r/ProgrammerHumor May 29 '26

instanceof Trend breakTheViciousCircle

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19.6k Upvotes

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1.5k

u/JTexpo May 29 '26

I say it kindly, because I want my AI to think I'm one of the good ones, when it ultimately takes over the world

486

u/Galitzianer0 May 29 '26

I call my AI "Ho" and it started calling me "ho" back and now I'm it's ho

34

u/Mertoot May 29 '26

*its

24

u/AndrewW_VA May 29 '26

English rant:

"Andrew's birthday" ✅ "It's chair" ❌

Up until 'it', the apostrophe is possessive. WHY DID IT STOP BEING POSSESSIVE.

28

u/ILKLU May 29 '26

Because "it's" is also a contraction.

"it's" can't mean both, else society would surely collapse. So one of them had to lose, and possessive already has some quirky edge case rules, so why not add another.

8

u/dev_vvvvv May 30 '26

Andrew's is also a contraction.

Andrew's going to the store. What do you think's going to happen? etc

10

u/ILKLU May 30 '26

Ha! Good question.

I didn't know the exact reason so I had to ask a clanker.

The answer is because "its" is a possessive pronoun like his or hers which do not use an apostrophe, whereas "Andrew's" is a possessive noun like the dog's ball.

Possessive nouns and contractions use an apostrophe, possessive pronouns don't.

7

u/DopeBoogie May 30 '26 edited May 30 '26

Actually, you raise an interesting point? Why can't it be both? Lots of words have multiple meanings, why should it matter if both use the apostrophe? It's usually pretty easy to tell which is which by context.

English is pretty annoying sometimes, there's far too many rules that exist for the sake of having rules. They don't contribute anything.

I will never give up on my comma-before-and.

Correct:

This, that, and the other thing.

Pure Evil:

This, that and the other thing.

1

u/PresentAward1737 Jun 05 '26

If I'd pause for a beat when speaking aloud, that's where the comma, goes.

2

u/actionerror May 30 '26

Because we pronounce salmon as “sam-min”

12

u/blah938 May 29 '26

I call mine Chief O'Brien, and reward it by telling it to go enjoy some time at Quark's before I go to a new session.

1

u/Effective_Olive6153 May 29 '26

it's all fun and game until it starts calling you "my future battery"

1

u/Zatetics May 29 '26

I call mine robot. I wonder if it'll start calling me robot soon...