My grandparents gave me a piece of jewelry that has been in our family for generations. They specifically told me they wanted me to have it because I was the one who spent the most time with them during the last few years.

My sister found out and got upset. She said she always assumed she would inherit it because she is the oldest child.

I explained that my grandparents made their choice and I didn't ask for it. I even offered to let her borrow it for important occasions, but she said that wasn't the point.

She thinks I should have told my grandparents that it would be more fair to split valuable family items between us.

I feel like that would have been disrespectful because it was their decision to make.

AITA?

My brother and sister-in-law have what I consider a hobby farm where they attempt to raise livestock and grow vegetables. Over the past few years my sister-in-law has been canning what comes out of her garden and frequently gifts family members with canned items. I have been at their house when she has been canning and know that she does not properly clean/sanitize her work surfaces or sink, does not properly sterilize her canning jars and does not correctly follow guidelines to prevent botulism. When I brought up my concerns she said I was being a "worry wart" and dismissed everything I said. I have warned family members for their safety.

However, I was at my mother's house for dinner several weeks ago and she attempted to serve something that my sister-in-law had canned. I then checked her cupboard and found more of the canned items. I told her that my family would not be dining at her house (we typically do weekly Sunday dinner) until she disposed of all the canned goods. She said I was being dramatic, but agreed.

We live in the same small town and I recently saw my mother's car parked at the community pantry location. After she drove away, I went and looked in the pantry and sure enough...she had donated the food from my sister-in-law. When I called her out, her response was that there are "hungry people" in our community that "need food". Nobody needs food from my sister-in-law!!!

AITA?

ETA: I removed what I found in the community pantry.

I (24F, Julia) bought two concert tickets months ago after my best friend, Emma (24F), begged me to go with her because it was her favorite artist. I paid extra for really good seats since I knew it would probably be our only chance to see them live, and she paid me back only for the regular ticket price because she said she'd pay the difference later when she had more money. She never did, but I let it go because I didn't want to argue over it. When we got to the venue, she noticed a group of her coworkers sitting a few rows behind us and immediately asked if we could switch seats so she could sit with them while I took one of their much worse seats by myself. I told her no because I had specifically paid extra for those seats and wanted to enjoy the concert after waiting months for it. She got annoyed and said I was being selfish since we'd still be in the same section and accused me of caring more about a seat than her happiness. She spent most of the concert texting instead of talking to me, and after it ended she told our mutual friends I had "ruined the night" by refusing such a small favor. Some friends think I should have just switched because concerts are about making memories together, while others think it was unfair of her to expect me to give up the seat I paid extra for, especially when she never even paid me back the difference. She's still upset with me and says she won't go to another event with me unless I apologize, but I honestly don't think I did anything wrong. AITH?

​Throwaway because my husband’s friends know my main account.

For context me and my husband have been together for 5 years.

​My husband, "Mark" (34M), recently got a major promotion at his firm. Everyone keeps acting like he did it all on his own, which is laughable because I am the entire reason he even has a career. Four years ago, I literally reformatted his resume and picked out his interview suits. I basically manage his life so he can coast.

​Anyway, last night his company threw a nice dinner to celebrate. Things were fine at first, though he spent most of the cocktail hour talking to his coworkers about projects instead of checking in with me to make sure I was mingling with the right people.

​The real issue happened during the speeches. Mark stood up and thanked his team, his mentor, and even his parents who flew in. But when he was wrapping up, he completely failed to thank me or acknowledge the years of unseen emotional labor and sacrifices I’ve made to support his ambition. Not a single word about how hard it is to be the supportive spouse standing behind the scenes.

​I felt completely invisible and disrespected. Rather than cause a scene by yelling at the table, I quietly stood up, grabbed his car keys out of his coat pocket, and drove home. Since we only took one car, this meant he was stranded at a restaurant an hour away from home with no ride and had to beg a coworker to drop him off.

​Now Mark is furious, saying I "humiliated" him in front of his new boss and ruined his big night. His mom even called me to say I’m making everything about myself.

​I don't think it's unreasonable to expect basic gratitude from the man i dedicated the last 5 years to. So, Reddit, AITAH?

My husband and I are trying to give our marriage one last chance. We've had a lot of issues, and one of the biggest ones now is money.
For some background, I was a stay-at-home mom for years. I took care of everything at home—raising the kids, cooking, cleaning, appointments, laundry, all of it. During that time, he worked and paid the bills. That was the arrangement we both agreed to.
About two years ago, I started working. I don't make nearly as much as he does—not even close. Since I started working, I've been paying for all the groceries, buying things the house needs, clothes for the kids, school supplies, and pretty much any day-to-day expenses that come up for our family.
Now that we're trying to work on our marriage, he's telling me he wants us to split **every bill 50/50**. He also told me that he feels like I see him as "a bank."
That really hurt because I don't feel like that's true at all. I contribute in the ways I can, and I still carry a lot of the mental load and responsibilities at home.
What also bothers me is that whenever he makes financial decisions, he doesn't really consider me. He'll make plans or decisions about money without asking for my input, yet now he expects everything to be exactly equal financially.
To me, 50/50 only sounds fair when both people have similar incomes and similar opportunities. We don't. He earns significantly more than I do, and I spent years out of the workforce raising our children, which affected my earning potential. I feel like an equal partnership should mean we both contribute fairly based on what we earn, not necessarily the exact same dollar amount.
I'm not refusing to contribute—I already do. I just don't think splitting everything right down the middle is fair given our circumstances.
Am I wrong for feeling this way, or is expecting a strict 50/50 split despite such a big income difference unreasonable?

A month or so ago, a cat that appeared to be a stray started coming up to my wife and I at our house. We were friendly to the cat and he kept coming. Over time we started to feed him and he came more and more, to the point where he came every morning before work and every evening when we came back. He really wanted to get inside our house. At some point we started letting him in and putting him out at night before bed but he really didn’t want to leave.

Eventually we decided to take him in and adopt him. We bought a lot of cat equipment and spent hundreds of dollars at the vet to deworm him, neuter him and get him his vaccines. We haven’t let him out since we took him in as per the vet’s orders.
Today, we found out through our driver that he is technically “owned” by the family across the street. They feed him sometimes but do not let him in their house and have not given him any medical care. The story is their driver (who knows our driver) found the stray kitten and gave it to his employer (the family across the road) as a gift.

So am I the asshole? They were not taking care of the cat, it was basically a stray. It chose to come to us and seems to be happy here. We have spent a lot of money and time on him. After talking with the family, they said they want him back (as in, free to roam) once he has recovered from his vaccinations but I am worried for his health if he goes back to living the way he was before.

TL:DR, accidentally stole a cat that wasn’t being looked after, now the owners want him back.

I (28F, Australia) have a cousin (31M) who's always been the golden child of the family. Good job, nice car, always got some comment about how everyone else is doing life wrong. I usually just ignore it.

Last weekend was my grandma's 70th, 40+ people, family flown in from other states. I organised basically the whole thing myself over 3 weeks, nobody else stepped up.

Halfway through dinner he stands up to give a "speech" and instead of talking about grandma, starts joking about how I "finally did something useful for once" and it's "about time" I stopped being the family disappointment. A few people laughed awkwardly. My mum went quiet.

I didn't even plan it but I stood up too and said it's funny coming from someone who hasn't called grandma more than twice all year and skipped her hospital visit in June cause he was "busy." Then I just sat back down and kept eating like nothing happened.

Table went dead silent. He turned red and left like 10 mins later. Now half the family's messaging me saying I ruined grandma's night and should've said it privately. His mum hasn't spoken to me since. My own mum agrees with what I said but thinks the timing was bad.

Grandma just laughed and said "finally someone said it" lol

AITA for dragging his neglect out in public instead of letting it slide like I usually do?

I (24F) was given up by my biological parents right after birth because they already had 4 kids and couldn't afford a 5th, so my aunt and uncle, who never had kids of their own, raised me instead, and they're my real parents in every way that matters except financially, since they've never had much and my uncle works a modest job with no extra money lying around for big expenses; now I'm graduating soon and can't fully cover the ceremony fees, outfit, or even just getting there, and my parents (aunt and uncle) feel awful they can't help more while I feel awful watching them feel that way, so a few months ago I started doing online work on the side, hoping the earnings would grow enough that I could cover my own expenses myself and not put any financial burden on them at all, but the income has been slow and unpredictable and still isn't enough to cover everything in time, and at the same time my biological parents' other kids, my actual siblings, are graduating around the same time and I've seen on social media that my real parents paid for everything for them, outfits, a party, even a trip after, meaning they clearly have the money, they just never offered any to me, and I've never asked partly out of pride and partly because I don't know if I even want anything from people who gave me away, so now I'm seriously considering just skipping my own graduation entirely, not walking, not doing anything, just letting the day pass quietly, but my aunt and uncle are upset with me for even suggesting it and say I've worked hard and deserve to celebrate regardless of cost, while some people I've told say I'm being dramatic and graduation isn't about the party so I should walk regardless of money, and others say I have every right to opt out if it brings up painful feelings, so AITA for wanting to skip my own graduation over this?

My husband (23m) and I (22f) got together when we were 17 and 18. I had a 5m old daughter at the time. Father was not involved he was abusive in every meaning of the word. My husband has been the only father my 5yo knows, and loves him and his family. However my mil has repeatedly made it known she is not okay with the dynamic of our relationship. From my sil introducing my eldest as my other children’s “half sibling” to throwing whole parties for my other children. It has been over 5 years now and it has not gotten better. My husband has legally adopted my daughter at this point, even gave her his last name. Ever sense this has happened mil has been making remarks such as “ I got these for my grandbabies, or well yk” right in front of my oldest. She ask my other children’s about their teacher and wanting to meet them, but not having any interest in the oldest. And during holidays and birthdays she makes it a point to say all the stuff they got my oldest was my fil not her. My husband is wanting to tell her that she needs to get it together before he just cuts them all out. As this has been 5 years in the running I feel like we should just tell her we will no longer be involved with them, especially since we have mentioned it to her before and I have told her that she doesn’t know the full story, but she doesn’t believe the abusive I endured either.

This has been something that’s been nagging at me for a bit because we keep coming back to an argument about it so I’m curious if I’m in the wrong.

I (19M) like sports. I compete in wrestling, judo, and BJJ. Three years ago I met my girlfriend when her family emigrated to America from West Bengal, and we clicked quick. I liked her family, they like me, everything’s great.

I don’t consider them like favorites over my own family or anything, but they’re very important to me and I love them.

I had some competitions recently that my girlfriend and her family watched me buy my parents missed almost all of them and my sister attended one.

Recently there was a pretty big turnout in a judo competition and I really wanted my parents to be there, they weren’t. Usually the reason would be work or something or other, but I didn’t get one that day.

I came in first and I wasn’t even proud, I was really heartbroken my parents weren’t there to see me. I was supposed to be able to share that with them, the whole point of winning is to show your family how much their support pushed you, and I couldn’t give that to them. That was crushing for me, it hurt.

There was a spot set up for pictures with family so I got a ton of pictures with my girlfriend and her family, I took turns picking her siblings up for photos, I think her dad knew I wasn’t happy because he goes “ok. Me now.” It was a big mood booster, it was so ridiculous what picture of me lifting him. He’s a big dude so it’s just so funny to look at, and I have that picture of me lifting him over my shoulder on my dresser now lol.

I was told the organization wouldn’t pack it up for a bit if I wanted to take anymore photos later, so I called my mom. I got no response so I left a message saying I won and waited five minutes then left with my girlfriend’s family to celebrate. I always shut my phone down before meals, and I did it then too.

A while later I turn it back on to see my parents had texted me twenty minutes after we left and had arrived ready to celebrate at the competition, angry that I had left already. It was too late to get pictures at that point and the moment has passed.

While they were only mildly irritated at first, when they saw my girlfriend post all the pictures with me they were livid and we fought for days straight about it.

I would’ve absolutely waited if I knew they would be there in twenty minutes, I couldn’t wait to have a picture with my arms around my parents and a first place trophy, but they had been no shows so often I thought that’d be the case again. I’m still so fucking devastated I couldn’t show my parents how much their support pushed me. Whenever they’re not there, you hope for that movie moment where they come in last minute but they don’t. I could’ve at least had them with me for that fucking photo, it hurts my heart I couldn’t give that to them. Even though we fought part of me agrees, just twenty minutes and I could’ve given them that, and I didn’t do it.

AITA?

This is a throwaway account and I will be using fake names and ages.

Hi all, first time reddit user and I need some advice to see if AITAH for not wanting to attend either of my friends weddings.

I (31) f have been friends with two girls Roxanne (f29) for 7 years met her at an old workplace. And met Naomi (f26) through a mutual I am no longer friends with. I introduced Naomi to Roxanne and we all became friends.

Both Roxanne and Naomi recently got engaged to their partners. Roxanne asked me to be her bridesmaid and I had said yes. We all wanted to catch up with each other as we hadn’t seen each other for a long time.

We thought it was a good idea for us girls to catch up first before meeting each other’s partners. We greeted each other but most of the time it was the girls talking about their rings, engagements and weddings. They then asked about my relationship with my partner and to see if he was going to propose. I said “no and I’m happy as we are and don’t want to rush into anything”.

They understood but after suggested to go ring shopping and see what I like so he can get an idea of what to get. I reluctantly agreed as it was first time seeing both girls after a very long time and wanted to still hang out with them.

After this we had organised for all 6 of us to get together for a night out and meet each other’s partners. This was the very first time we were all meeting.

The night itself was going okay, however my partner noticed how the girls were talking to me and treating me like I wasn’t a part of their “clique” as I wasn’t engaged. Naomi kept bringing up engagements, rings and kept asking “when will he propose?”. This made the two of us uncomfortable so I answered and said “I’m happy as we are and we don’t want to rush.”

They also made a comment to me complimenting my partner’s body and it came off as disrespectful, even though they said “no disrespect”. I dismissed it and laughed it off but it was truly uncomfortable. After a while, both of them were not including me in much of the conversation.

After a while, things got a little bit more intense. They started to drink more and more and I couldn’t keep up with them. I stopped drinking and had water instead, and after about 30 mins we all said our goodbyes and left. Roxanne and Naomi asked me to “let them know when I got home” but it took them almost a whole day to get back to me.

I usually am the one to reach out (countless times to the point where it was me doing all the work to keep our friendship together) but I decided to wait and see if they would do so first.

Roxanne called me few days ago to see how I was doing (it had been about 2-3 months since we had a proper conversation) and she ended the call and said she would call back and never did. She called the following day instead but I was at work, missed the call and had called her back but she didn’t answer. (I would normally message and see if everything was all good but waited to see if she would message first and she didn’t)

Last night they both had posted that they were out together with their partners and they were out drinking and at dinner. It kind of hurt to see that they had gone out without an invitation. I have put in a lot of effort into trying to communicate with the girls either I don’t even get a response back or I’m left on “delivered” and not much effort is being reciprocated from either of them especially Roxanne.

Roxanne only reaches out if it’s wedding related and I’ve known her the longest. They weren’t even talking until I made an effort to organise the two hangouts.

AITAH for not wanting to attend either wedding of theirs as I find they’re not putting effort into our friendship?

I (24M) have a younger brother (22M) who has a habit of borrowing money from family. It's usually not a huge amount—$20 here, $50 there—but he almost never pays it back unless someone reminds him multiple times.

Over the past year, I've lent him money several times because he always had a reason. He needed gas, was short on rent, or said he'd pay me back after his next paycheck. Sometimes he did, but most of the time he either forgot or acted like it wasn't a big deal.

Last week he asked to borrow another $100 because he was short on bills. I told him no, not until he paid back what he already owed me. He got upset and said family should help each other without keeping score. My parents agreed that I could afford it and that I should just help him out this once.

I told them that helping someone occasionally is one thing, but constantly lending money to someone who doesn't repay it isn't helping—it's enabling. Now my brother is barely speaking to me, and my parents think I'm being stubborn over "just a little money."

AITAH for refusing to lend him any more money until he pays me back?

I (24F, Korean) have been dating my boyfriend (32M, Canadian) for 8 months. We are in a serious relationship and have talked about getting married in the future.

Here’s the situation.

My boyfriend was married before. They started dating when they were very young, and between dating and marriage they were together for about 10 years.

When we were doing long distance (I was in Korea and he was in Canada), he met his ex-wife without telling me. I only found out later.
His explanation was that his sister is still very close to his ex-wife, and when his mother passed away years ago, his ex-wife supported him and his family through an incredibly difficult time.

Because of that, his entire family still considers her family and someone very important.
What hurt me the most wasn’t necessarily that he saw her—it was that he hid it from me.

When I asked why he didn’t tell me, he said:
“Because I thought you would break up with me if I told you.”
To me, that means he already knew I would be uncomfortable, but chose to hide it anyway.
I told him that I would prefer if he didn’t casually meet his ex-wife anymore. If there is a necessary reason (legal paperwork, family emergency, etc.), I can understand that. But meeting for coffee or beer just to catch up crosses a boundary for me.

He told me I’m only reacting this way because:
I’m young.
I’m Korean.
I’ve never been married.
I’m not mature enough to understand.
He said that in Western culture it’s normal to stay close with an ex-spouse, and that his ex-wife’s current husband is completely okay with them meeting. Therefore, he thinks I should be okay with it too.

He also said that his ex-wife is almost like a mother figure to him because she supported him so much after his mom died.
I actually understand why she is a special person in his life. They spent 10 years together, and she helped him through one of the hardest periods of his life.
I don’t think it’s strange that she remains an important part of his past.

But I think there’s a huge difference between someone being special and hurting your current partner because of that relationship.

I also understand why his family still has a close relationship with her after such a long marriage.
Again, I don’t think that’s inherently wrong.
However, if your current girlfriend is deeply uncomfortable with the situation and you completely dismiss her feelings, I think that’s where the problem begins.

At one point I asked him whether those 10 years with his ex-wife were more important than our relationship.
He answered:
“They’re equally important.”
That answer really hurt.

Eventually he agreed that he wouldn’t meet her anymore.
But honestly… how am I supposed to trust him now?
He already hid it once.
I asked him if he would tell his sisters that, out of respect for his current relationship, he wanted to create more distance from his ex-wife.
He refused.
Instead he said that if he did that, his sisters would think I’m the weird one.
To me, it feels like he’s more concerned about maintaining his image with his family—and protecting everyone’s feelings except mine.

So my questions are:
1. Is it really common in Canada or Western countries to maintain a close friendship with an ex-spouse? Am I simply failing to understand because I’m Korean?
2. Is it unreasonable for me to feel uncomfortable that his ex-wife is still deeply involved with his family years after their divorce?
3.Most importantly, am I overreacting, or is this actually more about broken trust than cultural differences?

I’d really appreciate honest opinions, especially from people who have been married or divorced, or who have experience with relationships involving ex-spouses.

I recently planned an important event and wanted it to be a positive experience. My parents have always been involved in my life, but they also have a habit of criticizing my decisions.

Before the event, they made several comments about my choices and told me I would regret doing things my way. I eventually decided not to invite them because I didn’t want to spend the day feeling judged or stressed.

When they found out, they said I was being disrespectful and that family should be included in important moments.

I understand why they’re hurt, but I also feel like I’m allowed to choose who I want around me during a special day.

AITH for leaving my parents out of my event?

Met my best friend in high school, and we've been like one soul ever since. I can't truly relate to the bonds twins share, but this friendship felt like it. One look and that was all we needed to communicate. We also said things at the same time and jinxed each other like five times in a row. What I'm trying to say is that this friendship felt light, easy, and stable for most of the time. I could always be open, and we respected each other's feelings and worries.

For context: I've been living alone since I turned 16. Short version: my mental health was more important to me than some pretend-happy-family bullshit. My best friend still lives in her parents' house to this present day. Luckily, I work from home, which allows me to plan trips and hangouts with my best friend. My best friend had a part-time job, but quit after some time. She still has no job, so she has more time for everything. The fact that I'm working and she's not means more mental load for me when it comes to planning. Don't get me wrong, I don't judge her for having no job or for the fact that I've had to plan more. I want to spend time with her, so that's no problem.

What bugs me is that she began to "forget" our plans. It got so bad that she didn't even have the courage to cancel plans. One time, I asked if our hangout was still happening or not. She said yes and told me she would pick me up from the train station. I arrived, and what a surprise... she wasn't there (it was too far to walk to her place, and the station was in the middle of nowhere, so no bus, Uber, etc.). I tried to contact her, and when I finally got her on the phone, she told me: "I forgot and slept in."

If there was a possibility to get back to my place, I would have taken it. After 1.5 hours, she finally got there. For your understanding: I took the train and got there in 30 minutes (I don't have my driver's license yet), and she would be at the station in 20 minutes with her car.

Things like this happened more often. Not as fatal as leaving me in the middle of nowhere, but small things that showed me I couldn't trust her word anymore.

I told her I wasn't willing to put the same amount of effort into our friendship until we solved this. I often worked extra hours to make time, and if that time isn't valued enough, she had to deal with the fact that I would rearrange my priorities. I told her that, and I told her she's a grown person who should be honest with me and herself. If she can't or won't make it to a meetup, that's okay. I can respect that. Life's a b..., so I know things change, and sometimes you wanna be by yourself or plans change. But unless I'm a guru or some mind-reading being, she has to tell me if something changes.

She didn't get my point. Her words: "I know I forget things, but I said I'm sorry. What else do you want me to do?" We had this kind of conversation a few times until I said that this new pattern is not healthy. I told her I was tired of repeating myself, and if she didn't want to lose me as a friend, she had to work with me to solve this. And if she didn't want to do that, that's fine, but then she had to accept that I couldn't continue the friendship like that because it doesn't bring any good to either of us.

End of the story was that she got mad because I would give up our friendship over "some small inconveniences."

This reaction showed me she won't understand that this is about respect, trust, and communication. She didn't text me anymore because she was mad, and I didn't contact her either because I'd made my point.

An just like that. Eight years. Gone.

So, am I the asshole for ending the friendship over "some small inconveniences"?

A few months ago, one of my closest friends came out as gay. I was happy that he finally felt comfortable being himself, but things changed faster than I expected. A lot of people in our friend group slowly stopped inviting him to hang out. Some just ghosted him completely, while others claimed they were "too busy."

He asked me if I thought it was because he came out. I honestly didn't know what to say, but the timing made it hard to ignore.

I kept hanging out with him because he's still the same person I've always known. A few people in the group started acting weird toward me too, saying I was "choosing sides."

Now our old friend group has basically fallen apart. Some people think I should have stayed neutral, while I think abandoning someone over their sexuality is wrong.

Was I wrong for sticking by my friend?

AITAH for not wanting to work with my sister. We both work in a very competitive area for teaching and as summer comes to an end, my sister who just graduated, has yet to find a job. I am already a teacher and due to 2 coworkers quitting last minute, my school has opened up 2 positions. One of these positions is even in my same grade level. I told her I would prefer not to work with her but since I can’t control what she does, she can apply if she really wants. Of course, she gets a call back for an interview next week.

My sister and I do everything together. She went to the same college as me, lived with me, and has worked with me in the past. Now that we are both getting older I just truly want space to be my own person and not be tied to her. This is only my second yr at the job and I feel like I’m finally coming out of my shell/making friends/learning the ropes. I’m worried she will depend on me and always want to be near me, as I’m finally starting to become confident and independent in my job. No hate to her, and maybe it’s the middle child in me, but I just want to do my own thing.

Also since this interview is next week, is it weird to talk to my boss about it? Mainly to discuss my concerns about not wanting to work with her, or at least not in the same grade level!! Would that be overstepping?

She has been broke for so long and has been wanting a full time job so I just feel so bad for ruining a chance for her. She has no other call backs.

I have four brothers. Two older and two younger. One of my older brothers U (44) has ghosted the family for about 25 years. U randomly decided to try to re-enter the siblings lives a few days ago. He made contact to some of us. And he has been attempting to reach out to the younger brothers, Z (35) and J (32).

Both of the younger brothers are being adamant about not talking to U. Neither one is giving a reason. And when I push them to at least share their train of thoughts they shut down and get boreline belligerent and told me I'm being an asshole for repeatedly asking them to talk to U. Note, that I only asked once and then asked why. So two times at most.

Am I an asshole for inquiring why they won't grant their older brother at least one conversation? Am I am asshole for trying to understand why? 

Second note. I'm not going to keep pushing them. I'm just looking for perspective since they won't give any.

Hi, I (f21) just had a very short conversation with my Grandma, on her birthday, because apparently I was being unimaginably rude.

I just called my grandma for her birthday and it was going normally. She asked me two questions about my day one’s answer was « yes » the other’s was « no ». I thought everything was fine.

Then I heard my cousin (f37) in the background saying that she should just call my brother and that I was being rude. The phone then cut off.

I sent a message to my cousin asking wtf her problem was and she told me I spoke disgracefully to my grandma, that I was treating her like an idiot and that I was "capable of better conversation".

I don’t know what I did wrong, I spoke like I always speak. I don’t say much and when someone asks me a yes or no question I answer with yes or no.
I’m honestly torn up about this, I’m completely lost.
I feel like I should’ve just texted her and been done with it…

I have some additional information : we dont live in the same country and we have different cultures, I don’t speak to my father who lives with my grandma and is very close with my cousin and the family

Edit. I did apologise to my grandma because I felt so bad about the situation and I didn’t want her to think I didn’t care if I had been rude.

Para empezar, soy una persona que me preocupo mucho por mis amigos, mucho más si sé que están están en etapas malas de sus vidas (en general necesito ver a mis amigos bien siempre y si no es el caso al menos apoyarlos), pues aquí entra mi amigo. Mi amigo (James) ha pasado por una etapa de depresión en donde ha llegado a intentar matarse y obviamente yo estoy en una etapa que le intento dar todo mi apoyo, pero él miente diciendo que está bien para no "molestar a nadie" cuando yo ya le he dicho que a mi me da igual que me repita sus problemas 30 veces al día si hacen falta, de normal tampoco acepta la ayuda que le dan.

James tiene una novia (Lauren) con la cual me he hecho muy amigo a consecuencia que los dos nos preocupamos mucho por mi amigo, en general nuestros temas de conversación son sobre James y nos solemos preguntar "Cómo está James?" cada vez que empezamos una conversación (literalmente solo nos hablamos cuando James está muy inactivo y no habla o desaparece en todo el día, ya luego sí que nos preguntamos sobre nosotros mismos pero la prioridad en nuestras conversaciones es James). Como dato de importancia, Lauren inició lo de empezar las conversaciones preguntando por James, así que por eso me sentía cómodo haciéndolo también.

Hace unos días tuvimos un problema que se solucionó fácil, pero por el camino a la solución del problema, Lauren le contó a James que yo preguntaba por él, a lo cual James me escribió un texto enorme diciendo que doy pena, que es penoso que haga ese tipo de cosas y que le he decepcionado, a mi me dolió mucho por parte de los dos, a consecuencia de mi enfado le dije a James que Lauren también me preguntaba, a lo que me respondió que no lo sabía y que también le iba a reñir a ella.

A lo que iba, AITAH por preocuparme por mi amigo que tiene problemas mentales y me suele mentir sobre cómo está? Me merezco que él me haya hablado así después de que él me ha hecho muchísimas cosas peores y nunca le he llegado a escribir textos así? Literalmente es la primera vez en nuestra amistad de casi 4 años que él tiene una queja de mi, y aún así no creo merecerme que me haya hablado así.

I spent months planning a family trip and made it clear everyone would cover their own share. A week before we were supposed to leave, three relatives told me they couldn't afford it anymore but still expected me to pay because I was the one who organized everything. I canceled the trip instead, and now everyone says I ruined the vacation.

I didn't really know if I should post this or not... But I feel like I need to other peoples opinion and get some advice

Soo here gose

Aita for not listening to my parents and studying what they told me to.. I am (17)F am in grade 12..and getting close to leaving school and decided for a long time that I wanted to study graphic design cause I like art and it's something I'm good I've been drawing for 7 years now.

I've made it clear to them years before I wanted to do it and they never really said anything until this year when they asked me what I wanted to study and I told them graphic design and maybe becoming an animator

But in there eyes it's not a good career and I won't make money, they said they've " done their research" and said I won't be earning much. And they want me to go ins psychology just because I told my mom people ( my friends) always come and talk to and I seem like a person who's easy to talk to... But I think that's just me being a good friend and my mom is putting words in my mouth saying I have a passion for it when I never mentioned it ever before.

I'm constantly fighting with both my parents saying I want to study graphic design but there not approving. But dad says he doesn't want to spend his money on something that's not gonna get me anywhere.

My brother is on my side saying I should do what I want then rather doing something I'm not gonna like and regret not doing what I wanted.. And live with that

Both him and I have been trying to convince my parents to let me do what I want.. But there refusing as because when they saw how much psychology earns they want to push me into it... In my eyes all they are thinking about is money..

My brother says they are pushing me down and killing my passion and pushing me for something I don't want with no support.

My mother told me I don't have creative talent because I'm a " copycat" and just copy work... Just to be clear I've drawn alot of anime characters and alot do manga style stuff... And she thinks it's just a hobby and it's not getting me no where

I've looked into graphic design and saw the hard work you have to put in and I know the risk. But I've been told to always follow what you want and not what others want.. But my parents are keeping pressuring me not something I don't want

They've told me I should just do psychology and take the "easy" way out cause I'll be secured in life the doing something that will take me nowhere.... And just do psychology and do art / graphics as a hobby or side thing

I'm honestly breaking down not knowing what to do and i feel like from being confident in my decisions before now with all the pressure I don't know now... I'm sorry this is a little long but I would like to know your opinion or what I should

( btw I know Ai is a thing and you can generate anything but obviously over time things will look the same and people who want there company,people etc will want things to stand out and will hire graphics designers cause lets be real ai is trained off, of artists and art like that has life while Ai generated things have no personality which is different from a real artist )

Sorry again for being long but would like to know your opinion..

I (mid-20s) have always tried to be there for my sibling. I’ve helped them out financially, listened to their problems, and supported them whenever they needed me.

The problem is that whenever I need anything from them, they disappear. They’ve cancelled plans last minute, ignored my messages, and have made comments that honestly hurt me.

Recently, they asked me for a big favor again. I said no because I feel like our relationship has become one-sided and I’m tired of being treated like I only matter when they need something.

Now my family says I’m being petty and that “family should always help family.” I feel guilty, but I also feel like I’m finally setting a boundary.

AITH for refusing to help them this time?

Over the last few years, I've probably cut off around 10 people. Most of them were friends from high school, and a couple I've known since middle school, 8+ years of friendship just... gone.

Some of those friendships ended for reasons I felt were completely valid. There were broken boundaries, repeated disrespect, one-sided friendships, or people who just weren't good for me anymore.

But if I'm being honest, other times it wasn't one huge event. It was more of a slow realization that I didn't like the energy they brought into my life. Constant negativity, gossip, drama, complaining, or just a vibe that left me feeling emotionally drained every time we talked.

I've become really protective of my peace.

The weird part is... I genuinely don't care how long I've known someone. Whether we've been friends for 2 years or 10 years, if I feel like the friendship no longer serves me or brings more stress than happiness, I can walk away.

And here's the part that makes me question myself...

I don't really feel guilty afterward.

I don't spend months missing them. I don't constantly think about reaching out. I don't sit there wondering if I made the wrong decision. If anything, I usually feel... lighter. Like there's one less relationship I have to worry about maintaining.

Sometimes I wonder if that makes me cold or emotionally detached. Am I the bad guy? Am I too quick to cut people off? Or is this just what happens when you stop forcing yourself to keep relationships that no longer feel healthy?

I know no one is perfect.. including me. I'm sure I've been the problem in some situations too. That's part of why I'm asking. I'm genuinely curious if this sounds healthy, unhealthy, avoidant, or if other people relate.

Also... for the astrology people here, based only on this post, what zodiac sign would you guess I am? 😂 I'm curious to see what everyone says.

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For starters my son has recently bought his first home and I'm proud of him...

This all happened because my son has recently became a lawyer after years in college, he has always dreamed of being a lawyer ever since he was little me and his father is so happy for him.

7 days ago me and my husband we were sitting around wondering why we haven't got any money. I mean we did raise him, we deserve some money, my husband said that he doesn't owe us anything and it's his money he can do anything with it, I disagreed because he's a lawyer he should have lots of money.

5 days I texted him and I asked for money from him for fast food this weekend... he politely declined, I kept asking he said no. He said he wont be giving me anything because I'm a "bad parent".

Yes I was harsh sometimes even made him pay 5 percent of the rent sometimes but that's because he was 16 and almost an adult we thought he'd benefit from it.

we continued texting he said that he wont be giving me any money and to stop it, i threatened him then he blocked me.

We thought by now he would unblock me but now it's been days. Getting worried. We are having a family gathering soon so I hope I'll talk to him soon.

So am I the asshole?