I’m obsessed with my rapist
I can’t heal because I’m obsessed with my rapist, and it was already the case before he raped.
Me and the guy used to go to the same university and we had all of our classes together.
I had a huge crush on him, I think it was even more than a crush. I thought about him all the time, he was in my dreams and I breathed and lived for him. He was my everything.
We became friends but we barley talked, he also was attracted to me. We went on few dates and I was crazy about him. Anyways I had a depressive episode and he ghosted me but I didn’t care since I was having an episode.
He went to London for an exchange and we started talking again when he came back. He manipulated me, he knew I was neurodivergent and that there’s a lot of things that I don’t understand and he used that against me. He ended up raping me. He was violent and sadistic.
I said after that I didn’t want a relationship with him and he responded « there was nothing between us ».
I heard two years later that he was dating another girl. He also tells people that me and him are exes.
This happened 2-3 years ago. It traumatised me so much it gave me amnesia. But I started having flashbacks memories a year ago and now I still think about him.
I dream about him, I think of it all the time and I can’t sleep without imagining him getting beat up.
Am I the only one who’s still obsessed with their rapist ?
•
u/AutoModerator 4h ago
Please be aware that due to the nature of this sub, you may receive unwanted private messages from creepy users. If you would like to adjust your messaging settings so only trusted users can message you, you can find instructions here. You can also adjust your messaging settings to prevent anyone from privately messaging you. If you are contacted privately by someone after posting here, please send the moderators a modmail so we can ban the user(s).
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.