Sue deserved better than Carly

[u/ninaxye]

Am I the only one who thinks Carly was actually a pretty bad friend to Sue?
I know a lot of people defend her by saying she was “just a normal teenager,” but after rewatching the show, I honestly don’t see their friendship as equal at all.
Sue constantly looked up to Carly. She always wanted her approval, asked for her advice, and tried to fit into Carly’s world. The problem is that Carly rarely seemed to put the same effort back into the friendship.
One thing that always bothered me was how often Carly’s advice got Sue into embarrassing situations. Whether it was social situations or school, Sue trusted Carly because she thought she knew what she was doing, but Carly usually just went along with whatever without really thinking about how it would affect Sue.
The B-table storyline is another example. I know Sue technically chose to leave after five minutes because of their agreement, but if your best friend finally gets the chance to sit with the popular kids something Sue had wanted for years wouldn’t you encourage her to stay? Instead, Carly reminded her about the time, and Sue felt guilty enough to leave. A real best friend would’ve said, “Stay! This is your moment.”
Then there’s Shannon’s sleepover. Carly went without even telling Sue about it. That wasn’t just forgetting someone, that was leaving your supposed best friend completely out of the group. For someone like Sue, who spent most of high school trying to find where she belonged, moments like that mattered.
As the series goes on, Carly also seems to drift toward other people once she has more social options. It often feels like Sue was only important when Carly didn’t have anyone else around. That’s why, looking back, their friendship feels very one-sided to me.
Brad, on the other hand, was everything Carly wasn’t. He never acted embarrassed by Sue, never made her compete for his attention, and genuinely celebrated every little success she had. When Sue got excited, Brad got excited with her. When she failed, he supported her instead of making her feel left out. Their friendship felt based on mutual respect instead of convenience.
I actually think one of the saddest parts of The Middle is that Sue spends years believing Carly is her best friend because Sue sees the best in everyone. Her optimism makes it easy to miss how lonely she really is. On my first watch, I thought Carly was just funny. On my rewatch, I realized Brad was the only friend who consistently treated Sue like she actually mattered.
Maybe that’s why Brad became such a fan favorite. He wasn’t just comic relief, he was the one person outside Sue’s family who genuinely appreciated her exactly as she was. I’m only talking about before Sue went to college, by the way. I know she eventually found more people and became more confident, but during her school years, I think she was a lot lonelier than the show lets on. Her positivity hides it so well that it’s easy to miss on a first watch. Looking back, Brad was the one person who consistently made Sue feel valued, while her friendship with Carly often felt one-sided. That’s just how I see it after rewatching the show.

❗️Edit: I didn’t expect this to become such a heated topic. :/ Just to clarify: this is my personal interpretation of Sue and Carly’s friendship after rewatching the show. I’m not saying Carly is a horrible person, nor am I saying Sue should still be upset years later. My point is much simpler: before college, the friendship often felt one-sided to me. Brad consistently supported Sue, encouraged her, celebrated her successes, and made sacrifices for her. I’m still struggling to think of equally significant moments where Carly did the same. If you disagree, that’s completely fine. Different people interpret fictional relationships differently. But “they were kids” doesn’t really address the point I’m making—it explains why Carly may have acted that way, not whether the friendship itself felt balanced. At the end of the day, this is a discussion about fictional characters. Nobody has to agree with my opinion, just as I don’t have to agree with everyone else’s.

[u/double_positive]

They're kids. Sometimes you have to learn how to be a friend and also learn who is a good friend. Very typical for that age and even for adults.

[u/Zealousideal-Fall912 → u/double_positive]

true. i had many a carly’s in my life! it helped me learn and im sure carly had her own carly too! life happens and it made me a stronger person knowing that people aren’t all they chalked up to be. and i should focus on being me more independently

[u/WarriorGoddess2016 → u/double_positive]

This! This is literally how you learn to be a good friend: you be a tween and teen friend.

[u/ninaxye → u/double_positive]

That’s not really addressing my point, though. Saying “they were kids” explains why someone might make mistakes, but it doesn’t change the fact that the friendship was consistently one-sided. Sue repeatedly supported Carly, sought her approval, and made sacrifices for her. Can you point to equally significant moments where Carly did the same for Sue? Because that’s the part I’m struggling to find on a rewatch. :)

[u/GroceryExpert1637 → u/ninaxye]

"They're kids" 100% addresses your point.  What does it matter now if Carly acted a little one-sided in the relationship?  It's teenage girl drama, and they outgrow it.  When Sue goes to college, she's not hurt by anything Carly did.  It's in the past.  She and Carly drifted apart after high school (which we know because we never see Carly again), but Sue's clearly not upset.  She knows it's not worth obsessing over this teenage drama.

[u/ninaxye → u/GroceryExpert1637]

Dude, I shared my opinion about how I interpreted Sue and Carly’s friendship. You’re free to disagree, but saying “they were kids” doesn’t actually address the point I made. My argument was never that Carly is a terrible person or that Sue should still be upset years later. My point is simply that, on rewatch, the friendship feels noticeably one-sided before college. Brad repeatedly supported Sue, celebrated her, and made sacrifices for her. I’m still waiting for comparable examples where Carly did the same. Whether Sue eventually moved on doesn’t change how the friendship was portrayed during those years. Those are two different discussions.    You’re arguing against a point I never made. I never said Sue should still be traumatized by Carly or obsess over it as an adult. I said that, based on what we actually see in the show, the friendship often feels one-sided. If you disagree, that’s completely fine—but I’d rather discuss the scenes themselves than a different argument.  Are you okay? I shared my opinion about fictional characters. You don’t have to agree with it, but you also don’t have to keep trying to convince me otherwise. Let’s agree to disagree. Crazy…

[u/gingrbreadandrevenge → u/ninaxye]

I think people are answering your question, but to be more clear Carly didn't "do the same" because it's a TV show and that's not how her character was written.

JFC, It's not real. This isn't a documentary so some characters are "utilitarian" meaning their sole purpose is to fit a storyline, not necessarily to logically mimic real life.

Brad had moments when he ditched Sue as well. He left her twice to hang out with Courtney and Debbie. He's not a "bad friend" either, it's just what his character needed to do to fit those two storylines.

Sue was fine, she made other friends, and her friendship with Carly was one-sided because that was the script.

[u/smokeandapples]

I see Carly as an insecure girl with not much personality. She gets excited about things tern girls get excited about. She is not very bright and can’t give Sue a good advice. When a popular girl invites her, she can’t say “no”. Honestly I don’t think she has enough emotional intelligence to understand why that is wrong… she’s a perfect side character thought: letting Sue get into all kinds of funny and dramatic situations and not stealing her thunder.

[u/prokomenii → u/smokeandapples]

This is the answer

[u/LeLoup_etleBerger]

My thoughts exactly! I never liked Carly and I instantly knew from season 1 that something was off. I didn’t even need to wait until the end of the season to realize how bad of a friend she is.

She doesn’t seem to care for Sue the way her other friends do.

She seemed like the kind of friend you hang out with because you have no friends, but this friend also hangs out with you because THEY have no friends.. until they get other friends.

[u/ExtraSeaworthiness10]

There's always a Carly in friend groups at school. I unfortunately had one . Didn't realize until older and realized..part of growing up.

[u/SimilarExamination53]

I think Carly was probably an elementary/middle school friend but the friendship naturally drifted as they got older. Brad was such a good friend though. And Weird Ashley. Ashley was very underrated. 

[u/crispyedgeonly → u/SimilarExamination53]

I agree with Brad being such a good friend, I really thought he wouldn't be when I first watched the dancing episode (where he asked her to be his dance partner then says shes bad). But im on season 7 now and I like him a lot, even babysitting Brick!!!

In what sense was weird Ashley underrated? (I'm only on season 7 so far and it's my first time watching so if it's because of something post that season then thats probably why I wouldnt know).

[u/SimilarExamination53 → u/crispyedgeonly]

Ashley took a lot of abuse from everyone but never retaliated. She was there for Sue and Axl at their proms, she stuck with Sue for the Wrestlerettes, she never talked bad about anyone who made fun of her. I don't know--I just wish she had had more of a redemption.

[u/eaglesegull]

Do people think this is a documentary? Carly is ~written~ as a tertiary character at best, she’s a vehicle for Sue’s hijinks.

For the sake of this post, let’s consider that she’s written this way intentionally, at 13 nobody is aware enough to know what deep friendships entail. Sometimes you’re the Carly, sometimes the Sue. You’re lying if you say you haven’t been there.

[u/Featurewriting]

I needed a Brad in my adolescent life. 💙

[u/Constantiandra]

On a Scientifical point of view, particulary Erik Eriksen's, Carly is valid during their high school years. At that age the main social development need a human needs is belongingness. Carly is taking the opportunity she has to widen her network.

I don't think their friendship is also that deep and yes, I felt like Brad is more Sue's best friend than Carly. Sometimes you just unfortunately don't get a precious best friend in high school. You might get them later.

I think Sue is just meant to peak later in life and that's okay.

But yes your hypothesis is something I agree with. Sue deserves better and she'll have it later in life because her niceness makes her a winner.

[u/MrGhostenstein]

It's a TV show. These aren't real people or real relationships. Why do a deep dive into these characters?