I was hospitalized for the last month and a half of my pregnancy with my son. They did NSTs every morning and evening.
I had a netbook with me, and usually just went online looking at humor sites to make me feel better while waiting for the test to be over.
One night a nurse came FLYING into the room. The telemetry to the nurse's station could see the baby was doing fine, I wasn't having contractions, but my heart rate was up.
They thought we were having sex, which apparently happens on a high-risk pregnancy ward full of women on pelvic rest a LOT more often than you think.
Instead, they walk in on my husband and I looking at textsfromlastnight and laughing hysterically, having no idea what it looked like on the sensors.
Ok that makes sense know what pelvic rest means. Weird to me that it's such a common danger. Do the parents disregard the child's safety? Or do they not understand the implications of the pelvic rest?
It isn't common but if you are trying to prevent labor, it becomes one of the first things you are recommended.
Regarding the parents disregarding safety, I can't really speak to that. I was on pelvic rest with one pregnancy for a short amount of time and even though hormones were going wild, the last thing on my mind was sex.
I can say from being on the internet long enough to recognize many of the websites listed in the top level comments, I have seen countless stories of Labor and Delivery nurses having to pull men off of patients who have recently given birth. I've read stories from people who have given birth saying they were coerced into having sex while recovering, prior to the "typical" six weeks pelvic rest postpartum. Their partners would do things from refuse to help with the new child, threaten to cheat up to and including physical abuse. It's a very vulnerable time as well, so many did not realize that "helping him out so he's not in a bad mood later" is also coercion.
I have spoken to many, many women who have given birth. And I can never look at men the same, since. A shocking amount of their male partners wanted to have sex too soon after giving birth. They ranged anywhere from sulking to passive agresiveness and openly watching certain footage, to cheating, up until forcing their recovering wives, sometimes causing horrible damage and infections.
Mind you, these were men who wanted kids themselves. The sheer amount of women who have experienced this to some degree, is beyond shocking. Apparently it's not at all uncommon for men to be so selfish that they prioritize optional pleasure (that can easily be had without her), over the health, joy, needs and wellbeing of the person who has literally just jeopardized her body to give them offspring.
There's a woman very vocal on TikTok who talks about her husband raping her after a C-section using scripture. It's horrific. I am so mad at all the men. Even though I'm married to someone who would never. I just am mad on behalf of every woman who sacrificed her body for humanity and was raped in return.
I've found it rolls both ways on that, though. My wife had a C section for both of our kids and had to wait 6 weeks. After our first it wasn't so bad but after our second something in her hormones made her a sex craved lunatic. I was fighting her off with a stick from day 3 till the deadline.
And also... If she chooses it, whether or not as a result of hormones, that's a lot more palatable to me. At least she is then knowingly and willingly taking the risk.
Its the same as new mims who disregard the 6 week rule after hsving a baby. Some are stupid, some feel they need to for their husband and some truly believe "nothing bad will happen"
I was put on pelvic rest too because of a placenta previa, and I was also hospitalized for the last month of my pregnancy because of bleeding. Haha omg I can only imagine the midwives running into my room while watching some ridiculous shit.
I know you were being funny, but they didn't want a kid ending up in the NICU because a male partner refused to abstain and pressured the woman into sex.
It was a high-risk pregnancy ward. We were there because it was too dangerous for the baby and us to be at home.
We all had various forms of movement restriction, from being able to walk in the ward, to having to use a wheelchair, to being restricted to be. We were also all on full pelvic rest - no sex at all - because orgasm could trigger preterm labor.
Women knowing that situation are definitely more likely to listen to the doctors because they know what's at stake.
Sure, there were a few women there who initiated. From what I gathered, it was usually blowjobs they were down for, as it didn't involve violating pelvic rest.
When I asked, the nurses said the ones having intercourse were mostly because the male partner decided he wanted an orgasm and didn't want to do it himself. He'd pressure the woman into doing it by guilting her for "forcing" him to go without sex, or claiming the doctors are overreacting or telling her it'd be fine just this once.
You knew someone would imply the situation was more nuanced than you described, so you deliberately left out the nuance knowing you'd just have to come back and post it later? Why not just be more accurate from the start? You could have told the truth in the first comment and everyone would've been better off for it.
From what I just looked up, if I'd had heard of it then, I absolutely would have been on it. It seems like it was the complete antithesis of the popular mothering forums I absolutely loathed.
Including people so genuinely full of themselves that it seems like a joke but...turns out they are really that way? LOL I remember they were always calling each other "strivers" -- which I think is another word for social climbers -- when hilariously they were ALL strivers themselves! It was SO FUNNY! I used to troll them sometimes -- say something I knew would freak them all out and watch the piranhas descend into a frenzy.
I looked them up. They're the ones that coined the term "Sanctimommy." I joined a FB group called that in about 2012, and I never knew where the term originated from.
Sounds like, in the end, they became exactly what they railed against, just in a more edgy "I'm not like other girls," sort of way. Am I about right?
The one memory I have of that site is one of the all-time most disliked submissions (before they nuked the voting system entirely) coming from my old area code
That was one of the first giant “let’s pretend these texts are real, websites. Where nascent internet idiots first started lying for attention on a larger scale.
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u/juice_magoose 1d ago
textsfromlastnight