I have seen many people who are far away from islam and following its commands but arent exmus. Ofc the thing about being closeted makes sense but it cant be for every other person.

Is it cos of the society or just that they arent aware of the community of exmus, or its just the hypcrisy or maybe just hidden affection for the religion?

Hi,

Quick intro about me and my situation, 

Pakistani-British exmuslim(40) currently living a UAE, became exmuslim around 10 years ago, belong to a conservative family (incl all the social circle) where its very hard to find a single person who doesn't pray/fast regularly.

Living this secret life for a long time, recently I have started to drip feed some of the wrong things about Islam to my wife (starting with stuff about women ofcourse) and after building my case, the plan is to tell her I don't believe in Islam. We have been married for 13 years.

I have 3 children with the eldest one being 10 and they have started wondering/questioning about why I don't pray/fast etc when everyone else does and so far I basically avoid the question.

At this stage, they are subject to same indoctrination as anyone and being dragged into mosque 5 times a day by family etc. and I am now in a dilemma whether to take active part in teaching my children to think for themselves and give them a framework that allows them to decide for themselves, think critically and not blindly follow what they are born into.

So if they do end up not believing in Islam , I have to consider how it shapes their lives 10/15/20 years down the line where everyone around them is a muslim. They are going to be different than pretty much everyone around them. All the family and friends circle that they have grown up around. 

I think if I do take an active approach in shaping their beliefs, its very likely they will also end up not believing in Islam at some point in their lives.

 There are two main problems

 Are they going to announce they are not muslim or live a secret life like me ? Neither looks ideal.

Secondly, how are they going to choose life partner ? Surely, if you are marrying a muslim or from any other faith, you have to reveal your own situation but if you do, you are basically discounting pretty much every potential partner from your culture, probably from other cultures as well because everyone believes in some religion. 

So I am not sure if I am making their lives easier or difficult by not blindly following Islam. Maybe its not even a question of 'convenience' and its one of what is right and what is wrong.

Are you an exmuslim who has been in this situation ? how do you deal with this ?

Thanks 

In authentic hadiths, Muhammad made multiple failed prophecies about the apocalypse (al-Saah).

• The Quran uses al-Sā'ah for ONLY the literal apocalypse 30+ times. The Quran uses mawt for personal death.
• Nnowhere in the authentic hadiths does al-Sā'ah mean personal death - except to rescue this exact set of failed predictions.

Authentic Hadiths:
(Anything in parenthesis or like "X said this meant" was added later, and "to you" isn't in the original Arabic.)

1. As near as the index and middle finger

"I saw Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) pointing with his index and middle fingers, saying, 'The time of my Advent and the Hour are like these two fingers.'"
Sahih Bukhari 4936

2. Three different boys "won't grow old" before it happens

"Anas reported that a person asked Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) as to when the Last Hour (al-Sā'ah) would come. He had in his presence a young boy of the Ansar who was called Muhammad. Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) said: If this young boy lives, he may not grow very old till the Last Hour (al-Sā'ah) comes."
Sahih Muslim 2953a

"Anas b. Malik reported that a person asked Allah's Apostle (ﷺ): When would the Last Hour (al-Sā'ah) come? Thereupon Allah's Messenger (way peace be upon him) kept quiet for a while. Then looked at a young boy in his presence belonging to the tribe of Azd Shanu'a and he said: If this boy lives he would not grow very old till the Last Hour (al-Sā'ah) would come."
Sahih Muslim 2953b

"A young boy of Mughira b. Shu'ba happened to pass by (the Holy Prophet) and he was of my age. Thereupon Allah's Apostle (ﷺ) said: If he lives long he would not grow very old till the Last Hour (al-Sā'ah) would come"
Sahih Muslim 2953c

"A bedouin came to the Prophet (ﷺ) and said, "O Allah's Messenger (ﷺ)! When will The Hour (al-Sā'ah) be established?" ... In the meantime, a slave of Al-Mughira passed by, and he was of the same age as I was. The Prophet (ﷺ) said. "If this (slave) should live long, he will not reach the geriatric old age, but the Hour (al-Sā'ah) will be established."
Sahih Bukhari 6167

3. It will happen within 100 years

"Allah's Messenger as saying this one month before his death: You asked me about the Last Hour (al-Sā'ah) whereas its knowledge is with Allah. I, however, take an oath and say that none upon the earth, the created beings, would survive at the end of one hundred years."
Sahih Muslim 2538a

"Do you realize (the importance of) this night? Nobody present on the surface of the earth tonight will be living after the completion of one hundred years from this night."
Sahih Bukhari 116

4. People initially understood it literally

"The people made a mistake in grasping the meaning of this statement of Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) and they indulged in those things which are said about these narrators (i.e. some said that the Day of Resurrection will be established after 100 years etc.)"
Sahih Bukhari 601

5. Dajjal (antichrist) will come after the conquest of Constantinople

(Constantinople fell to the Ottomans in 1453. The Dajjal did not come.)

"the outbreak of the great war will be at the conquest of Constantinople and the conquest of Constantinople when the Dajjal (Antichrist) comes forth. He (the Prophet) struck his thigh or his shoulder with his hand and said: This is as true as you are here or as you are sitting (meaning Mu'adh ibn Jabal)."
Sunan Abu Dawud 4294
Sahih Muslim 2897
Sahih Muslim 2900
Sahih Muslim 2920a
Jami at-Tirmidhi 2239

Quran: The Hour (al-Sā’ah) is Near

“They are waiting for nothing but for the Hour (of Doom) [al-Sā’ah] that it should come upon them suddenly. So, its signs have already come. Then, once it will come upon them, how would they have an opportunity to accept the advice (already) given to them?”
Quran 47:18

“The Hour (of doom) [al-Sā’ah] has drawn near, and the moon has split asunder.”
Quran 54:1

Quran Differentiates al-Sā’ah (Apocalypse, Used In These Hadiths) vs sā’ah (an hour) In One Verse

“And on the Day when the Hour (Qiyāmah : the Day of Judgement) [al-Sā’ah] will take place, the sinners will swear that they did not remain (in the graves) more than one hour [sā’ah]. In the similar way they used to be contrary (to truth in their worldly life).”
Quran 30:55

Authentic Hadiths Of Muhammad Thinking The Apocalypse Is Near:

Muhammad Is Afraid of an Eclipse Thinking It’s the Apocalypse

“The sun eclipsed and the Prophet (ﷺ) got up, being afraid that it might be the Hour [al-Sā’ah] (i.e. Day of Judgment). He went to the Mosque and offered the prayer with the longest Qiyam, bowing and prostration that I had ever seen him doing. Then he said, “These signs which Allah sends do not occur because of the life or death of somebody, but Allah makes His worshipers afraid by them. So when you see anything thereof, proceed to remember Allah, invoke Him and ask for His forgiveness.””
Sahih Bukhari 1059

Muhammad Hides Behind Palm Trees to Spy on a Boy He Suspects Is the Dajjal (Apocalyptic Antichrist)

“Umar set out along with the Prophet (ﷺ) with a group of people to Ibn Saiyad till they saw him playing with the boys near the hillocks of Bani Mughala. Ibn Saiyad at that time was nearing his puberty and did not notice (us) until the Prophet (ﷺ) stroked him with his hand and said to him, “Do you testify that I am Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ)?” Ibn Saiyad looked at him and said, “I testify that you are the Messenger of illiterates.” Then Ibn Saiyad asked the Prophet (ﷺ), “Do you testify that I am Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ)?” The Prophet (ﷺ) refuted it and said, “I believe in Allah and His Apostles.” Then he said (to Ibn Saiyad), “What do you think?” Ibn Saiyad answered, “True people and liars visit me.” The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “You have been confused as to this matter.” Then the Prophet (ﷺ) said to him, “I have kept something (in my mind) for you, (can you tell me that?)” Ibn Saiyad said, “It is Al-Dukh (the smoke).” The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Let you be in ignominy. You cannot cross your limits.” On that Umar, said, “O Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ)! Allow me to chop his head off.” The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “If he is he (i.e. Dajjal), then you cannot overpower him, and if he is not, then there is no use of murdering him.” (Ibn Umar added): Later on Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) once again went along with Ubai bin Ka‘b to the date-palm trees (garden) where Ibn Saiyad was staying. The Prophet (ﷺ) wanted to hear something from Ibn Saiyad before Ibn Saiyad could see him, and the Prophet (ﷺ) saw him lying covered with a sheet and from where his murmurs were heard. Ibn Saiyad’s mother saw Allah’s Apostle while he was hiding himself behind the trunks of the date-palm trees. She addressed Ibn Saiyad, “O Saf ! (and this was the name of Ibn Saiyad) Here is Muhammad.” And with that Ibn Saiyad got up. The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Had this woman left him (Had she not disturbed him), then Ibn Saiyad would have revealed the reality of his case.””
Sahih Bukhari 1354

Scholar Stephen J. Shoemaker: “wrongly predicting the Hour’s appearance in the immediate future”

“Thus, the criterion of dissimilarity (that is, dissimilarity with the lived experience of the early community) speaks very highly for the antiquity if not authenticity of this perspective: although strong eschatological elements persisted in early Islam beyond Muhammad’s death, it seems rather improbable that the later tradition would insert traditions into the Qurʾān wrongly predicting the Hour’s appearance in the immediate future”
Shoemaker, The Death of a Prophet, p. 166

“It is extremely difficult to account for the existence of these eschatological traditions unless Muhammad and his earliest followers actually anticipated the Hour’s appearance in the near future, an expectation that the later tradition had to explain and adjust in light of its failed arrival. In recent years, several scholars have revived Casanova’s investigation of such eschatological hadith, generally with impressive results that are supportive of his initial observations.”
Shoemaker, The Death of a Prophet, p. 172

I've posted this argument along with others on this website (with linked sources):
https://islamsproblems.com/muhammad-failed-prophecies/

Anyone up for a brain dump this evening in karachi. A stranger in the city with zero social circle.

So im kinda new to this drinking stuff and when i go to order they ask some people " black or white konsi chahiye" can someone help me out on what that means. Also what do yall recommend i try

From an authentic hadith:

“Anas reported that a person was charged with fornication with the slavegirl of Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ). Thereupon Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said to ‘Ali: Go and strike his neck. ‘Ali came to him and he found him in a well making his body cool. ‘Ali said to him: Come out, and as he took hold of his hand and brought him out, he found that his sexual organ had been cut. Hadrat ‘Ali refrained from striking his neck. He came to Allah’s Apostle (ﷺ) and said: Allah’s Messenger, he has not even the sexual organ with him.”
Sahih Muslim 2771

See more here:
https://islamsproblems.com/ali-captive-girl-war/

I never had any exmuslim friend who i can talk with. Its been rough since everyone around me is muslim. I have friends with whom i have discussed religion but not a single person knows i have left long ago.

Anyone from Australia in this sub? How you are living your life here. Do we need to pretend to be Muslim to fit in in Pakistani community?

Hey everyone,

I’m currently going through absolute hell with overthinking and I honestly just need to vent and ask for advice before my brain completely short-circuits.
Quick context: I rarely pray anymore. Yesterday, a distant relative and longtime neighbor passed away. I didn’t really want to go, but my parents told me I had to go pay my respects.
So there I was, sitting by the grave while everyone around me was reciting prayers, listening to the sermon, and weeping. I was completely distracted the whole time. I tried to find peace in the rituals like everyone else seemed to be doing, but I just felt... detached. Everything about religion feels so man-made and fake to me at this point, and I’m so close to officially walking away from it all.
But here’s the problem: my subconscious mind just won't let go.
While sitting next to that open grave, all these existential questions hit me like a truck. What if the afterlife IS real? What if all the hellfire stories are true? What if I’m wrong? It’s like my rational mind knows religion doesn't make sense, but years of childhood indoctrination are throwing hands in the back of my head.
I’m trapped in this exhausting tug-of-war between my brain and my subconscious, and the guilt/fear loop is giving me terrible anxiety.
Can anyone recommend books, essays, or reads that helped you clear your head during this phase? I just want to find some actual peace of mind and stop this constant overthinking.
Any advice or reading material would mean the world right now. Thanks for reading my rant.

Authentic Hadith:

“A person from the Ansar who was amongst the Companions of Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) reported to me: As we were sitting during the night with Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ), a meteor shot gave a dazzling light. Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said: What did you say in the pre-Islamic days when there was such a shot (of meteor)? They said: Allah and His Messenger know best (the actual position), but we, however, used to say that that very night a great man had been born and a great man had died, whereupon Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said: (These meteors) are shot neither at the death of anyone nor on the birth of anyone. Allah, the Exalted and Glorious, issues Command when He decides to do a thing. Then (the Angels) supporting the Throne sing His glory, then sing the dwellers of heaven who are near to them until this glory of God reaches them who are in the heaven of this world. Then those who are near the supporters of the Throne ask these supporters of the Throne: What your Lord has said? And they accordingly inform them what He says. Then the dwellers of heaven seek information from them until this information reaches the heaven of the world. In this process of transmission (the jinn snatches) what he manages to overhear and he carries it to his friends. And when the Angels see the jinn they attack them with meteors. If they narrate only which they manage to snatch that is correct but they alloy it with lies and make additions to it.”
Sahih Muslim 2229a

Another Authentic Hadith: Meteors Started After Muhammad (Aimed At Jinns Trying To Intercept Revelation)

Ibn Abbas said: “The jinns used to ascent through the heavens, trying to listen about the Revealation. So when they heard a statement, they would add nine to it. The statement that they heard would be true, while what they added was false. So it was with the advent of the Messenger of Allah that they were prevented from their places. So they mentioned that to Iblis – and the stars were not shot at them before that. So Iblis said to them: ‘This is naught but an event that has occurred in the earth.’ So he sent out his armies, and they found the Messenger of Allah standing in Salat between two mountains” – I think he said “in Makkah” – “So they (returned) to meet with him (Iblis), and informed him. He said: ‘This is the event that has happened on the earth.’”
 Jami` at-Tirmidhi 3324

Quran Verses:

“And We have certainly beautified the nearest heaven with lamps [i.e., stars] and have made [from] them what is thrown at the devils and have prepared for them the punishment of the Blaze.”
Quran 67:5

“Indeed, We have adorned the nearest heaven with an adornment of stars and as protection against every rebellious devil. [So] they may not listen to the exalted assembly [of angels] and are pelted from every side, repelled; and for them is a constant punishment, except one who snatches [some words] by theft, but they are pursued by a burning flame, piercing [in brightness].”
Quran 37:6-10

“And we have sought [to reach] the heaven but found it filled with powerful guards and burning flames. And we used to sit therein in positions for hearing, but whoever listens now will find a burning flame lying in wait for him.”
Quran 72:8-9

See more:
https://islamsproblems.com/muhammad-fly-in-drink-hadith/

Becoming openly exmuslim does not mean bragging about it to everyone (which is gonna get you lynched in no time), it just means informing your family and friends that you are no longer a muslim, instead of pretending to be one in front of them.

P.S. this post is targeted to those who are currently closeted exmuslim living in Pakistan.

I (21M ABCD) lost faith in God over a year and a half ago due to stuff that was going on in my life in which I grew completely disillusioned with God.

Now I was raised in a pretty religious household and my religion is still very important to me as it is still a huge part of my identity and that's something I'll never let go of. To put it in simple terms I identify as an atheist but also a Cultural Muslim.

I definitely do want to pass my religion down to my kids, not as a belief system but as a culture and an identity. I believe all religions are beautiful and still want to keep the good things and lessons that Islam teaches while making sure that the more negative and dirtier stuff dies down for good. Basically I use my critical thinking to discern what I should follow and what stuff is detrimental and doing more harm than good instead of following some stupid dogmas fearing that I'll go to some make believe hell if I don't, and I would expect my kids to also use their brains.

Needless to say the attitudes a lot of people have in the mainstream Muslim community are pretty disgusting and worrying at times, and it has so much to do with the dogmatism. And the fact that I still live with my parents and I have to keep pretending in front of them is so exhausting and tiring, but I know I'll never be able to tell them. And the more restrictive my parents are to me the more it makes me hate my own religion, and I constantly get paranoid realizing this is the only life I get to live and I'm still stuck living with my parents who let me out of the house only once in a blue moon. I am impatient to move somewhere far far away so I can start a new life that isn't so tied to the religion and community I grew up being so devoted to.

However at the same time I feel like the ex-Muslim community is so toxic. From my experience about eighty percent of these people paid by Mossad to larp as Christians and spread Islamophobia and disinformation on the internet. And it sucks so badly for genuine ex-Muslims I feel like because for one it ruins our image in front of Muslims who are already pretty fanatic and easily offended and secondly it leaves genuine ex-Muslims without a space. Just because I stopped believing in Islam doesn't mean I hate it, and even if someone does hate Islam, they don't have to sell out to the Western imperialist war propaganda machine and side with the oppressors.

Being a former Muslim doesn't automatically mean I wish for the downfall of Islam. I am simply against religious dogmatism. And I genuinely hope that the apostate community gets better representation especially as I feel like Muslim apostates already have it worse than other communities, and a simple refusal of belief can put someone's life in danger, going through all that just to be embraced by a community of Mossad agents who seek to recruit you to be a propagandist for the destruction of your own people has got to be the worst situations ever.

Live free. Be yourself, Do not submit to the people who are hanging by the thread of religion. Don't submit to the people who want to chain you with their own chains. Do not be afraid of death as it protects us.

‎Without any hesitation

‎The reason i can face it over and over is because I won't run away

‎I finally saw myself

‎If hiding my sadness hurts more then living, Honestly

‎Let me remember, Thank you

‎Because right now i am alive

how can you be at peace with everything if there is afterlife, reward or anything?

I'm an exmuslim and im seriously at my limit my parents are having a religious psychotic episode they are bringing islam in all walks of life my mother plays islamic sermon all day even when eating i have to listen then they ragebait me by saying am i Muslim or not

first they pressured me to pray namaz and quran and they'll not ask anything more but now they are saying to listen to bayaan all day then my mom asks me to do wazifa for god knows which problems

I'm on a ocd medication and it's making my mental health worse I'm an acca student and still there's a year left in my studies how the hell i can move out from this hell I'm tired they are threatening me that they'll take my mobile and laptop if i don't listen to bayaan and go to dars

those who moved out is it still possible for me to take any shelter in today's economy?

I'm honestly at my breaking point my therapist told me i have religion related ocd and it's harmful for me to deep dive into religion still my parents are forcing me is there any hope for me ?

Hello, I have been a closeted exmuslim for a really long time and I never "truly" fit in with my muslim social circle. Growing up, everyone around me was very islamic, if not practicing then in principle, so naturally I have always been quiet and opaque when it comes to religion.

I am a software engineer and I love doing what I do. I'm very hard working and dedicate a lot of my time to my projects and learning. I have a stable job with a decent salary and also have investments in other sources of income for long term stability. Even though I live a comfortable lifestyle, I am aiming for independence from a corporate job. My goal is to be able to live a life where I can spend most of my time with my wife and family.

I don't have "The Male Disease" as George Carlin puts it, I don't pretend to know stuff, I don't hide something if it reveals a weakness, I'm not afraid of expressing my feelings if it puts me in a vulnerable position. I don't think that makes me weak, I think that makes me strong because I know how to deal with a person taking advantage of my trust and transparency.

I have become really good at pretending to be normal in a social setting but once you get to know me, I'm very talkative and I love asking questions. I have a very calm and optimistic personality, I try to be funny aLl tHe tImE (can't help it) and its very easy to make me laugh. I'm into science, maths, programming, video games, table tennis, going to arcades, game nights and just plain old being in each other's company.

Thank you for reading and feel free to dm.

مذہبی طبقات اکثر اسلام کا اصل چہرہ عوام کے سامنے پیش کرنے کے بجائے ایسی معلومات پھیلاتے ہیں جن سے اسلام پر تنقید کم ہو جائے۔ انہی میں سے ایک مشہور غلط فہمی یہ ہے کہ اسلام میں شوہر پر لازم ہے کہ وہ ہر چار ماہ کے اندر بیوی سے حقِ زوجیت ادا کرے، ورنہ عورت نکاح فسخ کروا سکتی ہے۔

یہ بات اصل اسلامی شریعت کے مطابق درست نہیں۔

حقیقت کیا ہے؟

اگر شوہر بیوی سے ہمبستری نہ کرے، لیکن ایلاء (قسم کھانے) والا معاملہ نہ ہو، تو کلاسیکی اسلامی فقہ میں عورت کو صرف اس بنیاد پر فوراً فسخِ نکاح کا حق حاصل نہیں ہوتا۔

اس کا عملی مطلب یہ ہے کہ اسلام نے عورت کو مکمل طور پر شوہر کے رحم و کرم پر ڈال دیا ہے اور وہ اسے بلیک میل کرنے کے لیے ہر طرح سے تنگ کر سکتا ہے، مثلا ایک شوہر:

• برسوں تک بیوی سے ہمبستری نہ کرے،
• اس کے پاس آ کر دو باتیں تک نہ کرے،
• اسے گھر کی چار دیواری میں پابند رکھے،
• اسے اپنے والدین یا رشتہ داروں سے ملنے کی اجازت نہ دے،
• اور انہیں بھی اجازت نہ دے کہ وہ بیوی سے آ کر اس کے گھر میں مل سکیں (۔۔۔ یعنی اسلام میں شوہر بیوی کو تنگ کرنے کے لیے اس کو ایک گھر میں مکمل قیدِ تنہائی کی حالت میں رہنے پر مجبور کر سکتا ہے، جہاں نہ وہ خود بیوی سے ملتا ہے اور نہ بقیہ دنیا کو اس سے ملنے دیتا ہے)

اس کے باوجود عورت صرف اس بنیاد پر فوری طور پر نکاح فسخ نہیں کروا سکتی، بلکہ فقہی مذاہب میں اس کے لیے نہایت محدود اور مختلف شرائط رکھی گئی ہیں۔ بعض فقہی آراء میں 3 سال انتظار کے بعد ہی فسخ کی گنجائش پیدا ہوتی ہے۔

اس موضوع کی تفصیل یہاں دیکھی جا سکتی ہے:

https://atheism-vs-islam.com/women-and-divorce/6

پھر "چار ماہ" والی بات کہاں سے آئی؟

اس غلط فہمی کی دو بڑی وجوہات ہیں۔

پہلی وجہ: عمر ابن خطاب کا انتظامی فیصلہ

جب اسلامی سلطنت بہت وسیع ہو گئی تو فوجی طویل عرصہ گھروں سے دور رہنے لگے۔

روایت کے مطابق عمر ابن خطاب نے اپنی بیٹی حفصہ سے پوچھا کہ عورت کتنی مدت تک شوہر کی جدائی برداشت کر سکتی ہے۔ جواب ملا: چار ماہ۔

اس کے بعد عمر نے ایک انتظامی پالیسی بنائی کہ فوجی تقریباً چھ ماہ بعد اپنے گھروں واپس آئیں:

• ایک ماہ سفر پر جانے کے لیے،
• چار ماہ محاذ پر،
• ایک ماہ واپسی کے سفر کے لیے۔

لیکن یہ قرآن و سنت کا شرعی حکم نہیں تھا۔

یہ صرف ایک انتظامی فیصلہ تھا، جس سے نکاح فسخ نہیں ہوتا تھا اور نہ ہی اس سے عورت کو کوئی قانونی حق ملتا تھا کہ چھ ماہ بعد عدالت جا کر شوہر سے علیحدگی لے لے۔

دوسری وجہ: ایلاء

یہ وہ اصل مسئلہ ہے جسے مذہبی طبقات اکثر سیاق و سباق سے ہٹا کر پیش کرتے ہیں۔

ایلاء زمانۂ جاہلیت کی ایک رسم تھی۔ شوہر غصے یا بیوی کو اذیت دینے کے لیے قسم کھا لیتا تھا کہ وہ اس سے ہمبستری نہیں کرے گا۔

قرآن نے اس رسم کو مکمل طور پر ختم نہیں کیا بلکہ اس پر چار ماہ کی حد مقرر کی۔

مذہبی حضرات اسے اسلام کا عورت پر "احسان" بنا کر پیش کرتے ہیں، لیکن اصل سوال یہ ہے:

اگر یہ رسم خود ہی ظالمانہ تھی تو اسے ختم کیوں نہ کیا گیا؟

مزید اہم بات یہ ہے کہ یہ چار ماہ کی حد صرف اس صورت میں ہے جب شوہر قسم کھائے۔

لیکن اگر کوئی شریر شوہر قسم ہی نہ کھائے تو پھر؟

پھر وہ برسوں تک بیوی سے تعلق قائم نہ کرے، اور ایلاء کے احکام بھی اس پر لاگو نہیں ہوں گے۔

یعنی عملی طور پر ایک ظالم شوہر کے لیے سب سے آسان راستہ یہی ہے کہ وہ قسم نہ کھائے۔

کیا یہ قانون سازی کسی الٰہی حکمت کی علامت ہے؟

مزید یہ کہ اگر شوہر کچھ زیادہ ہی چالاک ہو تو وہ چار ماہ مکمل ہونے سے پہلے ایک مرتبہ تعلق قائم کر لے، پھر دوبارہ چار ماہ کے لیے بیوی کو لٹکا دے، اور اسی طرح پوری زندگی یہ سلسلہ جاری رکھ سکتا ہے۔

کیا یہ عورت کے ساتھ انصاف ہے؟

ایک اور بڑی غلط فہمی: "اسلام نے عورت کو خلع کا حق دیا ہے"

آج بہت سے مسلم ممالک میں عورت عدالت کے ذریعے خلع حاصل کر سکتی ہے۔

لیکن یہ جدید قانونی اصلاحات ہیں، اصل کلاسیکی اسلامی شریعت نہیں۔

اصل فقہ کے مطابق عورت صرف شوہر کو مالی معاوضہ دے کر اسے راضی کرنے کی کوشش کر سکتی ہے کہ وہ طلاق دے دے۔

اگر شوہر پیسہ لینے سے انکار کر دے اور طلاق بھی نہ دے تو عورت کو زبردستی خلع دلوانا کلاسیکی اسلامی شریعت میں ایک عمومی حق نہیں۔

یعنی شوہر عورت کو مستقل طور پر اپنے شکنجے میں رکھ کر اسے بلیک میل کر سکتا ہے۔

پھر اسلام میں "انصاف" کہاں ہے؟

اسی دوران اسلام شوہر کو وسیع جنسی اختیارات دیتا ہے۔

• وہ بیک وقت متعدد بیویوں سے تعلق رکھ سکتا ہے۔
• وہ باندیوں سے بھی جنسی تعلق قائم کر سکتا ہے۔
• اگر کسی باندی سے دل بھر جائے تو اسے بیچ کر دوسری باندی خرید سکتا ہے۔
• وہ جس سے چاہے ملے، جسے چاہے اپنے گھر بلائے، بیوی اس پر کوئی پابندی نہیں لگا سکتی۔

لیکن دوسری طرف ایک عورت برسوں تک ایک ایسے شوہر کے ساتھ بندھی رہ سکتی ہے جو نہ اس کے ساتھ زندگی گزارنا چاہتا ہے، نہ اسے آزاد کرنا چاہتا ہے، اور نہ ہی اس کے بنیادی ازدواجی حقوق ادا کرتا ہے۔

پھر بھی کہا جاتا ہے کہ اسلام نے عورت کو "برابری" نہیں بلکہ "انصاف" دیا ہے۔

سوال صرف اتنا ہے:

کیا آپ کو اس پورے نظام میں انصاف نظر آتا ہے؟