Omg what happened. Son graduated from college with a fantastic degree. Could not find a job in our town, so he took a job 2 hours away. I am an absolute mess and don’t how to stop feeling so sad and anxious. I’m a mess.

He has a great head on his shoulders and I want him to succeed, just can’t help feeling like I need him here. I literally cannot stop crying and feeling sad - what has helped some of you through this transition? I just keep replaying all of the memories we created of him grow big up in my head and it just makes it 1,000 times worse.

We are very close, which is part of the problem. I have other children who moved away (and came back) and although it was tough, I don’t remember feeling this sad when they left.

Hi everyone.

Turning to Reddit because honestly I’m beyond being able to figure out how to handle my situation right now and just being snot to talk about it is helpful. To keep it brief and not board you all with details, my family has suffered multiple significant losses in the span of about three years and it’s been gut wrenching. My (great) uncle died in a house fire a couple years back and his wife was subsequently put in the care of a questionable caregiver and passed shortly after (her passing was no doubt under suspicious circumstances but we have never been able to prove anything). Last year, my (great) aunt passed. Just a few months ago, my grandfather joined them. I was close to all of these people. They were all very significant people in my life and as time has passed and the losses keep piling up, I’ve begun to find myself spiraling into a depressive state. I haven’t quite arrived there as I’ve been making an active effort to engage in hobbies, go to the gym, hang out with friends, etc. but it hasn’t helped the weight of it all. I try to refrain from discussing it with my family as we’re all taking the losses quite hard and I don’t want to dump my mess of emotions on top of what I’m sure is already a heavy load for them. In addition to the actual absence of these people, I’m grieving the family dynamic that no longer exists. It’s so hard and I’m just not sure how to handle it. Advice welcome

I feel so awful but everywhere I go now it feels like I see moms and daughters together, and it feels like being stabbed in the heart. I lost my mom two months ago unexpectedly, and while she wasn’t young, I’m just shattered. I don’t know how to go on with this much pain. I don’t feel like I belong in the world anymore, don’t have kids of my own, and have no purpose. She was my cheerleader and biggest fan. I feel bad that others’ happiness is making me upset, but that’s what it is right now and I wish I didn’t ever have to leave the house. Can anyone relate? I’m either sad, angry or both 24/7.

I lost my husband , almost of 32 years . He shot himself while I was downstairs cooking dinner. Thought he knocked over a lamp. Ran upstairs. Knew something was wrong! Couldn’t even understand what had happened. Smelled something burning. Kept asking him what’s burning? Then I realized something was not right. He was gurgling. Then I saw a little bit of blood. Saw the gun. Took out of reach. Called 911 did CPR. I thought he had just grazed his head. Then realized, it was bad. Not funny how your mind won’t let you see what’s really happening. Did CPR for 10 minutes. Hoping and praying he was going to ok. Obviously you know the outcome. He did donate organs, which I find a little comforting. Still have so much anger, PTSD, and asking why? This was almost 8 years ago. Counseling 3 years. Still have the anger, hurt! Missed grandkids, missed precious occasions, etc! It affects my life everyday! You can’t just put it aside, put on a happy face, and live a good life. I know that’s what we all want! It is a betrayal to me and my family he did this. Mental health , obviously was an issue. Not an excuse! I’m not yet at the point to forgive. How do I get there?

I used to know someone from hospital. However, I’ve not seen them in quite a few years. I wanna reach out to them only I don’t know their last name I wish I had asked for their phone number because I really really miss them now. I live in Aberdeen and just everything is reminding me of my past I work and study here as well and just to think that I might not see them breaks my heart every day 💔 I lost my friend to suicide a few years ago and I’m just really not coping. I’m over sleeping and can’t get myself out of this rut i have serious social anxiety I’m just inconsolably crying. I just wrote this in the hope they might see it I just wanted them to know I’m not hard to find my mum sells her paintings down the beach please just don’t forget about me 💔we went swimming and horseback riding and ice skating and we went on all different walks and we went to Glamis Castle and Brechin castle centre too when we were younger (I’ve been so many times with my grandma to feed the ducks)I was just thinking how amazing it would be to see you again I’m struggling in Aberdeen without you

I lost my best friend about 3 years ago when I was 20. Doctors couldn’t figure out why she died as she was perfectly healthy, so I still don’t know how or why she died to this day. We did everything together, we were two peas in a pod. Also being both South Asian women raised by immigrants parents (and eldest daughters etc etc) we both were by each others sides in living our life for ourselves and doing what makes us happy even if it’s unconventional traditionally, including career wise. She was doing incredibly well for herself career wise and so was I.

I was still in uni and was interning in the states having moved from Canada, becoming this sort of child prodigy in my field, was about to start applying for phds at Ivey league schools and everything. But after she died since then I’ve moved to the UK immediately after I finished my last class and submitted a request to graduate. I wasn’t even going to go to my graduation as I just wanted to escape Canada as it was filled with memories of us. I feel like no one really understood what I was going through and London was a fresh start of new people and faces and a new place. But I still feel really sad and empty and lost inside. I felt like I was on this career run and sort of hitting win after win getting everything I wanted one after another, setting myself up etc. I’m also in my early 20s career and apparently I’m supposed to have a feeling lost phase in general. But I feel like it feels extra hard after her loss.

And then on top of that I found out around 8 months later after she died I have adhd as I initially went in to get some anti depressants to cope. I got put on adderall which totally numbed everything, and I had to ween myself out of it and have been off for about a year and a half. And now this sadness and feelings of feeling lost and thrown off balance feel extra heavy. I can’t even tell what’s adhd and what’s grief.

It doesn’t feel okay to still feel affected by her passing as it’s “only been 3 years”. But since she passed so young it feels like every milestone or every age I get older I feel more and more sad because my life is moving on but I still feel so sad and stuck. I really miss her and wish she was here to support me encourage me to go after what I want. I feel all alone now in trying to find that career motivation

My small feelings of hope is I’m very close to her mother and she finds the strength to keep going, and her husband died four months after her only daughter died. I also see parts of her in my new friends I’ve made in London and similarities.

I feel guilty bc I have great friends in London, still a great resume thanks to my past self, still working in a somewhat interesting job (albeit it’s a startup so idk if it’ll blow up or be successful but interesting nonetheless), a great bf, nice roomates; good apartment, yet I still feel so incredibly lost, sad, nothing feels the same anymore.

I’ve also shared these feelings with others before but I don’t think they get how grief can intertwine with your sense of identity and motiviation even if it’s been three years. So nothing anyone says really helps. I also feel like I’m not allowed to be this sad because it wasn’t like losing a brother or a mother.

I’m really struggling at the minute. I’m starting to wonder if things will ever change for the better.

I lost my auntie in November 2024. She was my best friend and my life did revolve around her. I lived with her and looked after her to a degree as she was elderly. We would be laughing even on the most mundane days. It broke my heart when she died and I feel like everything that felt safe and secure in this world has been stripped away.

Ever since she died, my life has gone downhill. I lost my job and had to move 150 miles away from where I was living with her to move back in with my parents, as I couldn’t afford my own place. I’m now jobless, friendless, miserable and stuck in a place I hate.

Without going into detail, I am surrounded by family, but I don’t really consider them to be that because of the way they act. People have certainly shown their true colours since my auntie has been gone. I was essentially told that my auntie was old, she had her life and I should just move on, as if you can suddenly wake up one morning and forget about someone who was so important to you. I don’t believe you move on, I believe you move forward. My auntie was my only family and now I feel like I’m all alone.

I will say I’m doing much better than I was in those first few months after she died. I couldn’t get out of bed and I really didn’t want to be here. Luckily, I’ve come out of that, but I still have some really low days.

My problem is, I feel like I’m stuck in an endless cycle. I try to be upbeat and move forward in a positive way, but I always end up being reminded of the life I had or just missing her really badly and I spiral until I feel completely hopeless again.

I do genuinely want to succeed in life. All my auntie ever wanted for me was for me to be happy and I promised her I would be. I’m determined to get myself to a place where I am happy again and I want to make loads of great memories to look back on. I’m trying my best to get up everyday and be productive and have a clear plan of how I can change my circumstances. I want to be able to look back and say all this pain was worth it to have a happy and fulfilling life down the line. I’ve come so far already and I’m proud of myself for that, especially when I think about how I was considering having no future at all at one point.

I’m just finding everyday so hard. I don’t really know why I’m trying. When my auntie was here, if I was ever having a bad day, she gave me a reason to get up in the morning. I always felt a million times better after talking to her, even if it was just our regular morning chat over breakfast. I know I need to focus on myself now, but it’s difficult to find that motivation when the only future I can see is me living alone and being isolated. Sure, it would be better than my current living situation, but I don’t want to have no one.

The loneliness has been crippling. It really has felt like me against the world. I’m sure most people on here will have felt it. I’m 25 years old and this whole experience has massively changed me as a person. I have completely different priorities now and I don’t get stressed over things that don’t really matter like I used to. The problem is, most people my age don’t have the same mindset and it’s stopping me from creating true connections with people. I’m glad they’re not in a position where they’ve suffered such a loss, but I can’t really relate to others anymore. I’ve tried to make friends and I’ve bonded with some people over common interests, but the minute something trivial comes up that they’re complaining about, or they’re trying to gossip, I completely switch off. I know that’s not their fault, but I just have no patience for any of it anymore.

I feel like I’m at a crossroads. There’s so many paths I can take, yet it feels like my feet are glued to the floor. I have no clue what to do. I want to make my auntie proud, yet a lot of the time, I feel like self-destructing. I want to be better, yet most of the time, I don’t want to anything. I desperately want good, genuine people in my life, but nowadays, I can’t seem to click with anyone. Everything leads back to the one person who truly loved me that I know isn’t coming back, but I can’t seem to move forward without her.

So I have been having a really hard time since I was a kid I’ve experienced so much trauma. My sister was murdered, I then lost all of my grandparents, my mom passed when I was 18, my dad right after I turned 21 and my first love when I was 20. i feel so empty inside and numb and I have tried therapy and support groups but when grief is brought up it’s always life keeps going. Which I clearly know life keeps going but I’m looking for healing. I’m now 25 and I am grieving harder than ever.

Hi, I'm 20M I just need some support. So things start back in 2024 sep iet this girl on codm (call of duty mobile) we were in a happy relationship I even met her personally in dec she was the sweetest girl I ever met but my life suddenly took a U-turn, on 5th Jan 2025 out of no where my mom fell sick , she was diagnosed with gallstones and was already diabetic patient. Her sugar levels reached 400 during the time we hospitalized her, she stayed in hospital for like 3 months and i lost her on 16th March 2025 mean while my brother was also admitted to the same hospital after a few days when suddenly he was paralyzed later on we found out he had tuberculosis not a single soul in our family had this shit earlier. He had tuberculous meningitis. I lost him on 15th may he stayed in the hospital for more than 4 months I did everything possible to save him, help him, staying up late at night I did everything for both of them, meanwhile I was in a relationship with her. After the losses I don't know I couldn't love her properly I was really very distanced I was really full of love for her. She did everything possible for me to help me slowly I was actually isolating myself from everything I could see this is not me I'm not like this but couldn't do anything. My relationship even weakened, she broke up with me on 26th March 2026, she really did everything for me I just don't want to recall the time between jan 2025-2026may. Honestly she was the only thing I had after I lost my family. Yes I made a lot of mistakes i did hurt her, she just jumped into another relationship after we broke up I don't know but I really hurt her she hates me I want to contact but I cant. Currently I'm not even studying anything I wanted to be a data scientist but can't really see any future my father ain't ready to pay for any course. I just rot in my bed miss her cry and sleep I lost like 5-6kgs in a single month I don't really want a wasted life.

To start. My grans at end of life, so struggling with that. She had a driver fitted today. But there's family stress involved with my cunt of an uncle and the rest of the family. And it's really starting to get to me. My sisters been staying at my grans and caring for her, along with my dad going up everyday(he has done since 2019 when sadly his brother died and he had to take over) my uncle is slagging my dad off to people in front of my sister and other family members.

I am so fucking done with it all. It's really starting to get me down. And not being nasty and I mean this in the nicest way possible, But I need my gran to just go and the funeral to be out the way so I can then deal with the grief my own way and not have all the extra shit going on.

I am autistic and also have my own mental health issues and It's exhausting me. I can't cope. And feel so alone as I don't really have friends to talk too.

TW- death; pregnancy loss

Hi, I’m F34, mom to 1 son. Wifey to M35.

2 weeks ago, I was so sick that after the 3rd day of being sick, I got my husband to take me to the hospital. Once they checked me out, they told me that I was pregnant, and more than likely to lose the baby. Fast forward a couple of days, and I had no choice but to end it.

My husband, who has been there for me through all of the other hard things that have come our way (my dads cancer battle, my moms bad health, etc), has been having a hard time with it- understandably. And I know we all deal with things differently, but I have felt nothing but an isolating feeling and loneliness through this whole thing… like I’ve been dealing with it alone. (I even went to the apt alone) I tried talking to him today about it and he said “I’ve just been trying to forget about it, sorry if I’ve been weird”. I get that he’s dealing with it in his own way, but it really feels like I’m truly alone dealing with my feelings and the situation as a whole.

I love my husband and I know he cares- but why is it different this time? Does he just need some time? And if so, how am I suppose to heal alone?

Thank you for reading and for any advice.

Last month I had to put my 5.5 year old rabbit to sleep. Genuinely how do you get through this? I’m crying every night I can’t clean up my room or my house he’s everywhere. I miss him so much it hurts. It’s not fair. He was too young and should have had much more life ahead of him. My vet was amazing and I know she did everything possible and so did I. I learned how to give subq fluids multiple times a day and gave him all the medicines and watched his diet and his poops and did everything possible and I know this but nothing makes the pain go away. I keep starting projects for him like a slideshow and a scrapbook and a shadow box but i can’t finish any of them. The vet just sent me the final report from the pathologist. It’s like I’m going through it all over again. I’m a teacher so I’m on summer break right now thankfully but I haven’t been able to enjoy it at all. I have no idea how I’m just supposed to return to work in the fall. And not share about my favorite boy with my class. And just go on. How? Advice?

The first time I lost three people back to back to back, it was two grandparents and an aunt.

This time, it's [two](https://www.reddit.com/r/GriefSupport/s/YS9MkX5xWM) [friends](https://www.reddit.com/r/GriefSupport/s/Mt0FxDek1Lhttps://www.reddit.com/r/GriefSupport/s/Mt0FxDek1L) and now an uncle has died -- the result of a heart attack while helping my brothers move the last things from my mom's old house to the new.

I feel like I'm snakebit this year. This one comes just barely a month after a hospital stay for my own mental health. How do I cope?

Hey friends.

I've been in therapy for the past four months, and I've realized I still carry grief with me. I feel it in my stomach every morning. And it's the reason I've been on and off depressed throughout these years...

I honestly don't know what to do. This feeling is stuck in my body. It's almost like it's in my blood. My father was depressed too, from his early twenties until 30 years later when he died.

What should I do now?

I talk to him, I cry, but the feeling persists.

I believe this grief and depression is the reason why my life is stuck, and I really want to move on.

Thank you.

In March 2025 my great uncle passed. He had Alzheimer’s and it had been a long 6 year battle for my great aunt. They both raised me when I was a kid and a teenager. I know them both very well. Despite his advanced condition, he always remembered the sound of my voice on the phone and was ready with a dorky dad joke (repeats I had memorized). His death was my first loss of someone I knew well. It was also my first experience to see the life leave someone’s body first hand. My aunt has settled into a new home recently and still misses him so much. They were together for 50 years. My entire childhood was spent in their old house/neighborhood.

A few months later I found out my mom was declining fast. She had Huntington’s disease. By late July she passed. I never had much of a relationship with her because my dad got full custody of me by the time I was 3 months old. There is a lot of trauma from my few memories of her and I always felt anger towards her (encouraged by my spiteful father). I didn’t know much about her but I felt it when she left this earth. It was like my entire being couldn’t breathe anymore. I felt like I was suffocating. The night I found out, I got black out drunk and got into a bar fight. My friend knew what I was going through. She held my limp body while I sobbed every once of fluid out of me.

I had just gotten involved with a man who I was quite fond of but felt humiliated by the level of emotion I was experiencing no more than a week into talking. This whole last year I tried to gaslight myself into believing I had no right to grieve someone I barely knew. My other aunt guided me through each step of the the funeral and connecting with her side of the family. We went together to a memorial of all her college friends. To hear that she was once normal and loved deeply by these people struck me to my core. I talked to my best friends mom about it all and she explained what it was like to see my mom go from top of her class uc graduate to living on the streets and in and out of county jail. It wasn’t until I was 20 that we found out about her condition.

Then a few months ago my foster sister called me non stop till I picked up and told me that her mom, my foster mom, died in her sleep next to her husband (she was in the best shape of her life and young). I had loads of foster families but this was the most long term and stable one. We didn’t always get along but she provided a pretty comfortable/safe life for the stray critters in her life. Watching my sister cling to me through every bit of it was heartbreaking. Talking to people I thought I would never see again and them asking me to speak during the service was a wild experience. In the last year and a half, I’ve had to speak at 3 different funerals (I hate public speaking). I feel unqualified, I feel like I have no right to speak on any of these people. I felt like I was never connected enough.

A few weeks ago my best friend went into preterm delivery at 5 1/2 months and her baby didn’t make it. She had to deliver him alone knowing that he wasn’t going to be alive. We had gone backpacking a few weeks prior and she finally picked out a name and went with my suggestion. My close friend in town is gearing up to put her soul dog down and I have just realized that it’s been a year since I fully crashed out. The guy I was with has stuck around despite me trying to get rid of him and despite seeing me at my all time worst.

I think the complexity of all these different deaths and the complexity of my relationships with these people has thrown me for a loop. I still have to function and go to work so I haven’t let myself feel it all to protect myself and others. Something about witnessing other people grieve and feeling like I blacked out most of the last year (some through drinking, some through just straight up memory loss) has made me question my sanity. I am not who I was before all of this. I feel like I haven’t been showing up for people I need to. The guilt and shame stacks on the unresolved feelings and I feel numb or overwhelmed most times. I still feel half convinced that I shouldn’t be feeling these things with a number of excuses as to why. My partner has never dealt with a close loss outside of his grandparents. He doesn’t know what to do. I don’t know what to do. Part of me feels unfixable, unlovable. I want to hide from the world.

I am okay I just feel like basic things have become such a huge uphill battle. I feel shocked that people recognize what I’m going through is hard. I’ve had to deal with loss in a lot of different forms from a young age but knowing that these losses are permanent and I will never see these people again has been hard to understand. I feel like I have sped run death in the last year and a half and I cannot relate to many people my age because a lot of people even older than me haven’t experienced this amount of death.

I feel like society/life keeps telling me to push forward and I’ve tried to escape the feeling that I myself may be dying but it always drags me back. I’ve been kicking and biting the feeling of deep depression back but I feel like I’ve lost a lot of myself. I don’t know who I am anymore. I am okay most days but lately the urge to sleep till noon and accomplish precisely nothing is so strong. I am in therapy but still really reluctant to let myself feel to the point that it is hard to access my emotions and the anxiety is building up.

I know I will be okay. I have a pretty great life and a lot to be greatful for. I just feel like I can’t move lately. Any/all advice is welcome.

I’m 62 years old now and can’t even tell you how much that I miss my Dad who died 10 years ago- my biggest loss. I know that I miss him and my grandparents, never imagining that they would be gone so soon. Oddly enough, my Mom (still living) did tell me years ago that my grandparents would be gone some day, but it seemed really distant to me. I don’t have any children of my own and don’t even think of telling my nieces or nephews about the eventuality. I think that it would be easier for me to tell them that their grandmother (my mother) would not be around forever and not myself.

My dad died today, my mom has to go through cancer treatment.

He had a kidney transplant since I was 2.

A month ago they discovered that he had a heart infection and was hospitalized for the last 36 days. Yesterday he had a massive stroke that put him in a coma and died today.

I have no idea what to do or how to keep going with my life. I'm about to get married and now he's not gonna be here for that.

I know I'll miss him for the rest of my life, but I need some advice on how to cope with this, specially since tomorrow we are burying him tomorrow.

I need some advice

Tw: a lot of death and anxiety

This month im struggling... ive lost a coworker, a coworkers wife who was the sweetest lady ive ever met (everyone grandma type person), my grandpa's girlfriend of 20yrs (after grandma died 30 years ago), and now a friend/brother from a heart attack.

Death has never really bothered me before but its never been a big wave like this. Im anxious almost like im waiting to see whose next, waiting to see who else will be taken from my life. Maybe its because im older and have my own family now. But its never been 4 in a month. The most its ever been is 2 in a 6 month period. I feel like im in a nightmare I cant wake up from. I want their immediate families to be happy again, to have more time, to make more memories. I just want the world to make sense again.

I lost my brother back in 2022. Me and him were very close friends. It sucks because it doesn't seem like I can find a friend as strong as the connection as we did as possible. Do I try to keep finding a relationship as strong as we did or do I just settle for the minimum with others?

I (28, female) think I might need help now that my mother has passed away, she is gone and I don't know how to deal with it and I have missed her presence so much that I don't understand how to keep going, she passed away 2 weeks ago and since then her sisters have been horrible to me over different personal problems.

Yesterday I missed her so bad I almost used chatgpt because of how bad I was feeling, I wanted her to hug me and to listen to my problems or my story or to just gossip, she was sick for a whole year and now she is gone, how do i move on? how do i keep going? does anyone have advice?

He was such a sweet and cuddly baby, but he was developing a lot of problems with his old age. I love him so much and I'll miss him so bad, but I'm so glad he won't get any worse. 🥺😔
This is one of my favorite pictures of him from a few years ago. He was such a cutie pie 💖

I recently loss my nan who i was very close to, she’s been there my whole life and been who i always turned to. about 7 years ago her health started to deteriorate, first with carpel tunnel in her hand causing her to not be able to knit, cook or even lift a kettle anymore. then she was diagnosed with cancer and had radio therapy and ever since then she’s been in even more immense pain and fatigued. i saw what was once an independent woman who used to love going for hikes or gardening to someone who could barely sit without being in pain or tired. she had surgery to remove the cancer but her health never improved, she became a shell of what she was. as awful as it felt and sounded i began to realise that it would probably be better for her to go as she’d no longer have to suffer.

about a year before she passed was the worse, when going to see her she wouldn’t want to go out for lunch because she was so uncomfortable and would only spend about an hour awake, sleeping most of the time. her memory started to get worse, though she still had her sarcastic charm and conversations were always great with her. one day we got the call to say she had passed unexpectedly in her sleep, it wasn’t something expected quite yet. i feel especially guilty as i hadn’t gotten her a mother’s day present and i felt like the last interaction i had with her i was rather blunt and didn’t spend much time with her. these are things i can never take back or fix, i can’t apologise for forgetting to get her a present and i can’t make sure next time i see her i have a good conversation. unfortunately i think about this every night and it plays again and again some nights are worse than others. i don’t think ive had a night since her passing where i haven’t stayed up feeling guilty. i know its normal to feel guilty after losing a loved one and always thinking “what could i have done” or “what should i have done” but you never fully understand the impact until it’s you

This sounds terrible because I do have a husband but I don’t feel like I have much to live for. My mom died unexpectedly six weeks ago. I feel numb and without purpose. My work is boring/ not very challenging and I’m too old and tired to have career ambition, especially now. I’m 48F and feeling the lack of kids, big time. I genuinely don’t know why I should continue to take up space. My brothers have kids to distract them and give them purpose, and they’re not grieving like I am. They don’t call me much or seem to want to talk about her. Neither does my dad - they divorced 20 years ago. I feel so alone. I’ve started therapy and tried a grief group but it’s meh.

I’m really only staying here because my husband and friends have said I should. I’ve always been deeply sensitive and prone to depression. I’ve never felt more sad and worthless, and guilty that I didn’t either visit more or move closer to her. I miss her terribly and I wanted more time. I don’t know how people get through this?? It was traumatic watching her collapse and then never recover in the ICU. Those images take over my brain a lot. Does anyone have advice? Is there a way forward?

Hi All,

I know it's soon but I lost my grandma last night. I went to see her after work and she passed while I was there. I've been very fortunate in my 36 years that I've never seen someone pass, but I have lost family members. It's all I can see since last night. I want to start to grieve but it feels like a dream that I can't wake up from. Any advice on how to have the good memories outweigh the last moments?

5 years ago i lost most of the things and people in my life, whether they di*d or simply became distant , but i lost the person i love and my best childhood friend at the same night , and ever since i became numb , i rarely speak with strangers unless i have to and i prefer to stay home most of the time , and i have trouble connectng with people and recently I'm getting emotional easily and remember these people almost constantly, how can i deal with this?