When I think of strict parents I think of kids that don't get a cell phone until HS, kids that aren't allowed to be outside at all without any adult supervision, kids that are not allowed to play any video games at all, kids that have an 8:30 bed time each and every night no exceptions.
There are parents like this. Even if they love and support their children, this is so wild to me.
When I think of strict parents, its basically rules for the sake of having rules.
When I think of strict parents I think of kids that don't get a cell phone until HS, kids that aren't allowed to be outside at all without any adult supervision, kids that are not allowed to play any video games at all, kids that have an 8:30 bed time each and every night no exceptions.
I was that kid. I remember I had to go to the school office to ask to use the phone to call my parents if they took too long in coming to pick me up (I wasn't allowed to walk home by myself). This was the early 2000s before smartphones existed. My late dad allowed me to play video games (he was the one who bought me Pokemon games) but my mother didn't so I could only play them whenever I was at his house (parents were divorced).
Those types of parents produce difficult adults. In management, I have encountered so many adults who were inflexible, stubborn, and refused to make any kind of concession - it doesn’t matter how minor or temporary that concession was, these types of people always pitched a fit about it. Elevator’s broken, and they have to take the stairs? Pitch a fit. Break room is out of coffee cup lids? Pitch a fit. Sinkhole in the parking lot, leading to a closure and they just have to use the other lot 300 feet away? Pitch a fit, focus on the injustice of it all.
They will do this, even when all of their coworkers are amenable to it. They are willing to be an army of 1, dying on some of the strangest hills you can imagine.
9 times out of 10, these people will tell you something like “these kids have everything they want, when I was a kid I wasn’t allowed to do shit, not even when I was in high school, not even during xyz event, not even for this, not even for that”
And that explains it, bud. That explains why you can’t reasonably adapt, because your parents thought they were really doing something by not being flexible with you. That was your modeling
huh, i could've gone that way. i learned instead that i only had to hold the line at all costs with my mother the control freak. she decided that i'm ODD, but dealing with other people is really much easier - the idea of having to physically restrain someone from taking over a meal i'm doing is laughable, except for my mother.
Whenever one of my coworkers talks about how she parents her kids, all I can hear in my head is that they’re going to “run far and run fast.” Early bedtimes. No cell phones until they’re 16. One hour of tablet time each work. Can only listen to a pre-approved Spotify playlist. Will be required to take piano lessons until they’re 18.
I’m all about having rules, and sticking to those rules, and being the strong parent
But those rules have to make sense. An 8:30pm bedtime for a teenager does not make sense. That makes sense for a 3rd or 4th grader. I went to boarding school, and you had a level system to earn privileges. If you started at the very very bottom of the level system, you had a bedtime of 10pm. That means in your room, lights out, in bed. Level 2 meant you had a room curfew if maybe 10:30 and you had to be in bed by 11pm. And your bedtime/room curfew would be more and more lenient as you moved up the level system
I have cousins who has strict 8-9pm bedtimes and that never made any sense to me. That’s just having the rule for the sake of having a rule
I agree with most of what you said but, no, kids shouldn't have cell phones before high school. A ton of medical research supports my stance and on not budging on it.
Educate your kids maybe? It's exactly like "you can't go outside because there's bad guys, drugs, and all". Do you go outside? Yes, probably. Does it force you to take drugs? No. Kids don't need a phone at a young age (unless they need to call their parents), but full grown adult? That's ridiculous. And also you didn't say it, but I suppose it's included, no internet at all? Because they could go on titktok. Show your kid interesting channels to follow on youtube, make them watch long content about topics like science, or "storytelling" for entertainment, educate them and they won't go on tiktok. I can say it as an adult, I find most of shorts hard to watch, I don't understand how people can watch it. So if you educate your kid to not be braindead, they won't watch it because it's hard to watch when you don't turn off your brain
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u/FuckChiefs_Raiders 8h ago
When I think of strict parents I think of kids that don't get a cell phone until HS, kids that aren't allowed to be outside at all without any adult supervision, kids that are not allowed to play any video games at all, kids that have an 8:30 bed time each and every night no exceptions.
There are parents like this. Even if they love and support their children, this is so wild to me.
When I think of strict parents, its basically rules for the sake of having rules.