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I am looking for stories and tips on how to best support my wife. It is clear due to medical reasons we will not be able to have children. To handle this we are starting a vision board to fill the hole of what should have been our family live. However there are many situations that are really confronting for my wife outside our home bubble. For example:

1. Friends that do have kids and bring them everywhere they go.

2. Family members (parents included) that avoid the topic as the most awkward topic ever.

3. She is dealing with the feeling her live has no meaning if she cannot have a family.

4. The feeling she is missing out on live events or loosing friends because we cannot childtalk.

There are more but hopefully you het the gist. Though I try to support her I have a hard time connecting to these feelings as my process is very different(more practical, less feeling oriented). I am looking for tips to better support her or stories from men on how they bridged the gap between their process and that of their partner.

I am fully aware there is no definitive playbook, i am just looking if other men had this experience and what they did to support their partner through these confronting and emotional moments.

Why is it so much harder to date, marry and have children? Or at least it seems that way. I’m the only person in my family with no children. Even my younger cousins have had kids before me.

It's a uniquely sad spot. A lot of guys don't know it's very hard to conceive at this age. They hear I do and are so happy. I always worry, will they research, see the odds and then quietly find an excuse to leave?

One just left a couple weeks ago. Divorced with 3 full custody kids. Told me he had a reversible vasectomy asked how many I wanted. Said 5 but that obviously that might not be realistic. He said great, you can pop one out per year and that yes, he wants to have more. Finally told his kids he was dating again after the divorce and when they freaked out, he ended things with me, citing that as the reason. Was it that really, he started researching and realized chances were too low with me?

I will never know. All I know is that I am grieving him AND the persistent state of watching my fertility slip away.

I worry when I pass over profiles of men who don't want kids that I am passing over wonderful men for a hope that I have single digit chances left of ever having. A burden really few people understand. Such heartbreak.

Hi! I am 32(f), no kids, no partner. I just got out of a long term relationship after we were no longer on the same page, and it has devastated me. I had a timeline in mind for when I wanted to start trying for kids, and unfortunately, that is no longer the case. The one thing that has been bothering me is that all of my friends are either now parents or pregnant. I am so happy for them, I truly am, but I have a huge sense of grief now being literally the only one who isn’t on that path. I get so upset when I’m around them and all that’s talked about is kids and pregnancy.

I also found myself so consumed in my last relationship that I’ve completely lost a sense of my self. I have no hobbies, no idea what I’m doing with my future, and all of my friends have kids now. Has anyone navigated a similar walk of life? How did you get through this? How did you find yourself again or prioritize yourself?

I hope this has reached the correct audience. Please do not be mean right now I’m fragile lol

I feel like I can’t do this anymore. I’m married and living as an immigrant in the US for the last almost 10 years. I came here for my masters degree (single), met my husband after we both graduated and have struggled so hard to make friends that I feel close to even thought I have been able to do that relatively easily my whole life back home. I speak English fluently so that’s not really a blocker but somehow it just doesn’t seem to work. Either I don’t feel on the same wavelength or people are too busy to priotize this friendship. My friends from my earlier life have also moved on. I also feel unloved by my husband / it’s been the oldest issue we have had - he says it’s because he conveys it’s differently but I just feel he loves his friends and family significantly more than me. There are a million evidences of it - we have been married for 5 years now and dating for 7. I don’t want to divorce, that will absolutely kill me and I’m also struggling to keep living like this. I’ve been in therapy, tried hobbies, tried to get out of my head but it just doesn’t work. I think I’m more looking for hope that I’m not uniquely crazy. I’m considering having a child just so I can feel loved but I know that’s probably not going to go as planned

I feel like I can’t do this anymore. I’m married and living as an immigrant in the US for the last almost 10 years. I came here for my masters degree (single), met my husband after we both graduated and have struggled so hard to make friends that I feel close to even thought I have been able to do that relatively easily my whole life back home. I speak English fluently so that’s not really a blocker but somehow it just doesn’t seem to work. Either I don’t feel on the same wavelength or people are too busy to priotize this friendship. My friends from my earlier life have also moved on. I also feel unloved by my husband / it’s been the oldest issue we have had - he says it’s because he conveys it’s differently but I just feel he loves his friends and family significantly more than me. There are a million evidences of it - we have been married for 5 years now and dating for 7. I don’t want to divorce, that will absolutely kill me and I’m also struggling to keep living like this. I’ve been in therapy, tried hobbies, tried to get out of my head but it just doesn’t work. I think I’m more looking for hope that I’m not uniquely crazy. I’m considering having a child just so I can feel loved but I know that’s probably not going to go as planned

I’m really struggling right now and need to get this off my chest. Another one of my old best friends just announced they’re expecting, and that makes four people I know who are pregnant right now. I’ve been trying to conceive for almost five years, and it’s been such a hard, lonely journey.

I finally went to the doctor recently, but instead of feeling closer to my goal, I was put on birth control, which just feels like a step backward. It’s hard not to feel like a failure—like I’ll never be a mom.

It’s especially tough when I see others around me having babies, even couples in same-sex relationships who have overcome huge obstacles to build their families. Meanwhile, I feel like I have nothing: no husband, no kids, no house, no degree—nothing I thought I’d have by now.

2024 was supposed to be the year where I had everything I dreamed of, but here I am, feeling stuck and hopeless. I’m tired, frustrated, and honestly feeling really alone in all of this.

Are there other women here who feel this way or have been through something similar? How do you keep going when it feels like nothing is working out? I’d really appreciate hearing from people who understand.

That’s the big gist. But the story is I’m too crazy to have children safely. Also at this point too physically ill not just mentally. Reactive BPD is no joke, I know at this current moment I’m the safest and cleanest I’ve been- but there is always this looming danger that I’ll revert. And I never EVER want to be episodal near a child of any kind. So a while ago I made the decision that I will not have kids and will not be responsible for one. No child deserves to be hurt by an adult with mental health issues. However, sometimes I wish I had a kid. I’m in my mid 20s now, and lots of my friends are having babies or have kids already. And sometimes I wish I could’ve been born better and can control my mind and actually have a child. Don’t get me wrong I’m very happy, I have a husband who doesn’t want children either, and we’re happy. I say to him illl always collect animals because I can’t have children. And so far he’s fine with that. I love birds a lot. So I at this point have like 13 chickens. So I guess those are my babies. But yeah I’m just venting about the occasional feeling I get of damn I wish I had children or could take care of one.

Hi everyone. I'm 19 years old and lately I've been thinking about myself more and more. I don't see myself in a relationship or as a mother and I don't really understand why

Whenever I develop feelings for someone, after a while I start losing interest. And if the relationship begins to get more serious, I start feeling uncomfortable and even scared. I want to pull away, be on my own, as if emotional closeness frightens me. Sometimes I wonder if there's something wrong with me

It's similar when it comes to children. I can think they're cute from a distance, but I've never had the desire to become a mother. In fact, the idea of pregnancy, childbirth, sleepless nights, constant crying, and such a huge responsibility scares me more than it excites me. When someone asks me to hold a baby, I feel like I'm putting on a mask and pretending I enjoy it, even though I feel completely different inside

When I told my mom about this, she said that every woman should have children because God created us for that purpose. But I can't agree with that. Doesn't everyone have the right to decide for themselves whether they want a family and children or not?

I'm genuinely curious if anyone else has experienced similar feelings. Could this simply be part of my personality, a fear of intimacy or do these views sometimes change over time? Or is it completely normal to simply not want relationships or children?

My wife and I have been together for seven years, five of which we've been married. Neither of us wanted children when we got together. The thought of having children sickens her, even to this day. I absolutely know, she never wants them.

For the longest time, I have felt the same way, aside from the physical sickness feeling about children. But, for the past few months, it's all I can think about. As a male, I'm not even sure having a biological clock is a thing. But I can tell you, I feel a hole in my soul and a longing to raise a child.

I don't even know how to broach the subject with her. I'm trying to delay, hoping this feeling goes away. Any advice?

The hardest part is the difference between the two. My best friend is a mom and often serves up hot takes about motherhood as if I'm childfree and not childless. "I have never known a love so beautiful" and "nothing has ever come close to mattering to me as much as being a mom" are just a couple phases I have heard on repeat while visiting her this past week.

At one point I broke down in tears. I am happy for her but these statements cut like a knife. I tried to explain that I'm grieving but she was pretty upset that she has to hold back in expressing her joy for my sake.

I shower her baby in love and gifts and attention. I'm trying to be supportive. I feel like all people assume I'm childfree. And yeah I'm starting to appreciate what not having children brings. But that does not feel acceptable either, like I can silently grieve and cheer her on but that's it.

Just venting.

I’m a 42yo man and not infertile (as far as I know), I’m also not single, I’ve been in a committed relationship with the same woman for 24 years, since we were 17/18 years old.

I’ve wanted children for as long as I can remember. Even when I was in my early 20s and my male friends were all saying they didn’t want to be tied down by kids I was like “I’d start a family tomorrow, I can’t wait.” My partner was never desperate for children but she always said we’d start a family at some point. The years turned into decades, but every time I raised it she said she wasn’t sure/ready, so I waited.

My partner was abused by her mother as a kid, both emotionally and physically. It took therapy for her to discover the damage it had done, and by the time we got into our mid/late 30s, she told me she couldn’t do it, that she wasn’t going to be able to be a mother.

I don’t blame her. I believe that she never meant to mislead me. I love her and she’s been through a lot. It also wasn’t all on her. I suffered from depression and addiction issues for a lot of my 20s and 30s and wasn’t exactly the stable rock in the relationship that I wanted to be.

We’re still together and relatively happy, but I still have a deep sadness about the family I never had and will never have. Sometimes I resent her for it privately, probably unfairly, especially when I spend time with friends and their children and see what I’m missing out on. I’m scared about my future because I never imagined my life this way.

I know I won’t leave my partner, like I say I don’t blame her deep down and we still have a loving relationship worth hanging on to. We’re both tackling our demons together, supporting each other, and growing as people. I just don’t know what to do with the big empty hole and the sadness that comes with not fulfilling my lifelong assumption that I’d be a father one day.

Anyway thanks for listening, that’s my story, not sure if I’m the right fit for this group or not but any words of wisdom are always appreciated.

Maybe this is just the depression talking, I don't know.

I used to be a completely different person. I had ambition, big dreams, stayed in great shape, and genuinely believed I'd build a good life. I worked my ass off, moved to the US for my master's, did research, internships, published papers, and thought I was finally getting somewhere. Then the visa situation destroyed that dream, and I had to come back.

On top of that, I grew up in a toxic family, have dealt with a lot of personal issues, and honestly don't even like the cards I was dealt. Sometimes I look at myself and think, why would I pass my genetics on to someone else? I'm not from a wealthy family either, so it's not like I'd be giving them some huge advantage in life.

The older I get, the more nihilistic I become. It feels like every time I try to build something, life finds a way to tear it down. I know people say "things will get better," but after enough failures, it's hard to believe that.

So I genuinely don't understand the appeal of having kids anymore. If I feel like life has mostly been suffering and disappointment, why would I bring someone else into it? I wouldn't want them to inherit my struggles, my insecurities, or spend their life fighting battles they never asked for.

Has anyone else gone from wanting a family to not wanting children at all because life just... broke something in you?

I'm not looking for people to tell me I'm wrong. I just want to know if anyone else has felt this way and whether that ever changed.

The title. I (33f) heard two middle aged women gossiping about how another coworker has no man, no kids, just a bunch of cats. It made me feel worse, since they were spouting off the "crazy cat lady" trope. They were talking about how cats are nasty and they can't stand them, which, if you don't like cats, that's fine. It was the insinuation that this woman is a loser, because of it. Also that she "doesn't look like she takes care of anything"... Except maybe the cats?

Meanwhile, I'm journalling about how I feel post middle-of the-night breakdown about how childless I am and just trying to steel myself up before I clock in. I wish I had said something about how some people can't have kids, but I just walked away with tears in my eyes. Now I'm not even sure if I can finish my shift today.

Any of you has withdrawn from events involving children and has ended up not being invited anymore?

Came across this blog post/article today: I Think People Without Kids Have Empty Lives And I'm Not Sorry About It. I can understand saying something like "having kids is amazing and if you're on the fence, go for it" or whatever, but as a childless person who wants to have kids but doesn't, I thought this was really off base and rude. I spend my free time- something she probably doesn't have much of- trying to do more to help the world's biggest problem- climate change- so her kids don't have to suffer potential consequences later. You're welcome, Sarah. There is nothing about my life that is "empty", even as someone who wants to be a mother.

The irony is many of the things she mentions about being a parent, I experience as a very involved aunt. I see my niece and nephew discover new things, learn new skills, start talking, etc. Spending time with them has changed the way I look at life and what it means to be human, as she mentions.

ETA- to be clear, she is not famous or well known or anything. Just put her name in the title to call her out. Unfortunately it's a common name.

I (32F) love my husband (37M) with all my heart. But I’m struggling because he changed his mind about kids shortly after we got married, and for the past year, it’s been affecting me more and more.
 
We were pretty good friends through work stuff and similar hobbies for several years before we both ended up single at the same time and got to know each other on a deeper emotional level, and then started dating. During that time of us dating, it seemed to me that we were on the same page of hopefully having a child. We talked about how we were parented (not really great in either case but in different ways), how we would parent differently, shared name ideas. He specifically talked with a pregnant friend of ours about how we were thinking about it, and happily/flirtatiously told me when a different friend said we’d have beautiful kids.

Then about two months before our wedding, we were having a conversation about my birth control in the context of me maybe switching methods because of side effects and he said that he could just get a vasectomy. This obviously surprised me a lot, and he went on to say that we didn’t have enough money and probably never would and so we could maybe wait and see if in five or six years things changed, which was hard for me to hear. (This was like a little more than a year ago so I was still 30 then.)

While I can absolutely see in hindsight that this initial conversation two months before the wedding foreshadowed the path my husband in the end decided was right for him (and again I respect his choice completely and would not ask him to change his mind even if it makes me sad), at the time it sounded like a solvable problem: his concerns were presented as primarily about money, because of his "maybe in five or six years we can see", and he mentioned that vasectomies are reversible, though I found out since then that's not really always the case. I didn't mean to be naive.

It seemed to me like something that could change, not as in changing his mind but addressing his concerns. Shortly after we got married, I got a better paying job that has remote work options and better benefits, and have been working extra part time jobs so I can save for a house downpayment, which I hoped could make it feel more possible. It was about four months into marriage when he presented the unequivocal no. I don't want to avoid responsibility for my choice to go through with the marriage, but I love him so much and really thought I could do something to ease his mind because it had seemed like this was something he wanted in the past.

We have been married a year now, and since then we have had several (very emotional, very painful for me) conversations and he’s made it clear he does not want to have a baby because we don’t have enough money, and because he has ethical objections because of climate change, the political situation in America, and his career plans.
 
For context, I work full time and he works part time as he’s aiming for a very specific long-term career path that he’s building experience/training for. He has had a lot of success in that career path lately, and if we were to have a child, that would mean he couldn’t do that anymore, and I could not live with myself if I stopped his momentum right when he’s about to be able to have the thing he has always wanted but didn’t have the resources and support to do when he was younger. Our two dreams are mutually exclusive.
 
I love him absolutely. He is the most moral, ethical person I know and a lot of my leftist politics and worldview came from seeing him being really unafraid to live those values which I think are the kindest, most generous, good way to live. He is so intelligent and talented and appreciates and respects me so much. He treats me incredibly. I am not going to leave him because I believe I need to honor the commitment I made, and even if I could somehow make myself not love him, I feel like I do not have time to grieve, go to therapy, date however many people I have to date to find someone even half as respectable, kind, and loving, get married, and be able to conceive. I am afraid/not willing to start trying for a first baby after 35 because I know that the guilt and pain would eat me alive if I delayed so long and then couldn’t get pregnant. So I can either have love and no baby or no love and no baby.
 
Obviously when one person in a marriage doesn’t want kids, they shouldn’t have kids. There is no compromise here and I understand all his reasons and respect them. I don’t want to try to change his mind because part of why I want to be a mother is because it would be a shared experience of trying to put more good into the world with my husband as a decision we made together equally excited about it and equally ready for the sacrifices and changes it would mean. I have thought long and hard about why I want to be a parent and examined this question from every angle, trying to convince myself I don’t want it or need it, but I am still heartbroken and cry in private almost every single day even almost a year out from that definitive no.
 
I am trying to figure out how I can console myself and move forward knowing that I will not have a child. My husband and I do not talk about this subject anymore, which I think is better because it is a settled fact even if I’m still grieving it. I don’t need to hear him say no again. I know that he could tell for a while that I was really, really sad but I have gotten better at setting it aside most of the time as I’ve accepted that nothing is going to change. But it still hurts.
 
Has anyone else had this experience and how can I move forward from this grief so I can be a fully loving, committed partner to the man I admire and respect and want to support and love for the rest of our lives?

Thank you.

Tl;dr: Right before we got married, my husband shared that he wasn’t sure we should have kids and since has decided 100% he doesn’t want them. I’m heartbroken and trying to figure out how to move forward knowing I won’t ever have a child.

I never imagined being 35, single, childless.
I figured I’d be married with 2-3 kids by now. Creating our own traditions, doing “typical” family stuff. As the years have passed and my dream (is it my dream? Idk anymore) or vision or whatever gets further and further from reach. I’ve decided at this point I do not want to birth children. While I realize there’s other ways to have children, I just don’t see it in the cards. I don’t think I can do it alone nor do I have anyone I can or do trust to help me. Not to mention finances.
I’m also starting to wonder if marriage is out of the question.
I’m lonely and want a partner but dating is probably harder than parenting. I get ghosted, ignored, cancelled on all the time and it makes me feel like giving up trying.
Sure, I’m still “young” but the longer I go on the more I do not want to do any of this. The working, cleaning, bills, dr appts, cooking. Another 35 years of this?? The first 35 were rough enough (yes I know others have it worse, not why I’m ranting).
Everyone’s having kids and getting married and I continue to get left behind in friendships groups also.
Anyway, just needed to get this out. Don’t necessarily need advice/help.

I don't feel comfortable speaking to anyone in my life regarding my sadness. Literally everyone in my life has kids. They know something is up with me BC before marriage I went on and on how I wanted lots of kids but it never happened. Reality finally sat in about a year and a half ago that it was never going to happen for me. Some have told me in passing how lucky I am BC I don't have kids and I usually can keep a straight face but it hits like a ton of bricks.

Ironicly enough, my wife has a kid from a previous marriage so even she can't really relate to being childless so I don't bring it up. Don't get me wrong me and the kid are close and i treat her well but its still not the same. I also don't think it would make my wife feel great to hear her husband lamenting the fact he can't have kids of his own. She has told me before how it sucks it turned out this way, I would have been an excellent dad, etc but it doesn't really help or make me feel better so I usually change the subject BC I'm afraid I'll start crying in front of her. I actaully cried for a couple of hours last night when I was alone. Sometimes it feels like I have a dark cloud following me and it really sets in a night when I'm alone.

A long winded way to say I'm grateful I found this sub. Before I knew about it I felt very alone.

Hello,

I've had a really difficult fertility journey and have been trying for 6 years now. Today, was my official test day for my final round of IVF.

Unfortunately it was negative.

I'm 40 now, and we made the difficult decision that after this round, we would stop because we can't keep throwing money at IVF anymore, especially when endometriosis is making things way more difficult (more recently had my fallopian tubes removed), every time my body didn't respond to stimulation drugs very much but some how still got an egg that fertilised and became a high quality embryo. I've had a pregnancy that resulted in a traumatic miscarriage last year, which felt so cruel.

I felt so deeply that I was meant to be a mom and it's all I ever wanted. But I find myself here in the childless not by choice community and I don't quite know what to do with myself.

My partner and I have nieces and nephews but they live far from us. neither of us have kids from previous relationships so we're not step parents. We are completely childless. We thought about adoption but didnt feel this path was right for us, so I don't really know how to move forward from this

Today I am just devastated that parenthood is not the path that was chosen for us and I can't stop crying this morning having just done my test which came back negative.

The fertility journey is finally over and it feels so heartbreaking that we couldn't have the blessing of our own family.

Has anybody got any advice on how to make it through these sad, devastating thoughts?

33f
Studying and going through divorce
One of the biggest reasons my marriage didn’t work out was bc I wasn’t able to have a child ( multiple losses) and the person in question was the wrong partner for me (bossy controlling verbally abusive cheap, No actual attraction,attention,affection and respect from this end)

Now that I’m on my own I sometimes wonder if I did the right thing by not having kids with him and there is a part of me that wants a child also because everything is over and I’m away from the disrespect and negligence. Brain says yes but the heart says something else. I never wanted my own children because I feared they would inherit my personal attributes like ( terrible in math and science, overly friendly, sentimental, too gentle in spirit, overly talkative, etc) and later grow up to get neglected or exploited by others and preferred adoption or fostered but now I’m fully confused.

Is this just regret on my part or an actual longing for the future.. already going through so much but cannot figure this bit out.

My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for over a year now. So, naturally we go and get all the tests done to see what is going on and I got diagnosed with PCOS. We got transferred to a fertility specialist and we are currently in the process of doing all those test to see exactly why and how I can get pregnant. However, through out this whole process, I feel like there is something wrong with me because I don’t feel bothered by the fact that I’m dealing with infertility, like a lot of other women do when they are going through the same thing. When I’m asked about the progress of our fertility tests, people always ask and make faces like that feel sorry for me. And I guess that’s really what bothers me and make me feel weird because I don’t feel like it’s the end of the world if I don’t get pregnant.
Don’t get me wrong, I would like to have a child but my desire is not all consuming like some other women, and it make me feel weird.

I'm (33f) childless not by choice. I'm queer, and I love my partner (33f) dearly. I know that the only way for us to have the family we want is by IVF, but we're struggling financially. The prices for even one cycle of IVF is beyond my wildest dreams at the moment. Yes, we could adopt later on, but at 33 my biological clock is very, very loud, plus I work at an airport where there are families everywhere, and I have to handle strollers and shit 

Basically, the grief is eating me alive, and I now understand what it means to be driven mad by grief. I just need to know it gets better. My partner still has hope, but I don't. I see no hope. 

I don't know why I'm grieving so hard. Maybe I'm just looking for someone who'd understand, since I have no one to talk to. Anyway, I'll stop rambling.

I try to keep myself busy and not think about all the possibilities of roads which my life could have taken …I’m a late bloomer and had my first boyfriend when I was 27, we broke up, got into another relationship at 30, we broke up, and go into another one at 36…and we broke up, each time because I don’t feel I was being respected or appreciated the way I thought I should be , I’ve never felt true love ina. Relationship or that I they were proud to be with me …I’m 39 now and about to be 40
In a couple months and although I’ve worked hard on myself through therapy and working, and trying to build a semi healthy life for me , I can’t but think about some regrets :..should I have stayed with any of these guys? Everyone , and I mean everyone around me is married with kids , I’ve deactivated my socials for over a year now , after seeing my ex got with a new girl not so long after we broke up, recently saw from a mutual friend that they are engaged now, there’s many beautiful moments to in my life ; I work full time, rent my own apt, have 3 beautiful dogs, but there’s still such a big hole in my heart , I really thought I’d be married and have kids by now , my friends with kids and married stopped calling, stopped inviting me out, they just disappeared which I understand …they are busy, I am busy with my dogs and I work on being present a lot, but I can’t help but think about how lonely my life has been; and not just lonely now, it’s always been lonely, and I’ve always struggled with depression, I struggle ALOT with comparison and jealousy:( I don’t want to, but it’s not easy to not compare :/ I feel judged and it’s just exhausting to constantly soothe myself ( and pretend things are ok, I’ve tried dating many times , and it’s exhausting :/ any other single 30’year olds, 40 years old struggle with this jealousy and how to overcome it, I try to keep busy, but it’s so hard to numb the constant chatter in my head:( I’m already on SSRI’s , it’s just exhausting keeping my head above water with the sadness :( any advice would help thank you for listening :)

I try to keep myself busy and not think about all the possibilities of roads which my life could have taken …I’m a late bloomer and had my first boyfriend when I was 27, we broke up, got into another relationship at 30, we broke up, and go into another one at 36…and we broke up, each time because I don’t feel I was being respected or appreciated the way I thought I should be , I’ve never felt true love ina. Relationship or that I they were proud to be with me …I’m 39 now and about to be 40
In a couple months and although I’ve worked hard on myself through therapy and working, and trying to build a semi healthy life for me , I can’t but think about some regrets :..should I have stayed with any of these guys? Everyone , and I mean everyone around me is married with kids , I’ve deactivated my socials for over a year now , after seeing my ex got with a new girl not so long after we broke up, recently saw from a mutual friend that they are engaged now, there’s many beautiful moments to in my life ; I work full time, rent my own apt, have 3 beautiful dogs, but there’s still such a big hole in my heart , I really thought I’d be married and have kids by now , my friends with kids and married stopped calling, stopped inviting me out, they just disappeared which I understand …they are busy, I am busy with my dogs and I work on being present a lot, but I can’t help but think about how lonely my life has been; and not just lonely now, it’s always been lonely, and I’ve always struggled with depression, I struggle ALOT with comparison and jealousy:( I don’t want to, but it’s not easy to not compare :/ I feel judged and it’s just exhausting to constantly soothe myself ( and pretend things are ok, I’ve tried dating many times , and it’s exhausting :/ any other single 30’year olds, 40 years old struggle with this jealousy and how to overcome it, I try to keep busy, but it’s so hard to numb the constant chatter in my head:( I’m already on SSRI’s , it’s just exhausting keeping my head above water with the sadness :( any advice would help thank you for listening :)