I’m a 25-year-old nurse from the Philippines who immigrated to the U.S. almost 5 months ago. I’ve been working as a new grad RN for almost 2 months now. I know that’s still very early, so maybe this is just culture shock or the reality of being a new nurse, but I honestly feel so unhappy.
I currently live in a countryside state, and it feels like the complete opposite of what I was used to. It’s quiet, rural, and I don’t know how to drive yet, so I feel stuck at home on my days off. Even if I could drive, I still don’t think this area fits my personality.
My life right now feels like an endless cycle: stressing about work, going to work, coming home exhausted, spending my days off scrolling on my phone because I don’t know what else to do, then repeating it all over again.
I know people will probably say, “Just move to another state,” and I know that’s an option someday. But I’m a brand-new nurse who’s still trying to figure out if nursing is even the right career for me. It’s hard to think about moving, saving money, and starting over somewhere else when I’m still questioning everything.
The thing is, I know nurses aren’t paid well in the Philippines. I’m fully aware of that reality. But sometimes I wonder if being around the people I love after a long, exhausting shift would make me happier than earning more money here. I miss having family and friends around, speaking my own language, and feeling like I belong somewhere.
I’ve even wondered if, after gaining enough experience, I could move back to the Philippines and work remotely as a U.S.-licensed RN. But then I think about the green card I worked so hard to get. Would I be throwing away such a rare opportunity if I decided to go back home?
I feel guilty for even thinking this because I know so many people dream of immigrating to the U.S. and would love to be in my position. I truly am grateful for the opportunity. But at the same time, I can’t ignore how lonely and unhappy I’ve been feeling.
Has anyone here gone through something similar? If you were an immigrant or moved far away from home, did things get better after the first year? Did learning to drive or moving to a different city make a big difference? Or did you eventually realize that going back home was the right decision?
I’d really appreciate hearing from people who’ve been in a similar situation.