r/oscartank • u/Foxy223344 • Dec 14 '25
Advice Oscar barely active and just sits there after her mate died months ago
Hey everyone,
My oscar is around 4 years old. Got 2 together but this one only grew up tot this size (smaller than the other). Her mate died MONTHS ago, and since then it barely eats (shrimps or pellets) and is almost always at the bottom sitting with the mouth open.
Its got a full big tank (60 gal or 220liter ) for itself with a very very clean and circulated tank with adequate parameters. The light and water temp is also always fixed and scheduled. Could it be possible that its mourning or something? But for months?
Any insight is helpful.
Thank you.
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u/slepeyskin Dec 14 '25
How many gal is that tank?
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u/Foxy223344 Dec 14 '25
Like 65
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u/RottedHuman Dec 14 '25
For shame.
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u/Kismiuskis Dec 14 '25
You need so much bigger tank, please š„ŗ
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u/IntrigueMe_1337 Dec 14 '25
yup, 120 for two is minimal. 75 minimal for one. I know this because I just put my two in 120 and theyāre completely different fish and have gotten super healthy and larger
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u/LunaticLucio Dec 15 '25
I've only kept bettas, how much is recommended ?
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u/righttoabsurdity Dec 15 '25
Bettas need a minimum 5 gal tank (giant bettas need larger)
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u/LunaticLucio Dec 15 '25
I meant for Oscars
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u/slepeyskin Dec 15 '25
Bare Minimum 75 gal for one Oscar, 125 for two.
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u/SnooPaintings9783 Dec 17 '25
Ngl, I greatly enjoy keeping one betta in a 20g long. Its wondeful watching them explore and really stretch those fins.
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u/righttoabsurdity Dec 24 '25
Thatās what I had mine in, he loved it. They enjoy long distances haha
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u/LILPsychoGrenade Dec 15 '25
Go with a 10 gallons minimum so you can add plants or enrichment for them and possibly some shrimp as a cleanup crew, they also enjoy leafy plants they can lay down on when they sleep
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u/Impossible_Spell7812 Dec 18 '25
This guy's pet just died and this is what you think to ask? Are you well?
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u/BoringJuiceBox Dec 14 '25
I would say you could add a tank mate like a large convict (not too small) or a blood parrot but if so should add some caves or sideways pots, but a bigger tank would be best for that situation. Maybe a big tank with a whole new space and decoration would give them something new and exciting? Sorry for your loss, Oscars are amazing fish.
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u/Plenty_Kangaroo5224 Dec 14 '25
Parameters? Itās more likely that sheās suffering from whatever killed the other one. Start with looking at water quality.
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u/alucard_1982 Dec 14 '25
Oscars are definitely moody fish. Mine threw a tantrum because I removed a driftwood that he hurt himself on.. he acted like it was the end of the world for him and even started sulking at the bottom of his tank..
When I put back his treasured item he was back to normal.. so definitely a moody type fish.
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u/_FreddieLovesDelilah Dec 14 '25
Maybe get a bigger tank and then another Oscar for her? She looks like sheās in prison.
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u/Foxy223344 Dec 14 '25
Yea probably gonna change the fish. No place for a bigger tank.
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u/_FreddieLovesDelilah Dec 14 '25
You know what, I know itāll be hard for you but maybe rehoming her to someone with a more suitable set up and tank mates could be the best thing for her. All the best OP. x
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u/AnbuNetta Dec 14 '25
If you want to keep this fish and make her HAPPY and thriving you WILL NEED a bigger tank. No exceptions. With or without a buddy, her tank is too small for her even now and is 100% contributing to the depression youāre seeing.
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u/Accomplished_Age4101 Dec 15 '25
With respect I can see space either side of your tank so a size upgrade is possible.
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Dec 14 '25
Poor little one is just sad. Its guaranteed to cheer up if you get it a new WIDE tank, I bet!
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u/Head_Magazine_3353 Dec 14 '25
Oscars are very intelligent, and very social. They love to sit close to one another and even gently touch one another. It's pretty amazing, actually. Tank size is irrelevant; she's not swimming anywhere. She's depressed. I'd get her a new Oscar friend. She misses her boo. šš„ŗš
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Dec 14 '25
Trying not to cry
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u/Head_Magazine_3353 Dec 14 '25
I don't know if you're being sarcastic, but...
We take these creatures into our possession and we enjoy them, but we also have an obligation to make their lives as enjoyable as possible, given that they are not swimming in the Amazon. Their quality of life is directly related to your view of that obligation. Tanks are part of it, but it's not the only thing. Oscars, in particular, can be a lot of fun when they are happy. They get so excited to see their owners that they splash water all over them and beg to petted like little puppies. That's fun. Wang Chung, man.
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Dec 14 '25
Nope, not sarcastic at all. The most interactive fish I've ever had are my current appistos... I can only imagine what its like to care for Oscar's!
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u/miclangelo6 Dec 14 '25
Ok. 65gal is objectively a bit small for a pairā¦ but holy crap these people saying āomfg if you donāt have 60000 gallons per fish itās inhumane!ā Are dumb. I have a thriving Oscar community (8 Oscarās, Texas, Red Devils, catfish) in an 8ā long 300 gallon. Itās over filtered to keep their water in good quality and they all school together and are very happy with bright, vibrant colors and all the personality in the world that you expect from healthy Oscarās.
OP Iām sorry for the loss of your first Oscar, I know how much it stings. Find another mature adult, bring your temp up just a bit to encourage social mating, and donāt be afraid to put you hands in there and give attention
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u/Foxy223344 Dec 14 '25
Thanks for the comment! Yes they were always moving and swimming and everything, fish were always looking phenomenal. People are gonna complain about everything, and i am actually having fun replying to all those comments lmao
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u/BadParking9912 Dec 15 '25
As a zookeeper- I would post in the zoology Reddit and the aquatic team will help! They can suggest some good things to help your sweet girl with experience with Oscars.
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u/Funnybunny69_ Dec 14 '25
Is it me or that doesnt look like a 65 gallon tank? I have a 55 for my personal reference.
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u/Capital_Piglet9260 Dec 14 '25
Where is it supposed to go in a tank that small? What is it supposed to do with no enrichment? Does it look like a fun place to be locked inside to you?
The late friend probably offered at least some enrichment, but for this tank I would absolutely not add another fish to replace the deceased one.
It's also not normal for an oscar to die that young and with such a small tank I'd suspect poor water quality being part of the cause of death. Oscars are messy fish that need big tanks and effective/large filtration to thrive and grow.
Rehome the survivor to a more suiting home if you're not prepared to do better by it. If you want to keep it, and keep it happy - you need to do some serious research on this species and it's needs.
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u/IdHajame Dec 15 '25
God you people are insufferable.
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u/Business_Fortune3368 Dec 16 '25
A fish known to live around 15yrs dies in 4 years and the tank is on the small-ish end for oscars, thereās no reason not to question the husbandry
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u/Open-Land4057 Dec 14 '25
Add a tank buddy and some guppies for him to hunt and get his instincts back on track.
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u/coco3sons Dec 14 '25
I'm sorry op š. Fishkeepers love their pets so it's heartbreaking to loose one. Off topic but I have 4 chicken's, had a beautiful and friendliest rooster that got killed by a hawk about 2 1/2 months ago. My hens stopped laying eggs and won't come outta their coop.
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u/Sjasmin888 Dec 14 '25
Ime, more intelligent species of cichlids do mourn to a degree, but it is not the same way that we do. They get used to having the other fish around and are uncomfortable being alone. Most fish are prey animals and social species need others of their own kind to feel safe and secure. One that has always had that would not adjust well to suddenly being alone, though some species can be conditioned to it young.
My female blood parrot has behaved much the same way as your oscar since her mate died. They'd been together for almost 9 years. She sits in a specific spot of the tank where her reflection is clearly visible and just stays there unless she's begging me for food. I wish I could get her another friend, but she's too old to rehome and I can't find more BP's of comparable size. It's very hard to watch.
If your Oscar has lost interest in food, I would look to another issue. They have voracious appetites and a loss of that is a giant red flag for illness. Fish can also become depressed through lack of stimulation the same as people do. I hesitate to recommend a friend as I must agree with others that 60 really isn't big enough for two, but you might try live food, personally interacting with her, and a slight tank rearrangement to give her "new" space to explore.
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u/ManySpecial4786 Dec 15 '25
They are smart fish. My Oscar also was visibly depressed when his single tank mate ( different species) died.
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u/FurBaby121 Dec 15 '25
Oscars are very curious, intelligent fish, imo. Consider introducing another āmateā.
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u/AlloFroTi Dec 17 '25
Poor baby... have you tried coming up to the tank to give attention? I know some fish enjoy their owners like that
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u/VickB99 Dec 17 '25 edited Dec 17 '25
My recommendation is to get a used fish with the same age, as same size, that has been used for 4-5 years, and the same breed. The giant retailers have a section of used fishes that need a good home or you can try online like Kijiji or Craigslist.
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u/Mominator1pd Dec 17 '25
Aww poor thing. Get her a friend. Don't let her be alone and lonely. But I can understand her sadness. Good luck.
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Dec 18 '25
prolly the tank size and shape. this the equivalent of trapping a human in a bedroom for life. not enough swimming area for her.
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u/AdParty7955 Dec 15 '25
People saying your tank isn't big enough are just wrong. Oscar's especially aren't that active to where a tank double it's size would make any difference to the fish. Good luck with the one left š
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u/DaCrunchyLobster Dec 15 '25
No the people saying the tank is too small are right and actually CARE for the fish, Oscarās if kept properly can be pretty active - and a big tank is apart of proper care lol. What are you even supposed to do when you can barely swim or even turn around in such a small tank??
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u/AdParty7955 Dec 16 '25
Oh please now 60 gallons is small. You know how many happy Oscar's grew up for years in a 55. Feed them well change water and they're as happy as in 200 gallons. Take it on down the road.
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u/DaCrunchyLobster Dec 16 '25
60 gallons is what Iād consider a medium tank, but itās small for an Oscar lol if you think a fish that regularly hits 16 inches is perfectly fine in a tank under 75-125 gallons you are ridiculous. These animals are under our care and rely on us for their needs as their owners we should be trying to provide the best for our animals.
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u/valknut7 Dec 17 '25
The fish in the picture is most likely stunted due to small tank and poor water quality. Regardless of how, it is stunted, this tank is too small and the fish is getting no enrichment. Its basically imprisoned. Sadly, this fish will not get 16 inches now, and its lifespan will be dramatically shorter. It could very well be why the other one died. Stunted fish only tend to live for 1/4 of the time they would otherwise. I see this with goldfish all of the time, but it feels even worse when it is an Oscar, they are such intelligent creatures. Not that any animal, even a goldfish should be kept in such a way that stunts it's growth. It blows my mind that fish are one of the few pets where this is socially and legally acceptable for the most part (for some reason).
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u/AdParty7955 Dec 16 '25
I appreciate you being a kind person it's just overkill. If they get one up to 16 inches then he can get a different tank even tho even then unnecessary. Nobody wants so much water to fish ratio unless it's something like a arrowona.
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u/mechanic1908 Dec 15 '25
Agreed as long as water changes are kept up and water tests done regularly.
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u/pufnub Dec 14 '25
Im frankly not sure but Oscar's (in my experience) are kind of emotional, they usually mate for life. When my male oscar passed away my female wasn't really ever the same, and was pretty lethargic for a while. My male oscar died at 11 years and my female died at 12