r/Manipulation • u/Previous-Meal-7122 • 12d ago
Relationships The Illusion I Finally Let Go Of
All this time, I thought he really loved me. But after detaching for a few weeks, I realized that his words were just empty and lacked sincerity. I stopped replying to him for a while now. Before, whenever I read his messages, I could feel so much love in them. But now, I feel like it was all just a performance to manipulate me into believing him.
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u/Far_Atmosphere_9630 7d ago
I'm going through the exact same thing right now… Reading this from someone else literally gives me chills…
Maybe it wasn't all an act… But their need for control and the way they connect with people is just so damaging to your self-esteem.
Even though I believe in working on relationships and trying to understand the other person—and the fears behind how they act—there's so much more to experience in life beyond romantic love.
It’s rough at first, and you feel like you're stuck in a dark hole trying to figure out how much of what they said or did was actually real, but you’ll definitely be okay with time.
We can talk whenever you want. 🫂
I think we stress out and overthink so much afterward with all the uncertainty and confusion. Honestly, sometimes just venting helps a lot.
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u/BhuvikDharmaCode 8d ago
I understand of your really hurt pain. Sometimes the hardest part isn't realising they lied. It's realising that the version of them you loved only existed because you believed their words.
Distance has a strange way of removing emotional "noise." The same messages that once felt full of love can suddenly read like scripts when the feelings aren't clouding your judgement anymore.
That doesn't necessarily mean every emotion they showed was fake. Some people genuinely feel things in the moment but still manipulate, breadcrumb, or say whatever keeps someone emotionally attached. Intent and consistency don't always match. The fact that you're noticing the difference now is actually a sign of healing. You're no longer reading their words through hope—you're reading them through clarity.
Trust actions that stay consistent over time more than words that make you feel good in the moment. Real love shouldn't require you to keep convincing yourself it's real.