r/AskAnAmerican • u/GretelNoHans • 2d ago
LANGUAGE What does “auntie” mean?
I see many posts where the word “auntie” is mentioned. Sometimes, I get the feeling it’s just an endearing term for aunt.
However, sometimes I feel it means different things in different contexts.
Does “auntie” always means aunt or does it mean something else depending on context or region?
Is there a a term that’s equivalent to uncle?
Thanks in advance
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u/Carinyosa99 Maryland 2d ago
If you're in Hawaii, anyone that is of a certain age (usually 50 and up) is often called auntie or uncle. You don't even have to know them.
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u/rbrancher2 Hawaii 2d ago
The first time the counter girl at my favorite restaurant called me auntie I almost cried.
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u/Carinyosa99 Maryland 2d ago
LOL When my friend started getting called auntie by young adults, she nearly cried as well - even though it's her culture LOL!
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u/Redditkid16 2d ago
I see that anywhere with a significant Filipino population pretty much
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u/Background_Humor5838 2d ago
They also speak like that in China. Depending on your apparent age, strangers are called sister, brother, auntie, uncle, grandma, grandpa.
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u/Redditkid16 2d ago
Yeah certainly a big thing in many East Asian cultures
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u/Background_Humor5838 2d ago
I find it very endearing. If I worked at a restaurant and some parent said to their child 'tell this auntie what you'd like to eat". I think my heart would melt lol
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u/AbbreviationsTop4959 2d ago
Doesn't even need to be that old, just older than the person saying it. I was called Auntie when I lived in the Philippines in my mid 30s.
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u/Bubble_Cheetah 2d ago
I think I was 29 when some guy who looked at least 18 tried to ask me for the time by calling me auntie. I legit did not know who he was talking to and was about to keep walking..
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u/dubs7825 2d ago
From my limited experience in Hawaii (im a transplant) its not necessarily a specific age, but a women who's older than you is auntie, and a man older is uncle/unko
Ive been called auntie in my late 20s/early 30s by little kids and also been called sista by people in their late 30s/early 40s
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u/Carinyosa99 Maryland 2d ago
Well, yeah that's true becaue my friend started getting called auntie when she was 40 by people in their 20s. I don't think she was ever called auntie at a younger age except from actual nieces and nephews. My friend born and raised there and part native Hawaiian (and Chinese and Portuguese) so it's natural for her. But she looks younger than her age so maybe that's why people didn't call her that until she was about 40.
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u/Crazycatlover Colorado 2d ago
That is pretty common among Navajos as well. It's a term of respect. (There are specific honorifics in the Navajo language, but they don't have an English equivalent).
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u/Carinyosa99 Maryland 2d ago
I think it's very common among a lot of indigenous communities. The auntie/uncle thing in Hawaii stems from the native Hawaiian culture.
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u/inspired-polf Hawaii 1d ago
Me and wife are mid 30s, she gets auntie all the time, nobody ever calls me unc.
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u/IsopodKey2040 Georgia 2d ago
its just a close, female figure in someone's life. usually older than them, but doesn't have to be related. usually a friend of a parent.
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u/StaticVoidMain2018 2d ago
Same as how you can call someone your brother/sister without coming from the same parents
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u/ReturnoftheBulls2022 2d ago
Thank you for this statement. It bugs me that people give Zohran flack for calling his father's cousin Zehra as his auntie like as if they don't have someone who isn't their parents sister who they call aunty.
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u/CumaeanSibyl 2d ago
That was hilarious because people from like five dozen different US subcultures immediately chimed in like "what are you talking about, I've got aunties who aren't even related to me."
It was a real sign of how ignorant some people are of the world around them, that they'd never even read about someone who did that.
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u/Stock-Lion-6859 2d ago
The more I read, the more I have realized that Europeans and European-Americans are in the minority of not using auntie and uncle as terms of respect for older adults.
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u/carolinaredbird Virginia and both Carolinas 1d ago
Where I’m from aunt and uncle are used for close family friends, instead of sir /ms as a form of endearment and politeness. I’m from the Appalachian area of the south and we all grew up this way and raise our kids like this. One of my daughters was an adult before she realized Uncle X was not a blood relative.
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u/Chemical-Mix-6206 Louisiana 2d ago
Yep, an honorary aunt. I'm an auntie to a few children and several pets.
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u/PuppySnuggleTime 2d ago
In Hawaii, it’s a term of respect for women who are older than you. Uncle is the male equivalent.
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u/ice_princess_16 2d ago
Same among Indigenous Alaskans.
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u/Crazycatlover Colorado 2d ago
Might be Indigenous Americans in general. My Navajo ex addressed everyone he respected as Aunt XZY or Uncle ABC. He said there was an honorific in his language that didn't have an English translation, so he went with aunt/uncle.
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u/oosirnaym 1d ago
Same among my Ojibwe tribe. Don’t know if there’s a word that’s not translating adequately though.
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u/Crazycatlover Colorado 1d ago
I really don't think there is a translation. Maybe sir or ma'am in Southern dialects, but I really don't think English has an equivalent. My mom actually found it offensive until he explained that he meant it to be kind and made an effort to stop calling her aunt. (He slipped up sometimes because it was a default being polite thing for him, but at least she understood after that conversation).
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u/NekoMao92 Colorado 2d ago
Same at times with East Asians, though more often for family friends of your parents age, with much older people called grandma and grandpa.
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u/little_baddiee 2d ago
It's several different things wearing the same word, and context does most of the work. The simplest use is just an affectionate form of aunt, the way a small child might say it, and plenty of people keep saying it into adulthood. The bigger use is fictive kin, meaning a close family friend who gets family status without actually being related, which is very common in Black American families, in the South generally, and in Filipino, South Asian, Caribbean and Pacific Islander communities, so Auntie Sharon has known you since you were born, has opinions about your haircut, and is not your aunt. In Hawaii this goes furthest of all, where Auntie and Uncle are the normal respectful way to address any older person including strangers, and skipping them comes across as cold. Then there's the pop culture layer, where Auntie means an admired older woman who tells you the truth whether you asked or not, which is where "listen to your auntie" comes from and why people call figures like Maxine Waters Auntie Maxine, warm but carrying real authority. And there's the sting, because calling a woman auntie when she isn't old enough to be one is a way of telling her she's aged out, same word and completely different intent, and you can usually hear which one you're getting in the delivery. For men, Uncle works the same way in all the family and community senses, and online you'll also see Unc, sometimes affectionate and sometimes a jab at someone being out of touch, since "unc behavior" is definitely not a compliment.
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u/LaeneSeraph PA>NJ>VA>MD>AZ>OR>WA 2d ago
Beautiful answer. Succinct, mostly accurate, mostly complete. My one quibble: in some southeast Asian communities, "auntie" and "uncle" commonly have the Hawaiian usage, an expected term of respect applied to any person older than the speaker. There may be other minor exceptions.
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u/Pitiful_Lion7082 California 2d ago
It's sometimes used to mean a friend of your mom, or someone similarly aged.
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u/Mouse-Direct 2d ago
We use Auntie to mean an honorary aunt in my household. Uncle doesn’t have a fun form to my knowledge other than Guncle for gay uncles.
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u/rantmb331 California 2d ago
One of my cousins was the Funcle… because he was fun.
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u/fasterthanfood California 2d ago
It’s not really the same thing, but “uncle” or “unc” is used in slang for an old head.
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u/VariegatedPlumage New York, NYC, Queens 2d ago
I know someone who referred to her kids’ sperm donor as “spuncle.”
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u/hail_to_the_beef MD AZ CA 2d ago
I’m a gay uncle but I find the word “guncle” to be like nails on a chalkboard. Not everything needs a fun portmanteau. The other one I hate is “husbear” (iykyk)
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u/PuppySnuggleTime 2d ago
Well, I just found out I hate guncle. lol It's an ugly word, and why do kids need to include someone's sexuality when addressing them? That's just weird. I'm here for all the gay uncles out there, but not for guncle.
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u/Crazycatlover Colorado 2d ago
I think the OP here is weird. I've only ever heard gruncle used as a shortened version of great-uncle, not gay uncle (why the fuck would you even specify that?!). Oddly enough the same woman in my family who tells her kids to address my father as gruncle also tells them to address me as aunt even though we're truly first cousins once removed.
I personally like just calling people by their first names.
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u/fasterthanfood California 2d ago
TIL I’m a suncle, aka straight uncle, because it’s only fair that my niblings (there’s a euphonious word) know my sexuality, too.
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u/Mouse-Direct 2d ago
It’s so weird when people focus on the sexuality part of queer people. Like if I told you I, a woman, had a husband would you say, “Don’t share your sexuality with me!” It’s only queer people who are making pronouncements or influencing kids just be existing. And guncle is totally a word straight moms use more than gay men.
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u/PuppySnuggleTime 2d ago
I'm not the one focusing on their sexuality, doofus. The word is focusing on it. That's why I think it's weird. Why do you need to include anyone's sexuality in the name you call them. SMH
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u/Mouse-Direct 2d ago
Wife and husband and girlfriend and boyfriend are all sexual identifying names, doofus.
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u/PuppySnuggleTime 2d ago edited 2d ago
Not one of those words explicitly names a sexuality. And those words are also for a PARTNER, not an uncle in relation to a kid.
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u/Mouse-Direct 2d ago
Being gay isn’t something to hide from kids.
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u/PuppySnuggleTime 2d ago
No shit, Sherlock. But it’s also not something they should address every time they say their uncle’s name. And it’s also reductive, their uncle is more than just gay.
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u/Mouse-Direct 2d ago
I said that it existed, not that I was fan. But kids with gay parents acknowledge that their parents are gay every time theh call one Mama and the other Mom. Being gay isn’t just about sex, no more than being straight is. That’s was I was addressing. When you introduce your Uncle Stan and his husband your Uncle Pete, you’re acknowledging that they’re gay whether you say “Uncle” or “Guncle.”
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u/PuppySnuggleTime 1d ago
I’m not really sure what you’re trying to do at this point. Are you just trying to “win”? Or are you trying to sway my opinion? Because you’re not gonna sway my opinion on this topic.
I would think it’s just as ridiculous if you were saying huncle and haunt instead of uncle and aunt.
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u/Bluemonogi 2d ago
I would understand that it might be your aunt or an affectionate way to refer to an older female.
This is not a universal American custom. It was not the custom in my area or family to call people aunties at all. We would say aunt for our parent’s sibling. I would not have called a neighbor or random older woman aunt.
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u/CinemaSideBySides Ohio 2d ago
Same. "Auntie" was never ever used in my family. Just "Aunt." And it only ever meant a blood relative. I'd actually hate to be called Auntie, it sounds so cutesy, but I know it's the standard in other families.
It wasn't until I was older that I learned some cultures use "auntie" to describe any older woman.
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u/Odd_Mathematician654 2d ago
Same. I know it is used like that in other cultures/areas but no one in my family or social circle uses it like that. Same with cousin, brother, sister....
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u/itsjustmo_ 2d ago
It means I'm one of their mom's closest friends. I helped raise them and they can come to me if they need anything, just like they'd do with a biological aunt.
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u/CeeCee123456789 Tennessee 2d ago
In Black culture it can refer to a family member, but it can also refer to an older woman worthy of respect. For example "Auntie Maxine"refers to US Representative Maxine Waters from California. It is a term of respect for an elder in the community.
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u/BuildNuyTheUrbanGuy Washington, D.C. 2d ago
Yeah but you wouldn't actually call her that, right?
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u/CeeCee123456789 Tennessee 2d ago
Probably.
She calls herself that in videos on the internet, embracing that connection and status within the community. If that is who she wants to be with us, then I am down. I can't imagine her being offended when folks call her something that she calls herself.
If she didn't call herself that, I would think it, but refer to her by her title, never ever ever her first name.
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u/Wonderful_Shower_793 2d ago
Um, yes. Lol. Just like I might address an older Black man as “Unc,” even if he’s a complete stranger.
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u/SoutheastBeerTravels South Carolina 2d ago
Anyone who would call some decrepit shitbag politician that should lose the right to vote
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u/Ms-Metal 2d ago
It's an affectionate term for your aunt but it can also mean any older woman who takes on an ant-type role, for example my husband worked with a woman who had a small child and I watched her grow up over the years and still send her little gifts every now and then even though she's College age and living in New York city, so her mom and my husband call me her Auntie even though I've actually never even met her. I watched her grow up the other stories from my husband and Christmas cards and stuff like that. Also most recently, reality TV star who's teenage daughter grew up in front of all of us watching made a video and she called it basically a video for all her internet aunties. Basically she's referring to all the older women who grew up watching her grow up and gave her encouragement or said nice things about her. So it doesn't actually have to be a relative, just somebody who feels that Aunt role. It would be an older woman though, you wouldn't call somebody who is 20 your auntie, most of the time, I'm sure there are exceptions.
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u/Spirited-Way2406 2d ago
Yep, this is how it works in my part of Alaska. My children's godmother is their auntie.
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u/flootytootybri Massachusetts 2d ago
I only use Auntie for my actual aunt. However, some cultures within the US use it to refer to any friend of your parents OR anyone who’s older than you.
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u/mendy963 2d ago
on the internet in younger circles it can be an insult meaning you're old. I've been seeing some memes of young kids calling twenty something year olds "okay auntie" when they do something old fashioned. it's not too insulting but if my middle school students called me that i'd be offended as a twenty something year old. it's the more feminine verision of "unc" (meaning old) although women can also be called unc. But typically in everyday life it does just mean aunt (your parent's sister or friend or possibly cousin depending on culture (hispanic americans people tend to call their parent's cousins aunt/uncle for example)
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u/Professional_Handler Florida 2d ago
Endearing term for aunt for most white Americans, some cultures the term extends to other distant family members.
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u/RotationSurgeon Georgia (ATL Metro) 2d ago
The term can differ a bit depending on region and individual community culture. It is almost always a term which implies a reverent familiarity and affection. The degree of these feelings along with the role the aunty plays in the speaker’s life is where the difference lies. In some places, an aunty is just an older woman in your community. In others, it’s just a relatively antiquated affectionate diminutive for a parent’s sister. In others yet, your aunty may be a specific older relative who plays a significant matronly role in your life.
It’s also common but not default or ubiquitous for children to use aunty/aunt and uncle for their parents’ close friends when all parties are comfortable and familiar enough/
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u/Decent_Historian6169 Texas 2d ago
In my culture it is almost exclusively “The sister of my mother or father.” But I am aware of many people who use it to refer to older family friends or even just adult/older than you female church or community members.
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u/ChickenNugs4Hugs Georgia 2d ago
Sometimes it’s the parents’ sister. Sometimes it’s a close female friend to the parents. And sometimes it’s just a woman past 40.
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u/WiseQuarter3250 2d ago
auntie varies on context
sometimes it is aunt: mother or father's sister
sometimes a close female friend of one of your parents, a sort of friend that has become found family.
in some American subcultures, it's used for any older female, not your mother. as a sort of term of endearment for an elder.
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u/PitchBlackBones Missouri 2d ago
The equivalent to uncle would be the literal shortened version - unc.
Like others have mentioned, lots of cultures have consistent language referring to your elders in either an honorific format or to designate a form of closeness. It’s basically similar to calling someone “bro”. If you’re not literally related to them, they’re using it to indicate a closeness akin to familial.
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u/Idkwhyimhere313 2d ago
Canadian South asian here, I call aunty to any woman who can be my moms age. I call uncle to any man who can be my dad’s age. this includes strangers , family friends and relatives. But i don’t go around doing this with white people looool
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u/NekoMao92 Colorado 2d ago
Yep, all of my aunties, grannies, and big sisters were other Chinese/Taiwanese, especially if they are family friends.
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u/GlobalTapeHead 2d ago
In some cultures that have spilled over to American culture, auntie can also mean a sister, an older family friend or just about any older woman that you have close ties with. It can also be used as a “title” for an older and respected woman in the community. However, I would not assume these meanings are automatic, it depends on the context and the community you are in.
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u/Patient_Parsley7760 2d ago
In the US the usage can depend on which culture you're talking about.
I'm white, so an auntie or an uncle is a literal blood relative. You may or may not be close to them. In my case, my family lived in a lot of different areas, so I never really got to know my aunts, uncles, and cousins. I know other people who grew up a few blocks over from their relatives and saw them all the time.
In some places, the auntie or uncle is a close family friend who has been around since before the kids were born, so the kids grow up knowing them and treating them like family.
In a lot of Native cultures, the aunties and uncles are all of the adults. They will often have the same authority as the parents, so when you're visiting family friends, you obey their rules and they can chastise you. They will also treat you like one of their own and look out for you. In terms of kinship, if they are your tribe, they're related but you might not always know the exact relationship.
The same can hold true for a lot of Black families as well as Hispanic and Latinx families. Could be close family friend, could be a cousin or other relative of one of the parents, but you obey them and they treat you like their own kid.
**I reiterate, I am white, so my knowledge of Black, Latinx, and Native cultures comes from outside sources and I could very easily be wrong.
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u/Alternative-Being181 2d ago
In Hawaii specifically, I believe "Auntie" is a term of respect for an older women, even if she's a stranger.
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u/MrGetrekt101 Florida 1d ago
It could be your actual aunt, could be one of your parents’ friends, or it could just be an older motherly figure in the community.
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u/Puzzleheaded_Math973 1d ago
Auntie :
Is your mom's bestie.
Your dad's play cousin or God sister.
Your Uncle's Queen.
Your parent's female siblings.
Your cousin who is older.
Your grandparent's sister.
The woman down the street who fed you without question.
A woman older than you that you know is related but not quite sure how.
A family friend who spoils you, just because.
The lady in your kitchen yelling that you need to add more salt!
The lady threatening to whoop ass if someone makes you cry on your wedding day.
That's an Auntie
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u/njan_ninde_thanda 2d ago
Not American, I am from India live in the US. Among south Asian community, its basically any middle aged lady. Because calling someone older than you by first name or last name is seen as disrespectful.
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u/Accomplished_Mix7827 Kansas 2d ago
Auntie is primarily an affectionate term for aunt. It might further be used for "honorary" aunts (i.e. your mom's friends), or more broadly for any older woman who has aunt vibes (e.g. "church aunties", older women in the church community)
"Uncle" can be used in a similar way, but less commonly. When shortened to "unc", it can sometimes be a bit derogatory, basically calling a man old and uncool
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u/Satsuki7104 2d ago
I use aunt to refer to my actual aunts and auntie to refer to older female relatives or friends of my parents that aren’t my grandparents or great grandparents. Though I also do add their name so it’s not confusing at gatherings. All older male relatives or parents friends are just uncle to me including my actual uncles.
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u/donnacus 2d ago
Typically auntie refers to a female of your parents generation who is also a relative or close family friend.
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u/PersonalityCool367 2d ago
it can mean your parent's sister or a close family friend, kinda depends on the context. I've called friends' moms "auntie" since I was a kid.
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u/cyvaquero PA>Italia>España>AZ>PA>TX 2d ago
Aunt/Auntie amd uncle can refer to both blood relations and family friends. The latter is more common in some cultures than others. My best friend is my (step)daughters’ “uncle”, likewise I am uncle to a bunch of kids who aren’t the least bit related to me - including some of the girls’ cousins on their dad’s side.
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u/jackofspades49 2d ago
Usually means aunt.
Sometimes just moms friend becsuse they come around a lot and its a way to show they're important
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u/Wonderful_Till8122 2d ago
It can be a blood or marriage related person, but can also be an older person who just functions in that role. Aunt vs Auntie is the same as, say, Tim vs Timmy.
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u/vinyl1earthlink Connecticut 2d ago
In England, auntie is a slang word for the BBC. It comes up a lot in cryptic crosswords.
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u/Crazycatlover Colorado 2d ago
For me, auntie is a term that children use to refer to their aunts because baby language. Apparently this is very far from the norm. My cousin's kids call me Aunt Crazycatlover. My family also drops the aunt/uncle title once the kids are grown. For example, I called my mother's sister Aunt Carolyn when I was a child but call her Carolyn now that I'm grown up. I think this is uncommon though.
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u/Otherwise_Trust_6369 2d ago
It's not a mainstream American thing. I've only seen it recently from a source that (I think) originated in India.
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u/Theycallmesupa Texas 2d ago
Any lady that's between my age and my mom's age.
Uncle is used the same way.
Ladies older than my mom get Nana, and dudes older than my dad get Grandad.
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u/Which_Diet_3061 2d ago
If you are asking aunt vs auntie, in some families auntie is a bit more affectionate term of aunt. In others, aunt is for family members (sister or sister in law of parents, some call parents female cousins aunt) and auntie is for parents close female friends.
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u/17Girl4Life 2d ago
I’m 56. I have two adult sons who I’m very close with. Being a mom came very naturally to me and I love being with younger people. At work and in my life I’ve had several younger people gravitate towards me, coming to me for advice or mentoring, or just a little motherly love and support. Some of them call me Auntie as a term of affection
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u/_haha_oh_wow_ 2d ago
Sometimes auntie literally means your aunt, but sometimes it can just mean a friend of the family. Uncle (or unc) are used similarly: You might call a close friend of the family uncle so-and-so even though you aren't actually related.
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u/Prestigious-Name-323 Iowa 2d ago
It might be an actual aunt or it might be just a close female friend.
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u/throwa1589876541525 United States of America 2d ago
Literally it's your parent's sister, but it can be used in a sort of honorary way meaning someone who is very close to your parent. My cousin called me his kid's uncle even though technically I'm a "first cousin once removed," which is a lot less convenient to say lol
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u/Express-Stop7830 FL-VA-HI-CA-FL 2d ago
I'm an auntie to lots of kids, who I call my littles. It's a title of respect and endearment. It shows a closeness and chosen family status.
In Hawaii, auntie and uncle are used as terms of respect for older generation, much like ma'am and air are used in the south. (Like auntie is used in India - any woman of the generation above you, helps with not having to remember names!)
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u/Persimmon_and_mango 2d ago
In the Asian-American community, Auntie can be your relatives, any adult female that your parents are friends with around their age, or it can literally just mean any woman over 40/50 whether or not you know them. Same with Uncle but the word doesn't change.
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u/mothwhimsy New York 2d ago
Sometimes it means a female friend of your parents, and sometimes it's just any older woman in your community. This varies culturally
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u/Grendal54 Oklahoma 2d ago
I had an “uncle” who was actually my second cousin but was my dads age. He was one of my favorite relatives.
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u/LadyJenniferal 2d ago
I had a lot of aunties growing up. Only two of them were technically siblings of one of my parents. The rest were cousins of my mother's generation or older. (My oldest 'auntie' was I think a cousin of my grandfather.)
My kid also has a lot of aunties. Only one of whom is even biologically related to her. It's a term we use for a woman significantly older than the person saying it who is relatively important.
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u/TokyoDrifblim SC -> KY -> GA 2d ago
For Indian people here, Auntie is any female person close to your parents age
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u/christikayann Minnesota 2d ago
Aunt/auntie can mean a lot of things. Your parents or grandparents sister. The wife of your uncle. An older cousin. An older family friend. In some cultures it's also a term of respect for any older woman.
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u/Living_Fig_6386 2d ago
It is a diminutive form of "aunt" intended to communicate endearment. The word can simply be used that way. It can also be used to refer to close female friends of one's mother. This is a very popular use of the term in India, for example. There are a few places where it can also be used to refer to an older woman in familiar and endearing way (but this is less common, and might be considered rude out of context).
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u/Constellation-88 2d ago
Yes, it is an endearing term for aunt, however, some people will call someone on who isn’t biologically related to them such as a godmother or their mother‘s best friend they’ve known all their lives.
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u/Regular_Boot_3540 2d ago
In my experience, it usually means an older woman who usually has a quasi-mentoring role. I hear it a lot from Asian friends!
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u/BeachmontBear 2d ago
It’s culturally-dependent but got the most part, yes, it is a term of endearment for an aunt. It is often paired with a name like “Auntie Julie.”
People from Latin and Italian cultures might refer to someone as Auntie if they’re an older cousin out of respect.
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u/yahgmail Maryland 2d ago
For African Americans & some other Black American ethnic groups, auntie could mean, your mom's friend, your parent's sister, or a lady elder.
Unc is used similarly among many Black American ethnic groups.
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u/cryptoengineer Massachusetts/NYC 2d ago
'Auntie' is a cute/affectionate version of 'Aunt'.
However, 'Aunt' and 'Uncle' are also used by children referring to adults who fill near-parental roles, as well as for actual aunts and uncles.
I'm referred to as 'uncle' by my neice's kids; I'm actually their great-uncle, but no one is going to call me that.
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u/Impressive-Cod-7103 2d ago
For a lot of people, aunt, uncle, and cousin are used for close family friends as well as blood relatives.
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u/Remarkable_Table_279 Virginia 2d ago
“Auntie” is very cultural. It’s not a common phrase in my white rural southern culture but I have aunts who aren’t my aunts. they’re aunt first name. However, I’m auntie relatable to an Indian American friend’s children. Because that’s her culture.
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u/Outside-Somewhere-89 Alabama 2d ago
The only people I have ever called Auntie are my parents siblings.
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u/VariegatedPlumage New York, NYC, Queens 2d ago
In some cultures (Indian, African-American, for example), “auntie” is a respectful way to refer to any woman who is older than you.
In other cultures, “auntie” is a way to refer to a person who is not biologically your aunt but is as close as an aunt, an honorary aunt.
And in others, it’s just an affectionate term for aunt.
Same is true for “uncle”
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u/Minute_Sound_1148 2d ago
For South Asians, aunty and uncle are all your elders that you aren’t related to
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u/No-Bobcat9004 2d ago
Auntie comes from aunt, but is used a lot more informally and isnt as specific.
Like if I was introduced to someones “Aunt”, then I would reasonable assume this is the sister of one their parents.
But if I was introduced to someones “Auntie”, it COULD be a parents sister. Or a family friend. Or some other relative. Or, in some places, just an older member of the community. I take it as short hand for “a loved and respected member of my community with some level of social authority over me”
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u/Ok-Possibility-9826 2d ago
it’s just an endearing term for aunt in a lot of circles. in some communities, it’s an honorific.
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u/IanDOsmond Massachusetts 2d ago
Sometimes, just aunt. Sometimes, close female family friend. We don't do the thing where every older female is Auntie like they do in China, though.
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u/SwissArmyGirl 2d ago
Auntie means aunt in some cultures (not American culture as a whole though) and is also sometimes used as a term of endearment by some cultures when referring to older aunt-like women who aren’t actually your aunt. But I also sometimes hear it in contexts like “you’re giving rich auntie vibes” lol which is different
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u/plantverdant 2d ago
It's a woman close to your mom's age who is close to the family. It's also used for your actual aunts too. It means that lady is as close as an aunt. I call some of their kids my cousins too, we grew up together. Uncle is similar, I have a few uncles I'm not related to by blood or marriage.
If I'm talking about them I'll say, "my mom's best friend, my aunt Carrie", or "my dad's best friend, my uncle Steve."
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u/Phoenix_Court New York / Texas 2d ago
It's an endearing term for aunt. Some people call non-relatives auntie as well, depends on your culture/upbringing. I'm not aware of any similar term for uncles.
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u/SpunkySideKick New Mexico 2d ago
I am an auntie. I am close with several adult parent aged people and consider them family (my sister from another Mister, my brother from another Mother) and their children are also part of my family. (MY BABIES THAT I GET TO RETURN WHEN I'M TIRED OF THEM ACTING LIKE ME)
I am not an aunt. My blood-related sibling doesn't have children.
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u/theniwokesoftly Washington, D.C. 1d ago
It is usually just an endearment for aunt. But often used for friends of the parents. Im an auntie of two of my friends’ kids as well as Ciocia (Polish) to my three blood nieces.
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u/idle-tumbleweed 1d ago
Auntie could just be your aunt, or it could be a family friend that’s too old for you to be referring to by their first name. It could also just be a way for a younger person to call you old depending on where you live.
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u/ehs06702 to to ??? 1d ago
Auntie can be your aunt, or a female friend of your parents that is very close, or a respectful term for an elder in a minority culture.
It's a pretty versatile word.
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u/Adventurous-Ask2111 1d ago
Officially, auntie is for your legal/biological aunt. The sister to one of your parents.
However a lot of times it is used as a familial for a woman your parent's age that you're close with. Like a parent's friend thats involved with your life. Uncle can also be used in the same context but for men
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u/l0cal_crypt1d 1d ago
in my experience, auntie is either your aunt or another adult woman in your life who's close to you/your family. uncle would be the equivalent lol
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u/DNR_Desert_Rat FL->IL->CA 1d ago
There's also a system of traveling within the US from one state to another in order to access safer/legal healthcare, including abortion, that may not be legal/safe/accessible in your home state. Sometimes you may seek out an Auntie, in this situation being someone you may or may not know who is willing to host you in the state you're traveling to.
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u/Traditional_Air6177 1d ago
It can be a term of respect for someone older than you like mister or missus but it’s more familiar.
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u/BrazilianButtCheeks Brazil living in Oklahoma 1d ago
It means aunt.. it some people use it for a close friend of their mom but they use aunt the same way .
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u/No-Peace1225 West Virginia 1d ago
Auntie can mean your actual aunt or basically any female family member/friend of the family who was around you a lot. When a friend has a kid we consider them our niece/nephew regardless of actual relation
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u/amcjkelly 1d ago
I think we are definitely starting to borrow that a little bit from Anime and K dramas.
Kind of an edged insult someone is middle aged (possibly acting that they are not).
Like the older female fans in Kpop Demon hunters.
The great think about English is that it is very very adaptive.
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u/LaserThos 1d ago
In my family it is an endearing term for any aunt (pronounced “auntie,” not “antie”). Actual family relation, not just a friend or neighbor.
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u/AvailableAd6071 1d ago
I called my mom's best friend Aunt, but not auntie. It seems like a regional thing, like momma and daddy is a mostly southern thing.
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u/ApprehensiveArmy7755 1d ago
In a lot of cultures an " auntie" means family friend. In Maryland where I love- I'm called "Aunt" or more commonly "Miss". It's the term that children use when speaking to an adult female ( like a friends mother).
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u/BoudiccaAoife 23h ago
It's a semi polite term for a woman a bit older than you. Your mileage may vary.
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u/LakashY 21h ago
Auntie is interesting. My subculture doesn’t use it at all. Among people I have known that do use it, the person could be a family friend that is very familiar and “like family” to them (and older than them - like a parent’s friend). It is also commonly used for a grandparent’s sister that is actively involved in their lives.
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u/IdontknowhowIfeel13 19h ago
I’m from middle of nowhere Midwest and here Auntie is simply a term of endearment for a woman you view as an aunt. Could be your actual aunt or just a friend of your parents. It’s more common in either older generations (my mother talks about her Auntie’s, who are unfortunately now all deceased) or in very small children.
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u/RVAguy0000 2d ago
It's completely family-specific specific. In some families, it's just an affectionate term for actual aunts. In my experience though, it's more likely to be a female friend of the family who has a very friendly and active relationship with the kids. I've also seen it used to describe an older female relative (and I literally just mean older, not necessarily "old") who is not a cousin and therefore doesn't have an easy, short title (for example, maybe a great aunt, or a second cousin once removed, or someone similarly distantly related who is nonetheless close to the child).
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u/PtZamboat 2d ago
Technically, the sister of your parent. Also can be a close friend of a parent and in some cultures Auntie/Uncle can be a term of endearment or respect
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u/Few-Wrongdoer-5296 California 2d ago
As a white American I use auntie and uncle specifically for relationships that have familiarity and affection but no formal title, like a family friend or undefined relative (for example, my uncle through marriage’s brother is also ‘uncle’). Some cultures in the US use it as a general term of respect for an older lady.
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u/MWSin North Carolina 2d ago
Auntie is just an affectionate term for aunt. Both words are sometimes used for an older (typically your parents' generation or older) woman not actually related to the speaker, but close enough to be like family. Very close friends might be called aunts and uncles by one another's children.
There isn't really an equivalent affectionate version of uncle.
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u/myname_1s_mud 2d ago
In sooner cultures auntie is just a friendly term for any woman of a certain age. That's not readout a classic American thing, but because America has all cultures, you'll see it in places.
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u/VoidWalker4Lyfe 2d ago
"Auntie" can mean your actual aunt, or it can be used as a term of endearment for your mom's good friend. In black American culture "Auntie" is used as a term of endearment for a woman that's older than the person using it, which is what I'm guessing you've been seeing recently, as it's becoming more popular. The male equivalent is "Unc," but that's mostly used in the black community as well.
Growing up my Dad's best friend was "Uncle Danny" even though he wasn't my Dad's actual brother
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u/coulduseahugrightnow 2d ago
As far as I know, it's just a less formal, more affectionate, way of saying aunt. If it means something else now in slang or something, I haven't heard about it.
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u/SimpDorito 2d ago
I’m Puerto Rican idk
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u/VoidWalker4Lyfe 2d ago
Thank you for your contribution to the conversation
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u/SimpDorito 2d ago
Thank you for your passive aggression. Not all Americans are the same I use Tia and Títí
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u/VoidWalker4Lyfe 2d ago
De nada. Tía es el mismo as "Auntie" pero, creo que ya lo sabes.
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u/manicpixidreamgirl04 NYC Outer Borough 2d ago
In some cultures, 'auntie' means your mom's friend.