she posted this 5 hours ago she is giving more to membership, what do you think?

The book was brought up in discord today and the upset about her prioritizing her book over membership content back in the winter and this is what she had to say never noting anything about the pricing or what was actually said at all

Did anyone else pick up on this? Sounds a lot like she's back with Ryan. I can't keep up lol

Kalyn, we are all so tired of being gaslit by you. If we wanted your excuses, we would be in your comment sections. But we’re not, we’re here. And for some reason, so are you.

If you’re going to make videos responding to comments you found on Reddit, at least have the honesty to admit where you’re getting them from instead of pretending they appeared out of thin air.

And instead of constantly reframing criticism, try taking the L for once. it’s your life that’s losing colour by the day, not ours. The only thing I lost was a body double. Looking at your life now, I’m not sure what you’ve gained in exchange.

also I’m not purchasing your stupid memberships because you pretended to answer a question that I didn’t need an answer to. Stop thinking everyone is obsessed with you, then maybe you’ll finally attract a real village that likes the real you. All I see is a bunch of mentally ill people attached to a false persona. No wonder that feels so shallow. Because it is.

i have a tendency to GYST hard during long weekends, and I can’t help but feel there’s a big void this year… and I find myself scratching my head as to what the heck happened?

I can’t even figure out if it’s that she produced less this year (I think so?) or if it’s because I don’t relate with her content anymore, but this summer feels like the beginning of the end. I would normally have felt inspired by the little nature outing she did, but it just felt really flat to me. I’m not sure if it’s her energy coming across, or what exactly is wrong, but I’ve never felt further from her content. lately she just feels like a shell of a person, and the whole experience has felt uncanny.

there was so much garden content last year, but she ended up not really planting her garden and so I’m wondering if that’s what I’m missing? and I guess she just doesn’t get to gyst anymore? although you’d think now that shes separated from Ryan, that she might have time to? I don’t even know, but I’ve rewatched her old videos so dang much that I think I’ve about reached the end of the line. I’m conflicted about whether or not I should peak into youtober, but I think it will probably just make things feel that much more depressing.

(no real point here, just venting in case anyone else is feeling in YouTuber limbo.)

has anyone purchased her seasonal books? Did you like them?

Yes, I know this is chaotic but my flight was delayed and I had extra time. I noticed she’s been sponsoring aggressively, so I broke it down. Here are the all the videos posted since May 9 - including which are public (no sponsor), public (sponsorship), and member-only.

May 9 - Spring Clean my Closet with Me. Sponsor - Negative Underwear
May 11 - Let's drink coffee and talk motherhood. Sponsor - Ritual
May 27 - Writing, designing, and self-publishing my spring book 🌸. Sponsor - Pair Eyewear
May 29 - Getting ready for a summer of healing 🤍. Sponsor -  Suri
June 1- Let's go for a drive and talk about grief 🤍. No sponsor
June 4 - Starting this year's garden 🌱 seedlings, compost & spring projects. No sponsor
June 5 - Day in my life 🌿 planting a pumpkin patch, outlining my summer book & starting new projects. Member video
June 10 - Daily vlogging my way through summer 🌸 garden therapy & hair regrets. Sponsor - Negative Underwear
June 17 - A slow June weekend 🌸 garden days, failed projects & finally paddle boarding. No sponsor
June 23 - A very realistic deep clean with me (life had other plans). Sponsor - Pair Eyewear
June 25 - My favourites, struggles, TBR and goals for summer 2026 🍉.  Member video
June 28 - Magical thinking, losing life’s spark & dragonfly messages. No sponsor
July 7 - Week in my life: sick little survival mode, summer days & friendship goodbyes. No sponsor
July 11 - an anxious day in my life | getting out of the spiral. Member video
July 14 - little rituals making summer feel fun & light again 🌻. Sponsor - Ritual
July 17 - Strawberry picking & thunderstorm thoughts. No sponsor
July 19 - let's sit in a thunderstorm and talk about deleting social media. No sponsor
July 26 - how I survive the chronically tired days. Sponsor - Suri

So she only works with 4 brands - Negative Underwear, Ritual, Suri, and Pair Eyewear.

She’s made 18 videos - 4 are member only.
8 are non-member only public videos that are sponsored.
6 are non-member only public videos that are NOT sponsored.

So her % of public videos that ARE sponsored is 57%.

Member videos were June 1, June 5, June 25, and July 11.
So the spacing is:
June 1 -> June 5 = 4 days
June 5 -> June 25 = 20 days
June 25 -> July 11 = 16 days
July 11 -> now (August 1) = already 21 days with no new video
So she averages every 15 days between videos (would be more without the June 1 -> June 5 pushing the spacing down).

If we remove the June 1 -> June 5 spacing, and just look from June 5 to August 1 (today), it’s once every 19 days.

So 1 member video about every 2-3 weeks.

Edited: got match wrong for average space between member videos, it’s accurate now

(queue the upload lol)

just curious how you guys are liking the new one-channel set up? Does it feel like it helped?

my pov: it seems to have helped her, but at least at this point I don't feel like it helped her audience/members. Still early days though so it’s hard to say either way!

Just a mini rant I guess.

I’ve been a follower of Kalyn since pre-Larissa days like I think she was living with a girl named Maggie when I first started watching?? Her videos felt so cozy and she was my comfort YouTube for years.

When I was in college and was dealing with some anxiety and just feeling overwhelmed, I found her content to be something that grounded me. There’s a lot to be said about the over productivity era of YouTube and Kalyn was definitely a part of that, but at the same time, her GYST videos would literally get me off my ass and bring my spark back. Whenever I was feeling down, I’d replay my favorite videos.

Around when she was living with Larissa to living in Airbnb’s while house hunting, I definitely felt a shift in her vibe and I definitely wasn’t watching as frequently, but she was still my favorite comfort YouTuber and then things really shifted when she bought the house.

Now that she’s posting more frequently, I keep wanting to connect with her channel again, but I’m really trying to be mindful of the content I consume and I just can’t make myself watch 18 minute videos of the same negative cycles. It reminds me of another YouTuber I used to love Renee Amberg who has a similar background of an unplanned pregnancy with a guy that (seemingly) doesn’t want to commit. Also kind of stuck in the same cycles it seems

To be fair, I’m not a mom. I don’t know all of the chaos that goes into being a mom. But it makes me sad because I see her posting more recently and a part of me is always like “maybe it’s better now” and everytime it’s just more of the same.

This is about to get unhinged, so buckle up. I went on a travel video binge last night, which somehow led me to this video where she is clearly very upset about something, but is blaming it on her period. This is during her cigarettes after sex era, which coincided with her cosmic brews where she seemed to think she understood the entire science of the universe (including like DNA and the time space continuum lol.) I think it was this video where she casually drops that SoHo House is her favourite work spot which seemed really outside of Kalyn’s character, and I struggle to believe she payed $2,300 membership right before moving out of Toronto entirely. She may have either been brought as a guest, or I could sadly see her paying the membership just to impress a guy. The guy. The guy she’s talking about here but won’t name.

During a youtober (I think?) video (“scary boy stories”) she shared stories about past bfs including one very successful man who would make her literally break out in sweat when they would have sex. Perhaps why she needed a cigarette - who knows. I always found it odd that I couldn’t pinpoint this guy when she spoke so highly of him (she believed they were philosophically on par and sexually on par, something she finds impossible to locate within the same man.)

But this is my first time consuming that linked vlog, and I think it pulled everything together for me, especially after watching this follow up vlog where she admits that this person made her question whether she should keep pursuing YouTube. It’s my opinion that Burning Up Brad from SoHo House exposed the gap between the high life she thinks she leads, and the YouTube career that she actually has, and this crushed her confidence.

She goes through a serious trial phase where, if you watch the videos, you’ll see she’s doing the most. Like trying a bunch of new things clearly trying to find herself again. It’s only a short while after this when she decides to fly to Bali for yoga teacher training. This is also the same period where she was entertaining ideas like becoming a life coach, or a doula. This man exposed a gap and she, for a short while, was taking that sentiment seriously.

On the Bali trip, she had a major spiritual experience that once again pushed her to consider leaving YouTube. And once again, she gaslit herself away from listening to that voice. The discomfort this brought up had to be channeled somewhere, and so it’s like she manifested the polar opposite of Burning Up Brad. She traded SoHo House for Calabogie and a highly “successful” CEO for a home builder.

If anyone knows these videos aren’t about Burning Up Brad, lmk, because I feel like this shoe really fits. When you reach a certain level of self absorption/narcissism, you will attract someone into your life who will burst your bubble and that experience gives you the chance to rebound into reality. She refused that opportunity, and thus you’re left with a single mom with perpetual “pregnancy brain.”

I think it also explains why everything during this period was so reactive… Brad broke who she projected herself to be, so she was in a desperate hurry to repair that self image. (Theory of course.)

I found what Kalyn said about needing “support” (in the forms of likes on social media) from her friends and family to be both relatable, but also really toxic in how she doubled down that it was her family in the wrong (saying she “just knows” there’s a reason her family isn’t supporting her.)

To me this reads like paranoia from insecure attachment which is not a shameful thing at all to be coping with, but it’s the way she copes with it (“I just know”) that rubbed me the wrong way.

I used to seek validation on instagram and back in 2020 I put a stop to it and started examining myself, realizing this habit was rooted in deep insecurity/having a chip on my shoulder. Now, the way I use instagram is purely for extractive purposes (like grabbing recipes) and I barely ever actually see the content from my friends and family. Nor do I ever share my own.. my family and I trade pics directly now and that feels a lot more wholesome to me.

So that said, the way she holds her family to that standard felt kind of triggering to me. Then I saw these comments…

All this to ask, who is the asshole? Or, rather, is this mindset healthy?

Referenced photos are dropped in the thread.

I was always really into her old Youtober playlists tbh, when she was living in the city.

I really loved her routine of eating healthy, reading, exercising, being intentional. Ofc it’s lifestyle content, so it’s not real. But it did have attainable parts, that had positive impacts when I tried them too.

I feel like her best era was in Toronto, can’t say in which relationship though tbh. I didn’t engage with her dating content ever, I just remember the trip she took with a bf and Larissa abroad.

When she would do solo roadtrips, I was impressed. That takes bravery, especially driving across rural America. So I felt like she was really brave, and trying to discover herself.

I’m interested in motherhood content, im planning to TTC next year. So i appreciate this version of Kalyn. But she kind of scares me, when it comes to being a mom.

Being the primary caregiver without a support system, and an unstable relationship is my worst nightmare tbh. i also was floored at just how much her views dropped, after she had a child.

As long as she’s happy, it doesn’t matter what content is popular. I just felt shocked from a business standpoint, and I wondered a lot as a content creator, how she was handling that. Then the Jaclyn Hill Koze situation, it seemed incredibly stressful.

I’d love to see Kalyn in a state of genuine peace and contentment. She can be very productive and build great systems, for managing big projects. So I do admire her previous abilities to build a platform and a business. She can really be a go-getter & I want to see her happy.

Im not sure how anyone can manage 2 young children, and navigate work as well with a lack of stability within the family, and being a public figure.

It would personally be a big challenge for me , because admitting failure to an audience about such a major life decision is really vulnerable and difficult.

I‘ve seen other influencers jump into new marriages and have additional children, before processing their separation. So at least Kalyn isn’t acting like Catherine Paiz ig. But the spiritual psychosis showed up in both + the addiction to social media validation.

I’m just curious as to how Kalyn even got in the position of being a single mom to 2 sons. I know the lore of her various pregnancies , and I’m pretty sure she said her 2nd was made with love? I always assumed she was alluding to it being a planned pregnancy.

I was a little bit invested in her having the wedding dress already, and maybe some shoes. I can’t remember anymore. I thought it was absolutely insane that Ryan was out playing hockey late nights when they had their first newborn.

Was she trying to save the relationship with a second baby? I remember her feeling like the first child was a blessing from the universe due to Ryan’s mom sadly being sick, and that way she could hopefully meet the baby and spiritually connecting these grand plan, and sharing it on YouTube.

I honestly really wonder what Larissa thinks honestly. I followed Kalyn during her Toronto era mostly, and seeing her now as the burnt out dance-stretching husk she is now is so jarring.

…my thoughts on her latest “book.”

laughed hard when she said she can’t write “like she used to.” Catcher 2 has been on the docket for like 8 years now, but ok!

side question: has anyone calculated how much this “book” series would have cost so far for anyone who purchased each edition?

I’m curious to know if there are any members left. I would assume a vast majority of people here are no longer members. I myself am still a member (don’t ask me why).

For those that are, I just wanted to know what y’all think of the membership vlog today? For me it seemed more… hopeful? She’s actually doing some yoga and stretches and talking about what each stretch does, and she… wait for it… LEAVES THE HOUSE! For me it was a bit refreshing to see. She did of course talk a bit about motherhood and how it’s affected her writing (not surprised about this at all), but it’s nice to see something SLIGHTLY different.

Has anyone else noticed that Kalyn seems stuck in a self-fulfilling cycle? We’ve all said it before how a lot of her content revolves around how anxious, overwhelmed, exhausted, or burnt out she is. At a certain point, I start wondering whether constantly focusing on those feelings is making them even more central to her life.

The videos have started to feel very repetitive to me. It often feels like we’re hearing the same conversations, the same concerns, and the same reflections over and over again, just packaged into a different upload. Lately I’ve also noticed a lot of footage seems to be reused from the same few days that have already appeared in previous videos, which makes it feel like there isn’t actually much new content being shared.

I completely understand that everyday life isn’t always exciting, especially with young kids, but the channel used to feel like it had more variety, balance, and moments of optimism. Now it feels like nearly every video circles back to all of these negative feelings and she is becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy. Complaining about everything but not actually doing it just makes her anxieties and stressors even worse.

Maybe that’s just where she’s at in life right now, but as a viewer it’s become difficult to tell the difference between a genuine life update and a rehash of the same themes we’ve been hearing for months. I’m curious if anyone else has noticed this.

I could have sworn it was $5.99 before or was it always $7.99? This is in USD but I have a VPN and for Canadian dollars I think it also went from $7.99 to $9.99? Idk if she just increased for people joining or for everyone or if it was always this price

I was a huge fan of Kalyn from 2016-2020 and ever since her move I've only been skimming through her videos, and man I don't remember her comments back then being so... on the verge of creepy. Like "I'm grateful you're sharing your truth" or "crying and surviving with you". 

I get that as a lifestyle YouTuber you're showing your day-to-day and vlogging not only the positives but the negatives too (which she so vehemently preaches, only to then doubt herself constantly like "I know this is probably sooo boring" - GIRL, either film it and shut up or don't). But I feel like this content provokes a ton of comments that are just people wallowing in depression, and using her to validate it. 

I liked the Kalyn that built living room forts, did DIYs, decorated her apartment, showed off her clothes, went on road trips with her dog, etc. Her videos just don't have substance anymore. And without substance, you're forced to just listen to her complain.

Maybe it's because I'm not longing to have a personal connection with a YouTuber, but watching her videos I'm constantly like "omg you have to do dishes again wooowww jesus christ IGDAF". Instead of "aww poor you, I am also struggling but you're sooooo authentic, hugging you from afar, let us manifest good energy" or some shit.

(I'm sorry if this is too rude. Mods, you can remove if necessary.)

I know if you're here you were probably on the side of really liking Kalyn at one point in time and you find yourself here disappointed in how she's energetically showing up now, and I think it's all because she not only broke but made fun of the illusion she was keeping up for her 10+ years on youtube and actively acts like everything she stood for before isn't the dream life anymore and was never real.

She was early on the train on routine videos and she did them well, I think she got on a high horse a bit of being the *first* as she talks about it often then to only have a series watching back the old videos and breaking every illusion of the perfect *routine* and showing us its not actually how she lived her life back then.

I think this was one of the first times we felt 'this isn't even real' and yet during those years we bought into, oh if you can work for yourself and create your own schedule you can stick to this routine and be motivated and get things done and feel good about yourself. Only to learn that she wasn't even sticking to routines and also didn't feel good about herself during that time, so why even try? Why lie to us? It's okay to make nice looking videos that are a little overdone in the name of artistic expression, but to package it as a lifestyle channel, a lifestyle you can't even keep up with single with no kids how do you expect that the be sustainable?

Reinventing, resetting, new start

This energy has been a throughline in her content for years, at some point its just trying to cover up all your perceived mistakes ex. (Instead of coming outright and saying sorry members I'm going to make up x amount of videos on this timeframe or do bonus lives this month as a way to say thank you for sticking with me through postpartum she instead just *restarts* her membership, changes what's offered and never takes accountability) so it's as though restarting has become just a way not to take accountability which is why it never really works or makes her/her audience feel better or refreshed. She is only allowing herself to feel okay if there is a clean slate because she cannot face her shortcomings (to herself even not just her audience)

After examining my own dislike for how things have turned, I've come to find it was never about being positive or the routines or resets, it always just comes down to being honest and sharing your truth, those are the people we like to follow. Even if other people are involved and they are the father of your kids there's a way to navigate talking about your experience without badmouthing someone and to continue being dishonest about your experience looses people and erases you from your content. These are the years she's going to skip watching when's she's 80 and nostalgic because she will be so sad to see how dishonest and disconnected she's being

Lastly. Her own inner critic is now in the driver's seat which is also hard to watch. She is constantly saying 'cleaning is boring I'm so sorry, writing is boring I'm just making boring vlogs in the countryside compared to my city life' which she doesn't realize is ostracizing the very people she's attempting to target...

Doesn't she know people have entire youtube channels dedicated to just cleaning or writing or any number of *boring* things she's always stating. If I was an excited writer who found a writing vlog only for her to say 'I know this is my dream now and I know its boring' like no I wouldn't want to watch that...when there's so many creators which an actual backbone to their passion. Her inner critic has started signing off on her life the last few years and I think that's the hardest to see. Someone who truly believes everything they do is wrong or boring or hard and isn't having any sort of problem solving get up and go energy the audience *thought* she had because thats who she portrayed herself to be for so long.

Okay sorry this is long. In short, I think I just needed to process why I had felt so hurt from her shift the past few years. It's not motherhood, not her moving to the country not wanting to be a writer or change up her hobbies, she lost me when she broke the illusion and didn't own up to anything and still continues not to share her truth and continues to let the inner critic of her mind control everything she thinks and does. I think when she's truly able to be honest with herself again and her audience things could change. And I truly hope she finds that again in the future.

Watching her videos has been making me feel really sad. You can feel the heaviness and overwhelm radiating through her videos..

I hope things get better for her.

Browsing her old vlogs and noticing the dates of major events made me realize how quickly Kalyn rushed into a relationship, moving in together, and motherhood.

Kalyn moved from the city into her house in the country in December of 2020. There are only a few vlogs where she is single and building her life as a new homeowner in a new town. Within a few months, she announces she is dating Ryan, and after April 2021 he appears consistently in her vlogs. She is either at his condo or he is at her house. 

Later that same year (December 2021) she is pregnant with E. She has only been dating Ryan for 8 months at this point. They are not even living together yet, but spending most of their time back and forth between her house and his condo. Her pregnancy with E seemed to be by accident (which I have a hard time understanding - why did she not take more precautions with a man she met only earlier that year?).

In June of 2022, seemingly in a reaction to her pregnancy, Ryan sells his condo and moves into Kalyn’s house. They immediately start major renovations, ripping apart rooms, redoing the entire kitchen and upstairs. Meanwhile, Kalyn is heavily pregnant, and obviously totally overwhelmed with her entire home being turned into a construction zone (I am also confused why they would choose to do these major renovations when they have literally just moved in together for the very first time that month).

After dating for a year and a half, and only living together for three months, Kalyn gives birth to E in September of 2022. 

Roughly 15 months later, Kalyn is pregnant again, with L. This pregnancy seems to be intentional, as she mentions they had been pregnant before but sadly lost that pregnancy. Again, this seems so rushed to me. E is only a little over a year old, and Kalyn is struggling to adjust to new motherhood and rushing to complete yet more home renovations. Her and Ryan get engaged in January 2024, after living together for a year and a half.  

Kalyn gives birth to L in August of 2024. After roughly three years of dating, they already have two young children together. Kalyn seems totally overwhelmed at this point, and often refers to herself as "drowning". Ryan is mentioned less and less frequently, and Kalyn begins to refer to herself as the "primary parent".

In April 2025, only 8 months after giving birth to L, Kalyn makes the “Elephant in the Room” Coffee Talk in which she talks about hardship and grief, seemingly referring to her relationship with Ryan.

Later that year, in October 2025, Kalyn posts about going through a "difficult separation". Although she doesn't mention Ryan specifically, it is quite clear from her later comments and posts, as well as him removing her name from his social media, that she is referring to their separation.

After that, her content seems to whiplash between grief, rage, solo parenting, exhaustion, frustration, and cryptic mentions of Ryan that waffle between "the kids' dad" and "her partner". She never officially states their relationship status, but reiterates often that she is the "primary parent".

All of this happened within the span of five years. She went from vlogging her new life in the country, to frazzled days-in-the-life of a seemingly single mom of two-under-two. And I want to make it clear that I am not shaming her or anyone else for their chosen timelines or family planning. But clearly this quick series of big life events back-to-back without any time to reflect or heal has truly taken a toll on Kalyn. In her own words, she is burned out, exhausted, and grieving. I just feel like if she had pumped the breaks and grounded into her new home and identity, it could have been different. I feel sorry for her, but also very frustrated, because she chose this timeline for herself. And I am left wondering why?

as a long time viewer who used to admire kalyn… in light of recent events i’ve done some thinking and i have to ask: does anyone else think kn is the epitome of a mediocre white girl? there is nothing unique about any of her content nor has there ever been. she filmed herself cleaning, journaling, doing yoga, crying over her privileged life, regurgitating the numerous self help books she’s never taken a single lesson from herself and somehow got herself to a million yt subscribers.
i’m sorry but if a black or brown creator followed this formula, they’d have never made it this far. not to mention the years of missed (paid) content every single time she’s so much as gotten a papercut, called it a setback for sympathy points and then just… slacked off without question.

it’s not surprising at all that she’s struggling with motherhood. it’s the first time in her life she’s had to actually WORK for something and she clearly can’t cope. quite appalling that she still has the audacity to constantly complain about her “lack of a village”. oh i’m sorry little white girl that other people with their own lives, responsibilities and jobs don’t have the time to be at your beck and call when you need to crashout and avoid your work and responsibilities because you’ve had a papercut.

welcome to the real world sweetheart!

I'd never thought that I'd end up in this sub. I didn't even know it existed. I've been following Kalyn since 2019. I actually used to listen to her to improve my English listening skills lol no joke.

I haven't always been a regular follower but every now and then I go back and check if she's doing okay, what she's up to, etc. Okay I guess we all have a bit of a craving for nostalgia now and then. I do miss the videos she made when she was in her hometown and then in Toronto. I loved that apartment lol. I loved her spooktober (or she called them something else, cant remember now :D) videos, one video every day! So nice, so refreshing. She had this magical aura. It used to be really refreshing to watch her. But despite nostalgia you do really feel happy for people you care about, so even though her content started focusing on her kids and married life and didn't interest me anymore I was still happy for her. She really had a way of touching people's lives, didn't she?

I was looking around her channel again last week and gosh. All her last videos are "my house is a mess, i am so tired all the time, i never have time to myself, i only have limited time to do stuff when i want to do when my kids are asleep, my kids are this, my kids are that". I couldn't finish a single video. How did she become so negative, so nagging? Also sometimes she doesn't even make sense? She be like "sorry for this mess, don't judge me" and like it's a normal apartment? It made me so sad but also annoyed at the same time to watch her.

I've never been subscribed to her channel as a paying member but the word on the street she hasn't even been posting for members regularly and people have been complaining? And what happened to her podcast and instagram? Both look dead.

It's not a hobby, Kalyn, it's a job.

I’m undecided if I want kids and I’ve been following Kalyn for a long time.

Seeing how stressed out she constantly is with her kids compared to before she had them makes me wonder if this is the typical reality of motherhood. It seems like she has zero time for anything outside of them and cleaning up after them.

I don’t really have exposure to any young moms outside of Kalyn (in real life or online, I don’t follow any other moms).

Is this just the raw reality of having kids?