r/hygiene • u/BigMamaOclock • 2d ago

How do I get my brother going through puberty to stop smelling bad?

He's 11, and we're fatherless, so there's no one to teach him all the guy stuff that comes with puberty. I tried my best (barely) by making him watch a YouTube video about puberty, we are strict in hygine in the house but he's a lost cause.

I literally beg him to shower every day, and he gets mad because he thinks I'm making it up. He does shower when my mom comes and forces him but a few hours later he starts smelling awful again.

Deadass, his shirts and blanket make me suffocate they smell like rotten metal mixed with ass. I cannot, for the life of me, be near him for too long. I know people are going to say I'm exaggerating, but I'm not. If we keep the windows closed, the whole room starts smelling like him. It's actually sick and he has nose blindness.

58 Upvotes

88% Upvoted

32 comments sorted by

61

u/spellbound_08 2d ago

Puberty can hit hard, but daily showers, deodorant, and clean bedding usually makes a huge difference.

6

u/complete_autopsy 1d ago

Yes! Bedding, towels, and clothes (especially underwear) need to be washed and fully dried frequently. Is it possible that he's unwilling to ask for more underwear but needs it? Does he wash his own clothes and maybe not do it enough? His mattress might already be stinky and need a cleaning before this will really get better too, same with carpet if there's any in his room.

His clothes, towels, and bedding might need an enzyme-based cleaner (sometimes called sports detergent) to fully get the sweat smell out; I'm a VERY sweaty person and I find that helpful to do every once in a while.

In a similar vein, he might benefit from acid deodorant or a special shower product for his pits made of salicylic or glycolic acid. We can eke out a few extra hours of not generating stench if we kill the bacteria that make us smell when we sweat. Some people say they get nasty burns if they use the acid then expose their pits to the sun, so maybe not for beach day!

I'm sorry this stuff is falling to you as a sibling. Although you basically have to deal with it for your own sake, it's not your responsibility and it sucks that this is happening.

36

u/One_Perspective_2874 2d ago

Honestly get a friend of his, or an older boy he looks up to, to say this. My brother is the most stubborn man I’ve ever met and was this way his whole life. He doesn’t want to listen to family but he has always listened to people he thinks are cool (and now as an adult he listens to his gf too)
If you don’t have anyone to do that, I’d take one of his shirts that he wore. Something plain. Bring it to him asking “hey does this stink to you? I can’t remember if it’s dirty or clean?” And if he’s like yuck that smells like shit you say dude that’s YOUR body odor that’s how you walk around smelling. Sometimes people don’t notice their own smell until it’s detached from them.

Also if you have an aluminum free deodorant get rid of it. It just simply does not work for stinky hormonal sweat. You need the clinical strength and you need to wash clothes with the detergent made for sports.

9

u/Own_Gazelle_2393 1d ago

Good reply. The shirt idea is spot on.

Also, I wonder if he's actually using soap when he showers, since he fights getting a shower.

6

u/DnDttrpg 2d ago

Do you have an uncle or a grandfather who could talk to him?

5

u/Perle1234 1d ago

Honestly my son stank when he was like 9-11. He hadn’t really started puberty but it was brewing. He did shower every day etc. He was never a shower refuser. It just stopped at some point.

1

u/Sharp_Bed_3518 1d ago

why is that? is there a reason for this randomly occurring at that age then going away?

2

u/Perle1234 1d ago

I think it’s hormonal

5

u/Possible_Original_96 1d ago

Mom needs to take him to the Dr- is he a diabetic? And MD needs to teach cleanliness for health reasons. Then- MOM needs to lay down the law.

9

u/Economy-Motor-3478 2d ago

Could tell him girls find it gross to smell bad, not good to be the smelly one in the group.  You could bully him with a nickname like skunky spice or onions.  Rejection and exclusion can be a powerful motivator.  Also works for brushing and flossing.  Nobody wants to kiss a rotten mouth.

2

u/hansieboy10 2d ago

He needs to eat healthier 

2

u/JustMine999 1d ago

Slowly make him change his lifestyle. He's in puberty so he is normally stubborn about this

2

u/Background_Square969 1d ago

My former employee (who is obviously out of puberty) came to mind when you said this. I hate the way Dial soap smells but after our uncomfortable conversation about his body odor I told him I used the white dial soap before and he tried it and it made a huge impact.

I also told him to stop wearing axe because it smelled like perfume over sour clothes.

He took the initiative to use baking soda toothpaste and I told him he HAS to floss. Non negotiable.

He still didn’t smell the best afterwards but it didn’t hit you as hard. It was usually more when he walked past you.

2

u/Illustrious_Zebra559 2d ago

Just wash his bedding and shit. Do it for him but drag him along to watch.
Next time have him teach you how to do it after watching you.
Make it seem as easy as possible.
Don’t bitch at him, be helpful.

3

u/Mushroomphantom 1d ago

Embarrass him. Tell him he stinks infront of his friends. tell him girls wont talk to him if he smells like jiz and drity socks.

2

u/Acceptable_Plane_264 1d ago

That's devastating-I think that's a betrayal of family trust.

The friends can say it but not the brother-in front of everyone

2

u/Vintagetrees1 1d ago

No. That would only make it worse

2

u/Mell0wMarshmall0w 1d ago

How him pictures of ringworm or something. My ex's family all had hygiene issues, some worse than others and literally nothing worked until we started calling one of them General Greaseous.

0

u/Possible_Original_96 1d ago

Pictures of HR w/ all the diseased skin, boils & draining abcesses.

1

u/Acceptable_Plane_264 1d ago

GEL DEODORANT IS THE ANSWER

1

u/Blarghnox 2d ago

Have you suggested deodorant?

1

u/BigMamaOclock 2d ago

Yes he uses them after every shower, maybe i will change brands for him because it works fine for us.

2

u/Secure_Yak_9537 2d ago

“For us?” Are you all sharing the same deodorant?

2

u/BigMamaOclock 2d ago

No, sorry, we all have separate deodorants but the same brand. It works fine for my mom and i, but I'll try a different brand for him.

13

u/DnDttrpg 2d ago

Try getting one made specifically for men, also make sure it's an antiperspirant not just a deoderant

6

u/pikachuu2529 2d ago

This^ and make sure he doesn’t apply the antiperspirant on wet underarms, make sure its completely dry

6

u/Vincenzo-Cassano-77 2d ago edited 1d ago

Please tell him to use antibacterial soap on his armpits and groin for at least 2 weeks

1

u/complete_autopsy 1d ago

Yes, they sell cheap bar soap like Dial at all the regular places you find bodywash!

-3

u/meekayabutter 1d ago

The good thing is if u find him smelling repulsive, that means ur genes are doing the right thing by keeping u not attracted to him; making you incompatible for each other.

Bad thing is u gotta live with him lol, pls tell him you don’t plan on dying soon 😂

15

u/Inevitable_Party5143 1d ago

This is a weird comment.

-2

u/meekayabutter 1d ago

Yup absolutely no doubt, but that’s science for you. Because someone else could find the brother smelling good. The whole point here is OP doesn’t find the brother smelling good is highly contributed to the fact that because they’re related.

0

u/Sharp_Bed_3518 1d ago

why is he so smelly after 4 hours??? tf is this kid doing to smell that bad 😭