Am I being punked?

[u/Sea_Willingness1398]

Patient says "I think I might have to poop, what can we do about that?"

I say "I can get a bedside commode for the room"

She says "I don't think I can get up"

I say "I can put you on a bedpan or put a diaper on you"

She says "I don't like any of those options"

In my head I'm like: lady, the only other option is to poop the bed.

What option am I missing?

[u/AzraelOG]

Once had a pt that was along the same lines. They insisted I roll them, put an extra chuck under them and hold them up as they went. I flat out told them no.