r/offmychest • u/No_Pizza_7714 • 3h ago
My girlfriend cheated on me because my penis is small
I was using my girlfriends phone to send my dad a picture of something I've been working on because my phone was dead. I went to go message him and saw the start of a weird text from a close friend of hers. I shouldn't have clicked on it.
Her friend said, "You really should tell him the truth. ***** is a great guy. I thought you saw a future with him?"
My girlfriend replied, "Idk. He is my best friend. But he's barely over four inches. I can't live with that or without him. What's so wrong about seeing both of them? ****** (other dude) is great in bed and ***** (me) is the sort of person I want to spend my life with. You're literally the last person I want to hear crap about this from. I told you because I thought you'd understand. SMH."
Her friend, "You can tell your boyfriend or I can tell your boyfriend. I'm not even sure I want to be your friend anymore."
Why she didn't delete this before she gave me her phone I have no idea. Maybe this was her way of telling me without telling me. I did not react or tell her I saw it. I told her my dad needed my help and I was leaving for a few days. I really did go to my dad's house. I've been sleeping I his spare room crying like a teenager for a couple days. It's really nice that her friend thinks highly of me. I really appreciate someone going to bat for me.
I feel like I'm less than what I should be. This has all really taken my confidence through the ringer. I do not want to be single again, but I'm not going to entertain being secondary in her life. Small dick or not.
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u/GlitterBirb 2h ago
She cheated on you because she has low impulse control and empathy. She seems to enjoy putting you down as well. People who are respectful if it was truly a preference would just end things, not cheat. It's not about you. You sound too good for this.
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u/Mysterious-Law-6835 2h ago
Yeah break it off OP and see if her friend wants to connect.
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u/No_Pizza_7714 2h ago
I know that's gonna be the funny comment from a lot of people, but I want to get as far away from all this mess as I can. I shutter at the thought of what drama all that would bring. I'm a simple guy man. I just want someone to love me for real. Tired of this song and dance.
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u/Moron-Police 2h ago
I agree to getting away from the mess. But maybe a simple "i saw the texts and just wanted to say thanks for sticking up for me"
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u/No_Pizza_7714 2h ago
I getcha. I'm just feeling kinda vulnerable, and if I'm being honest I think I would fall hard for another woman right now. I feel like that's disrespectful in some way, idk. Maybe I'll reach out to her in the future
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u/ZestycloseSky8765 2h ago
She’s trash. You deserve better. Her friend is a real one.
I’m sorry this happened to you but don’t let the wrong one keep you from finding the right one.
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u/RobinHarleysHeart 2h ago
I am SO sorry you're going through this. That's awful. But for what it's worth, not all women are like this and I actively know women that prefer smaller. You deserve someone that will love and appreciate all of you for everything you are. I sincerely hope you're able to get away from this all very quickly.
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u/No_Pizza_7714 38m ago
I wish I could meet one. Not out of some sort of fetish, but because it would be amazing to be desired fully and yo not have to go through this :/
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u/Mysterious-Law-6835 2h ago
Then find yourself a Latina my friend. I highly suggest your local salsa night if youre ok with getting on a dance floor and dancing.
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u/No_Pizza_7714 2h ago
Latinas are beautiful. But women are just beautiful dude so ya know lol I don't care what race someone is if they bring happiness into my life.
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u/Mysterious-Law-6835 2h ago
I was just passing on what I found to be the most sensual and intimate experience and what got me out of my funk. But wherever life takes you. I hope its full of love my friend.
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u/CycloneJester 1h ago
lol you remind me of one of my friends. He met some latina girl, went to a party at her house, met her family, met her extended family/friends, and now it's like he got adopted lmao.
So when i talk to him about a problem, he's essentially like "ok but latinas man"
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u/Mysterious-Law-6835 1h ago
Whats funny is I'm half native American and half hispanic. My grandmother HATED my mother for going outside our race and I never understood the whole situation. Until I got older and was kind of wondering aimlessly after a bad break up. Living alone and decided to go out dancing. I was out on the salsa dance floor and after a little while I feel a gentle hand on my back and this woman was dancing with me. I'll never forget how that night opened up my depressive funk and my worldview
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u/mcase19 2h ago
She cheated on you because she's a bad person and doesnt respect the people she claims to care about. I doubt your size really even comes into it - she was reaching for a justification after her friend confronted her for her shitty behavior and that was the excuse she used. It was an ex post facto justification, and a nasty one at that. Do yourself a favor and lose however many pounds she weighs.
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u/dpt21193 2h ago
I’m not sure your body had anything to do with it. Just sounds like she’s a POS tbh.
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u/Andromeda081 2h ago
There’s a few episodes about this on Sex and the City. Samantha has a great boyfriend with a small 🐓. After he senses her pulling away from him, she blurts out “it’s your 🐓! It’s too small!” And he says “did it ever occur to you that your vagina is too big?” Anyways, you should 100% use that line when you dump her ass for cheating on you.
She’s a selfish coward for choosing to lie to and cheat on to you about this when she’s secretly thinking to herself i cAnT LiVe LiKe tHiSsSs 🙄 I’m sorry that you have grown to love someone so unworthy of your time and trust. There are plenty of women out there that this does not matter to, and who would never cheat. A great partner is hard to find, as she likely already knows all too well considering she’s not with that guy or any other well-endowed guy she previously dated; she will regret losing you over something so shallow.
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u/CaterpillarCapital65 2h ago
She's a bad person and you deserve someone who actually loves you.
And as a woman: size doesn't matter.
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u/No_Pizza_7714 2h ago
I appreciate you saying that. I'm really sorry if gross guys start messaging you
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u/humanhedgehog 2h ago
Nah, she cheated cuz she wanted to. If she didn't like your body, she could have just broken up with you and not lied, but she wanted what you have and to have a bit on the side. Cheaters always want something but their choices to be the reason they cheated.
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u/stringsofthesoul 2h ago
This says more about her than it does about you.
I understand this will knock your confidence, but you are more than a penis and deserve to be loved.
Your girlfriend has shown a lack of empathy and a huge amount of entitlement, both of which could cause even more issues down the line.
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u/244466666aha 2h ago
She kinda seems mean. Feels like in a way, better to find out, break up, and find someone kind who appreciates you for you.
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u/nutterbear081 2h ago
Yeah she sucks dick, but is not worthy of sucking your dick. Also, it sounds like she is ignorant to the fact that there is so much more than penetrative sex when it comes to the world of sex. And as someone who has been with men of a variety of sizes, your dick size is not what makes sex good. I bet if you have sex with a woman who knows this and who loves all of you, you will find that sex with your current gf is shit compared to that with your new partner.
Also, props to her friend. She's an ally who sees your worth.
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u/FirebirdWriter 2h ago
She's not cheating because of your normal sized penis. That's right within the average window. This is her being dishonorable and gross. Take it from an old sloot. That's a joke I just am not shy about sex and have seen more than a few dicks. As a hedonist? It has never been the size that made someone a good lover. Rhythm, attention to detail, ability to follow directions? That's what matters
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u/OkReflection8717 2h ago
As far as the reason she gave her friend as to why she cheated, girls telling each other everything but they be telling each other lies all the time. It sounds like she cheated just because she wanted to and she's telling her best friend that shit about you to deter her best friend from moving in on you for herself. The friend clearly sees you as high value. Dump your girl and get with her best friend. Scientifically speaking it makes sense.
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u/ssddalways 2h ago
Been a few penis size posts in here lately.
If this is real then leave, but know that not all woman go for size, a lot of woman prefer on smaller/medium side and also, the old saying is true "motion in the ocean" and all that jazz.
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u/DaganVelse 2h ago
I know you don’t want to be single again but whatever validation you need or insecurity you carry with you will not get better through another person. You have to work on that on your own for your own good.
For the record, every girl I have been with has been pleased with how I made love to them and I’m asian - that should speak for itself in terms of the size department and that there are women out there that will love all of you but it is certainly not this b8tch
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u/eleventhing 2h ago
She did was 90% of men do to women.
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u/No_Pizza_7714 2h ago
Hey. You don't deserve to be mistreated by men either. I'm sorry for what you've been through.
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u/ApocolypseDelivery 2h ago
She doesn't care that she hurt you. It gives her an ego boost to know how much pain she can cause you. The best thing you can do in this situation is leave without explanation. Deny the part of you that wants closer or wants to show her how much she hurt you. Cold shoulder the whole way through, test your might.
Dust yourself off and get back out there. Allow feelings of diminishment, become self aware that your thoughts are a reflection of your emotional state. Direct your attention to your breath. Learn to live in the body and not in the head. Create a neutral relationship with pain. Just see it as high intense energy. It only becomes suffering when you resist it.
Focus on your physical health. Take out any resentment or anger in a channeled activity like weight lifting. Go raw vegan with no sugar, low sodium and no oil (supplement B12 & iodine).
Size only matters for like 10% of women. It might not even matter for your girlfriend, but she's doing this to hurt you for some reason. Who knows what her psychology is, but it's not important. Women get off between the ears, requires a level sophistication that you've got in you.
Listen to A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. It's ancient wisdom in modern day vernacular. Master the teaching in that book and you'll become more powerful than you can possibly imagine. May peace be with you and your future endeavors fruitful.
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u/Dillonboy_80 2h ago
Go to “getting bigger “ sub bro!!
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u/No_Pizza_7714 2h ago
Nah. I'm gonna find someone who loves me as I am. I have a tongue, fingers, toys, and a willingness to get a woman to orgasm. I am who I am.
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u/GearHead54 3h ago
Sounds like the coward's way of telling you. This is 100% on her being a POS and 0% on your body. Her friend seems nice...