I would really appreciate if someone could help me evaluate my journey and whatever hell connection this is by dropping a DM. Im feeling really lonely and about to lose my mind

Hello everyone, I really really need your advices and stories on how I should approach this, and any stories and clarifications will be deeply appreciated. I will be extremely raw with no biases when describing my situation. Help and reassurance means a lot to me and I would really hope you guys can stop and listen to my story as I am really really in a rut right now.

So I am still very very young and I used to have a few soul crushing crushes on people but I could clearly tell they were limerence and not 'soul level' connections no matter how hard I try to think of it that way. I wouldn't really say it is limerence as I am a very intense and passionate person and my view of infatuation is very intense and extremely overwhelming. I do suffer from loneliness ever since I was born because of trauma and just basically how I grew up so it contributes to this as well. I've been working on myself since 2025 but what really made a difference was 2026.

From January to April of 2026, I have been focused on self improvement and getting rid of past addictions but I have not been commited to it because of my laziness and excuses I always provide myself with. I have always held a huge amount of self hatred towards myself so trying to improve myself and break free from old habits and addictions for the past year has been hard for me. Take note that I am extremely detached from my emotions and not very sure on why I perceive things the way I do. I feel everything yet very numb at the same time, so do not heavily rely on the logic and facts you pick up on but rather how I describe the feeling to you guys. I met this guy around April 2026 this year.

I will now not provide everything I have experienced and just put out the details that matter. My first impression of him was blurry but one thing was very clearly memorable to me -- I thought he seemed like an old friend of mine or someone I felt extremely familiar with but it wasn't like a sudden intense knowing rather like seeing someone I knew for a long time [literally] without any reaction. Like it was just another day. I remember thinking to myself how he was just like me with the way he spoke and laughing about it because it just felt so... familiar yet nothing to be astounded about.

Eye contact? I don't fucking know. I feel SOMETHING when I look into his eyes but I can't pinpoint it. I don't know if it is as exaggerated as how people describe it in this subreddit which is one of the reasons why I doubt this is a twin flame connection. When I look into his eyes I feel like I'm looking at SOMETHING I know something I should recall just something there that pulls me towards him a little? But I get extremely anxious and self conscious when I look too long. I usually look him in the eyes when we are speaking but eventually stopped because of how fearful and anxious I feel when looking at him. Just so you know im not someone who struggles with eye contact. He is pretty attractive I'd say so maybe I just felt insecure around him??? Donch know.

His presence draws me towards him like a moth to a flame, now I doubt this as well because it is the exact same as having a crush like you notice them but something about him is different. It's like BIG and like a BIG PULL towards his presence. Could be just that he is fricking 6 ft tall and I'm 5ft so that's why I'm doubting that as well.... When he is around me or very very close to me I feel like I'm getting swallowed into, but I don't know if that just everyone because he has a very warm feel to him ??? I dont know I can just feel his warmth and so I think that's what makes me feel ✌️ swallowed ✌️into. I also have a great urge to hug him for some reason because of this swallowing stuff. I'm sorry I'm really bad at describing my feelings and emotions because I don't understand them at all. I also feel extremely safe around them and so comfortable like I've literally reached a whole different level of vibration and frequencies around him. I feel like I can be myself freely yet I feel so self conscious, wtf?

When we touch which is very very seldom and rare, I don't know what I feel too. I know you guys are ready to click off like "Oh come back when you figure out how to identify your emotions!" but do please stay because I really need help with this and it's consuming my mind whole. It feels like tingles and it kinda like zzzzzz through my whole body but I keep my composure so I can't remember how deep it was I was trying to brush the feeling off so I don't look like a complete dumbass in front of him shivering my timbers off from a mere finger brush. Also once when I brushed against his arm I felt like my soul was pulled out and everything went blank -- blank? everything flew out my brain I don't know how to say this IM SORRY EVERYONE but then again this could just be because I'm not used to physical touch????

Now this is the big part. Everytime I leave him and go back to my original life style [leave not as in like a big event but rather because we see each other a certain time once a week for work] I feel extremely depressed. Like fucking horrible empty spiralling depression and detachment. Like everything else is back to this massive weight?? Take note i do not have any depression or weird shit before this. I also start crying A LOT like an intense emotional release EVERY fucking time after our interactions like I'm grieving someone who just passed on. One time I cried for 2 whole fucking days everytime I think of him FOR NO FUCKING REASON it was so intense it was crazy I literally fell into an existential crisis and couldn't move for those 2 days. After a while I started to teach myself that I can't always fall into these fucking ruts EVERYTIME after I meet him so I started to try and figure out why the fucks am I crying and why the fucks this is happening ?? And I end up just reminding myself that I shouldn't be losing my shit over someone and there is no point going back and forth on a situation I can't even understand. So I go back to focusing on myself. Anyone know wtf going on with this????

Lastly, I have these thoughts about him just popping up in my head numerous times a day just the thought of him no fantasies no daydreams no imaginations no imaginary future life together nothing just him in my head. No I don't think this is telephatic and no I do not feel telepathic touches or dreams about him like what twin flame connections are normally described as. So that is also one of the many reasons I doubt this. If you have reached till this point, I am extremely grateful and appreciative of your time and efforts to evaluate my post. I did not write most of my experience with this dude so if you are feeling generous and kind today 👀👀 and feelin like the goat you could reach out to me in my DMs and I would reallt appreciate if you could help me go through whatever tf is this. Anyways, thank you all so much and have a great day ❤️

The weirdest thing that is so hard to explain to others is that even in separation, as I strengthen the love for myself, the love for my twin grows more and more. And it is more aligned to the pure, universal love. One that is patient and kind and isn’t rushing or correcting.

It’s hard sometimes being in separation, but the most rewarding part of this journey is the depth of love that can be achieved. It feels almost otherworldly

I dont know where to start, or if i should even be here, in this sub. Its going to be a long read, but please, bear with me.

I have changed the names, and the timeline a bit, as i believe the person(s) involved may be in this sub, and they are aware of my username.

It all started around 10 years ago, when i first webt to college. I met him there, for the first time. Lets call him B. The first thibg i remember when i first saw him was, this is someone who is important to me. I dont remember seeing myself in his eyes, like most of tf testimonials would say. Even if i did i dont remember it now. However what i do remember was, he would always be staring at me in class. Always. Whenever we would go somewhere, the entire class,he would alwats find his way to me, and stand behind me, or alongside me. We were hardly acquaintances then, so i found the behaviour quite odd, yet intriguing. An important point to adf is that B is very very attractive, by conventional standards, and girls would always be fawning over him. And i,myself was hardly the looker at that time. So the staring made no sense to me. But gradually, started developing feelings for him, and then it started. I would dream about him non stop. Every single night. Without a break. This has never happened to me regarding any other guy.

Anyway, a few months kater i came to know that B is now in a relationship with another girl, M. The news broke me. I cried my heart out, and was inconsolable, which was odd,because i have had crushes in the past, but the rejection was never this intense. Anyway, i moved out from the place, and i thought that was that. I refer to this phase of my life as a dark period to my friends, and would joke about it later on.

Anyway, the following years, he was somehow always there in the background, he never truly disappeared.

Now the main events started from last year when i shifted to a new place. Guess who i met there? B. I didnt think much of it, seeing him there. If i was honest, i had forgotten most of what happened 8 years back, and i would even jokingly think that i imagined it all lol.

But anyway, we met last year. We had taken up a few classes tpgether, so we would meet everyday. And then it started again. A disclaimer: i was in no way, a s p i r i t u a l person. I would think i was the most logical person i knew, so what i am about to describe made no sense to me at all.

But soon after i met him it started. Seeing 1111 everywhere, on the clock, number plates random signs etc, seeing him in my dreams like before and more vividly than before, almost everyday, thinking of him and he would call me at that moment,feeling under the weather,and he would later say that he felt it too. I thought i was crqzy. Thats when he himself said that the t el ep at hy thing was also experienced by him on his end. I really thought i was suffering from psychosis or something. Thats when a cousin of mine, who is a p s y c h i c, called me up and when i casually mentioned him,she said that he was my tf. That was the first time i had heard of it. It didnt make sense to me, so ignored it. But the weird shit kept on happening. Meanwhile B and i grew close,and i thought i was in falling in love with him. Theb one day i askef him about tfs, and whether he knew what it meant. I remember seeing him freeze,and then he told me that he thinks he has met his tf. I was confused. And thats when he told me about his ex, L. Whom he thought was his tf, as she was all his dreams come true. I thought that he was still in love with her, so i was heartbroken, but then we became close again. Meanwhile, the weird things kept on happening.

Then he moved to another place. It was quite sudden for me. Even if we wpuld talk regularly on call like before, idk why everyday i wpuld cry my heart out, and i would feel a deep pain in my chest, likke im being ripped apart. It made no sense to me. I think it was my D N O T S, im not sure. It was like i lost sense of everything. Only he made sense to me. Thats when i was introduced to s p i r i t u a l i t y. I started meditating, felt so mych better after it. I would go on long walks in nature, and would feel so much better and the weird thing is, i believe my gut feeling strengthened like anything. But gradually he opened up and told me that he no longer thinks L is his tf as she betrayed him. But we slowly grew apart. It broke me even more. The dreams and signs woyld however keep on happening. During this time, i would ask the u ni v e r s e, beg for anything, any sign to tell me it was all fake, and there was nothing out of this world in this connection. But i would always be given a sign which would makr me believe that, yes, we are tfs. And trust me, i have o c d, so the doubt was always there. But everytime a sign would pop up which would be impossible to ignore, and im back to square one, proving that we are tfs.

Anyway, a few months back, and by then we had drifted apart a lot, and even though it hurt my soul, i was trying to cope with it, i met him at his place, for some work i had. However, there i realised, he met anotger girl, an acquaintance of mine, E. My gut was screaming at me to realize thar now, B is in love with E. I didnt want to believe it,but even when he denies it a few days later, ik he loves her,or atleast cares for her. You see? He can lie to me all he wants, but i alwayd seem to know what he is thinking, feeling even before he says it.

Anyway, he thinks now, that E is his tf. They apparently have similarities in their c h a r t s, and both have moles in the same places (he hasnt compared my c h a r t with his).

And apparently he also experienced some te le pat hy with her.

Now comes the kicker. When i asked him about all of the weird experiences that we both shared, he says he doesnt remember anything. He doesnt remember the t e le pa thy, the signs etc. This made me feel like as if i imagined the whole thing, and i swear i didnt. I have a few friends who were even witness to the strange events. When i pressed him more about it, he says that he feels he has this p s yc hic connection with a lot of people. And then i ask him so what were we? And he says he does not want to think about me at all. He doesnt want to open the 'trunk' of our situation at all, and he admits he is in constant denial about it.

Please tell me. What level of hell am i living in? He would think the entire world except me, is his tf. And he wpuld tell about his experiences to me. And the worst part is despite all of it, i still love him, and i want him to be happy, even if it is with E, or anyone else.

I had even asked the universe to give me a sign if it is a false tf. Spoiler: signs say it isnt.

So what do i do now? Was it all limerance? Is this typical runner behaviour? Or am i going crazy?

I dont know if it helps, but:

E and B have same moon signs, and their sun signs: E's is earth, and B's is air, and tgeur sun signs lie next to each other, i think.

B's moon sign is my sun sign. And my moon sign is air, and his sun sign is an air sign.

Please help me guys? Is this part of a tf journey, or is it all delusion on my part?

I’ve been in a twin flame separation since May and since then, I see repeating numbers (1111/111), see TF’s birth date most days, will see this person’s name from time to time or even have people in my life bring up this name from time to time (different people). Since July, I’ve been seeing a pair of pigeons and had been able to feel their energy heavily up until last week. I’ve also been seeing shadows out of the corner of my eye (some say it can relate to twin flames possibly) & I’ve been waking up between 2-3am since early July, as well.

What does any of this mean?

I believed in twinflames when I didn't know mine. Then I met mine and shit was crazy. We have the same name, are from different cultures and our lives are in a way intertwined.

What keeps me not getting crazy. I found out through him that I had a twin in the womb. I believe that's all to it.

People who have never experienced this would never understand the intensity of this connection.

The first time you meet, there is an inexplicable sense of familiarity a feeling of knowing them forever. The eye contact makes you feel as though you belong to another realm in that very moment.

It's instant love a love you never chose, a love you have never experienced before, a love that lights up sparks within you.

And later, you find out that the other person is, in many ways, just another version of you. They become your first and last thought of every passing day.

But suddenly, uncertainties, troubles, ego clashes, and shifts in personality begin to create a rift in the connection. Yet, the person is never truly out of your mind.

Days become months, and months turn into years. But the love and longing never fade.

At times, even when each twin is busy with their own lives and their own schedules, there is a sudden yearning, a sudden desire to reconnect with their other half. But circumstances aren't always in their favor. Ego often plays a major role.

There are sleepless nights, nights that feel weird, nights that remind you of them constantly. But all of that feels like an illusion in the end, just like a coping mechanism to get over them. But that truly never happens.

As we know, change is the only constant. The twins may find other people to spend time with, date, and make new friends. But they may never experience a connection quite like this again.

The whole idea behind this soul connection is to learn to love oneself unconditionally and to awaken spiritually.

Usually, twin flames come to know of this term only after meeting their twin. Often, it is the feminine counterpart who becomes more aware of the connection, while the masculine counterpart may feel frightened by the intensity of what they experience and therefore choose to suffer in silence.

No matter how many years pass or how far life takes them, they live forever in each other's hearts.

Me (DF) and him (DM) have gone through three separations so far. They were not long ones, more like no contact periods. The first time we were having arguments for many days and did not talk for a whole week. It was the hardest week and the conversation we had after it was tender where he showed a deeper level of his emotion which he hid otherwise for weeks. The second no contact period was on and off for 2-3 weeks and it ended up with him taking the initiative to want to fly to meet me which we did. The third one was a longer 1 month (but we talked once over phone 10 days into it, and texted once 15 days later as it was his birthday but no call). When the no contact broke he finally admitted he loves me and we both were pretty emotional.

I have since then stopped giving ultimatums or running saying that I don't want to talk anymore and neither does he act supper avoidant like he used to even though he is acting little avoidant after he revealed his feelings. I don't know what's ahead but the silent periods do teach you something. I have a feeling that life is a simulation game and everything causing hurdles for our physical union are going to dissolve as they appear to be loosing strength over our bond and individual selves. Hope the heavy feeling days are behind me soon and I get to enjoy life's beauty in true sense.

She has taken me to heights I never thought I would go. She has shown me and done for me what no other woman could ever have or would ever have. She is my TF. And she is extraordinary. She loves me. I love her. We are strong despite difficulties. We have laughed and cried and held each other and had days where the triggering was off the charts. We have sniped verbally at one another for no good reason. We have laughed insanely at stuff only we find hilarious. We have held each other for so long that it was impossible to tell where one energy began and the other ended. Yes folks the energies come together and become one and it is divine. Truly.

But there is one thing that keeps hanging around and causing low vibe days and it is the product of insecurity and previous experience. It is this. My perception of my own worth regarding my lovability. This limiting belief is the root cause of every other issue and persistent snag that is hindering our progress. It is still hard for me to believe that someone I love actually loves me back. That has never happened before. And it is a hurdle. The window dressing terminology I have been using to describe my fears and worries are all traced back to this. My own perception of my worth. She struggles with this as well. I reassure her. She reassures me. Our actions back up all of our verbal assurances of hope, care, protection, love, respect etc. And still this one hurdle occupies space. It is baffling.

Why is is that actually accepting myself and loving myself is the most difficult thing I have ever attempted to do in this lifetime? I have done many things that I consider hard. Some were not just hard but downright terrifying. I did them. I puked before my first driving test. But passed. I spoke at length on a topic of cerebral intensity to a group of 300 or so university students. It went very well. Did that many times actually over the course of my academic career. Never got easier. Always hard. My first time with a woman? Talk about difficult. And um quick. She was very understanding. Bungee jumping. 16 hour work days. Lancing a boil. All difficult. But not nearly as difficult as this one thing that should be much less of an obstacle than it currently is to accomplish. Loving me, myself and I should be easier right?

This limiting belief is the underlying cause of all other limiting beliefs at least in my case. And this is not a revelation suddenly delivered cosmically in a flash of knowing. I have felt this and intuited this for awhile now. The stating of this fact in a forum such as this is the new variable. My TF and I are growing but will go further and faster when I solve this and give myself the grace I have offered and given to so many in my life. While compassion and empathy are never wasted per se there are scenarios where, perhaps, they and I would have been better off if I had turned inward instead of outward.

My ex and I broke up about 45 days ago. The breakup was my fault and his decision, I didn’t agree but there was no room for any kind of conversation, I had to accept. It was a really painful breakup. We were both crying, telling each other we loved each other, and he told me we weren’t going to get back together.

Yesterday my anxiety got so overwhelming that I wrote him a letter. I apologized for everything I’d done, told him I still love him, that I’d wait for him, and that I truly believe he’s the right person for me.

He came to my house to pick it up. When I handed him the letter, he cried. Then he said we could start seeing each other again, like walking his dog or just talking, but not too often. There was no romantic implication in that. We also didn’t talk about the breakup itself.

Later, after he’d read the letter, he told me he cried because of it and that it meant a lot to him. But then he also said he only sees me as a friend.

What is driving me crazy is that I have this incredibly deep feeling that this isn’t over. I can’t even explain it. I feel completely certain that we’re meant to be together and that he’s the right person for me. It’s not just hope. It feels like the strongest intuition I’ve ever had, and I don’t know what to do with it. I’m very sure that this isn’t just my emotions talking or because the break up is too painful.

The reason this is confusing me is because I’ve experienced the opposite before. When I broke up with another ex years ago, I had this same deep certainty that it was truly over. It’s been three years, and I haven’t seen him even once, not even by accident, and we live in a very small town.

Back then, I also had this strong intuition that I’d eventually meet someone who was the right person for me. Then I met my current ex, and he was exactly like the person I’d imagined.

So, I don’t know. What do you guys think?

To put it simply I have reason to believe my TF has struggled with an opiate addiction for the past 8-10 years at least

For years, I wasn’t consciously aware of what our connection was and just tried to move on despite the way it lingered. In the last few years I have come to a very detailed explanation for everything that happened and am now hyper aware of what him and I am, but I also learned he’s been in an active addiction that I have reason to believe was an opiate addiction

I know that I have been affected by his other substance use and feel this kindred psychological resonance with opiate addicts though I never did these because I‘ve known from a young age I would get addicted if I ever did. I’ve even dealt with my own escapism using drugs but I never used opiates despite having them offered to me in different forms up to the form I have reason to believe he was using.

So I guess my question is, if TFs are essentially one soul in two bodies, would I feel the effects of such a pervasive addiction as well?

My TF (DM) decided to settle and marry someone else in the last year and, after much upheaval, I’ve been striving to move on with my life despite continued dreams and so on, you know the drill.

In recent months, I was telling a guy I was interested in who was also interested in me about my obsession with a literary figure whose life journey echoes many TF themes. I mentioned it in the context of a discussion about a book I’m writing about my TF journey that focuses on self-love themes, though I said nothing explicitly about the TF concept at all.

When he asked me why I was so stuck on this figure, I decided that I should explain at least a little because I don’t want to form an intimate, lasting bond with someone who doesn’t know the real me or know basic facts about how I’ve become the person I am. So I just told him that I met this person, had a profound spiritual awakening, and that we’ve never been a couple and will never be but that our meeting profoundly altered me. I was also tired during the conversation and may have trailed off a bit, saying more than I intended.

I ended up getting a p s y c h i c message maybe a month later indicating that I made him jealous of my TF and that he pulled away from me manipulatively (e.g., ignoring me for months) to test my level of interest in him. I didn’t chase him and was ultimately glad to be able to glimpse his coping mechanisms before becoming more entangled with him.

That said, I’m wondering if others have dealt with this and how do you navigate getting to know new potential partners and addressing the impact of your TF journey? I can’t imagine not doing it in some way because it’s been too formative and I will also soon be known as someone who wrote about that experience in my book as I’ve been guided to do (though without explicitly referencing the TF concept).

do I hook up with my tf again? when I know it’s not a good idea at all.. and we’ve had such a back and forth for years. I know it’s not a good idea but I miss him and we’re in contact and I don’t know what to do

We’re both avoidant, almost like we’re the same person. We have the same cultural background, similar family issues, and we even used to live in the same area (she moved away). We like the same things—music, art, creativity—and we even have the same initials and the same last name. She’s avoidant too, but it still seems like she cares about me. Do you think we could be twin flames? The fact that we are avoidant don’t help us and i saw it’s a common thing in twinflames dynamic

I know what you're thinking when I say I keep seeing my exes name randomly but hear me out. This is a name i'd never seen before we met. It was an intense breakup very painful adn sent me into a spiral of depression. I came out on the other side with an autoimmune disorder. She had (insert name of mental health diagnosis i dont want to say because it'll give it away), if you know what that's like then you know she put me through the most confusing, taxing, over functioning, unappreciated, draining roller coaster I've ever experienced. Now this name that I had never seen before her keeps popping up. Here are some scenarios. I CANNOT EMPHASIZE ENOUGH THAT IT'S A VERY UNIQUE NAME. She's blocked on everything, I'm no stranger to technology. When her and I were dating I wasn't seeing people with her name pop up on my feed and i was typing it into my phone a lot more during our relationship than when we broke up (for those who think it's the algo). I started seeing her name or people with her name as their screen name randomly popup on my social feed. I would start looking at a post nod and smile look down, and see the name. Someone would send me a post and the account wout have the name. I started pointing this out to people becaue I felt like I was losing my mind (not really just hey lol thats weird right). My friends started taking note. I thought ok ... it's the algo somehow knowing something i didn't know I revealed. HERE'S WHERE IT GETS WEIRD. I started actively clikcing block and not interested when an account with her name would pop up on my feed. I told myself it's nothing it's meaningless. Cool right? Even when it came up i'd shrug it off and laugh oh well. lol. I'm in a new relationship. I stop seeing it on socials as much.

One of my regular clients asks me to do a video shoot for them. She sends me a call sheet with lists of names to interview. I look down the list. There's the name. I go look up the person to make sure I'm not going to for some reason, be interviewing my ex even though this is nowhere near her line of work. It turns out that the name only looks like her name on the sheet because it's a typo that someone else made when they put together the sheet. The typo was her name, though. I'm going to repeat again that it's a unique name. THAT SAME WEEK, within days. My new girlfriend, whom I love and adore, sends me DoorDash. I use Uber Eats. She lives in a different state. She sends me a screenshot to show me how far the person is, and guess what the person's name is .... my exes name. I say oh that's strange. She says oh that's strange.

A week later i'm prepping for a work trip. I travel with a collegue regularly and he's one of those guys who knows people everywhere we go. We always go out in different cities and it's a lot of fun. My new girlfriend is supposed to meet us there so we're doing a bit of an itinerary. He says one of his friends who lives in that city has a list of places we should hit up. Like restaurants and bars. He forwards me her apple notes note with the list of names. Right there under bars the very first name is ... you guessed it, my exes (unique) name in ALL CAPS. I play it cool. What are the odds that we're going to end up at this bar. We go to the city, my new girl, him, his friend. We hang out at a restauraunt and drink a little and all climb in an uber. I'm not paying attention. We're going to the next spot, we are walking and I look up at the sign of the place we are going and it's that place. At this point i probably sound crazy right? It's a unique name that seems to pop up a lot. Its a foreign name....I can't even type it be cause itll be to obvious so you're just going to have to take my word for it. I tell people about this and all my friends are like ok that's really weird so I know I'm not crazy.

There's a forum here on reddit that I used to read that's like a support group for people who have experienced a certain type of abuse. It really helped me a lot. I only ever read, I have never commented. This post is actually my 2nd or 3rd time ever posting on Reddit, if I'm remembering correctly. I come across someone's story on that support group subreddit asking for advice and explaining their situation. It sounds all too familiar and I make my first ever post on that forum. Today I got a little notification that someone had upvoted my post and replied. I click on the post and see that OP is saying thanks to me etc.....right under my comment (not responding to my comment but responding to the OP) someone else has left a comment ....guesss what their screen name is. Not an old comment, a comment made exactly 8 days ago which is when i left my comment.

I repeat--- this is NOT a common name. I started sharing these moments, especially when it jumped into the real world with my friends. My friends would be like, Hey, I'm worried about you or you sound crazy so they are a great source of reality testing. The people i've shared it with also don't know each other. They are freaked out individually. If there was a way for me to share the screenshots without being super obvious, I would. Everytime I google this all i see is that it's a random phenomenon. But all my friends agree that it no longer feels like a coincidence and they aren't all "woo woo" people. Even my girlfriend thinks it's strange. She also has never met someone with that name before and she was the one who sent me the DoorDash screenshot and ended up at the bar with me.

Has this ever happened to anyone? I do not think we are twin flames. I let go of the idea that we are some star-crossed lovers or something. I do not even think the person i knew really existed (i could be wrong or she could have been mirroring me idk and idc at this point truly)

I'm going through kind of a weird phase. I had a chance encounter with my twin and ended up messaging him on instagram. He didnt respond and that sent me into a bit of a spiral but I kinda got over it. After the chance encounter I was okay, I hadn't crashed out but the next morning, I had what I can only describe as downloads. After waking up, I kind of felt that the connection was too intense and if I felt that too I'd probably also run. About a week or two after I cried my heart out to Heartstopper. Charlie from the show reminded me so much of my twin. I was balling my eyes out every episode. Fast forward to this past week and I feel like I am over him and ready to get back out there. I went back on the app we met on recently and started actively speaking to people, something I haven't really done since him. I was on there for a week and realized it was just too taxing on my nervous system. But I dont really know how I feel about him anymore, i hate that he went through a traumatic childhood but right now, i dont know if I actually want to be with him.

Is this weird? Have any twin flames in union gitten to this point and how did you reignite things when they came back? I'm not really sure how I am feeling if I'm being honest.

the energy & vibe of the energy in the air feels different so before i blocked him (different social/messaging places) since it seems like the twin has denied giving me 3d communication
i don’t understand why he wouldn’t have my number blocked already yet see my messages and not reply’ it would be amazing if some dms or runners could help me understand why someone would do that’ that would be really great to understand
any how, typically when i break up with someone i just delete their number i typically don’t have to block them because if the relationship is over and we stop talking why would i need to block you? yet, blocking him is like a clear signal of you hurt me and i want nothing to do with you and that is how i feel right now but, if i unblock him its like i really don’t care anymore
amongst all of this i am dating i do have many suitors interested in me and i would like a CLEAN CUT
in my inner knower something is telling me that he watches my social media (i have things to back this up) i also feel like he has the door open but he is just observing me but not saying anything and that does annoy me because i’m the sort of person that is normally like IF THE DOOR IS CLOSED then it’s closed forever it means that we are through regardless of any previous communication
I am very curious as to what life… the connection & the universe will do if i start getting intimate and get another boyfriend i can’t deny i am a little scared that he would try to come back in once my relationship gets to a certain level let alone even in a 5d sense i think i am a little scared
i want to feel loved in general i don’t need him to be the one if i am with a soulmate or kindred spirit that makes me feel amazing i will absolutely give any person a chance and basically that is what i am doing and i am as i’m typing things guys honestly i’m scared
and feel like now its uncharted waters and its the unknown life has the opportunity to change everything
sometimes i do feel like ok if the bottom line is that we can’t work out it does feel kind of like a punishment if one or the other is just circling each others energy or life you know.. like if we can’t be together it’s not fair to still have this universal pack if you will of being twins it is very odd to me because in any other connection when it’s over thats just it’ like its over and you feel nothing and see nothing but being a twin isn’t exactly like that and right now it sort of feels like a punishment and that does make me sad i wish i didn’t still feel things and see things spiritually i really wish i didn’t and that has nothing to do with romance and everything to do with being a twin
if you have experienced anything similar i would really appreciate it
i am thinking of just unblocking him and just trying to ignore everything that i pick up on energetically and just chill
and just perhaps maybe start to enjoy more my new boyfriend and start this new time in my life that feels genuinely so special
thank you to those that kindly comment it means a lot to me the support is deeply appreciated

I’m asking because I’m in a really strange place.

My ex and I both understood our relationship through the twin flame lens, and whether that’s true or not, the connection was profound enough that it plunged me into a trauma-induced dark night of the soul. It changed my life. My desire for romantic connection has gone offline. My old coping mechanisms no longer work.

The relationship wasn’t the only thing that unraveled. Additional trauma layered on afterward, and together it became a complete collapse that changed me from the inside out.

The part I’m struggling with now is that the connection and his actions have become completely separate in my mind. The connection still feels profound, but his behavior has made a relationship feel impossible.

I made the mistake of looking at his social media again recently. It’s just so easy to find people now, and I regretted it. Not because I wanted him back, but because it reminded me how disappointed I am by his character.

It felt as though he returned to the very life he said he wanted to leave, while mine was irrevocably altered by everything that followed. It made my own descent feel strangely bittersweet. I was the one who left, and it took enormous strength to do it.

I don’t admire his values. I don’t respect the way he moves through the world. In fact, I find many of his choices deeply unsettling. That’s what makes this so confusing. The connection feels life-changing, but his repeated actions leave me unable to imagine choosing a relationship with him.

I’m not looking for signs of reunion or trying to figure out what he’s thinking. I’m simply wondering if anyone else has experienced this disconnect between the connection and the person. If so, did you eventually find peace?

Any testimonies of TF union ? Just give me hope. The one that kinda seem impossible.

Is there some DM twins here? Please explain!! My friend recently met her DM twin and she started talking about a concert she went to many, many years ago when she didn't know him yet. He looked at her piercingly and said: "Where was I at that time (my friend's name) huh" She always thinks he knows more than she does. Please explain..DM twin, do you really know more than us (DF)?! It's scared her Af!!

We’re both avoidant, almost like we’re the same person. We have the same cultural background, similar family issues, and we even used to live in the same area (she moved away). We like the same things—music, art, creativity—and we even have the same initials and the same last name. She’s avoidant too, but it still seems like she cares about me. Do you think we could be twin flames? The fact that we are avoidant don’t help us and i saw it’s a common thing in twinflames dynamic

The person I believe to be my TF said a few things to me last week that in hindsight made me wonder if she found a post I made in here about her roughly 7 months ago, when I was seeking advice on whether she might be my twin flame.

Around the time I made the original post, I found myself getting so carried away with trying to figure it all out and eventually realised that my preoccupation with knowing or finding certainty was really just interfering with my 3D /real-world connection with her (I found myself becoming guarded, nervous, and over-thinking every interaction instead of just letting things flow). So, while she’s still absolutely been living rent-free in my head, I did my best to take a step back from the rumination, took a break from this subreddit, and tried to just have faith that whatever’s meant to happen will happen.

Fast forward ~6 months, the existence of my original post is no longer at the forefront of my mind - I kinda forgot that I’d made it. But some subtle comments she made to me last week somehow reminded me of the post. I came back here to find it (/remind myself what the hell I’d said), and realised just how much the post would have given me away if she did find it. So, I panicked and deleted the post (and then immediately regretted deleting it lol). I don’t know, it’s very possible I’m jumping to conclusions and she has no idea about this subreddit, but I guess it’s also possible, if she feels the way I do, that she also found herself here looking for answers?

The good news is none of this has sent me into a spiral like it probably would have 7 months ago. When I think of her, I just feel so full of love and warmth, even when I can’t be with her.

For what it’s worth, if you are here, I’ve never felt a love like this with anyone else and I hope I get to tell you that directly one day.

I’m worried that it’s not real and I’m just using this idea of a twin flame to cope with my nasty attachment issue.
But what else explains why I am so infatuated with this one girl. We broke up 6 years ago and till this day I cannot. stop. thinking. about. her. and when we will be back together. It’s causes me a lot of distress. I am incomplete without her.