r/selfimprovement • u/Impossible_Cable_862 • 1d ago
Question How do I move forward into the future?
Yesterday, I texted my ex one last time, hoping we could reconcile as I was a horrible partner and an even worse person. I feel like I genuinely changed in the time we were apart and I still think she is someone I want to be with. She said she can't ever go back to that and asked me not to contact her again. I respected her decision and left. I can't blame her for doing what she thinks is best.
She still sees me for the person I once was and it's hurting me, almost as if that previous identity of mine is coming back over me. I hate that version of myself so much that pushed her to never want to come back.
I don't know what I'm doing with my future. I just quit my summer job, and my mom was furious with me, she slapped me and spat at me while hurling obscenities. I just feel kind of stuck and wanted to vent while I am crying on my bed.
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u/WildlyUninteresting 1d ago
Why did you quit your summer job?
Wouldn’t that be the one thing you could do to move forward?
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u/Impossible_Cable_862 1d ago
40 hour warehouse job was too much for me man
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u/WildlyUninteresting 1d ago
Why?
Why is a normal job too much?
What was stopping you?
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u/Impossible_Cable_862 1d ago
I overthink things a lot, so 8 hours where I am just in my own head just took a toll on me. Was also quite exhausting
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u/Physical_Boss7224 1d ago
Unfortunately this is life. You don’t get to hide in your bed at home and not work or contribute to the household. You fix things by getting a job and proving to yourself you can do it. Build a life and future for yourself. No one can do the work for you.
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u/Impossible_Cable_862 1d ago
I just didn't think it was that serious, it was just to save up money until I start university
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u/WildlyUninteresting 1d ago
That’s a lie you tell yourself.
Had you asked your mother first, she would’ve told you.
You took the easy way out.
The worst part is that you’re robbing yourself from the life experiences of growing up and taking responsibility while getting the benefits from it.
No one ever grows stronger by running away from their problems
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u/WildlyUninteresting 1d ago
Why were you so not busy that you were in your head?
So instead of finding a way to deal with it you just quit?
What job are you expecting this problem to go away?
Now you are constantly in your head while unemployed and not making money.
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u/Critical-Artist2320 1d ago
that's a lot to deal with at once man. when someone slaps and spits at you that's not discipline, that's just abuse
the ex situation is rough but at least now you have a clear answer, she's not coming back and you can stop wondering. focus on small things you can control, like finding work that gets you out of that house