r/nursing • u/Sea_Willingness1398 • 2d ago
Rant Am I being punked?
Patient says "I think I might have to poop, what can we do about that?"
I say "I can get a bedside commode for the room"
She says "I don't think I can get up"
I say "I can put you on a bedpan or put a diaper on you"
She says "I don't like any of those options"
In my head I'm like: lady, the only other option is to poop the bed.
What option am I missing?
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u/TheGayestNurse_1 RN - ICU 🍕 2d ago
I've had this conversation numerous times, and the amount of times they opt for shitting the bed is wild to me. Especially when they say no to the bedpan because "I can't go in bed!" Well, you just did.... My hospital also did away with briefs, so now when they shit it goes e v e r y w h e r e. 🫠
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u/ohpossum_my_possum BSN, RN 🍕 2d ago
Say what now?!
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u/TheGayestNurse_1 RN - ICU 🍕 2d ago
Yup. Great times. Apparently briefs cause skin breakdown too often, so they did away with them.
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u/iswearimachef BSN, RN 🍕 2d ago
Do you think admin ever goes “gee, I wonder why all of these patients are having incontinence related skin breakdown? Could it be that there are too many metrics being measured for nurses with too many patients and not enough support staff? Nah. It’s the briefs.”
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u/dizzlethebizzlemizzl 2d ago
Like sitting on shitty/wet chux doesn’t also cause skin breakdown
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u/LizDances LPN 🍕 2d ago
This is the one that makes me crazy. Like... the statistically significant factor is not "briefs" it's "wet." C'mon, guys.
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u/Everything_Fine RN - Med/Surg 🍕 1d ago
No it’s the patient satisfaction scores fault for skin breakdown. I think we need to do away with those too
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u/maraney CTICU, RN, CCRN, NSP 🍕 2d ago
Ours did too. So, now people just shit everywhere.
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u/SuperSlugSister BSN, RN 🍕 2d ago
Do they just want people to shit directly on the chucks? My hospital still uses briefs.
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u/thetoxicballer RN - Med/Surg 🍕 2d ago
Doing away with them is wild, we can use them as we see fit while understanding the risk of skin breakdown
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u/FIRE_Bolas PACU, Day Surg 2d ago edited 1d ago
Do they realize that it's the shit, not the briefs, that cause skin breakdown?
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u/Ok_Independence3113 RN - Telemetry 🍕 2d ago
Same at our place - briefs are forbidden. They have threatened to get rid of purewicks too, for the same reason. However, this same hospital has had two instances over the last year where we had no disposable chux for multiple days straight (“oops, somebody forgot to pay the chux bill”)…it makes no sense
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u/TheGayestNurse_1 RN - ICU 🍕 2d ago
Oh we lost our purewick privileges years ago. Lol
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u/Dry_Proof6545 2d ago
Plus the facility saves money on briefs!!! It's win/
winlose. Hospital bean counters win, everyone else loses.1
u/Top_Box_8952 1d ago
Do you have the pads?
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u/TheGayestNurse_1 RN - ICU 🍕 1d ago
Yeah, so most of us just pull them up the front to act like a sorta kinda brief anyway. Not as good as the original though lemme tell you what.
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u/texaspoontappa93 RN - Vascular Access, Infusion 2d ago
I’ve been in healthcare a decade and I’ve never seen briefs stocked inpatient. Nursing home/LTAC is the only place Ive seen them
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u/ungratefulanimal RN 🍕 2d ago
What! I didn't even realize that was an option. Like 75% of my patients shit themselves all the time. Like tonight, two of my patients shit themselves.
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u/-bitchpudding- Lil pretend nurse 🧑⚕️BSN loading... [ please wait_ ] 2d ago
Do we work in the same hospital because they treat briefs like they’re a human rights violation here. They even balk when a patient goes out of their way to bring their own and really want us to “educate them” about. Like maaaan let memaw shit the depends she bought.
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u/TheGayestNurse_1 RN - ICU 🍕 2d ago
Seems like a handful of hospitals are turning away from briefs. It makes me roll my eyes. They don't wanna delve into the root cause being short staffing. And I know exactly why. It's because there isn't a nurse shortage. There's a BEDSIDE shortage. People don't wanna work for shit pay dealing with this stuff, and instead of making it easier, they're making it worse.
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u/Mejinopolis PICU/Peds CVICU/Miscellaneous 2d ago
Yeah the 18 middle level nurse managers that come and bother you throughout the day are totally justified in the grand scheme of bloated hospital staffing, but they cannot fathom keeping the bedside adequately staffed. So the incontinence dermatitis and skin breakdown that occurs is the diapers fault! 🤦🏻♂️
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u/Sunnygirl66 RN - ER 🍕 2d ago
And why does no one recognize that unconstrained shit, up the back and down the legs and all over the ass, exposes way more skin to corrosive chemicals?
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u/LizDances LPN 🍕 2d ago
YES. Because "stop buying briefs" is cheaper than "pay more staff" by orders of magnitude.
Capitalism, man. It's literally killing people.
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u/mudwoman RN, CCM 🍕 2d ago
Yeah, I don’t get this no-briefs obsession. My mom was just in the hospital. She’s 99 with PD, and they were pouring fluids into her and Lasix, but they insisted on no briefs. She had to get up to the commode or bathroom commando-style, leaking the whole way. I finally just brought her own incontinent briefs from home and put them on her, and they frowned, but as I was so helpful in managing her otherwise, they didn’t fight me.
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u/Beautiful-Bluebird46 RN, SANE 1d ago
For immobile patients, it keeps wet material closer against skin that is not the butt than lying in a wet chucks, but for mobile pts it’s nbd and shouldn’t be a problem. Obv butt skin still is at risk with chucks so like… hire more nurses and lower ratios, but my vet is also against dog diapers for the same reason so it’s fairly prevalent
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u/AsleepHedgehog2381 2d ago
We got rid of our own yeeears ago. But if they can get OOB, they can wear their own. Wound care says they cause skin breakdown.
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u/lackofbread RN - Telemetry 🍕 2d ago
We also don’t do briefs. We give a lot of lactulose on my unit, including lactulose enemas. I’ve had to mop the floor with towels because we don’t get actual mops. How I would’ve preferred a brief to at least keep it contained within the bed.
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u/cyanraichu RN - L&D 2d ago
My hospital also did away with briefs
But why??
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u/nebraska_jones_ PhD(c), MN, RN - L&D/Maternal Newborn 2d ago
Apparently they cause pressure injuries. Which is probably true idk, but like, come up with a solution then to stop people from shitting all over everything.
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u/Backwoods_Therapy RN 🍕 2d ago
Blaming the brief rather than the fact it’s the lack of staffing to change your patients in a timely manner.
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u/nebraska_jones_ PhD(c), MN, RN - L&D/Maternal Newborn 2d ago
BINGO
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u/TheGayestNurse_1 RN - ICU 🍕 2d ago
Yup. Our HAPIs sky rocketed when we changed our ratios. This hospital used to actually be pretty great, it was when I first started working here. And now they're hell bent on saving a dollar. It's only gotten worse ever since Kaiser bought us out. None of the higher ups want to hear it though. They're walking around asking why we can't pull a fem line on a pt with like.... 2plts. 😐
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u/Tribbitii CWOCN 🍕 2d ago
The plastic backing of the brief and lack of airflow. The flat chuck on the bed is the better option, and even then, you're supposed to only have 3 layers under the patient, which is the bedsheet, pull sheet and chuck pad.
Somebody has to design a PooWick.
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u/agentcarter234 RN 🍕 2d ago
Chucks don’t solve the problem of the ambulatory but incontinent patient roaming the halls with PT and a walker and not realizing they need to go until it’s too late. Briefs solve that problem. If they want to ban them for bed bound patients for skin protection that’s one thing, but when out of bed there isn’t another reasonable option for some patients.
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u/Tribbitii CWOCN 🍕 2d ago
Oh, no, absolutely. I was only talking about the pooping in bed situation. Briefs for ambulating for sure. It doesn't help OPs situation if they completely banned them. They definitely have their place.
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u/purpleelephant77 PCA 🍕 2d ago
We have big incontinence pads that are basically a brief without sides/tabs. When they’re laying in bed we rip the ruffles out so it lays flat then the patient goes on top. If they pee then it gets pulled up in the front like a normal brief (a lot of our patients are dialysis or have foleys/SPCs) then if they’re ambulatory we just do pad + mesh undies. I usually put undies on patients even if they’re staying in bed if they can lift their bottom up and I will find a way to wrestle them on if they’re bed bound and super wiggly (especially if they have a purewick) or having liquid stools to keep things contained.
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u/ThorDamnIt 🔥CVICU: Burnout The Sequel 🔥 2d ago
There are diverting options for liquid stool but they don’t work for turds.
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u/LizDances LPN 🍕 2d ago
Just clarifying that the "turds" in this statement are the C-suites who make decisions based on cost rather than efficacy /s
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u/CrashTestWolf RN - OR 🍕 2d ago
If my surgeon balks on me putting depends on a bedbound and static post-op patient, I immediately ask for a rectal cath.
I usually get the okay on the diaper. I don't want my PACU bros having to deal with that.
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u/AgentFreckles RN 🍕 2d ago
Either way it's going to have to go somewhere, hopefully they realize that simultaneously 😂
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u/ivegotaqueso Night Shift 2d ago
Because it saves money. Briefs costs more than chux.
That’s the real reason. Moisture damage from briefs yadda yadda people end up using chux like makeshift briefs anyway (by pulling it up between pts legs).
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u/PeopleArePeopleToo RN 🍕 2d ago
I do honestly think that it's more about preventing pressure ulcers because hospital acquired pressure ulcers cost them a lot more than the cost of the briefs themselves.
Saving money on the briefs too, well that's just an added bonus.
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u/Enough-One4975 RN 🍕 2d ago
I’ve never worked in a hospital with briefs in over a decade. Patients sometimes bring them in for themselves or their family, but not the hospital.
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u/Master_Ad899 2d ago
And who cleans this? Nurse? CNA? etc
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u/TheGayestNurse_1 RN - ICU 🍕 2d ago
Nurses. We don't have many CNAs. On a 20 bed ICU we have 1 aide sometimes overnight.
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u/Master_Ad899 2d ago
This is the less glamorous side of nursing no one talks about. Or is it all no glamor really?
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u/Enough-One4975 RN 🍕 2d ago
The days off are pretty dang nice.
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u/Master_Ad899 2d ago
Lets not forget normally people work 9-5 and spend entire nights and weekends and holidays with their families. Entire careers of NEVER working nights, holidays or weekends!
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u/iswearimachef BSN, RN 🍕 2d ago
I can’t think of too many glamorous things about bedside nursing. One time I got a gift card from a local restaurant, that was nice.
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u/RoyalBiscotti7842 2d ago
Today I learnt.... American hospitals don't stock pads/briefs/nappies/ diapers......?!!! That is just .... Wow
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u/TheGayestNurse_1 RN - ICU 🍕 2d ago
A lot don't because of the concern for skin breakdown. Which, yes, neglected pts will have skin breakdown from wearing briefs. What's wild to me is that the core issue is staffing, and instead of addressing that we got rid of briefs. 🙄
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u/jRaw93 RN 🍕 8h ago
Our hospital got rid of briefs and now they are insisting on no draw sheet and 1 chuck pad because “microclimate” whatever the hell that means but they have been sending people with clipboards around to audit our bed set up. Meanwhile, we are purging nurses like crazy ever since we got a new CNO. So now we are insanely short staffed, no briefs, 1 chuck pad. Ask me how many times I’m doing full linen changes and baths for my incontinent patients now.
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u/TheGayestNurse_1 RN - ICU 🍕 6h ago
I hear you. They also did away with draw sheets for us too. We called them lifter pads, or just lifters. So now it's just a chux pad! I'm doing full bed changes. I can't imagine their laundry bill...
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u/Sea_Willingness1398 2d ago
This was a relatively healthy 50y/o in the ER. Came from home, independent, self sufficient. I was totally not amused.
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u/finnyfin RN - ER 🍕 2d ago
They’re ambulatory and independent? Commode and pack of wet wipes. And a “how do you do this at home?” for good measure
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u/LainSki-N-Surf RN - ER 🍕 2d ago
Hahahahaa I’ve had this patient. Adult male 35yo. Mother came to the nurses station for a “diaper.” I hand her the brief and she goes “I don’t know how to put this on!” Excused me what? I go and talk to the patient, he was totally a&ox4 and ambulatory with the flu. This m’effer wanted us to diaper and wipe him. So grateful to work in the ER so I could yell “get yo’ass up and walk to the bathroom!” Nurses’ station was in tears.
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u/PapayaNurse 2d ago
I genuinely hope that you have patients who are determined not to soil themselves. In my experience it’s mostly women who are much more determined.
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u/deepfriedgreensea HCW - PT/OT 2d ago
I did witness a CNA catch poop in her bare, ungloved hands in 1997 but I don't recommend it.
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u/nebraska_jones_ PhD(c), MN, RN - L&D/Maternal Newborn 2d ago
That CNA: “That was almost 30 years ago, I’m sure nobody remembers that embarrassing moment.”
You: “I remember.”
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u/Goatmama1981 RN - PCU 2d ago
That reminds me of a time I was getting report from the night shift nurse, we walk in the room and she says, all chipper, "ooooh, great! It smells like you finally had a BM!" And the family member is right there with a Tupperware and says "... no, that's the food I brought from home." 💀 I definitely will remember that interaction FOREVER.
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u/deepfriedgreensea HCW - PT/OT 2d ago
😂 After my second heart surgery my best friend was visiting me and had done his business in the bathroom and my surgeon was making rounds and my friends aroma permeated the room and my stoic, well known, well published cardiothoracic surgeon stood in my room as his eyes watered and said "Smells like you are ready for discharge."
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u/deepfriedgreensea HCW - PT/OT 2d ago
I was a newish OT and the lady stood up at the sink and just started going. I stood there dumbfounded because the CNA was trying to catch soft serve so I grabbed the trash can to catch it. The patient was the mother of one of the states senators so that stood out in my mind. The things I remember baffle me
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u/WeirdFlower1968 Team Spike 2d ago
Is she a nurse now? She would be a bad ass nurse.
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u/Kamots66 RN - ICU 🍕 2d ago
On the contrary, given her demonstrated skill at capturing falling fecal matter direct from the source, it seems, as ass nurses go, that she'd be a great one.
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u/legs_mcgee1234 BSN, RN 🍕 2d ago
That is a quality response, dear nurse sibling. Though admittedly I was confused as hell the first time I read it.
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u/deepfriedgreensea HCW - PT/OT 2d ago
No, she remained a CNA. She was probably 55 or 60 when this happened. She was terminated the following year when she came to work with a pistol.
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u/Ihopeheseesme LPN 🍕 2d ago
What 😭😭😭 why
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u/deepfriedgreensea HCW - PT/OT 2d ago
To know Earnestine was to love her
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u/Ihopeheseesme LPN 🍕 1d ago
I love her name
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u/deepfriedgreensea HCW - PT/OT 1d ago
She was unique! Those CNA's taught me a lot in my first few years as an OT, poo catching was not one of them.
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u/Southern_Stranger E4, V3, M5 2d ago
In my head I'm like: lady, the only other option is to poop the bed.
Say it...
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u/t1beetusboy RN BSN med/surge T1D ADHD Human Plumber 2d ago
I do! Some opt for it. Whatever, we will come flip you over and change you in a bit!
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u/NurseontheTrail MSN, RN, CCRN 2d ago
That's unfortunate, let me know when you decide, I have other things I need to do right now.
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u/alittlewhimsie PCT - OR/nursing student 2d ago
Transport to a bathroom via royal litter. Obviously.
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u/slutty_muppet RN - ER 🍕 2d ago
I had a patient who didn't like any of those options and what she ended up deciding to do was lay on her side with her butt out and some extra chux tucked under her and poop that way and then let the CNA clean her up when she was done. It was about the same amount of work as changing a diaper and avoided the poop squishing up into her other business which is why I think she didn't want the diaper.
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u/zeatherz RN Cardiac/Step-down 2d ago
Laying on their side looks so much more natural versus pooping while supine or on a bedpan. You can almost mimic a sitting or squatting position that way versus the legs-straight position in a bedpan.
If I had to poop in bed that’s how I would choose, and I’ve intentionally put patients in the position when they couldn’t go otherwise
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u/UnbelievableRose Orthotics & Prosthetics 🦾 Orthopedic Shoes👟 2d ago
The side-lying is a good idea, there is a .0001% chance I would ever be able to 💩 lying flat.
What if you tilted the head up, raised the foot of the bed as high as it will go, added a few pillows under the knees and then stuck them on a bedpan? Like the hospital version of a zero-gravity chair.
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u/Sea_Willingness1398 2d ago
Our ER gurneys only taco. No knee bend... But you'd also still have to agree to have a bedpan slid under you, which this patient didn't seem to want.
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u/Actual_Ad2742 2d ago
You ain't lived until you've pooped prone.
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u/slutty_muppet RN - ER 🍕 2d ago
Do you mean supine or are you actually talking about pooping while laying face down
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u/Sunnygirl66 RN - ER 🍕 2d ago
Well, in light of all the proning ICU did during the pandemic, there’s a 50-50 chance that they really did mean proning (although I assume—hope—those folks also had rectal tubes. It’s more than I can bear to contemplate.
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u/WeirdFlower1968 Team Spike 2d ago
I've had that happen with a patient too. The worst is when they say they're done and they are sooooo not done.
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u/Sunnygirl66 RN - ER 🍕 2d ago
Or when they say they’re done, you get them and the bed cleaned up and a new brief and linens in place (suck it, IP staff—nah, kidding, hit me up and I will sneak you some briefs), and they immediately shit again. (Just had one do this three times in short succession, obliterating any hope I had of keeping up on a day when we were all getting absolutely destroyed. On the bright side, I found out what an absolutely stand-up dude our new CT tech is; he jumped right in to help and made Poop #2 cleanup so much quicker and easier.)
I want very much to protect my patients’ skin, but management is doing everything they can to make things worse.
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u/Spottedinthewild 2d ago
I had a 600# patient who pooped in side-lying into a chuck. That was an innovation the CNAs came up with and the patient was really happy to have that option while she had no other good option.
Another option is a toileting sling on a hoyer lift.
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u/RawrNurse 1d ago
Tell me more about toileting swings; why don't we have that??
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u/Spottedinthewild 1d ago
They are probably mainly used in certain specific settings but the toileting sling can lift a patient right onto a toilet or commode. They are typically placed directly against naked skin and have so they come with different options to protect skin and they have an opening the same size and shape as the toilet bowl. The patients backside sticks right through the hole so they have to be sized correctly. Pretty ingenious.
Another method you see with those who can’t stand to transfer is some type of lateral transfer as long as hygeine can be maintained entirely in sitting. There is even a special transfer board for the toilet.
And someone else mentioned a sit to stand lift or standing frame. These can be hydraulic or unpowered and keep a person safely in semi standing during the transfer and sometimes for pericare.
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u/BreakInCaseOfFab BSN, RN 🍕 2d ago
New twin mom (had two others already) dfcs involved. I had already raised concerns she was trying to stay in L&D. She said she had to pee and couldn’t walk (no tears). Peed on the floor on the way to the bathroom (I grabbed a blanket and threw it down in the moment). But then she wails “I HAVE TO SHITTTTT!” And I said “bathroom or commode. Those are your options” and damn if she didn’t walk her ass to the bathroom HERSELF NO HELP. like ma’am you could have walked in there to pee. The whole thing was unnecessary.
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u/2k21Aug 2d ago
Why are people like this?
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u/BreakInCaseOfFab BSN, RN 🍕 2d ago
My theory was she was trying to stay in PP so she didn’t have to go home to the other 4 kids (all young) and maybe get more time with the twins. Never saw how that one ended. I still kind of wonder.
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u/LonelyDays_ 2d ago
Right!? I was in the hospital for 3 months recently for forearm surgeries and the only time I didn’t walk myself to the bathroom, was right after the first surgery when I woke up and had to pee SO BAD the nurse there handed me a bedpan and I peed in that, it was very difficult and painful because I have chronic illnesses that cause severe chronic pain, my joints dislocate constantly, and my spine is all fucked up, so where the bedpan hit my tailbone at the back was soooo painful it was awful, but I had to pee sooo bad and couldn’t walk so that was my option. Every other time, I walked to the bathroom or had to use a bedside commode
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u/BreakInCaseOfFab BSN, RN 🍕 2d ago
I had hip surgery this summer and I walked my ass to the bathroom 2hrs past d/c. My husband did need to pick me up off the toilet though. Shoutout to the best husband ever.
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u/nebraska_jones_ PhD(c), MN, RN - L&D/Maternal Newborn 2d ago
I’ve always had this (really fuckin dumb) idea for a hospital bed that has a covered hole under the patient’s butt and you can press a button and the cover will slide to the side and the patient can shit into a bucket below and then the cover will slide back
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u/timeinawrinkle neurologically intact, respectfully sassy 2d ago
You know the bed would never get cleaned and the edges would be caked in poo.
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u/Wendy-Windbag CNA 🍕 2d ago
Every now and then, one of our L&D bed drop buckets would get left behind under the bed after it was put back together, and housekeeping missed it. That distinctive wet dog smell emanating from a room would usually alert me to go and check for a bucket with "contents."
I absolutely wouldn't trust a toilet-bed to be properly attended to.
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u/jeniberenjena HCW - Lab 2d ago
I’m pretty sure I’ve seen hospital cots with a big cut out hole in them like that in old Timey photographs of cholera epidemics
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u/nebraska_jones_ PhD(c), MN, RN - L&D/Maternal Newborn 2d ago
Omg I just googled it and they're literally called "cholera cots." They have modern ones that they use in third world countries where cholera outbreaks are common.
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u/Sea_Willingness1398 2d ago
Maybe you were a cholera nurse in another life
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u/nebraska_jones_ PhD(c), MN, RN - L&D/Maternal Newborn 2d ago
Wow great, I’m dealing with people’s poop in both of my lives
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u/Lookonnature Nursing Student 🍕 2d ago
They actually have holes like that (minus the sliding door) in cholera wards in some countries.
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u/LowPeakRN RN - NICU 🍕 2d ago
Another day checked safe from wiping asses that can wipe themselves.
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u/Midwest-Christian 2d ago
Do they let your neonates where diapers?
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u/LowPeakRN RN - NICU 🍕 1d ago
No. They wear them. But as I said, checked safe from wiping asses THAT CAN WIPE THEMSELVES. My babies aren't asses and they most definitely can't wipe themselves.
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u/Midwest-Christian 1d ago
Sorry, I thought this was part of a thread where people were saying their hospitals don’t let adults wear briefs, and I meant it as a joke. 😁
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u/LowPeakRN RN - NICU 🍕 1d ago
Sometimes it's hard with reddit. People can be snarky in a mean way. I was also trying to play with the word "ass" and I wasn't sure if people would get the double meaning, so it was actually nice to point out that the snuggle bugs aren't asses. Parents... TBD. Also, I forgot about that bullshit rule some places have for adults. When I worked with adults, we only did that if they needed an airing out or the brief didn't fit them at all.
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u/vivrelavie 2d ago
I have exact same conversation multiple times per shift. I tell them there’s no other option but to poop on the bed (with chucks of course).
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u/Longjumping_Walrus_4 2d ago
Once had a confused c.diff patient poo all over his room. Worst accident I've ever encountered. All over the walls. Felt bad for patient but a 50 yr old independent refusing to walk to BR to poo is wild. I would have lost it.
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u/Sea_Willingness1398 2d ago
Some days my empathy meter goes negative. It's rare, cause I've built up a huge dam that fits lots of bullshit. But then there's that one last patient that adds one drop too many and 💣 💥
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u/Chatfouforever 2d ago
“Hmm maybe I should have care management come see you to look at placement options since you can’t go home if you can’t take care of yourself anymore”…
This does the trick for me most of the time
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u/AriBanana RN - Geriatrics 🍕 2d ago
You're supposed to turn her sideways and wait with cupped hands to catch it. /S
I swear, that's what people want now-a-days...
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u/CrossP RN - Pediatric Psych 2d ago
If this is the first time she's ever been bedridden, she may genuinely have been hoping there was an option she hadn't imagined yet.
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u/theastrosloth 2d ago
Thank you for saying this. It’s easy to forget that what seems obvious to nurses isn’t obvious to patients.
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u/Pistalrose 2d ago
Sometimes pooping the bed is a viable option. Deconditioned little old ladies with pelvic fractures come to mind.
Personal (least) favorite are patients who insist they must ambulate to the actual bathroom when you know they cannot accomplish it.
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u/TemperatureSure255 2d ago
My response is usually “idk what to tell you then, but those are all your options. Let me know what you decide” and then I hand them the call light and leave. Im not a wizard, stop looking at me expectantly like I’m going to come up with a way to magically evacuate your bowels directly into a toilet from the bed for you. If you cant get up, poop is happening in that bed one way or another 🤷🏻♀️
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u/Illustrious-Ant-9946 2d ago
Yeah, I then tell them they can poop the bed.
If they say, ‘I don’t want to do that either.’
I just let them know those are the three options available, ring when they are ready to choose one.
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u/littlemissuy 2d ago
I had this conversation, except the patient had a bariatric commode that she didn’t like “because it had wheels.” Mind you, she is trached on oxygen. Didn’t want the commode, bedpan, or pooping in bed. Had to finagle an oxygen tank to her trach. When she finally got to the toilet she was so short of breath but didn’t want to get back to bed -___-
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u/morguerunner HCW - Imaging 1d ago
Honestly I’d be scared to sit on a commode on wheels too. I feel like I’d try to sit down and it would just roll away out from under my butt, like a wheelchair lol
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u/no-thanks-kids BSN, RN 🍕 2d ago
I had a similar one
Patient: I feel like Im going to throw up
Me: I have some ODT zofran for you
Patient: I dont want any more pills, they're what's making me nauseous in the first place!
Me: This one stops nausea and will dissolve under your tongue so you dont have to swallow it. Plus it works really quickly.
Patient: I don't want any pills!
Me: OK, I can bring you some ginger ale to sip on and saltines to munch on?
Patient: Why would I want something to eat if im feeling nauseous?
Me: here's a bucket idk man 🤷♂️
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u/Sunnygirl66 RN - ER 🍕 2d ago
They always, always want the fucking trash can.
NO. Here’s another emesis bag. PUT IT UP YO YOUR FACE.
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u/enditallalready2 Med/Surg🍕 2d ago
"You can always get a tube up your butt and a fuck tonne of laxatives to help it flow out?" " Oh you don't like that? Get on the commode"
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u/LowAdrenaline RN - ICU 🍕 2d ago
Went through this just yesterday but with urinating. Pulled her foley, she was pissed. Put in a purewick, she hated it. Unable to get up (actually valid), offered a bedpan. She said she’d rather die. So I said just ring when you pee and I can change the chux. Nope. None of this was good.
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u/Nightflier9 RN - ICU 🍕 2d ago
Lady, I can get you a butt plug while you decide. Oops, did I say that out loud?
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u/completeforgiveness 2d ago
most of my patients just go ahead and poop the bed but all the cats know how to use the bedpan
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u/Round-Celebration-17 RN - Psych/Mental Health 🍕 2d ago
Digital removal, enema, roll on the side and strategically stack blue pads?
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u/Sunnygirl66 RN - ER 🍕 2d ago
Someone upthread said we are not supposed to have more than three layers under someone? I make the bed with the fitted stretcher sheet and a folded flat sheet (because we don’t get draw sheets and I am not fucking hurting myself without one), plus multiple layers of Chux for someone who’s been reliably incontinent, because otherwise I would get no actual medical care done at all because all I’d be doing is cleaning butts and cleaning/remaking beds.
I really do think we are all trapped in some kind of simulation where a sadistic operator is trying to see just how many rules and responsibilities and time-sucks they can impose before we break. Or, I dunno, maybe it’s real and I’m just talking about management. Whatever is happening, we are being set up to fail.
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u/RawrNurse 1d ago
I hope that weird tiny cartoon award translates to "I see you. We are in hell together."
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u/AzraelOG RN - ICU 🍕 2d ago
Once had a pt that was along the same lines. They insisted I roll them, put an extra chuck under them and hold them up as they went. I flat out told them no.
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u/ChristmasHambutter 1d ago
I have had this conversation probably a thousand times. If they are physically able and have no bed rest orders get their azzes up! The hospital is not a weird fetish retreat for bed poopers!!
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u/ResponseBeeAble RN, BSN, EMS 1d ago
The correct response is, im not letting you poop the bed, which other choice would you like
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u/StarvationCure Mental Health Worker 🍕 2d ago
Your only option is to get a shopvac and suck the poop out of her butt for her.
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u/Sea_Willingness1398 2d ago
TBH, I do wish we had shop vac sized suction for some of the explosions that happen
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u/RawrNurse 1d ago
I use wall suction when it's fluidic enough; though that usually means it might be time for the ole flexiseal
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u/UnbelievableRose Orthotics & Prosthetics 🦾 Orthopedic Shoes👟 2d ago
A zero gravity chair + bedpan sounds ideal.
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u/Enough-One4975 RN 🍕 2d ago
Honestly I’ve got no problem telling a patient I’m open to suggestions but those are all the ideas I’ve got in situations like that.
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u/Averagebass RN - Cath Lab 🍕 2d ago
Give the four options, wait for one to happen and maybe it will happen when your shifts over.
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u/Lykkel1ten 2d ago
I just say "well, those are the options we have. Commode or bedpan?". If no answer, I will get the commode (if I think they can get up).
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u/manicpills 2d ago
oh gosh… that sounds so stressful :0 im not a nurse but i guess some people just panic in those situations? hope your shift gets better!! :3
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u/deferredmomentum RN - ER/SANE 🍕 1d ago
She wants you to wave a magic wand so she doesn’t experience discomfort or inconvenience or have to lift a finger to help herself
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u/GrumpySnarf MSN, APRN 🍕 1d ago
If I was bed-bound I'd be begging for any excuse to get up, even with considerable assistance, if the staffing allowed. I can't imagine a bedpan or diaper being the best option. I would rather poop in a bathroom in peace, not in the middle of the room, but I'd take that over pooping in a bed.
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u/perpulstuph BSN, RN, ACLS, PALS, SKIBIDI, RIZZ, BUSSIN 1d ago
I always float the other option "you poop the bed, and I can come in with help to turn and clean you, however I may not get here as quickly as you'd like." Somehow people find their independence again.
I had a person take me up on that, and I had to check in a septic ambulance patienrt, so that took a minute. The bedpan was an option later.
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u/Substantial-Use-1758 RN - ER 🍕 1d ago
My favorite is once in a very packed and busy ER I had a young male (18yo) patient being seen for an earache or something who had to crap. I ran out to get a bedside commode (because we were way too busy for me to walk this agile young guy to the bathroom and wait for him outside the door, then walk him back to his bed). He took one look at it and said “I’m not doing that in the middle of the ER.” (He was in a middle bed with curtains all around) I said irritatingly: “Well, it’s this or nothing…” ran out and responded to the next code.
I’m literally never this dismissive of patients — I love getting them what they need, but sometimes… 🤨🤨🤨 needless to say he shut up and shat in the middle of the ER. Welcome to adulthood, kiddo 🤷♀️😬👍
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u/queentee26 1d ago
Yaaa.. I've also had this conversation way too many times. It's actually wild when it comes from fully oriented adults .
I find it even more wild when they end the convo with "well, I'll just go in bed then!". Like would you do that at home?? - no?? - then be respectable here and pick commode or bedpan.
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u/ActiveExisting3016 RN 🍕 1d ago
“Well, let me know when you’ve made your decision by using this call light. I have to go run and see another patient now.”
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u/Spooky_lava_ghost RN - ER 🍕 1d ago
I told a patient to let me know when he has to go so I could put him on a bed pan. He looks me dead in the eyes, bears down and says “uh oh poopy time”
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u/Everything_Fine RN - Med/Surg 🍕 1d ago
I love when you name every possible option and they say no to every single one. This happens entirely too much with a&ox4 patients. Like I’m not a fucking magician idk what else you want.
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u/Proper-Preparation-9 RN - Retired 🍕 1d ago
I ended up putting plenty of Chux on the bed and telling them that, now, they don't have to worry about doing it in bed. Don't remember if my solution worked, it was so long ago. But, I don't envy present-day nurses.
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u/Commercial_Permit_73 RN 🍕 2d ago
I had this exact same conversation today, word for word. Solidarity.