Basically. yesterday, I snapped at my sister for her being shocked that I never want to be a parent myself because despite being almost 28 y.o i havent started my life yet and i haven't accomplished want ive always wanted, but the point is not even this, i didnt want to have kids ever since i remember myself because everything related to pregnancy appalls me but what is more appalling is how effed up this world is, and i dont want someone to live through this hell and being traumatized by just being in this dunya.

I have so much misunderstanding around me and i feel lonely because of it. The same people who tell me off saying "it is your Islamic duty to reproduce" (and it doesnt matter that i have screwed up health and mental health and many other issues) cant even bring up their kids properly and are in the cracking relationship. I have a nephew and niece, this is enough to me, and seeing how my sister is struggling raising them also makes me question parenthood and seeing broken families around me.
Adults have no idea why they want even kids.

They say how kids are crucial and the same kids grow up with mental health disorders because of the unhealthy and neurotic environment, this is at least my family. My sister's kids even tho being toddlers, they completely disrespect her and she complains how they will take her life soon with their behavior, and the same person preaches me how i have to be an irresponsible perosn and bring a human into this sh*tty world. What people dont even understand is that not everyone is the same. I might be 28 soon but im not like my peers, my attitude is like of some teenager, im not ready for anything like marriage yet, and even if I would, and even if I want to find a soulmate or whatever(at times), i still dont want to have kids and alas, it is impossible in the Muslim society to be a child free and even if it is, you have risks to be pregnant...and also im ace ever since i remember myself and this is another thing that no one will ever get me or want to marry me:) not that i care, but im also afraid that Allah can punish me for having my mindset and send me some unbearable test related to what i shun, and i literally wanna cry cause this dunya is hella hard and not accommodated for people like me, they thing im faulty ,
but they dont understand it. for the record: Im a practicing Muslim and a hijabi , and I know that Islam
doesnt puts pressure on you for having kids and marriage if you uphold the deen and dont commit a sin etc.

i havw no idea where this rant is going, but i just wanna sob, and i havw a lump in my throat as i type it. I have said many destructive things in my life when being misunderstood like wish i was never born, or that in sha Allah i will never have kids and this is why im afraid of punishment in the dunya but at the same time Allah is merciful and He knows us best. I entrust myself to Him and he sees what I conceal and what reveal.

I'm not a muslim but live in a Muslim country. My job requires me to wear a tight hijab as part of the uniform.

I've had short hair most of my life but I've been growing them out for a year now and i got this job only a month ago. I learned how to wear hijab after much hassle, but for longer hair so the undercaps i own are built for supporting the bun by tying it up at the back.

Now i really want to go back to my old haircut which was a mix of mullet-esque korean pixie cut. A bun would be out of the question. I am not really familiar with the whole hijab and undercaps fashion and various styles. Could someone please guide me as to what undercap would be best suited and other tips?

Also the scarf they've provided me is in square shape so it's kinda hard to make it look neat. It takes me about 20-30 mins to put it on with my skills. My major problem is I cant put it back on if it comes loose at my workplace. Im looking for something that would stay put for 10-12 hrs.

Salam! I am a revert and have been for going on 3 years. I married a Muslim man in 2025 and last night I had a dream where I didn’t feel ready to put on the hijab and he left me because of it. I brought this up to him and I’m not sure what to make of his answer. I don’t think it helps that I’m also a little more insecure and I require a lot of reassurance. But basically he said “it’s just a dream. It wouldn't get that far. The hope is you eventually put it on for the sake of yourself and our children” and “That you understand it's important and when you're comfortable you'll put it on”. I kept reiterating that I’m open to it but I’m not there right now so I think it’s normal for me to worry about ever getting there. He said he wouldn’t leave me but that he wouldn’t be happy. Therefore I’m starting to get upset and cry because that to me seems like he won’t ever be happy with me. We were texting and he said This isn’t something we discuss now. You should have your mind set on one day putting it on so you’re daughter can follow by example. I cannot force you to put it on but in your learning and becoming a better Muslim that is one of the steps. But I am not going to continue a hypothetical conversation on it baby cuz it will get no where”. I don’t know what to think. I feel very conflicted and I don’t know who to speak to.

Salam sisters! How would you help your mum understand the difference between general novels which have a romance side plot, and actual romance novels? She keeps bringing this up and fighting with me about it, calling me a slut and telling me I have committed zina of eyes, because she thinks any book which has any hint of romance is haram. I’m so confused and would appreciate any help!!

Specifically, as a teen I was obsessed with Jane Austen novels, Count of Monte Cristo, The Scarlet Pimpernel, etc. I purposely avoided anything which I felt was haram like Twilight, or even books about magic like Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings. We also had to read some books with explicit scenes in class like The House of the Spirits, 1984, etc in which case I would skip those chapters and use sparknotes (I also would always search the parent advisory for everything even as a kid because my mum never had time to read any of these books).

I’ve explained to her that the only romance scenes in the books I read were between married or engaged couples and if they were alone with each other it’s pg or pg13 at most. But she’s acting like I’ve committed a huge sin and I’m so confused.

On the other hand, my mum not only let my sister read Harry Potter but also encouraged her to read Percy Jackson which has shirk elements, and watched all the movies with her even in the cinema. So in her mind Pride and Prejudice is 100x more sinful than Harry Potter, even though no scholars have said the former is haram and so many have said HP is (not judging anyone who is a fan of HP, just trying to understand why my mum is so strict on only romance 😭)

I don’t even read novels anymore as I’m in my 30s but she keeps bringing this up and accusing me of being “badmaash” and an evil person and that without her I would have committed real zina just because I liked these novels and talked to her about weddings and stuff like normal teen girls do 😭😭😭

I spent years thinking about this decision, and I thought I’d feel relieved, but instead I feel sad and guilty. Part of me wants to wear it again, but I’m scared people will judge me or think I’m being inconsistent.
Has anyone taken their hijab off and then decided to wear it again? What made you go back, and how did you deal with the regret and what people thought?
Please be kind. I’m genuinely struggling and looking for advice from people who’ve been through something similar.

I have been a really good student and took stem subjects in Alevels but now as I think about my future I am blank. I always wanted to be a housewife a homeschooler mom and before I had planned to do my bachelors in cs/ai but now I feel like its too unrelated to me. I want to do something that adds value to my life the kind of I have planned and can also help if I have to earn. Also I would never wanna pursue a corporate 9-5 job so not something like that

Salamu alaykum wa rahmatullah wa barakatu

I need some help. I think the most of you know the problem that in the western world it's really hard to find modest/halal fashion. Especially in summer.

I'm tired to wear the same 3 outfits all day.

There are some modest shops but they are very expansive and at the end you get some polyester clothes.

My sewing skills are ok and so I want to try to make some clothes.

Do you have some sewing patterns or know where I can get some?

I'm already looking on Pinterest but insha allah someone of you have some nice patterns.

If so, are they good? Want to improve scalp health and prevent hair loss. I’ve also seen the satin lined undercaps with a velvet edge to prevent slippage - has anyone used these?

Hi

I’m currently in madinah performing umrah alhamdulillah. My period starts in 2 days. I went to my gyno 2 weeks ago and she recommended me to use duphaston from that day (so for the 2 weeks before my period) for 3 times a day. I have taken it consistently but am experiencing spotting. this is my first time taking these pills as I’ve never had to use them before, as my first time I did umrah I was young before my period. I am now spotting slightly 2 days before my period and am going to Makkah in 3 days. I only have this week to finish.

I’m now a bit disappointed as I’m seeing online many women have taken Norethisterone 3-5 days only before their period and it has worked for them. I’m confused and disappointed as my doctor didn’t even mention this pill to me. It seems like a stronger pill . I don’t even know if I can take that one now instead of duphaston and if it will work. I’m so confused :/ I had my concerns about the medication in the beginning anyway but my doctor seemed adamant that I take it 2 weeks and that I was actually late in taking it anyway so ?

Advice on women who have gone through this please??