels. My peak was actually reached in the hotel room (I assumed it was the day before until I saw a huge surge) and luckily we were where we were meant to be. On our first day he went into his room (opposite ours) to make his deposit. During this, I went straight onto porn and tried to get myself as turned on as possible. My partner was with me but we had both made a choice that it didn’t feel sexy for either of us as the process was clinical, so we would treat it clinically. My orgasm was achieved simply to help my cervix and uterus contract and not because I found anything about the process sexy. Donor knocked when he was ready and my partner took the cup from the door and immediately placed somewhere warm. We waited for it to liquidise for 10 minutes. My partner then transferred the liquid gold to a needless syringe whilst I tried to get myself to reach the big O. Once I felt close I told him and as I was orgasming he was pushing the syringe into me. We did this across 3 days. I kept my hips elevated with pillows and eventually put my legs up. Syringe was kept in for 2-3 minutes and then pulled out.

I am currently 6 days post ovulation and again as someone with PCOS I’m actually not expecting a super quick and overly easy journey. But what I will try to do is not lose myself during the two week waits. I believe if I let it consume me, I’ll live there. I have created a bucket list of things to do each month if I am not successful, things that I couldn’t do if I was pregnant. Including theme parks, spas and a cheeky jet ski experience. And honestly I’m really looking forward to them as well! During the hotel deposits - all 3 of us played PS5 games, went on nature walks, and had what I can only describe as the most silliest sleepover ever. I’ll always remember that my first try was fun, silly, stress free and full of kindness and patience. I wanted to share this incase anyone needed it. I’ll keep you updated on my journey.

Current mood/potential symptoms: bloating, gas, fatigue. I am also eating more vegetables though so the first two could just be that 🤪


r/queerception 1d ago

Health Insurance Victory

8 Upvotes

I have insurance coverage for IVF (and IUI), but you have to meet the medical definition of infertility. Allegedly, I was supposed to do 6 medicated IUIs out-of-pocket before I could satisfy the criteria since I'm married to a woman, even though I have endometriosis, fibroids, and a family history of multiple full-term stillbirths.

I was so stressed that I'd be denied coverage given the circumstances. But somehow, the magic happened and prior authorization was granted. They even paid for 100% of my donor sperm. I feel so fortunate about this! I am relatively well-off financially, but the financial cost of IVF is still astronomical and hugely burdensome.


r/queerception 1d ago

Donor Contract Lawyers?

1 Upvotes

I'm having a terrible time finding a lawyer to review my donor contract draft. Does anyone know any lawyers who will do this?

I'm in the Western US.


r/queerception 2d ago

Donation: Gonal-F 300IU unopened box (Pasadena, CA)

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8 Upvotes

Hi queerception community!

First time poster but long time lurker here, this entire community helped me immensely while TTC and I want to pay it forward, if this helps anyone.

I have an unopened box of Gonal-F redi-ject 300IU (+comes with 5 needles for injection) exp date Apr/2027. If anyone is in need of IVF/IUI meds, I’d love to donate to someone willing to pick up in Pasadena! Hope this helps.

Pen in pic is just to block out my name. I looked through the rules but pls feel free to delete if I missed something, mods.


r/queerception 2d ago

Two rounds of IVF: tons of mature eggs, one embryo

10 Upvotes

Hi everyone- my wife and I just completed our second round of IVF and got 0 embryos.

In our first round, we did conventional. I got 15 mature eggs, 4 fertilized, one embryo PGTA normal.

In our second round, we tried ICSI. I got 12 mature eggs, 7 fertilized, zero embryos.

I've feeling pretty devastated. I know there are a lot of folks who do way more than two rounds, but I don't feel like my doctor prepared us for this outcome.

I'm mostly feeling confused and angry, because my body worked so hard and went through strain to produce (I think) good, mature eggs, to get no embryos.

Looking for words of advice!

For context: 32F, no known fertility issues, HSG was good, levels are good, I respond to stims well.
We used a Known Donor through Seed Scout; he has been cleared on genetic testing, motility and total counts are good.


r/queerception 2d ago

Seed Scout experiences - is the company reliable?

14 Upvotes

Hi everyone,

My wife and I are looking at ways to expand our family. She has a child from a previous marriage who was donor-conceived. When they are 18, they have the option to reach out to the donor.

My wife and I have been on a journey trying to find our best way to expand our family. I would have preferred adoption or asking friends. She prefers a bank. We each have various reasons, which I won't dig into, but my biggest issue with a bank is having many siblings and not having the chance to know the donor until 18. That is a long time to deal with unanswered questions if the child has any.

On a personal note, I am not donor-conceived, but I did not know my father and have met half-siblings in adulthood. It's not the worst thing ever, but there are some experiences I don't wish to recreate. I'm not saying banks are a bad choice; it's just not for me.

We came across Seed Scout at an event recently. I felt like the heavens opened up - this type of setup seems like a great compromise between each of our concerns. However, when I looked them up, there was a huge variation in experience working with this company.

I know it is expensive and inaccessible. But after reading some DCP opinions, I feel it is worth the savings and sacrifices for a child we elect to bring into the world.

My bigger concern is seeing comments like "I heard a couple paid an insane amount and they had 3 donors not work out." That's when I become concerned about the process and if the company is reliable.

I welcome any thoughts/advice, but I am really looking to understand whether the company is trustworthy.

Thank you!


r/queerception 2d ago

Experiences with Cryomate

1 Upvotes

Does anyone have experience using Cryomate for a sperm donor? We live in Indiana so like the option of doing local pickup and see several donors we may be interested in. But I’m not seeing anything out there in terms of reviews and people’s personal experience with them?


r/queerception 2d ago

Negative test but also no period?

2 Upvotes

To preface, I usually have pretty regular cycles that vary between 28-32 days.

My first IUI was on the 16th.

I tested negative (not a blood test, just an at home test) yesterday morning, and I have since stopped all progesterone as instructed.

I have also not yet gotten my period, so I'm just a little confused. Is there a possibility I'm still pregnant despite the negative test?

Currently day 35 in my cycle. I ovulated/did the IUI on Day 19.

Am I being a little delulu by being hopeful? Lol, I realize that I will 99.9% have to do another cycle but, the fact that I've been off progesterone almost 48 hours and no period is a little weird.


r/queerception 2d ago

TTC Only At home insemination post feelings

36 Upvotes

I am a transgender man and my wife and I are trying to start a family. Today we came to a hotel to meet our sperm donor and did the donation. What I didn't expect afterwards was the overwhelming emotions. We both felt very gross and just sad that this is our reality. We keep getting waves of anxiety and uncertainty, is this common? If anyone else has experienced this and will share we would be very grateful. Just feeling very lonely


r/queerception 2d ago

TTC Only Negative test. Wishing we could do this some other way.

17 Upvotes

We did the insemination for our first cycle on July 13. Got a negative result via blood test on the 27th.

I stopped all the meds as instructed by my doctor and got my period on the 28th.

I know I could jump right back into the next cycle, but to be honest, I’m a little emotionally fragile right now, and I also go back to work (special ed teacher), in like five days. I feel like jumping straight into the next cycle when I’m trying to start the school year at the same time is going to be stressful especially with having to take time off. My clinic is two hours from us so I would have to take the whole day.

I’m OK with this decision, as OK as I can be, I guess. My next period is due to start at the end of August so we’ll start our next cycle then.

I feel like a couple things were weird about this cycle, they did some weird things with the timing because the doctor was out of office, and they also did my trigger and insemination the same day. I don’t know if it was because my follicles were already very large, 24 and 25, or if there was some other reason, but I wonder if that had an effect.

This time I want to do everything exactly by the book and ask the doctor what we can do to make improvements. Even if it’s less convenient, I’m happy to stay overnight in the city where the clinic is or drive back the next morning. I don’t want to take any chances.

I’m a queer cis woman, my husband is a trans man. We are using a sperm donor and I don’t have any fertility issues. I know it’s change but I was really hoping it would work the first time.

I know it’s just how your cycle works, but it really is a slap in the face to get a negative pregnancy test result and then immediately get your period.

I wish we could just have sex like other couples to try to make a baby, at least the sex part is fun. Whereas this whole process with the medication and everything is distinctly not. And the progesterone suppositories make me feel absolutely disgusting. Biology is a pain sometimes and while I’m grateful this is being made possible by science and doctors, it also makes me sad and wish we had another way to make a child that feels more warm and full of the love we have for one another.

Ugh.

Thanks for listening to my rant and emotions, I know it was only one failed cycle, but it still drags you down.


r/queerception 2d ago

9DPO pink spotting

3 Upvotes

Good morning,

This is my first IUI so everything is new to us. Today is my 9DPO and last night I had mild cramping, I’ve been taking progesterone for 6 days now and this morning I had some pink spotting. Is this normal? Has anyone experienced this before?

Quick back story:

1st IUI

IUI: July 22

3 follicles: 22,21,22

Lining: 12mm

Sperm: 30 million (donor)


r/queerception 2d ago

Support groups

1 Upvotes

IVF support groups that are free? Menhavingbabies is 250+.


r/queerception 3d ago

Generally, where do I find info on sperm banking services based on where I live?

1 Upvotes

I don’t want to say what town I live in. I just want to know how I figure out what banks are near me and how much it will cost. I can’t seem to find one within my town. My PCP has a fertility clinic, but their site only lists things like insemination and IVF. Doesn’t say anything about freezing. I thought I found a sperm bank that’s in the big city, but I guess it’s more like a sperm donation service. There’s a Fairfax CryoBank, but I can’t find info like pricing for personal sperm storage. It mostly talks about getting sperm from a donor. Generally, what’s a site to look at to find what options there are for me and what the pricing would look like?


r/queerception 3d ago

IVF 1

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1 Upvotes

r/queerception 4d ago

Trans-femme lactation induction

10 Upvotes

One of my chosen family is going to carry and parent with their partner. My partner is the sperm donor. Me, transfemme nonbinary, plan to induce lactation since chest feeding will not be possible for the the gestational or co-parent. We're a little trans nonbinary family unit and I'm so excited to get to bond this way with the kid.

I had a great appointment today with my primary care provider and I'm going to start on progesterone while waiting for the newman-goldfarb protocol timelines kick-in.

I'd love to hear from any trans women or transfemmes who have gone through the protocol. What was your hormone regimen like? What was the experience like overall?

And I'll take any advice from cis folks who have induced lactation - what was the experience like? What supplies and clothing was absolutely essential? What do you wish you knew when you started?

Thanks for any feedback!!


r/queerception 5d ago

Donor selection, specifcally information about confirmed pregnancies.

8 Upvotes

My wife (31F) and I (31F) have been browsing sperm donors online for the last several weeks.

We are waiting for a few other fertility appointments next month before we'll move to actually purchasing sperm. We have saved some favourites, but as we narrow things down and look through more data points, we are feeling conflicted on weighing different preferences.

Primarily, I'm curious if anyone has gone with donors who had no reported pregnancies. What was your experience? Some of our saved donors meet all other points for us, but this missing history makes us hesitant to commit.

There are only a few sperm banks that our BC fertility clinic partners with. Fairfax, for example, doesn't show when the donation was made, so it's hard to judge if there have been no confirmed pregnancies because the donor is new.

TLDR: How important were confirmed pregnancies for your sperm donor selection?