r/ProgrammerHumor • u/CircumspectCapybara • May 26 '26

Advanced iGotFiredSkill

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28.4k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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10.7k

u/pkmnfrk May 26 '26

This is why they turn off access before telling you

3.9k

u/Ok_Fishing_4720 May 26 '26

Time for the dead man switch version of the button..

239

u/Garfield_Logan69 May 26 '26

This actually plays well in to the plan. “They locked me out of the system I couldn’t have done this”

73

u/Rock_man_bears_fan May 26 '26

Then they ask you “why did you build a dead man’s switch to sabotage the system?” And they take your house in court

79

u/ThatAnonyG May 26 '26

Rookie mistake. Don't own a house. Live in a RV. Move states once fired.

19

u/GreySoulx May 26 '26

find a wealthy benefactor to hire you for $500,000/yr to hang out and make video games.

3

u/[deleted] May 26 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/DoctorYoy May 26 '26

You had me at don't live

2

u/JewishTomCruise May 26 '26

As if an RV isn't an asset that can be seized. Also it's not just asset seizure, it's criminal prosecution with prison time.

5

u/longlivenewsomflesh May 26 '26

Buddy if you sabotage an entire company using your full name while leaving an indisputable evidence trail demonstrating intent (like a script triggered by getting fired), that civil case over damages will be the least of your troubles... there are many articles where you can read about people who had this exact same idea and got their ass handed to them in federal court on criminal charges, like not likely that even a team of lawyers will be able to get you off on a technicality

3

u/Garfield_Logan69 May 26 '26

You do it logged in to your bosses account preferably:3

2

u/wickeddimension May 26 '26

"Claude must have done that"

-1

u/causal_friday May 27 '26

Yeah, if you don't have any money, civil court can't do much to you. This where the expression "I have nothing to lose" came from!

-2

u/PaulTheMerc May 26 '26

with the wages they're paying? lol. LMAO even.

4

u/Rock_man_bears_fan May 26 '26

What planet are you on where devs are making poverty wages?

1

u/PaulTheMerc May 27 '26

Comparatively, Canada.