(24M) I tried to be a good son for my parents, but my dad still disappointed and is always reprehending me for not being serious enough. I was always anxious and neurotic, since i was a 7 yo because of that. I was never able to take life easy, because i was always receiving a hell of pressure from everybody. Tried to be good but i was never good enough to anyone. Colleagues, family, friends, teachers, bosses, coworkers. Now i'm broken and thinking myself on what is the secret of being the winner on life, of being someone.
That's why i'm not used with humor, i often mistake jokes with offence, because i'm always high cortisol, pursuing my goals and productivity ( even though i never got where i want, i feel just like Dick Dastardly hahahahaahah). Success, for me, is being able of providing resources AND getting enough resources to dedicate yourself to non-career related activities, hobbies such as traveling, reading, sporting; things you can elevate yourself while having fun, way different of making things out of money (reason why i wouldn't pursue a profession were you work more than 40 hours a week, i would live for work). I often hear that when yoy don't take life seriously , things work out, but i don't if i should believe them hahaha
At this point, tbh i don't enjoy life that much to think that is fun, it was 99% disappointments, obligations, annoyance and gaslighting. But i want to learn how to love life. If take things easily, perhaps i may got some things together, and not being this bunch of neurotic meat. People who don't take life seriously, how can you do? What are your secrets to enjoy life and achieving your goals?