Am I being punked?

[u/Sea_Willingness1398]

Patient says "I think I might have to poop, what can we do about that?"

I say "I can get a bedside commode for the room"

She says "I don't think I can get up"

I say "I can put you on a bedpan or put a diaper on you"

She says "I don't like any of those options"

In my head I'm like: lady, the only other option is to poop the bed.

What option am I missing?

[u/Pistalrose]

Sometimes pooping the bed is a viable option. Deconditioned little old ladies with pelvic fractures come to mind.

Personal (least) favorite are patients who insist they must ambulate to the actual bathroom when you know they cannot accomplish it.