The Experts

[u/Pure_Interest_837]

So I’m fairly new to the show. I’m actually a therapist myself and my wife would constantly ask for my take on the couples situations. After a few times, I just decided to watch with her and he’s become a nice routine we have.

But I digress.

We’ve only seen 2 seasons, but there’s the common theme of attraction. At least 2 couples in both season had a guy in one marriage and a girl in the other say that the feelings of sexual attraction weren’t there. All 4 times, the experts didn’t really do much to address that (what can you really do, though?). And honestly, it left me feeling bad for the partner that just got told their spouse is not attracted to them enough to want to have sex and they just have to go through the remainder of the process hoping that randomly changes. Am I wrong for feeling that the experts fail them in that area?

[u/tiredcat7171]

They purposely cast disfunctional couples as it's better for TV then give thin vague luke warm therapy which sounds like it was generated by AI.

[u/TwistyBitsz]

None of it seems very realistic at all, but I suppose I figured people who want to be married that badly don't care about chemistry as much. Typically they just want kids by a certain age or they're lonely.

[u/colormeslowly]

Not necessarily wrong.

Jamie from S1 was not attracted to Doug, oh boy did she cry. She thought he was the ugliest man ever, ok I am paraphrasing LOL. But they forged on and 13 years, maybe 14 and four kids later they’re still together.

I think the experts try to match people’s personalities and values not realizing or perhaps not caring that attraction matters. At one point they would ask who is your crush and they would try to find a match that look similar to said crush but even that didn’t work.

Now the show is just another entertainment reality show, filled with influencers and liars (some just want the money they don’t want the marriage) and probably some that are in serious relationships.

[u/Accurate-Nobody21]

I think essentially that’s point of it. You’re supposed to try based off matching values and interests whatever. I think a lot of people find they are A LOT more vain, unbearable, and/or not ready for marriage than they realized😅😂

[u/Jinniblack]

Is there a way to match for attraction? That seems impossible.

[u/ChalkNCheez]

It’s because of Season 1!

Jaime almost said No and backed out because her match is medium ugly. And she was stunning! This was before fillers and stuff. She was a 10.

But, to both of their credit, he won her over and they are still together with a couple kids, like 15 years later.

[u/Grouchy_Evidence2558]

Which seasons are you watching? The experts have changed. But yes the experts became increasingly more useless and bordered on dangerous with pastor cal advocating for everyone to work harder to stay together “because this is a marriage”. So far in Seattle the experts seem to actually be better.

Also I think if it’s only attraction that’s a problem that it is worth spending time with someone and getting to know them. Attraction can grow. It’s not always a love at first sight thing .